everything that falls by the wayside

way. 37. nb. bi. 🔞. sideblog.

[the-wayside]

I do multiple things.

The Sign

See my way writes tag.

KinnPorsche

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

90.4k, e, 17/?, mythology + tropes!au. multi-chapter.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

22k, e, 3/5. AU. Alpha/Omega.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

8.6k, e. 1/1. Fem!KP, a kinky feature.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

3.2k, e. one-shot. post-ep 13 au.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

30.3k, e, 3/3, established relationship fluff. post ep 14.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

4.9k, e, 1/1, horny one-shot set after levelling up.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

9.4k, e, post ep 14 slice of horny life.

[Love in the Air, Sky/Prapai] 2.8k, e. post ep 13.

other fics:

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

4.2k, e, of purely indulgent hornee boys but like...romantically (ep 12 fic). one-shot.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[qlfilmnews]

THAILAND | Payback the Series

Airing May 30, 2026 on IQIYI

[the-wayside]

Birthdayed too close to the sun and now my stomach hurts. But if too much cake is the source of all problems, I'll consider myself blessed.

[the-wayside]

For anyone following me for HR content, I've decided to separate out my HR stuff onto main ( @thewaysidedreams ) and keep this sideblog as intended which is a Thai BL blog.

[the-wayside]

Everyone in the hockey world saying that Ilya is cocky and obnoxious, etc. and I see him and I'm like...is he? Or is he just Slavic? Sure he's got a bit of well earned ego but he's upfront and is willing to talk about his success. I wouldn't say that's a bad thing. 🤔

[i-sveikata]

surprised I haven't seen more ppl talking about the montage at the beginning of ep 4 too because yes it is such a masterful way of showing the difference between their day to day lives obvs and how their drives and personalities come about in different ways- party boy ilya and walking advertisement shane sure sure- but its also amazing at showing the slow impact of what their secret relationship/ongoing hook ups is having on them as people too.

Because interspersed throughout these snapshots of shane and ilya training and winning cups and doing commercials, partying etc and just being around friends and family were also seeing that over time they're becoming not as present in their day to day lives anymore because they're too busy texting each other or staring at a screen and waiting for a text from the other person.

Like we see Svetlana having to briefly pull ilyas attention back into the world again when they're out partying and then we immediately see hayden pulling back shanes focus when theyre out running together because the both of them were distracted by their phones. We see ilya shift from kissing women and dancing and drinking and being present to rejecting a woman at the bar when hes sitting down staring at his phone instead (where we also see svetlana clock this straight after) then we shift to hayden glancing at shane whilst hes serving dinner with his family and noticing shane is sitting there too on his phone, checking texts from ilya.

Its such a subtle and interesting way of showing how gradually the stakes are beginning to change over time for them as their feelings deepen and it begins to affect where their attention and focus is. And its not just affecting personal lives too, we see a few commercials with shane where he is engaged and asking questions or looking straight at the camera screen before we shift to the director having to ask for shanes focus when he's looking down and texting during the filming of another commercial- suddenly shane isnt even present when hes supposed to be 'on' and working. And these are the two things theyve just set us up to show as intrinsic parts of their personalities!!!: ilya is the playful, party playboy and shane is the serious, workaholic good boy. But now they're so caught up in each other that neither of them are fully present to enjoy or focus on those things that took up such big space in their lives beforehand.

and even with the casual sounding overlay of music playing throughout the whole montage we are getting a very clear shift from these scenes over time which are saying that its actually not as casual between them anymore as the tone of the song wants us to believe. And the closest people in shane and ilyas lives are starting to notice this!!! so to me the fact that they managed to convey all of that in like the first five mins or so of the episode is kind of wildly impressive.

[triviareads]

the language in some of the posts I'm seeing post-episode 5 is giving me the ick because the second Shane and Ilya don't have onscreen sex, somehow, the romance is BETTER and *more pure*??

Sex was their first means of communication, of expressing their feelings, and it is a form of intimacy too. I love how the show chose to portray Ilya and Shane opening up to one another more explicitly in episode 5 and their emotional intimacy (and because of what they chose to prioritize in this episode, there's no sex, which makes sense because they've only got so much time to work with! And I do think it's a story-telling thing where they're trying to show that Shane and Ilya are entering a new era in their relationship), but can we not.... make it sound like we're *so glad* they've stopped "fucking nasty," and can express their emotions "purely" or some bs?

[the-wayside]

I will fight to the death that they fucked nasty in that hotel room with Shane comforting Ilya. As well as in Ilya's apartment.

I think that Jacob is trying to depict different types of sex and the sex those two points would have been would have been akin to Shane riding Ilya in ep 4. So from that perspective, it isn't strictly adding anything 'new' so got cut.

