Welcome to the 100 Secret Santa Gift Exchange Project! Look around and come join us for one warm lovely Christmas. All characters and pairings are welcomed and positivity is encouraged. Don't hesitate to ask if you have any questions concerning the exchange and the workings behind it! Read the rules, follow the deadlines and complete your gifts on time. Please consider reading our FAQ before sending us a question you have, as we might have already answered it!
I'm not sure if anyone is checking this blog right now, so I'll try contacting one of the admins next. I was wondering if there were any plans to do this again this year? I had loads of fun last year and I'm really looking forward to doing something like this again. I would be totally willing to help out if the need arises, as well. If not, that's fine! I understand it was stressful!! Thanks for doing it last year :)
Hey, I’m going to answer this publicly in case there are more people wondering the same thing.
First of all, let me say that I’m really happy that you had a blast last year and that we managed to achieve our goal - let people have fun and feel happy and appreciated. We did this for you, the fandom, and you enjoying it and acknowledging that means a lot.
The short answer to your question however is a no, I (and the rest of the team) won’t be hosting a the 100 Secret Santa this year.
The long answer still comes down to a no. Last year, when we finished the exchange, I couldn’t have imagined that there could exist a reason as to why I wouldn’t host this again next (now this) year. But alas, there is such a reason, several in fact. You could say that the fandom as a whole has sucked the magic of the show out of me. I feel disconnected from the show, from the fandom - there was, still is, all this hate and negativity everywhere, this resentment towards people that enjoyed watching the third season, attacks against people that have decided to stop watching it for one reason or another.
The bottom line is that I got sick of it - as a whole the fandom has been jumping from one clusterfuck to another, dramas sprouting left and right, people forever ungrateful for what you do for them in your free time.
You might argue that these are all the more reasons as to why we should do the exchange this winter as well, after all, nothing like some positivity and holiday cheer to remind ourselves why we became enamoured with the show in the first place. And I thought about this, I really did, I made a whole list of pros and cons and tried to convince myself that I should give it a shot, that there were still people left that deserved something nice out of this mess of a fandom.
But I no longer feel like belonging with you guys. I watched the third season mostly through gifs, I witnessed people I knew being run off tumblr/twitter for having different viewpoints. I lost my enthusiasm for the show. I still reblog the occasional edit now and then, still make content once in a while, but I’m happy staying on the fringes, away from the needless hostility. And in the mindset I am right now, I can’t see myself trying to deal with all your different wishes and demands, trying to mediate and please you all while trying to keep myself sane in the process. If I do that, I know that I’ll end up hating the show and the fandom completely and for now, this is something that I’m not okay with.
I’m sorry that this means people like you will be left hanging, I’m sorry because you don’t deserve this, I’m sorry that you were looking forward to this and were let down, I truly am.
But there will be no Secret Santa this year, not from this blog.
Dear secret santas, we hope you’ve had a great time celebrating these past few days, and that the holiday cheer is still making you smile! We had some amazing gifts this year and we’d like to thank every single one of you for participating in this gift exchange and spreading the magic around. The time has come for us to reveal your identities, but before we do that there are few things we want to bring to your attention.
Thank you to the people that pitched in to make a second gift when we asked them if they could lend us a hand (and a shoutout to @fourfinick, @clarkescoleader, @historicbellamyblake, @brollarke and @zooxzoo who weren’t part of the exchange but managed to work their magic at the last possible minute to make up for missing gifts!). Thank you to the people that kept us updated about their url changes. Thank you to the people that informed us on time that they could no longer be a part of the gift exchange. Thank you to the people that were understanding when we had to reassign them a new person.
That said, some of the people that dropped out didn’t get their gifts, while others did. This was mainly due the fact that sometimes reassigning the gifts was impossible because some people pulled out too close to the deadline and we had to shuffle at least 3-4 more gifts and we didn’t want to bring that much chaos into the exchange. We’re sorry if some of you find this unfair but we ask for your understanding concerning the situation.
Those of you that plan on posting your works on AO3 - we have a collection there and we’d love it if you add your work to it! (And if you use ff.net and would like us to make a collection there as well, then we’re open to have one there as well!)
Last, but not least, we have a short survey we’d like you to answer so that when we host the exchange again next year, we do an even better job at it!
