Don't be shy, you're making me embarrassed too
We're all on the simp train today! I can't even!
Keni
No title available
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
hello vonnie
The Bowery Presents

bliss lane

izzy's playlists!
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ

Origami Around

pixel skylines
No title available
Not today Justin
Sade Olutola

No title available

Andulka
Color Me Curious
Cosimo Galluzzi
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

shark vs the universe

seen from United States

seen from Vietnam
seen from India
seen from Ukraine

seen from Singapore

seen from Malaysia

seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from Netherlands
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from Honduras
seen from United States

seen from Kazakhstan
seen from Pakistan

seen from Indonesia
seen from Türkiye

seen from Malaysia

seen from Nepal

seen from Venezuela
@thecalamitywitchalessandra
Don't be shy, you're making me embarrassed too
We're all on the simp train today! I can't even!
Imagine all of the insufferable oscar bait quarantine movies that are gonna come out in a few years, about a husband and wife forced to stay home together, and slowly learn to actually love and appreciate their spouse.
One of the Important Scenes will be where Husband watches Wife idk fucking eat an entire can of olives and goes “I- I didn’t know you liked olives” and she’s like “Yeh I love them” *insert obnoxious slurping eating noises to prove she is a Relatable Female Character.*
And then cue dramatic melancholy music while he sits and thinks about how his job is actually meaningless in the face of the fact that it’s prevented him from learning more about the woman he married all those years ago.
There’s a bunch of scenes where they look pensively at each other from the doorway. They start off quarantine sitting on chairs on opposite sides of the living room. As the days progress they move closer and closer. By the end of the movie they’re next to each other on a love seat.
It’s about two upper middle class white heterosexuals. He works at a bank and she runs an etsy shop making tiny idly jewelry. Their neighbor is an Eldery Likable Black Man who offers them sage advice talking over the fence of their backyards. He of course eventually dies of the virus, leaving his two neighbors to learn and grow from the experience- and to treasure what really matters in life.
It makes 10 Bazillion dollars and several high brow movie critics talk breathlessly about how it accurately and beautifully handled the emotional and social struggle of life during the pandemic.
Husband is played by like Leonardo DiCaprio or something. Wife is a slim blonde actress who is 20 years younger than him, even though in the move their characters somehow went to high school together. Black Neighbor Killed Off For Character Development is played by Morgan Freeman. The movie is touted as one of the most Important Films Of The Decade.
Yep. That’s The Movie. IMO there also will be Elderly Heroic Asian Woman, owner of a grocery store, speaking bad English, suffering but Performing Heroic Acts for the community, even the asshole racist who will eventually reform, cue tears.
The whole film just flashed in front of my eyes.
#reading this caused 2d10 psychic damage (@must-be-mythtaken)
Aht aht! Dont forget sassy black nurse! Shell appear at some point and you know it! Shell be chubby and the scrubs ill fitting!
The couple will have a new baby at the end because, you know, babies make everything better at the end! The child will be named after either the Black Man or the Asian Lady so that their legacy is honored or something.
They would also name the child covid or some shit completely seriously
“Because it’s (or they’re) what brought us together, for real this time.”
*cue hug from the back by husband, his hands wrapping around her stomach to rest where the baby is, wedding right flashing in the light of the sun* “For real this time.”
Inner Conflict {Open Rp/Starter}
The town burned, the flames danced on each rooftop and spread along, reaching out and engulfing each structure that he saw. This is what had to be done, the whole town had to burn….
Sullan sat in the middle of the street just trying to keep his sanity in tact. He had never done something like this before, torched a whole damn town but it’s not like it was for no reason. It was run by all sorts of monsters who had joined forces to keep themselves sated. Vampires had taken townhall, incubuses and succubuses had taken most, if not all the shops and the nearby pier was run by predatory skinwalkers. What he had done was saved a lot of people…but what if not all were the beasts he saw?
Sullan cursed the thought and looked at burning buildings, it was silent except for the crackling of fire and collapsing buildings. This is what a bounty hunter did, taking care of issues others wouldn’t. He got paid to solve a problem, that’s what he did. He solved a problem. He didn’t know how to properly deal with this split thoughts, he returned to the smaller town, collected his pay and ended up in the tavern. Drinking profusely.
He just wanted to forget a little, keep the thoughts repressed and get home. But it seemed like he wouldn’t be able to return home as he had fallen asleep after laying his head down on the counter. His daikatana still sheathed on his back and everything.
