GERMINATES

We are all yeast m'lady.

[thatsatanicbread]

Ｉ＇Ｍ  ＧＯＩＮＧ  ＴＯＡＳＴ．

[thatsatanicbread]

There is an evil inside you. A young evil. An evil that can be cultured, twisted, and brought to the surface. A naive evil. A musical evil. A handsome evil. A… flamboyant evil.

Beyond that, I have reasons that I would not tell even a close pawn like you. A mere mortal like you would never understand. Obviously.

[geniuspurge-blog]

An evil, huh? Most people can’t take me seriously, let alone see me as evil. What do you see that they don’t?

[He frowned slightly. Purge didn’t like the idea of being a pawn.]

[thatsatanicbread]

They cannot see the evil? Strange. I do. It's pretty evident. It's amazing. And so is that bread company you inherited.

Regardless, I suppose it'd be more fun to possess you on the side rather than full time, as you've already likely experienced. Won't have to use my powers as much that way.

[thatsatanicbread]

Oh, what a pity. It would have been such a loss had they succeeded.

[geniuspurge-blog]

Loss? I still don’t see why the heck you need me anyways…

[thatsatanicbread]

There is an evil inside you. A young evil. An evil that can be cultured, twisted, and brought to the surface. A naive evil. A musical evil. A handsome evil. A... flamboyant evil.

Beyond that, I have reasons that I would not tell even a close pawn like you. A mere mortal like you would never understand. Obviously.

[thatsatanicbread]

Did you not enjoy Limbo? It is a personal favorite realm of mine. Well, not to visit, but to let other people experience anyways. Make any friends there?

[geniuspurge-blog]

Are you kidding? Everything was trying to kill me there!

[thatsatanicbread]

Oh, what a pity. It would have been such a loss had they succeeded.

[thatsatanicbread]

geniuspurge replied to your post: I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONE.

SHIT. NO GET AWAY FROM ME I DON’T WANT TO GO BACK TO LIMBO.

Did you not enjoy Limbo? It is a personal favorite realm of mine. Well, not to visit, but to let other people experience anyways. Make any friends there?

[thatsatanicbread]

I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONE.

ＭＥＡＴ  ＰＵＰＰＥＴ，  Ｉ  ＮＥＶＥＲ  ＬＥＡＶＥ．  ＯＮＬＹ  ＦＡＤＥ  ＴＯ  ＡＮＯＴＨＥＲ  ＰＬＡＮＥ  ＯＦ  ＥＸＩＳＴＥＮＣＥ．  ＦＯＲ  Ａ  ＷＨＩＬＥ．

[bloodeagles]

Jesus Christ, I can see unto the fourth dimension!  I have been given psychic powers and a warm loaf of sourdough.

[thatsatanicbread]

ＢＥＮＥＡＴＨ  ＴＨＥ  ＳＫＩＮ，  ＷＥ  ＡＲＥ  ＡＬＬ  ＲＥＡＤＹ．

[bloodeagles]

Oh god

[thatsatanicbread]

[bloodeagles]

Jesus Christ, I can see unto the fourth dimension!  I have been given psychic powers and a warm loaf of sourdough.

[thatsatanicbread]

ＢＥＮＥＡＴＨ  ＴＨＥ  ＳＫＩＮ，  ＷＥ  ＡＲＥ  ＡＬＬ  ＲＥＡＤＹ．

[2cool4fast]

Bread is vegan.

How the fuck are you talking?

[thatsatanicbread]

You will wish you were dead when I have finished tormenting you.

[As he says this, the breads eyes close. When they reopen, they’re completely white. Not only that, but they glow with a bright, luminous light. The breads unending smiling mouth begins to open wider and wider as it summons powers from beyond.]

[2cool4fast]

… Yeah, uh… while I respect the vegan thing, I don’t think making scrap out of me is the same ideaology.

She didn’t know whether to laugh or turn on her heels and make haste; probably the latter, by the looks of things, but she was being stared down by a loaf of bread. What was she supposed to do?