Now, onto the secret santas -
the clexa avatar fanfic for @mykabering is a gift from @soofdope
@absolutelythrilling’s bellarke Bonnie and Clyde AU picspam is the work of @rosetyleres
the murphy moodboard for @asterixgazer is a gift from @sleighwaren
@llydiastiles’ silhouette braven gifset is made by @starkru
the bellarke fanfic for @fiction-is-happier is written by @nixandschnitz
@bellarkemas’ singer!clarke dating teacher!bellamy AU gifset is the creation of @heather-rivera
the clexa fanart for @headstrong-heda is the work of @vezarion
the author behind the octavia/raven/clarke friendship fic for @lilypxtter is @blakeswerecoyote
@clarkesbellmy’s on two feet bellarke fanmix is created by @stydiot
@amillion-smiles’ bellamy following clarke off the wrong bus stop fic is written by @5sos-bandcest
the multi-pairing gifset for @sleighwaren is the work of @dreamerjojen
@brave-clarke received a bellarke gifset from @kyngbellamy
the monty graphics for @5sos-bandcest is a gift from @amillion-smiles
the bellarke graphic for @liamsdunsbar is made by @shhadowhunter
the clarke, raven, octavia royalty AU graphic for @lackingstealth is made by @rosetyleres
@jewelleighanna’s water&fire gifset is created by @ughbloodybellamy
the quotes bellarke gifset for @shhadowhunter is the work of @barryalens
@barryalens’ bellarke cookie fic is a gift from @camerongooodkin
@piinkmarbles’ raven poem graphic is a gift from @kingbellamy
the bellamy gifset for @mamamccalls is made by @absolutelythrilling
the clarke graphic @clarkescrusade received is created by @queenrxven
@rosetyleres’ bellarke black&white quote gifset is the work of @clarkesbellmy
@clarkesgriffns’ linctavia fic is written by @taste-of-broken-trust
@nixandschnitz’s murphy graphic is a present from @scottslydias
@kalasgravity bellarke fic is a gift from @bellarkemas
the Dante surrenders Mt Weather AU gifset for @snowflakeswan is a gift from @llydiastiles
the linctavia gifset for @sithfucker is made by @snowoctavia
the bellarke fanmix @queermalvoy received is created by @roctavia
@strictlygoodvi-bes’ minty fic is written by @lindbecks
@saviourblake’s clarke picspam is a gift from @mamamccalls
@stydiot’s bellarke fanfic is a present from @snailsrcool
@heather-rivera’s bellarke fanmix is made by @philomelas
@philomelas’ bellarke graphic is created by @kalasgravity
the octavia graphic for @snowoctavia is by @ohhmissy
the octaven fanart for @mattiemurdoc is the work of @saviourblake
the smutty bellarke fanfic for @kyngbellamy is written by @thatweirdparamedicstudent
@lindbecks’ minty fic is a gift from @fiction-is-happier
@queenrxven’s various characters gifset is the creation of @clarkesgriffns
the soulmark bellarke fic for @irislindas is a gift from @goldenheadfreckledheart
the clexa snowy fic for @ohhmissy is a present from @heartthrob-lexa
@camerongooodkin’s bellarke fic is written by @the-knightmare
@jessicajonec’s bellarke gifset is a gift from @kingbellamy
the murphamy graphic for @dreamerjojen is a present from @sithbellamy
@eliza-clarke’s bellarke fanfic is the work of @clarkescrusade
the wellamy poetry for @sargcrnys is written by @gaytrishwalker
the princess mechanic fic for @soofdope is a present from @kinetic-elaboration
@snailsrcool’s bellarke fanfic is the work of @lilypxtter
the clexa and ranya fic for @heartthrob-lexa is a gift from @kirargent
the bellarke with a side of bravenlarke fic for @scottslydias is written by @jinglebellandclarke
@the-knightmare’s bellarke fanfic is a present from @jibbs-or-gibbs
the fanvideo for @tinselclexa is created by @liamsdunsbar
@taste-of-broken-trust received a minty fanfic from @strictlygoodvi-bes
@jinglebellandclarke’s bellarke fanfic is a gift from @enoughtotemptme
@jibbs-or-gibbs pre-bravenlarke fic is written by @kiraslightning
the author of @sithbellamy’s bellarke fanfic is @biclexaualblake
@biclexaualblake’s bellamy, raven and clarke fanart is created by @asterixgazer
the clexa fanfic for @kiraslightning is a present from @tinselclexa
@ughbloodybellamy’s bellarke gifset is made by @brave-clarke
@kinetic-elaboration‘s bellarke fanfic is written by @snowflakeswan
@thatweirdparamedicstudent‘s bellarke gifset is the work of @brollarke
the various ladies gifset for @starkru is created by @clarkesbellmy
the bellarke gifset for @goldenheadfreckledheart is a gift from @kingbellamy
the bellarke fanfic for @enoughtotemptme is a present from @eliza-clarke
the nathan gifset for @blakeswerecoyote is the work of @fourfinick
the braven playlist for @gaytrishwalker is a gift from @philomelas
@kirargent raven graphic is made by @jessicajonec
@vezarion‘s braven gifset is a gift from @clarkescoleader
@roctavia‘s smutty bellarke fanfic is a present from @historicbellamyblake
@kingmontygreen‘s bellarke ‘true north’ gifset is the work of @zooxzoo
This was the very first exchange I've been a part of and I've got to say it has been a wonderful experience. It's so awesome that you guys decided to spread love and happiness with all of the hatred going around the fandom lately. I'm definitely participating next year. Happy Holidays!