The glasses sex though. That was an emotional beat which is why it felt sad to lose it but I imagine we will pick it up at the cottage.

I think people want HR to be validated as not smutty media and for the depth of Hollanov's feelings to be the main focus. How deeply they love each other beyond the realms of sex but in trying to conform they lose the essence of Hollanov. Their love encompasses everything.

People attach their hang ups about sex to the things they watch and it's like. No. Break free of that. You can most affectionately blow your other half or ride their d like the electronic bull. You are physically giving yourself to a person when you have sex like what's deeper than that?

And truthfully, it's a bit of internalized homophobia that queer men fucking must mean that no or shallow feelings are involved because some men associate sex with scratching an itch (also valid). But guess what. All those things can be true. But what's true for Hollanov is that they spoke to each other with their bodies before their words and they continue to be hot for each other. They literally never get to see each other they are always raring to go and I love that for them.

[the-wayside]

If anyone is wondering about my Thai shows. I am still watching GBYFD and TI. I had a few disappointments (Wicked Game giving deus ex machina) so I am dialled back and in my reading/HR brain rot era.

[vvivacious101]

on a first-name basis <3

[clarytee]

Is there a resource for the English translation of all of the Russian convos?

My streams don’t have subtitles at all so all I can go off is what I know from gift sets on here and one Reddit thread. Especially in efforts episode five I’m feeling a bit left out 

[the-wayside]

Don't worry, bb. I got you.

The scene between Ilya, Alexei and Svetlana. I made a couple of notes because of the word/pronouns usage on the translation I watched was interesting.

The fight between Ilya and Alexei:

A: stop fucking avoiding me

I: If only

A: So?

I: So what?

Alexei slams Ilya into the wall

I: Don't fucking touch me.

A: then tell me the fucking plan.

I: Jesus Christ. I dont know yet, Alexei, he just died. Can I get a minute to breathe?

A: and me? What about me? Do I get to breathe too? Or is that reserved for rich [f*gg*ts**] who abandon their families?

**It sounds like Alexei says something like пидор (pidor) which can mean the f slur but it can also mean asshole. I think if Alexei really thought Ilya was queer he wouldn't be having this conversation so he likely means asshole.

I: Abandoned? Who's money do you live on. you piece of shit? Who puts food in your mouth and coke up your nose?

A: I have a child, Ilya! And a fucking wife! And me, I've spent the last five months taking care of our dying father every fucking day!

S: I thought I heard singing

A: Great. Now we have to listen go this whore run her mouth.

Ilya shouts and tackles Alexei before hitting him.

S: Stop, Ilya! Stop. He's not worth it. He's not worth anything.

I: (calmer) You can have my apartment. And there will be a trust for my niece. She can have it when she's 18. And you will never, ever contact me again. If you do, I will uaw every bit of my fame and money and notoriety to make sure that you can't show your face in this fucking city without someone wanting to break it open. So take what I offer, shut your fucking mouth and walk away.

Alexei's lip wobbles, he looks at Svetlana (who gives him side eye) as he touches up his appearance and he leaves the room.

S: *comforting Ilya*

I: I don't deserve you.

S: Yes, you do. But you don't want me.

I: You know I love you.

S: I know you do. But it's not the same as it is with Jane, is it? I love you too. And whatever you need, I'll be here. I'm not going anywhere. I just hope Jane knows how lucky he*** is.

Svetlana kisses Ilya goodbye and he shakes his arms out, preparing to go back to the wake.

***So my listening Russian is HELLA rusty but I believe Svetlana is potentially using dative pronouns when referring to "Jane" because I don't hear он/она (he/she). I think she says я просто надеюсь что я не знаю как ему повезло and the dative is "ему/to him".

As always, actual Russians are welcome to correct me. It's been nearly 20 years.

[the-wayside]

Ilya's monologue to Shane.

"I never want to come back here again. I fucking hate it here. And they all fucking hate me. I pay for everything. I make sure everyone has clothes they like. I make sure the food is perfect, that Father is buried next to his parents, that the tomb is perfect. And the only fucking word I ever hear is: I want more, Ilya. I need more, Ilya, more, more, more! I have nothing for these people. I give them everything...but I feel fucking empty. They don't care. They look at me and they see a bank. Or an enemy. Or I don't even know what. My brother--he's always hated me. And I know why, but...it kills me. And it kills me that he took care of my father and I didn't. But I couldn't! I wasn't here. I still paid for it all. And he will never forgive me. For any of it. For existing. And it means. I have no one now. Well, not no one. I have Svetlana. She loves me. And I love her. But not like...Fuck me. But not like I love you. That's the worst fucking part of all this is...that all I want is you. It's always you. I'm so in love you and I don't know what to do about it."

