Things

my own original content and ideas

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

*strolls into a brothel and slaps a blockbuster membership card on the front desk* ill have one sex please

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

i dont remember writing this but i just found it and im dying

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

it's 2am. what am i doing with my life?

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

tfw you have depression, but you're trying to act happy, but you feel dead inside so you know you probably look constipated

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

my dogs think they're in a boy band

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

tfw you’re still emotionally traumatized from the last episode but the theme song is a bop 

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

i'm bill nye the science guy and you're watching disney channel

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

Hello darkness my old friend

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

A lonely king presides over his couch kingdom

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

Jessica

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

my dog thinks that this is how to sit

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

this birb is colorful and nature is beautiful

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

I bought some gay mike and ikes.

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

The world is a good place and everything is going to be okay and I'm going to be okay.

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

what is my purpose?

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

why do my dogs look like they belong in an aspca commercial?

[thatoneweirdgiraffe]

Who made this speaker and why?