We'll be happy to have you again next year! Merry Christmas!
Hey there just wanted to say thanks for hosting the secret Santa event this year again this is such a lovely idea to spread love, it warms my heart. You guys are all wonderful thanks for your hard work! This is so amazing xox
Thank you as well for participating and giving a meaning to all of our hard work, it was truly a pleasure :)
And with that last gifset this year’s The 100 Secret Santa Gift Exchange Project is over! If you haven’t seen your gift go back through our posts and you’ll find it as tumblr didn’t let us @ some people. We had amazing gifts and participants this year, and, despite few hiccups, we would like to think that we did a good job, and you all had fun creating and receiving your gifts!
We’ll take one day off to rest and put our masterlist together, and on the 27th of December (Sunday) we’ll post it and reveal your identities. (If you plan to reblog the gifts you’ve created to your own blogs don’t forget to skip the ‘mine’- variation tags for now!)
Once again, thank you for being a vital part of this and happy holidays!
Summary: Clarke and Bellamy are convinced that they can keep up their mutually beneficial arrangement throughout the holiday season. Christmas proves them wrong.
A/N: mature rating, smut, language, modern au, friends with benefits, friends with benefits to lovers
The taste of sweet wine lingered on Clarke’s tongue as she stared out at the cityscape beyond the hotel window. Snow covered the streets and topped the buildings, blanketing almost everything and showing no signs of stopping. As much as she liked it, Clarke was glad to be inside instead of out in the cold. The feeling increased tenfold when two arms slid around her waist and enveloped her in a warm embrace.
She leaned back into him without hesitation. From the hotel room window, they could see the brightly-lit Christmas tree standing proudly in Rockefeller square and the flashing billboards of Times Square. If she looked closely, she could see a building with her last name printed on the side. Clarke didn’t look closely. She wasn’t here to admire the view. Turning in his arms, she looked up into his eyes.
The dim light of the room sharpened the angles of his face even more than usual. She reached up, brushing her thumb over his high cheekbone. Bellamy leaned his face into the touch, his eyelids fluttering and his arm wrapping around her waist. They knew not to waste any time. Bellamy began walking backwards, leading them both to the large bed in the center of the room.
Clarke shed her blazer and kicked off her heels, reaching up to pull her hair out of the clip that held it off her neck. Her hair didn’t even unfurl from the twist before Bellamy had his hands buried in it. She smiled at that. He loved curling his fingers through her soft curls almost more than he loved kissing her. Almost. She hummed as his lips touched to hers, tugging his shirt out of his pants and unbuttoning it with the ease of experience.
As soon as the dark grey shirt fluttered to the ground, she pushed him back on the bed and reached back to unzip her dress. Bellamy landed on his elbows and gazed up at her, his pupils blown wide with desire as she slid it down and let it drop where she stood. Running a hand through her hair, she smiled down at him.
Bellamy sat up as she climbed on the bed, splaying his hands over her back and pressing his mouth to her abdomen. Clarke tilted her head back with a sigh as he trailed kisses around her navel and nibbled lightly at the skin above the waistband of her dark blue lace underwear. She shivered at the feeling, sliding her hands into his hair.
Tugging at the dark locks, she tilted his head backwards and stared down at him. She made sure that he was staring into her eyes as she reached up and unhooked her bra, letting it fall down her arms and tossing it away. A groan escaped his mouth as she brushed her hands over her breasts, plucking at her nipples with her fingers.
“Clarke,” Bellamy sighed, breaking the spell of silence that had reigned between them since they stepped foot into the hotel room.
She lowered herself down to straddle his lap, feeling his excitement press against her core. Pushing him back to lie down again, Clarke raked her nails lightly from collarbone to waist, leaving light red marks in her path. Bellamy hissed at the feeling, his hands curling in the covers beneath him and his head tilting backwards. Clarke bent down, pressing her chest to his and putting her lips at his ear.
“Fuck me,” she whispered, nipping at his earlobe and grinning at his answering moan.
Bellamy flipped them over without a moment’s hesitation, settling in the cradle of her hips and capturing her lips in a kiss. It wasn’t sweet this time, passion and desire fueling the feverish embrace. Clarke arched her back as he dipped his head down and began pressing soft, open-mouthed kisses to her skin, making her sigh and dig her fingers into his shoulders.
“Bellamy,” she said in a low voice, almost warning him.
She felt his smile against her collarbone but he didn’t stop, determined to tease her to madness. One of his hands slid up her waist and cupped her breast as his mouth hovered over her nipple, blowing on it lightly. Clarke inhaled sharply at the feeling but it was nothing compared to her cry when his lips closed around her nipple and his tongue flicked over it.