When Shane says I wish you were here, Ilya says, "I wish I was too."

[clarytee]

Is there a resource for the English translation of all of the Russian convos?

My streams don’t have subtitles at all so all I can go off is what I know from gift sets on here and one Reddit thread. Especially in efforts episode five I’m feeling a bit left out 

[the-wayside]

Don't worry, bb. I got you.

The scene between Ilya, Alexei and Svetlana. I made a couple of notes because of the word/pronouns usage on the translation I watched was interesting.

The fight between Ilya and Alexei:

A: stop fucking avoiding me

I: If only

A: So?

I: So what?

Alexei slams Ilya into the wall

I: Don't fucking touch me.

A: then tell me the fucking plan.

I: Jesus Christ. I dont know yet, Alexei, he just died. Can I get a minute to breathe?

A: and me? What about me? Do I get to breathe too? Or is that reserved for rich [f*gg*ts**] who abandon their families?

**It sounds like Alexei says something like пидор (pidor) which can mean the f slur but it can also mean asshole. I think if Alexei really thought Ilya was queer he wouldn't be having this conversation so he likely means asshole.

I: Abandoned? Who's money do you live on. you piece of shit? Who puts food in your mouth and coke up your nose?

A: I have a child, Ilya! And a fucking wife! And me, I've spent the last five months taking care of our dying father every fucking day!

S: I thought I heard singing

A: Great. Now we have to listen go this whore run her mouth.

Ilya shouts and tackles Alexei before hitting him.

S: Stop, Ilya! Stop. He's not worth it. He's not worth anything.

I: (calmer) You can have my apartment. And there will be a trust for my niece. She can have it when she's 18. And you will never, ever contact me again. If you do, I will uaw every bit of my fame and money and notoriety to make sure that you can't show your face in this fucking city without someone wanting to break it open. So take what I offer, shut your fucking mouth and walk away.

Alexei's lip wobbles, he looks at Svetlana (who gives him side eye) as he touches up his appearance and he leaves the room.

S: *comforting Ilya*

I: I don't deserve you.

S: Yes, you do. But you don't want me.

I: You know I love you.

S: I know you do. But it's not the same as it is with Jane, is it? I love you too. And whatever you need, I'll be here. I'm not going anywhere. I just hope Jane knows how lucky he*** is.

Svetlana kisses Ilya goodbye and he shakes his arms out, preparing to go back to the wake.

***So my listening Russian is HELLA rusty but I believe Svetlana is potentially using dative pronouns when referring to "Jane" because I don't hear он/она (he/she). I think she says я просто надеюсь что я не знаю как ему повезло and the dative is "ему/to him".

As always, actual Russians are welcome to correct me. It's been nearly 20 years.

[shnehollander]

Shane and Ilya Heated Rivalry S01E05

[kolaicendionysos]

♫

[the-wayside]

Episode 5 aka when Hollanov confront the baggage making them miserable and the prospect of a relationship impossible even aside from the whole hockey/antiqueer/rivals narrative.

Jacob said they were shooting the show like a super long movie and I hate to be that weird literature nerd but their story feels very Aristotlean (ft. Freytag).

Ep 1 is the exposition of Hollanov, getting our buy in (act 1)

Ep 2 is the rising movement/action (conflict) (feeling feelings but not being able to express them or be real with each other) (Act 2)

Ep 4 the saying of the names is the climax (peak of the story they can't deny) (Act 3)

Ep 5 is the falling action including the catastrophe (grief/pain/injury) (Act 4)

Ep 6 is the resolution (they're gonna be happy) (Act 5)

(I excluded ep 3 as that's Skip's episode and isn't really part of them specifically but it does still fit into the rising action aspect of Ep 2 rather than heading towards the climax of ep 4)

Therefore, in this essay I will--

(Hollanov/HR is a drama worthy of Antiquity)

[the-wayside]

Ilya in the hospital is why Jacob had to let it go from the ice. There is no way his ass wouldn't have been clocked.

And tbh, I've had my seven bells rung and I don't know anyone who has the fortitude to be thinking about stuff like that when it happens.

[the-wayside]

Moonlight sonata playing in the background when Ilya confesses he loves Shane in Russian?

You mean Sonata 14 in C sharp minor, Op 27 no 2 which is about Beethoven's unrequited love?

Outstanding. Standing ovation.

[the-wayside]

God, yes. Go Scott!

I can't explain it but the way that Shane and Ilya's reactions, slowly trying to figure out what was happening, was so queer. Like we all just go on bated breath when one of us wins like this. Is he? Are they? Is it gayyy?