A soft spoken but actually rather serious PSA for the RPC:
Whilst I understand wanting to chase toxic, abusive and dangerous people from a safe community I think some of you need to take a small moment and remember that fictional content is a form of exploration and understanding.
Yes. There are gross people who fetashize, who use dark topics as a way to worm into things they shouldn’t. I understand that, entirely.
But whilst you’re all hopping on every blog who breathes something you don’t agree with, can we take a second to remember that it is incredibly common for survivors and mentally ill people to turn to dark, problematic or messed up fiction as a way to understand, work through, dissect and rationalise their abuse?
There are people writing Topics you don’t like as an outlet for their incredibly bad days and this instant demonisation of anyone who writes something you don’t personally agree with? It’s not creating a safe space, or a safe environment.
And the funny thing is, people do not owe you an abuse check list card for you to decide they’re abused enough to be allowed to write it. You have no right to demand someones trauma to validate your control over their content. How would you feel if someone asked you to prove your history in order to find an outlet for your abuse? If you truly understand then you’d understand why that isn’t alright.
People will take advantage of dark fiction, I’m not going to argue with you. Except that people will take advantage of anything, childrens stories, safe spaces, the purest content you can imagine will be twisted at some point. Some people are absolute pricks about it. Some of its triggering, some of its uncomfortable.
But you do not get to turn around and place your personal comfort levels onto everyone around you as a way of controlling your area.
Whilst some people cope through completely blocking out, turning from and needing no contact with their abuse (understandable) others need a fictional outlet to handle thoughts they can’t handle otherwise.
Writing fiction with dark, problematic content is a safe, taggable, block-able way for people to have an outlet. You’re taking a safe space from survivors on the off chance you’ll catch someone abusing the system. That’s not helping anyone, gatekeeping doesn’t fix anything.
Making your space safe for you is important but so is respecting other people’s. If someone on tumblr is a genuine danger, a proven danger, then contact law enforcement or report it to the appropriate authorities, they’ll decide from there. If however you are placing the lives of not real, not harm-able, not living fictional characters above the realities of real people? I think you need to sit down and ask yourself if you’re actually trying to help people or control your space.
Your trauma does not give you the right to dictate other people’s trauma.
Fiction is not real. Yes, it effects people in real time However just like it triggers you, it helps someone else. It’s your responsibility to be safe on this site, it’s parents responsibility to protect their children from finding or seeing that content (Adults deserve safe spaces also, remember that) and it’s the bloggers responsibility to tag and not take over.
I’m the last person to tell you to ignore dangers, what I’m saying is that if you’re actively searching triggering content as a way to force people to censor themselves for your contentment? You’re only harming yourself, that’s an incredibly dangerous habit.
That is a form of self harm.
So leave dark/problematic writers alone. There are people who abuse the system but you’re not the police, you’re not a militia who can actually prove anything, stop anything or change anything. Do you not think on what happens when people lump everyone together to find one needle? As someone in the mental health system I know what it’s like to loose help to people who are turning their nose up at maybes, ifs and potential takers.
Donate to survivors charities, go out and do marches, help REAL people instead of worrying about NOT REAL people.
Survivors who cope through fiction are as valid as survivors who escape through it, neither of us should be forced to stop coping. From one survivor to another: What makes your trauma more valid than mine?
If you have the time, please read the following links - be aware of heavy trigger warnings
An Explanation on dangers of Censorship
Staying safe online
Coping after sexual abuse
The reality of dealing with abuse and fictional outlets
Resilience and Trauma Theory of Adult Incest Survivors
Assault and Rape writing power for survivors
Real Survivors Discuss Coping After Assault (including dark writing)
okay, so here’s the thing
romanticizing and fetishizing dark topics is wrong. that we can all agree on. because it normalizes things that people survive every day.
but… trying to take away someone’s coping mechanism is horrible and cruel. i have a degree in psychology and we were taught that people cope in different ways. we were presented with a series about a woman who had spent her college years raped by an acquaintance and turned around and coped through writing stories. those stories eventually became published works of fiction. and it helped.
my own therapist when i told her about the abuse that i had suffered for three years with an ex, when i told her about the days i was raped repeatedly and told her that it was easier for me to write about it because i felt like i wasn’t alone, felt like i was in control of the situation for once… she encouraged it.
if people are writing dark topics to cope? leave them alone. especially if things are tagged properly. especially if they aren’t harassing or hurting anyone and are writing consensually with an adult partner.
it isn’t any of your business what someone’s trauma is. it’s none of your business what someone’s coping mechanism is. and it’s none of your business to dig through blogs to see if they were “traumatized” enough. no one owes anyone an explanation, no one owes anyone pages upon pages of an explanation as to why it helps.
black list tags. block blogs.
do what YOU need to do to keep your dash safe. it isn’t your responsibility to keep EVERYONE’S dash safe for YOU. let them take responsibility for that. don’t harass people for doing what helps them.
and those writing dark topics?
tag everything simply and easily.
from one survivor to the dash,
you have no right to undermine my trauma because it doesn’t match yours.