Bellamy didn’t relent, tugging lightly with his teeth and swirling his tongue over the hardened peak as he rolled the other between the rough pads of his finger and thumb. He let out a vibrating chuckle as her legs clamped around his hips and her hips rocked against his, desperate for friction between her thighs.
“I’m taking my time here babe,” he told her, stilling her body with his hands on her hips.
“For now,” Clarke said with a wicked grin, knowing that it wouldn’t take much to convince him to move a bit faster.
They knew each other’s bodies inside and out. She could easily touch him here or kiss him there and he would be putty in her hands. But Clarke let him take his time, settling back on the bed and submitting to his attentions. Her arms drifted over her head as he kissed lower and lower, leaving behind cool spots where his lips and even tongue swiped over her skin. When his fingers hooked in her panties, she couldn’t quiet the slight ‘yes’ that came out in a huff.
Clarke lifted her hips helpfully and shuddered with anticipation as he pulled them down her legs and tossed them away. Dropping back down, he hooked one of her legs over his shoulder and touched his fingers to her wet folds. She was so unbelievably aroused that foreplay almost wasn’t necessary. But Clarke wasn’t about to deny herself this particular pleasure.
Bellamy dragged his thumb up the length of her, tracing her folds and avoiding her swollen clit purposefully. She knew better than to show him any evidence of her frustration. If he saw her desperation, he would drag it out even more. When one finger teased at her entrance, Clarke pressed her lips together and muffled her moan once it slid in slowly. Bellamy quickly joined it with another, pushing them in and out slowly.
When his thumb finally pressed to her clit, Clarke’s toes curled and her sharp cry filled the room. Bellamy continued his torture, his fingers filling her as he rubbed her sweet spot in slow, deliberate circles. He knew what she was waiting for, knew that Clarke would grit her teeth and silence herself before begging for anything. Luckily he didn’t have quite the self-control that she did.
As soon as the tip of his tongue touched her clit, her hips lifted and she dug her heel into his back. Bellamy hummed lightly, amused at her reaction as he curled his fingers inside of her and began flicking his tongue over her clit relentlessly. Clarke let out a string of curses along with his name, the filthy words spurring him on. It didn’t take long for her orgasm to build, her lower stomach coiling tightly and her moans becoming feverish and desperate.
Her skin was already shining with a light sheen of sweat, the previously enjoyable warmth of the room contributing to her heated state. Bellamy knew she was close, quickening his movements until she was shouting his name at the ceiling and bucking beneath his mouth and fingers. He didn’t stop until she was pushing him away, too sensitive for anymore stimulation. Her chest heaved and she splayed across the bed as he sat back on his heels and wiped his mouth.
“You good?” Bellamy said, a self-satisfied grin on his lips.
Clarke laughed, reaching up to pull him down for a kiss. The taste of herself on his tongue only renewed her desire and she quickly found herself fumbling with his belt and shoving his pants down. Bellamy helped her, kicking them off and shedding his boxers as well. As soon as he was naked, she flipped them over and straddled him again, wasting no time. He let out a strained gasp when her hand wrapped around him, stroking slowly.
“There’s not much time,” she said quietly.
Bellamy hushed her, his hands running over her thighs and ass. He tugged her forward, rocking her hips against his and groaning at the friction. Clarke couldn’t wait a moment longer, reaching over for the condom that he had sitting on the bedside table. She rolled it on carefully before straddling him again, sinking down on him slowly. They both took a moment once he filled her completely, their breathing in sync and their eyes locked on the other.
When Bellamy reached up and tangled his fingers in her hair, she let him tug her down and kissed him deeply, her body aching for movement. He let out a noise of complaint when she pulled away but his disappointment quickly turned to pleasure when she began rocking and grinding against him, her hands braced on his chest and her teeth biting into her lower lip. His hands went to her hips and guided her movements as he met her movements with thrusts of his own.
Clarke could see from his eyes that he wasn’t going to last long. They’d both waited too long for this with their combined busy schedules. The first touch of her fingers to her clit proved that she was still too sensitive. One orgasm was enough for her that night. Bellamy didn’t give her a chance to recover her rhythm, flipping them over and hitching her legs around his waist.
She stroked his back and whispered encouragements into his ear as he chased his orgasm. Bellamy let out a choked moan and buried his face in the crook of her neck, his breaths coming out in harsh gasps and his pace slowing until he finally stopped. Neither of them moved for several moments, catching their breath and letting their bodies cool down.
When they finally did move, Clarke situated herself on a pillow and Bellamy discarded the condom before dropping on the bed beside her. She laid there staring at the freckles that dotted his shoulder as he played with her hair and traced circles on her skin, leaving goosebumps in the wake of his touch.
“Clarke,” Bellamy said, breaking the silence between them.
She looked into his eyes and saw them filled with emotion. The feelings that were there didn’t fit into her neat box of what this was supposed to be. As tempting as it was to see where it led them, she took the coward’s way out like she always did, sitting up with a sigh of his name.