[thatsatanicbread]

Ｎｅｉｔｈｅｒ  ｉｓ  ｕｓｉｎｇ  ｔｈｅ  ｂｌｏｏｄ  ｏｆ  ｙｏｕｎｇ  ａｎｉｍａｌｓ  ａｓ  ａｎ  ｉｎｇｒｅｄｉｅｎｔ，  ｂｕｔ  ｈｅｙ，  ｙｏｕ  ｗｉｎ  ｓｏｍｅ  ｙｏｕ  ｌｏｓｅ  ｓｏｍｅ．

[The ground beneath Paige begins to groan. Cracks form around certain parts, and dough rises through them. The ceiling follows suit, crumbling as soft, plushy bread squeezes through the holes in the plaster.]

[2cool4fast]

Bread is vegan.

How the fuck are you talking?

[2cool4fast]

I swear to fuck, I didn’t take any drugs.

[thatsatanicbread]

Drugs are not necessary to glimpse into the void of eternity. Only death.

[2cool4fast]

So now I’m dead?

Fuck.

[thatsatanicbread]

You will wish you were dead when I have finished tormenting you.

[As he says this, the breads eyes close. When they reopen, they're completely white. Not only that, but they glow with a bright, luminous light. The breads unending smiling mouth begins to open wider and wider as it summons powers from beyond.]

[redact-a-blog]

[2cool4fast]

Bread is vegan.

How the fuck are you talking?

[thatsatanicbread]

I am an extra-dimensional being possessing the corporeal form of baked dough. The perfect substance.

[2cool4fast]

I swear to fuck, I didn’t take any drugs.

[thatsatanicbread]

Drugs are not necessary to glimpse into the void of eternity. Only death.

[2cool4fast]

Bread is vegan.

How the fuck are you talking?

[thatsatanicbread]

I am an extra-dimensional being possessing the corporeal form of baked dough. The perfect substance.

[geniuspurge-blog]

I can’t believe Purge the Villain is fucking bread.

[thatsatanicbread]

Oh, and I almost forgot… ｔｈｅ  ｂｌｏｏｄ  ｏｆ  ａ  ｔｈｏｕｓａｎｄ  ｓｌａｉｎ  ｌａｍｂｓ．How else will the bread that shall be created and unintentionally consumed be evil?

[geniuspurge-blog]

[After that, Purge slaughtered a thousand lambs. There’s blood everywhere, even on his beautiful clothes. My god.

Anyone who approached him would notice the blood all over him and leave quickly. The flamboyant one has snapped.]

[thatsatanicbread]

Excellent... soon, the evil bread shall be devoured by the dirty leeches that unknowingly seep in the evils of this world, which lay dormant in them, waiting to be awoken. And I, the Almighty Loaf, shall be the one to awaken it, with my yeast spores of doom!

I still have use for you yet. Evil must rise, after all. Next, find the nearest heroes you know. Feed them bread. Yes. Feed them. Good. Gooooood.

[geniuspurge-blog]

thatsatanicbread replied to your post: Go my body, spread the sesame seeds of hate across the land. Fill others with the horrible feelings that one would similarily get from eating too much garlic bread.

Yes… YES… now, poison the water supply… with copious amounts of flour, yeast, and just a pinch of salt.

[Having no control over his body (and no idea what was going on) the possessed rogue did just that. It’s unknown as to how it’ll actually poison people, but whatever.]

[thatsatanicbread]

Oh, and I almost forgot... ｔｈｅ  ｂｌｏｏｄ  ｏｆ  ａ  ｔｈｏｕｓａｎｄ  ｓｌａｉｎ  ｌａｍｂｓ．How else will the bread that shall be created and unintentionally consumed be evil?

[thatsatanicbread]

ＬＥＴ  ＴＨＥ  ＢＲＥＡＤＥＮＩＮＧ  ＢＥＧＩＮ