˙ . ꒷ 🪼 . 𖦹˙— PSA for minors: Grooming isn't always obvious - Please read and share to protect yourself and your friends on the internet
Grooming doesn't always start overtly graphic or blatantly explicit. In the vast majority of cases, it begins with building trust and pushing boundaries. Here are subtle but dangerous behaviors adults (or even older teens) may use to desensitize minors to exploitation: /srs
🚩 ;; Sharing inappropriate content under the guise of "education" or "you're so mature"
The groomer may discuss and/or expose the minor to kinks, fetishes, paraphilias (pedophilia, and almost every word that ends in "philia"), and/or BD/SM, excusing himself/herself with "I'm just educating you", "I'm just teaching you", "I'm telling you this because you're mature for your age", "I'm showing you this because you're mature for your age", etc. /srs
The groomer may share, discuss, and/or expose the minor to NS/FW content, such as pornography, NS/FW drawings, NS/FW books or writings, and so on. /srs
The groomer may encourage private conversations with the minor, and/or online interactions in private spaces. A private Discord server, or directly going to the minor's DMs, are some examples of this. Groomers may prefer private platforms, such as Discord or Telegram, to exploit the minor. /srs
The groomer may ask the minor to keep their conversations, relationship, and/or interactions as a "secret". The groomer may discourage the minor to tell his/her parents, and/or friends about the situation. /srs
"Don't tell your parents about our chats. They wouldn't understand", "What we have is special, it's a secret because others wouldn't understand", "It'll be our little secret", are common phrases used by groomers. /srs
🚩 ;; Emotional manipulation
The groomer may emotionally manipulate the minor before exploiting him/her. Tactics such as Love-Bombing and Guilt-Tripping are common. /srs
Some common phrases of Love-Bombing are the following ones: /srs
"You're my favorite person ever! 🩷"
"You're the cutest girl/boy around! ✨"
"You're the best artist/writer/dancer in the world! 💫"
"Who is my best friend? 🌟 You are! 💖"
"You are perfect and beautiful! 💘"
"I can't be without you 🌈"
Some common phrases of Guilt-Tripping are the following ones: /srs
"If you tell someone about this, I'll be so sad 💔"
"If you tell someone about this, I'll be so mad 🫤"
"What? After everything I've done for you? You're going to do this to me? 💔" -> Especially common when the minor confronts the groomer about his/her actions.
"You'll ruin my life if you bring this out to light. You know that, right? 😶"
"Oh! So, I'm the guilty one? You started all of this! 🫤"
"If you tell someone about what we have, I'll kill myself. Seriously"
🚩 ;; Testing physical or emotional boundaries
The groomer may ask invasive questions to the minor about his/her relationships, his/her body, his/her underwear, his/her sex life, and other questions that cover highly private (and even sexual) topics of the minor's life. /srs
The groomer may "joke" with the minor about taboo or disturbing topics such as rape, incest, age gap relationships, child abuse, pedophilia, kidnapping, grooming, sexting, and so on, to gauge reactions. /srs
The groomer may try to isolate the minor, in order to discourage him or her from speaking up about the situation. /srs
"Your high school friends are so toxic. I'm the only one who gets you", is an example of this behavior. /srs
🚩 ;; Role Reversal (Parentification)
The groomer may treat the minor as a therapist or as an adult. The groomer may talk with the minor about adult problems, such as sex or relationships. /srs
🚩 ;; Gift Giving or Special Treatment
The groomer may send the minor money, art, or gifts to create obligation, and to position himself or herself as a reliable person. The groomer may offer "private mentoring" or "private lessons" in art, writing or any other activity within the minor's interests and hobbies. /srs
Remember kids, if someone online tells you something that makes you feel uncomfortable, don't be afraid to block and tell a trusted adult! It could be your father, your mother, your neighbor, your teacher, your uncle, your aunt, your older (adult) sibling, your cousin, or even a police officer. Search for hotlines in your area to reach out for help and support. You are not alone and none of this is your fault. The groomer is the guilty one, and the one to blame, not you. /srs