“Don’t,” Clarke said, shrugging off his hand and standing up to gather her clothing.
“We have to talk about this,” Bellamy said, watching her dress as quickly as she could.
“No we really don’t,” she denied, twisting her hair up into the clip once more. “I have a dinner.”
They both knew that she didn’t.
“Things have changed,” he told her.
The earnest look in his eyes almost pulled her back to his arms. But she remembered why they started this in the first place. No strings attached. No feelings. Just sex. That’s how it had to be, no matter how much she wanted to have the cuddling and everything else that came with a real relationship.
“I haven’t,” she lied, pulling her coat on.
“Clarke,” Bellamy said, reaching out towards her.
She didn’t struggle as he pulled her closer, unable to resist his thrall.
“We can’t, Bellamy,” Clarke whispered even as she curled her fingers in his hair and cradled his head to her abdomen.
She let the embrace go on for a few moments longer before bending down to kiss him softly and pulling away. His eyes were heavy on her as she walked away. Once she was out in the hallway, Clarke leaned against the door with a heavy sigh. This was how it had to be…right?
“You’re coming aren’t you?”
Clarke answered Raven’s question with silence, unsure of how to answer that without spilling each and every reason why going to a Christmas party with all of her friends was a terrible idea. Luckily they were on the phone so her best friend couldn’t see the deer in the headlights look that she was currently wearing.
“Clarke?” Raven said, her suspicions rising.
“I might be working that night,” she mumbled, tugging at her wrinkled scrub top.
“Bullshit. I was there when you asked off,” she said, her annoyance coming across even over the phone. “What’s going on?”
She would rather not have this conversation in the middle of her third night shift of the week but Clarke knew that there was no avoiding it at this point.
“I’m just not feeling the Christmas spirit,” she shrugged, avoiding the real reason.
“Is this cause you and Bellamy are screwing around?” Raven asked, skipping the bullshit.
Clarke might have been surprised if it was anyone but Raven, who was the most observant person she knew.
“We had a weird night a few days ago,” she admitted.
“You two could talk it through.”
She grimaced at the suggestion. Talking wasn’t always her strong suit when it came to Bellamy. As she proved in the hotel room, it was easier to fuck and run.
“I’ll try to make an appearance,” Clarke said, hoping it would change the subject.
“Wear the blue dress you got last week. He’ll love it,” Raven said before hanging up.
She let out a heavy sigh, slipping her phone back into the pocket of her white coat and leaning back against the counter of the nurse’s station.
“Fuck,” Clarke said, shaking her head.
The party was in full swing by the time she got there, conversation drowning out the soft music that was playing. After greeting Monty and Miller, who were hosting the part, Clarke began to make her way towards the bar. Unfortunately, the sight of Bellamy leaning against the wall stopped her short. He wore a slate grey button down, black slacks, and an easy smile that faltered when he caught sight of her.
She turned around quickly, her eyes searching the crowd for anyone who would give her an out from this conversation. Unfortunately before she could, his hand closed around her wrist and he pulled her around to face him. HIs eyes pleaded with her before he ever said a word.
“Let’s talk,” Bellamy said.
Clarke couldn’t bring herself to do anything but nod. He deserved that much from her at the very least. No one hindered them as they headed down the hall to the bathroom, Bellamy locking the door once they were in the room. When he turned to face her, his hands were in his pockets and there was a hesitant look on his face.
“I’m sorry about the other night,” Clarke blurted, wanting to get it off her chest. “You deserved better than that.”
Bellamy simply smiled, stepping closer to her.
“Do you remember when we started all this?” he asked.
Clarke couldn’t help but let out a laugh.
“How could I forget? I still don’t think I got all that tequila out of my system,” she said, leaning back against the counter.
He nodded in agreement but she could see that he was preparing to say something.
“You were so beautiful that night,” Bellamy said softly, reaching out to tuck a loose curl behind her ear. “That’s when I figured out I love you.”
Clarke’s heart skipped a beat and she couldn’t quite believe what she just heard.
“Bellamy,” she breathed, tilting her head to the side slightly.
“I didn’t tell you. I knew you weren’t ready,” he said, brushing his thumb over her cheek. “Honestly I don’t even know if you’re ready now. This is the most terrifying thing I’ve ever done.”
Clarke stared into his eyes, wondering how she managed to be anything close to good enough for this man to fall for her. Before she could say a word, he pulled something out of his pocket with his other hand. Her eyes flickered away from his face and she gasped when she saw the delicate silver chain with a small sapphire pendant hanging from it.
“It’s beautiful Bellamy,” she said, reaching out to touch the necklace.
“I had some help picking it out,” he admitted.
“Raven,” Clarke realized, knowing now why she was wearing the blue dress.
Bellamy nodded, turning her around to place it around her neck. She didn’t argue, lifting her hair up so that he could clasp the necklace. Then his lips dropped to her shoulder and his arms encircled her waist.
