[looking at people younger than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at people older than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at myself] its over
Three Goblin Art
Not today Justin
occasionally subtle

Origami Around
wallacepolsom

oozey mess
Xuebing Du

if i look back, i am lost
Show & Tell

roma★

★
ojovivo

blake kathryn
Monterey Bay Aquarium
dirt enthusiast

Andulka
Sade Olutola
One Nice Bug Per Day
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

@theartofmadeline

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@theartoftenderwords
[looking at people younger than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at people older than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at myself] its over
Welcome to being an adult! Featuring such injury causing events as
- sneezed wrong
- turned your neck a little too fast
- slept weird
- took the trash out to the curb and stepped at a slightly different angle than usual
- breathed
- failed to breathe properly
- breathed in the wrong stuff. Allergy time
- looked too hard at something too far away
- knees
"this too shall pass" sure but have you considered the fact that i don't like the way it's passing
”there’s no glory in suffering” and “sometimes the effort is the point” are two ideas that co-exist but god damn if I can ever tell when’s the time for which
“I don’t like this song because I can’t relate to it” skill issue. I’m mad at my husband I love my girlfriend I’m a lone cowboy I’m growing old I’m growing up I’m depressed I love my friends I’m perpetually horny I’m drunk at the club I love my husband again
this is exactly what I’m talking about
Debating silently showing this to one of the flight attendants while boarding
I SHOWED IT TO MY FLIGHT ATTENDANT WHEN HE GAVE ME MY COOKIES AND HE LAUGHED SO HARD HE TOOK MY PHONE TO SHOW IT TO THE OTHER FLIGHT ATTENDANT
I don’t know how you got a good grade in being a passenger on an airline but that’s a totally normal thing to achieve and I’m not seething with jealousy at all.
i wish you could laugh react eBay listings. that's not worth $250. you fucking asshole. lmao
you should also be able to do this to job listings
“scientists don’t want you know” is a phrase that always cracks me up because if you actually meet a scientist they will be shaking and crying like an overstimulated chihuahua with the need to let you know
how many sharks does a tornado need to be considered a sharknado
1
2
3-5
10 ????
more ??????
other ????????????
this is the level of analysis we’re looking for here people
A common theme in science fiction is that if you're in space, don't trust a corporation. And Earth is in space
fucked that you can’t fix other people especially when you really care about them. Oh so im just supposed to be there for you while you suffer. like a useless cunt gargoyle
The thing about how you will talk like a tumblr user for the rest of your life is that usually people won’t clock it but sometimes you’ll meet someone and you’ll actually be able to see a look of painful recognition in their eyes when you say some tumblypoo bullshit while everyone else just thinks you had an epic original thought. And it’s gonna make you a little bit sorry you were born
um. cut him in half
hot dog or hamburger style, boss
I think it would be funny to write a murder mystery where not only did every single character involved have an obvious motive to kill this mf, they were actually all attempting to murder him first, but the murder attempts all cancelled each other out all except for one. Two people tried to poison him but the poisons just happen to work as antidotes for each other, and instead of killing him only gave him the shits, and due to having the shits he couldn't go hunting that day like he had planned, foiling the plans of the one who had conditioned his favourite hunting horse to panic and bolt at the cue of a whistle, and the other murder attempt of tampering with his gun so that it would have exploded his whole face off.
The whole mystery isn't about who could have done it or how, but who was the one who got lucky and actually succeeded.
"If you accept any food from the fae, they shall never let you go" is a human belief. The fair folk stand by the principle that if you feed 'em, you gotta keep 'em. If wildlife learns to rely on you for food, you have already fucked up, and you can't just stop feeding them cold turkey. That human is your responsibility now. Because you left your peach cobbler unsupervised.
yesterday my uber driver told me he stopped wearing glasses and just decided his eyes were better and I was like man as the passenger in this elantra I would like you to keep more secrets from me