i ended up going to the partial hospitalization program because it got really bad. im here until next friday, two weeks total. preparing for leave from work was stressful and the first few days out were hard bc work was the only thing keeping me going. but the program so far is helpful, it's like a little group where we learn skills. the psych i met with was horrible but i told the staff that i wasnt confortable with him and they let me meet with a woman who was better. I came in knowing that my medication needs to change but I'm opposed to the one they are recommending for me here. I'm allowed to make my own decision about it but im nervous to push back, i will anyways. she wants me to add abilify but Im only comfortable taking an ssri so im just going to ask to switch from prozac to zoloft. and if that ends up being a bad idea at least it was my decision. it's been weird not having things to stress about in the evening, like things that went poorly at work, things i didnt finish, how the next day is going to go, etc. and ive been feeling nervous about what it will be like going back to work. but at the same time i just want to get it over with and have things to do again. im not sure. im not going to stay at this school next year so i kind of just want to get it over with.