“I love you, Clarke Griffin,” Bellamy murmured.
She sighed at the words, letting her head fall back and her eyes close.
“I don’t expect for you to say it back. All I want is for you to give this…us…a chance. Let me take you to an actual restaurant. Let’s try to be more than just hotel rooms and quickies in the closet.”
Clarke felt fear overtaking her, battling the desire to say yes a thousand times.
“I don’t want to lose you,” she told him.
“I know,” Bellamy sighed, holding her closer. “But I don’t want to live the rest of my life wondering what could’ve been if we’d only stopped being so scared.”
She knew that he was right. There was a decision to make. If she left that bathroom alone, it was over. That was much more terrifying than the alternative. Turning around in his arms, she looked up at him and took a deep breath.
“Let’s start now,” Clarke said, laying her hand over his cheek.
Bellamy stared at her for several moments, clearly trying to figure out if she was serious. Then a smile broke out over his face and he pressed closer to her, winding his hand through her carefully styled hair without caring whether he messed it up. Clarke hardly had time to protest, his lips covering hers in a passionate kiss. Her arms wound around his shoulders and, as she lost herself in the embrace, she knew that this was exactly where she belonged.
“Merry Christmas,” she said, pulling away to look in his eyes.
He grinned down at her, earning an equally bright smile in return.
A/N: Hi Emileigh! So this is your Bellarke Fanfic gift. I hope you like Modern AUs. It’s nothing ground breaking, but I enjoyed writing it and I hope you enjoy reading it! Merry Christmas! Love Santa xxx
It is definitely possible, that Bellamy has had more to drink than he intended to. Nobody wants to be that guy at an office Christmas party, and given his extremely lax brain to mouth filter when drunk, he especially, especially did not. But, he thinks he might have left that behind several drinks ago. Maybe three or four, but it all gets a bit hazy after number five. He should definitely stop drinking.
“What I'm saying,” Murphy is saying to him, “is that you should definitely do it.” Honestly, Bellamy has no idea what it is that he should definitely be doing; he tries not to listen to Murphy at the best of times really (he is an absolute dick of a co-worker) and he is having trouble focusing on anything right now. He thinks they might have been talking about Jasper? Maybe? Oh shit, he hopes they weren’t talking about Clarke.
Speaking of, where is Clarke? Just because he was planning to avoid her tonight, didn’t mean that he didn’t want to see her. He always wants to see Clarke. Not like, in a creepy way. Just in that, she is very attractive, and he likes to admire her. From a distance.
Oh God, Bellamy is so creepy. And so so fucked. In Bellamy’s defence, he is forced to keep his distance from Clarke not because he is actually like, an actual stalker, but because to the rest of the office, including Clarke, they definitely hate each other. And Bellamy is definitely in love with her. So. Fucked.
“Where's Clarke?” he says, without actually meaning to. Woops. It’s ok. He can play it off. “I mean, I’ve like...said hi to everyone other than her tonight. I should say hi to Clarke, right?”
Murphy is blinking at him. He looks a bit like an owl. Heh. Oh shit, he’s speaking. Focus. “Why would you want to find Clarke? I didn’t think you guys could say hi to each other without, you know, a 15 minute argument about whether ‘hi’ is a respectful enough greeting for a co-worker.’
Luckily, part of the reason that Bellamy hates Murphy is that he is a giant asshole who doesn't actually care about anyone other than himself.
“Whatever,” he huffs, rolling his eyes, “I saw her go out on to the balcony ages ago. Go knock yourself out man, I don’t really give a shit.”
At this point, Bellamy is not really trusting himself to speak. So he just smiles and nods at Murphy, and stumbles off. He is also sure that going to talk to Clarke in his current state is not a good idea. It is a horrible idea. It is the worst idea. And yet. His legs are moving towards the balcony. This is a thing. That is happening.
Bellamy has been in love with Clarke for a long time. When she started at Jaha Inc., appointed by her best friend's father, he thought she was entitled, spoiled, and sure to be useless. He can easily admit now that he was projecting his own issues onto her, he had to fight tooth and nail to get his own position after dropping out of college in his somophore year to take custody of and support his baby sister, and seeing someone glide in so easily definitely rankled him. It wasn’t her fault as such. But the fact remains that he was incredibly hostile to Clarke from day one. What he wasn’t expecting, was for her to give as good as she got. She never gave him an inch, and proved herself to him over and over, and their clashes grew to be legendary. And, eventually, he began to fall, getting deeper and deeper every day. By that time though, Clarke was already going out of her own way to spite him, so it was just easier not to adjust his attitude towards her noticeably. At least this way she speaks to him.
Yikes. He’s sliding open the balcony door. Clarke’s hair is shining in the light escaping from the party. He has no idea what he’s intending to do right now, but his heart is pounding, and his mouth is dry.