“Hm?” eyes narrowed, finger on her chin “An eyepatch? I think you’d look pretty scary” she holds in a laugh. Alessandra held up her index and middle finger “Two more” she breaths out. “They’ll be more on guard though now that one of them is dead. They may become more aggressive. And since we only had the one hair… we’ll have to figure out where exactly to find them.” Any relief she was feeling was short-lived, the anticipation overcoming her, but focusing on getting healed was priority.
Glancing at Sullan from the corner of her eyes before looking straight ahead. “Sorry, I’d like to use you some more soon…” she breaths out, now that everything had calmed down her mind began to settle. “You’ve helped me out a lot today… no, I should say you’ve helped me for a while now. Doing all this despite this being awfully personal for me; my feelings rear it’s head despite this being a job. I’m quite the terrible person asking you to do such dangerous things, but don’t think I don’t appreciate what you’ve done”. Her hand raises up to her bandaged side letting out a sigh. She was sure her parents would be displeased.
“Thank you” her fingers reach out to grab the hem of his shirt. It was an impulse, not enough time for her overworked reason to stop her, the last of her adrenaline from the victory coming over her. Taking a step closer to him, she went up on her toes, lips brushing against his cheek. “Ahh..” Alessandra lets out a breath as she lowers herself, face flushed. “I shouldn’t move so recklessly” she winces moving her hand back to her injury. “Oh, right. I’ll radio this in,” she mutters as she the radio out, reporting that the witch was dead.
Sullan shook his head with a small smile, “Well, you aren’t that bad. I mean you pulled me out of the drink and into this military life. I probably would be in a way worse situation now or maybe dead. Who knows.” Sullan stops and looks back at Alessandra, watching her get closer. “Plus, being around you never ceases to bore me.” Sullan watches her hand grab his shirt and in response to that he puts his hand under her arm so he can support her if she’s having trouble standing.
What he didn’t expect was the sudden closeness of her face to his. It was so close her own lips brushed against his face, it was….thrilling. His heart suddenly kicked into high gear and his eyes widened. For only a moment he felt her soft breathing on his face. As she lowered herself back to regular standing level he slowly turned his head to look at her. He could tell she was somewhat flustered about it. Sullan was quick to compose himself after she started to radio in. Sullan decided to bring it up later, have a proper conversation while back at base. He placed his hand on his chest, his heart was still beating very quickly. This interaction had made Sullan very quiet as he was assembling his thoughts.
“Come now. I can’t say that I did that for your best interest. It might have even been for my own amusement” she purses her lips at the thought; if that was the case it would make her no better that those old witches. “I think you give me too much credit, but I’m glad I can give you some entertainment” she smiles. “Everything is secure. This is a victory for us” she says. Her hand raised to her forehead, without the adrenaline her headache was coming back full swing. “It looks like everyone will be celebrating tonight. Hopefully they won’t cause me any trouble.” A nap wouldn’t be too bad for awhile.
Moving her hand from her forehead to her cheek, Alessandra took in a deep breath, trying to calm herself down as she walked though the front doors of the mall. Although, him not saying anything afterwards wasn’t helping… She could shot herself right now. But, she wouldn’t want to make her impulsive whims to be looked at too closely! What did she do? No… this wasn’t helping at all; overthinking all this was making her heat up.
“Commander! Everyone is cleared out of the mall. All targets eliminated.” Lieutenant Smith exclaims while landing. “No casualties on our side. Everyone is ready to leave. Both of your injuries…”
“We can deal with them when we get back to base. We’re alive that’s all that matters. Mm,” Alessandra have a nod. “Let’s go. I think it’d be cruel to postpone festivities any longer” She waved her hand signaling to head back to the helicopter.
Sullan was definitely feeling something that was foreign to him, this warmth and heat rushing to his face. His heart picking up, he just couldn’t formulate his thoughts either. He only managed to gather himself somewhat when Lieutenant Smith arrived and he had to snap out of it. He cleared his throat and kept quiet for the most part as Smith gave her report to Alessandra. Sullan walked back to the helicopter and got onto it, his injuries suddenly taking a backseat as he processes a thought. His eyes would look at Alessandra every once in a while as he thought to himself. He looked back out to the moving landscape after awhile and placed his hand on his chest. He had come to a conclusion.
Sullan watched the base come into view and got ready to depart from the helicopter, he would immediately brought to the medical wing and get looked at. Turns out his eye injury is more serious than he thought. His hand will be fine, but his eye will take some time to heal if it all. That witch was saying something, she was apparently cursing his injury but he’s lucky he head butted her when he did. With any luck his eye will heal but for now he has an eyepatch on. As soon as he was allowed to leave the medical wing he could tell the base was going to be loud tonight. A big celebration seemed to be brewing, Sullan would take advantage of it and let himself get loose.
