Squints

I'm made of sarcasm and homosexuality SC:untilwewake95 IG:amanda_squints

[owlet]

hate to repost but the bde that is sheerly radiating out of this picture is just too much

[leftoversalad]

[tastefullyoffensive]

Adulthood.

[fluorideuraniumcarbonpotassium]

“Find someone who fucks you as hard as they make you laugh.”

—

[medusabraids]

i’m losing my fucking mind (x)

[kscotter]

I ACTUALLY SCREAMED

[newyorkcityhomo]

THIS WAS TOO MUCH FOR ME I CANNOT IM DONE

[fourglasseyes]

[mittybee]

[lumberzachary]

How do you explain to someone that this is your sense of humor

[poppunkkid-deactivated20220930]

I was wondering where this was going and lemme tell you I fell out of my chair

[weloveshortvideos]

Kmart deserves commercial of the year

[breadwolf]

OH THEY’RE SAYING GAS

[mis3rybiscuits]

Saw the opportunity and didn’t let it pass them

[shitimissu]

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[lovemakesyouwonder]

[lovemakesyouwonder]

(18+)

[futw]

The Miseducation of Cameron Post (2018)

[sarahbyrk]

“I don’t mess around or play games. I don’t believe in them. I just want honesty. I’d rather wake up one morning and say, “You know what? I had a really terrible dream that you were fucking someone else. Can you love me extra today?” instead of getting in a fight about some stupid shit and then at the end of the day being like, “Okay, can I tell you why I’ve been acting like this?” I’d rather say “Heads up” than “I’m sorry” later. Your relationship is supposed to be the safe place.”

— John Mayer on the secret to having a good relationship

[dosesxmimosas]

BIG MOOD: me + you + a cabin in the mountains, sitting in the hot tub, drink in hand, not a care in the world

[lizabethl]

Why is this not FLOODING my feed?!

Don Cheadle rocking this shirt while hosting SNL is EVERYTHING.

Thank you, Don ❤❤❤

[dollymyfolly-deactivated2026032]

I’m the type of person who holds on to ticket stubs and photos and presses flowers but never puts them into a scrapbook I just have them scattered everywhere which brilliantly illustrates how I’m a sentimental piece of shit who can’t put their life together

[basic-banshee]

I keep using my girlfriend with unusual work hours to get out of coworker interactions and happy hours and hanging out.

But now the company holiday party is upon us.

And I’ve been lying about the girlfriend.

I suddenly really empathise with the characters in Hallmark Christmas movies.

[basic-banshee]

I like that people have two reactions to this post.

Reasonable: “just say she couldn’t make it!”

Chaotic: FAKE DATING AU

[victorxaxvale]

Well, which one is it going to be?

[basic-banshee]

And so it begins

[contentcrisis]

having the DMV area Craigslist bookmarked has never come in handy before but now

[basic-banshee]

Update, Craigslist has flagged my post as inappropriate.

[basic-banshee]

Apparently you can’t solicit a date as a “gig”

I now see my mistake

[basic-banshee]

Update: a date has been acquired. This is true lesbian solidarity in action.

[corinnetags]

@earlgreytea68

[earlgreytea68]

lol I CAN’T WAIT TO READ THE ENDING. ;-)

[awed-frog]

flirting in the 21st century

[theweirdwideweb]

[2spleenz]

lost in the sauce