Clarke turns. “Oh,” she sounds unimpressed. “It’s you.”
Bellamy’s nervous system is in over drive. His head is spinning. “It’s...me?”
Clarke raises one eyebrow. God, he is so in love with her. “Did you come out here to be sick? You look like you’re about to be sick.”
“No I’m...I think I’m in love with you? No, actually I don’t think it, I know it, but obviously, um...”
Clarke bursts out laughing. Ok, he had probably acknowledge that this was a possibility, but he would almost have preferred outright revulsion. Maybe.
“How much have you had to drink?” Clarke finally manages.
“Um, a lot. But like, I don’t know I’m in love with you because I’m drunk. I knew any way. I just never would have told you sober. Which, I am really honestly regretting right now. So, I will just go back into the party and we will forget that that this ever happened.” He nods. He has got this, this is fine. “Ok, cool, bye Clarke.
“No, no Bellamy wait!” Clarke yells at him.
He doesn’t need Clarke to be nice to him now. “Honestly Clarke, it’s fine, I’m drunk, can we please just let this go?”
“Oh God, Bellamy, how can you still be this dense?” Clarke sounds on the verge of laughter again. “I'm not laughing at you because you’re in love with me, it’s just that it’s...so funny!”
Bellamy is lost. And he does not want to be a part of this conversation. “Um, why?”
Clarke does laugh this time. “Because, Bellamy, I’ve been attracted to you since before you ever spoke to me! But you hated me, so I had to act like I hated me too!”
Now Bellamy is blinking like an owl. A suspicious owl. “Are you drunk?”
“No! At least, not as much as you! And if your love confession is allowed to be valid, then mine must be too!”
Ok, so. Bellamy is not as much of a disaster as he thought. He feels his grin spreading. This may be the best moment of his life. Maybe.
“Are we too drunk to kiss?’ he manages eventually.
Clarke’s blinding grin is matching his own. “You should maybe come home with me and sober up first. To be safe.”
“Ok.” Clarke is actually holding his hand. And leading him out of the party. She’s in love with him. Holy shit. Best. Moment. Of his life.
It turns out that the actual best moment of Bellamy’s life, is the moment that Clarke gives him their twins to hold for the first time.
Summary: “Screw it, she thinks and crashes her lips against his. It’s awkward at first – her nose bumps his and the angle is all off, but then his hands are on her cheeks and he guides her so it’s just right. Perfect, actually. And now she’s wondering why they hell they haven’t done this before.” aka Bellarke + Christmas tree
A/N: Merry Christmas, Julia! Hope your day is filled with love, joy and peace.
“Tell me again why I have to spend Christmas Eve with your brother?”
“Because he’s brooding and you’re brooding.”
“I am not brooding,” Clarke complains as she passes the marshmallows over to Octavia.
“You are. You have been ever since-”
“Lexa,” she finishes. And okay, maybe she has been brooding – a little – but it’s not because she hasn’t moved on. Because she has. “It’s not that, O. I was supposed to spend Christmas with her parents and yeah, I don’t really want to go back home to my mom gloating that she was right about our relationship, you know.”
“Which I totally get. But I don’t wait either of you to be alone on Christmas,” she pauses and takes a sip of her hot chocolate. “And he’s your friend, so do it for him.”
Bellamy is her friend. One of her best-friends, actually. They may not have what some people call a ‘normal’ friendship, but for them, it works. “This has nothing to do with the fact you feel guilty leaving him alone for Christmas to visit Lincoln’s family?”
Octavia scrunches up her nose. “Maybe a little.”
“Fine.” Clarke rolls her eyes, picks up her mug and heads to the sink.
“Oh and Clarke?”
“Hmm.”
“He doesn’t have a Christmas tree.”
It takes Clarke around twenty minutes to squeeze the Christmas tree into the elevator while the doorman watches her in amusement - jerk. Honestly, if she wasn’t so stubborn she would have just trudged up the stairs - it probably would have saved her a lot of time, but alas.
The elevator stops and Clarke wipes the sweat off her forehead with the back of her hand, before she pulls the tree out of the elevator – with immense difficulty – and begins to drag it down the hall.
She’s sweating and she’s also pretty sure her arms about to fall off, so excuse her if she’s cursing out loud.
The older woman across from Bellamy’s apartment pops her head of her door. “Clarke? Are you okay, dear?”
It takes her a moment but she realises the woman’s the one who bakes Bellamy cookies all the time. “Hey, Mrs Burgees. I’m fine, just bringing Bellamy his Christmas tree.”
“Oh.” The woman smiles sweetly at her. “I’m glad to hear that, it wasn’t very christmasy when I was over there earlier. There’s some fresh gingerbread men on the table. Don’t let them go to waste!”
“Great.” Her mouth almost waters. “Of course not, I’ll make sure of that. Merry Christmas!”
“And you, dear!”