Tension melted from her body as she took a seat on the helicopter. Her side stung. The magic was starting to pour back into her, and the throbbing in her head dulling. At this point, they could leave the town and the remaining people in it to the other battalions that would help with relief and fortifying. She couldn’t care less. Alessandra was reeling, ecstatic even, from their victory, a small bit of her revenge relieved, and she had ended up embarrassing herself. Kissing Sullan just in the heat of the moment... Lips pressed together in an effort to keep herself turning red. What did she do? Surely this would make things awkward, or worse. Why did she need to be so rash about such things? One of the only things her teacher could not properly teach her... Perhaps she should make up something, an excuse, say it was an accident... Ah, he hardly was an idiot and probably wouldn’t buy it no matter how well she acted. With a deep inhale, Alessandra closed her eyes, giving the opportunity to rake her brain.
With little to no complaint, Alessandra was ushered to the medical wing. The bullet in her side was taken out, and she was properly stitched up. She wouldn’t be able to move properly until she could it entirely with magic. Getting slowed down by something like this after such a victory, could not be allowed. Perhaps the only good coming out of this ordeal was that she could rest for a moment without being pestered too much.
Waking an hour after, the witch went to put on a fresh set of clothes that had been folded at the corner of her bed. Getting back to the bunker she was greeted with drunken chatter and laughter. “Hm, I guess they couldn’t wait much longer,” Alessandra sighs as she places her hands in her pockets. Perhaps she should enjoy herself as well for a little while.
So here's the post that could destroy my page.
First off, Charon is my Second Favourite character after Konro and has been for a good year.
I've seen a lot of people get angry recently that Shinra referred to Charon as a gorilla and many are taking this to be a racist slur.
I, personally, do not believe it was meant in that context. Please let me explain my reasoning, I don't wish to fight or argue, this is something that's been bothering me and I would like to put my understanding across.
Can I just give one observation? And I am by no means defending this at all and many people have pointed out how this is so inappropriate.
However, Captain Obi is often referred to as a gorilla, many times, Maki is also referred to as a gorilla, many times - mostly by herself.
I'm hoping beyond all hope that when Shinra called Charon a gorilla, this was meant to imply his brute strength and size - because they don't get much bigger or finer than my boy, Charon - rather than a racial slur.
Maki gets the impression people think she's a 'gorilla cyclops'. This is because she is a muscled goddess with amazing strength.
Obi is called a gorilla by various people, mostly Hibana, and again, this is reference to the fact he is a huge, buscle bound Himbo body builder. Though Hibana seems to think he's all muscle and no brain.
Charon is one of the largest character designs, he's huge, he's full of muscles which protect his soft heart from damage - he's such a worry wort for Haumea.
He is also very strategic and dangerous, Charon is a real big hitter and well respected by his peers despite his sometimes annoying habit of asking endless questions (which I think is cute).
I got off track a bit but in conclusion.
It is my belief that when Shinra called him a gorilla it was in the same context as when Maki or Obi are referred to as such - A big, muscle bound force of nature. I honestly do not think this was a racial slur.
People need to stop getting so offended. Can we not just enjoy things?
when sissy asks vanya how she got those callouses on her fingertips & violin music starts playing in the background
“None of us are supposed to be here, right? I mean, what if it’s us? Has anyone here done anything to screw up the timeline?”
The Umbrella Academy | 2.05 - “Valhalla”
when even the one shared braincell can’t help you
Bonus:
Whose more hated?
Rachel from Tower of God
or Malty from Rising of the Shield Hero?
We're adding Mami from Rental Girlfriend to this list!
Man someone is going to have to clean all this up once this war is over. Food limbs everywhere! Oof
depression comix - 455 - View Site - My Patreon - Buy Me a Ko-Fi
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very sexy of all the crown of candy characters to be pro revenge, none of that “if we kill these people we’ll be just as bad” bullshit, they’re all in for killing the people that fucked them over and it’s gonna be great
are we about to kiss right now??
Inner Conflict {Open Rp/Starter}
The town burned, the flames danced on each rooftop and spread along, reaching out and engulfing each structure that he saw. This is what had to be done, the whole town had to burn….