Clarke pulls Bellamy’s key out - the one she’s pretty sure stole a few months back - from her front pocket and unlocks the door, using her foot to swing the door open. “Bellamy!” she shouts.
Not even a second later he appears in front of her - he’s shirtless and his hairs wet. And in her defence, she tries really really hard to not stare at his bare chest, but she’s only human, so.
“Clarke…” he frowns. “What are you doing here? Are you okay?”
She’s just about to answer him when he glances behind her and notices the tree. “Is that a Christmas tree?”
“Um. Yeah. I thought since we both have no plans for christmas we could decorate the tree and watch movies and get drunk, or something.” She ponders for a moment. “I don’t know.”
He seems to consider it, then nods. “Octavia put you up to this.”
“What? No. Of course not.” She tries to laugh it off – waving a hand in front of her. But he’s not buying it and she knows it. “Okay. Fine. She did, but this is as much for me as it is for you.”
“Put the tree up in the corner then. I’ll just go and put a shirt on,” he strides off towards his bedroom and she really wants to kick him or something.
“You could have at least pulled the tree in for me, asshat!”
He returns a few minutes later, with a shirt on and Clarke’s not sure if that’s disappointment she feels. “You,” she says breathlessly. “Can lift it up.”
“Why aren’t you home for Christmas?” He asks her, leaning down to pick up the tree.
Clarke shrugs her jacket off. “Well, I was supposed to be at Lexa’s and I really didn’t want to have that “I told you so” conversation with my mom, so I never told her we broke up. Where are your decorations?”
“In the cupboard next to the door. At the back.”
She pads over to collect the decorations and puts them on the floor next to the tree – reaching into the box to grab the lights. “Why are you alone at Christmas?”
He growls. “You know why.”
“Hmm. I know that Octavia invited you to Lincoln’s, but you were too stubborn to accept.”
Bellamy sighs. “We put up the tree, we bake, we watch movies and then on Christmas day we open our presents and eat as much chocolate as we can before we stuff our faces with mac n cheese. It might not be the traditional way to celebrate it, but it’s our way. And she’s not here.”
“Sometimes things change.” She shrugs. “Maybe we could do it together instead. Or, make our own tradition?”
“Yeah, yeah. I’d like that.”
While untangling the lights they had been getting on really well, so it didn’t surprise her when things turned into some weird argument and top and bottom.
“So we’ll start from the top,” Clarke explains.
“No, everyone always starts from the bottom.”
“Top.”
“Bottom.”
He’s infuriating. “For god sake Bellamy. Stop being awkward. I’m starting from the top.”
“Well I’m starting from the bottom.” He’s smirking and it’s only making her angrier.
“Fine.”
“Fine.”
“Fine.”
Clarke’s pretty sure this isn’t going to work, but there’s no way she’s letting him win this one, so she grabs the stepping box and starts from the top.
She only manages to wrap the lights round the tree three times when there’s a crashing noise and she looks down at Bellamy – who’s currently flat on the floor with lights bundled at his feet – when she realises it’s definitely not working.
If she was a better person she’d probably not laugh, but she’s not and it’s really funny.
“Are you done?” Bellamy asks when her laughter subsides.
She has to bite her tongue. “How the hell did you end up on the floor?”
There’s a crease in his forehead. It’s cute, actually. “I told you going from the top wouldn’t work. You pulled the lights and they were around my feet.”
Clarke literally chokes on her laughter, then feels bad so she steps down to offer him her hand, but Bellamy’s an asshole and she should have known. He pulls her down and she falls on top off him. “Ugh! You’re a jerk.”
His chest shakes under her with laughter. “I’ve been called worse, but it was worth it.”
She hums and lifts her head from his chest, her eyes catching his lips – soft, warm, inviting.
I’m glad you came,” he whispers so low that if she hadn’t been watching his lips move she might not be sure he even said anything.
She drags her eyes from his lips to his eyes. “Me too.”
Screw it, she thinks and crashes her lips against his. It’s awkward at first – her nose bumps his and the angle is all off, but then his hands are on her cheeks and he guides her so it’s just right. Perfect, actually. And now she’s wondering why they hell they haven’t done this before.
It’s short and sweet, but exactly what she needs. And when they pull away he has the biggest smile she’s ever seen and she’s almost positive she has one too. “Want to go stuff our faces with the gingerbread men?”
He laughs lightly. “Sure. I’ll warm up some milk.”
And that’s when her heart melts a little, because seriously. She leans down and gives him a small kiss on the corner of his mouth, before she rolls off him and stands.
This time when she offers him her hand, he lets her pull him up.
king & lionheart | of monsters and men; start of time | gabrielle aplin; this love | taylor swift; gravity | alex & sierra; young blood | bea miller; can’t help falling in love | elvis presley; heaven sent | front porch step; fire n gold | bea miller; amazed | lonestar; halo | the scenic; top of the world | greek fire