Sullan sat in the middle of the street just trying to keep his sanity in tact. He had never done something like this before, torched a whole damn town but it’s not like it was for no reason. It was run by all sorts of monsters who had joined forces to keep themselves sated. Vampires had taken townhall, incubuses and succubuses had taken most, if not all the shops and the nearby pier was run by predatory skinwalkers. What he had done was saved a lot of people…but what if not all were the beasts he saw?
Sullan cursed the thought and looked at burning buildings, it was silent except for the crackling of fire and collapsing buildings. This is what a bounty hunter did, taking care of issues others wouldn’t. He got paid to solve a problem, that’s what he did. He solved a problem. He didn’t know how to properly deal with this split thoughts, he returned to the smaller town, collected his pay and ended up in the tavern. Drinking profusely.
He just wanted to forget a little, keep the thoughts repressed and get home. But it seemed like he wouldn’t be able to return home as he had fallen asleep after laying his head down on the counter. His daikatana still sheathed on his back and everything.
“Hm?” eyes narrowed, finger on her chin “An eyepatch? I think you’d look pretty scary” she holds in a laugh. Alessandra held up her index and middle finger “Two more” she breaths out. “They’ll be more on guard though now that one of them is dead. They may become more aggressive. And since we only had the one hair… we’ll have to figure out where exactly to find them.” Any relief she was feeling was short-lived, the anticipation overcoming her, but focusing on getting healed was priority.
Glancing at Sullan from the corner of her eyes before looking straight ahead. “Sorry, I’d like to use you some more soon…” she breaths out, now that everything had calmed down her mind began to settle. “You’ve helped me out a lot today… no, I should say you’ve helped me for a while now. Doing all this despite this being awfully personal for me; my feelings rear it’s head despite this being a job. I’m quite the terrible person asking you to do such dangerous things, but don’t think I don’t appreciate what you’ve done”. Her hand raises up to her bandaged side letting out a sigh. She was sure her parents would be displeased.
“Thank you” her fingers reach out to grab the hem of his shirt. It was an impulse, not enough time for her overworked reason to stop her, the last of her adrenaline from the victory coming over her. Taking a step closer to him, she went up on her toes, lips brushing against his cheek. “Ahh..” Alessandra lets out a breath as she lowers herself, face flushed. “I shouldn’t move so recklessly” she winces moving her hand back to her injury. “Oh, right. I’ll radio this in,” she mutters as she the radio out, reporting that the witch was dead.
Sullan shook his head with a small smile, “Well, you aren’t that bad. I mean you pulled me out of the drink and into this military life. I probably would be in a way worse situation now or maybe dead. Who knows.” Sullan stops and looks back at Alessandra, watching her get closer. “Plus, being around you never ceases to bore me.” Sullan watches her hand grab his shirt and in response to that he puts his hand under her arm so he can support her if she’s having trouble standing.
What he didn’t expect was the sudden closeness of her face to his. It was so close her own lips brushed against his face, it was….thrilling. His heart suddenly kicked into high gear and his eyes widened. For only a moment he felt her soft breathing on his face. As she lowered herself back to regular standing level he slowly turned his head to look at her. He could tell she was somewhat flustered about it. Sullan was quick to compose himself after she started to radio in. Sullan decided to bring it up later, have a proper conversation while back at base. He placed his hand on his chest, his heart was still beating very quickly. This interaction had made Sullan very quiet as he was assembling his thoughts.
“Come now. I can’t say that I did that for your best interest. It might have even been for my own amusement” she purses her lips at the thought; if that was the case it would make her no better that those old witches. “I think you give me too much credit, but I’m glad I can give you some entertainment” she smiles. "Everything is secure. This is a victory for us" she says. Her hand raised to her forehead, without the adrenaline her headache was coming back full swing. "It looks like everyone will be celebrating tonight. Hopefully they won't cause me any trouble." A nap wouldn't be too bad for awhile.
Moving her hand from her forehead to her cheek, Alessandra took in a deep breath, trying to calm herself down as she walked though the front doors of the mall. Although, him not saying anything afterwards wasn’t helping... She could shot herself right now. But, she wouldn’t want to make her impulsive whims to be looked at too closely! What did she do? No... this wasn’t helping at all; overthinking all this was making her heat up.
“Commander! Everyone is cleared out of the mall. All targets eliminated.” Lieutenant Smith exclaims while landing. “No casualties on our side. Everyone is ready to leave. Both of your injuries...”
“We can deal with them when we get back to base. We're alive that's all that matters. Mm,” Alessandra have a nod. “Let’s go. I think it'd be cruel to postpone festivities any longer” She waved her hand signaling to head back to the helicopter.