A Glimpse of her Paradise

A 20-something free spirit based from Philippines who wants to share her life adventures - from the highest peak to the deepest sea and all the roads in between

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do you ever look at something or someone then you realize you didn’t see the next page of what’s going to happen with them.. in your life? kasi ako yes. di ko alam, parang ang setup is i am still here pero di ko na maimagine yung future na dati excited ako. siguro sa pagod or siguro sa paulit ulit na pag plan ko and pag give ng deadlines then *boogsh* walang nagbago. ang labo.

ngayon para na din nag iiba na plano ko sa buhay ko at ayoko na din maging under sa isang sitwasyon na pakiramdam ko sooner or later mariringgan ko ng mga unexpected stuffs na sasabihin sa akin. kakapagod.

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Exposing our personal stuffs online isn’t my thing but i want to share how’s my valentine’s day hehe.

Earlier today i got a message from my bf saying “sakit ng ulo ko” and i know it is because of his work (traveling from one place to another to check different things related sa barko). After his msg nagremind lang ako and then nagsabi na magbbiyahe na papunta office. Me and my bf is not a type of couple na mahaba mag chat sa isa’t isa or always active in chats, ewan ko kung bat kami ganito hahaha

So ayun, pagdating sa office update lang uli sa isa’t isa na safe ako nakarating then mag work na. Siya naman maaga nagstart magbiyahe at busy na mag canvass for materials kaya galit galit muna. Walang planned date since manila-cebu ang agwat, I got a call from unknown number saying I have a cake and need to pick up sa gate ng office. Syempre sobra ko excited inuna ko muna kunin cake bago mag-out at mag lunch haha. Pagkababa sa gate medyo epic pa kasi balak pa ako singilin ng rider for the delivery fee which is bayad na din so nagconfirm muna ako sa bf if siya nagpadeliver na tinanggi niya muna nung una. Anyway, to make the long story short, TADAAAAAH! I received a beautiful cake. Sabi nga ng iba “di naman nakakain ang bulaklak” but look, my bf gave me a chocolate flavored cake na bulaklak ang design haha napakagaling!

Ps, to my “ikaw ang paborito kong desisyunan”, sa palagi kong pinagppray kay Lord na patuloy lang i-bless ng healthy body and lagi safe, i love you baby. Thank you for all the love and support. Kahit lagi ako yung madaming issues in life kasi nga gusto ko almost perfect lahat, naiinis ka lang minsan pero iniintindi mo na ganon na talaga ang pagkatao ko hahaha, i love you. Thank you for not tolerating my bad attitude. I pray we continuously celebrate this life together. I love you baby mwaa.

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Behind the scenes “January” ganaps

Weekend gala with the one & only sa SM

Wala lang, sarap ng waffle sa Saints & Lattes

Always my fave flower “keep shining” ang peg

With the one, sooooo pogi

Happy na, birthday pa!!! Grabe oldie na pala ko but “hello?” that’s life kaya hahaha. So ayun na nga, keri pa naman yan di pa naaaalis sa calendar keber!

And the winner for the month of Jan is ME!!!

So ayun, ang daming ganap last month na ngayon ko lang napagtantong i upload o ikwento dito haha. Sa sobrang dami gusto ko nalang sabihin agad na “iba ka Lord, thank you sa Lord!” hehe

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Last month’s trip to Romblon

Madalas sinasabi ng iba, "it's not always the place that matters, but the person you're with" and that hits me until now. Ang ganda ng Romblon. Sa ilang araw na pag stay namin doon with all thanks to my bf, Jefti and to his family, sobra akong happy.

After 07 months of training, we celebrated his graduation ( one of his life changing achievement ) in their province (finally nakabalik na din siya ulit sa na-miss niyang lugar). Hindi ko alam paano maikkwento lahat kasi ang daming nangyari haha pero lahat nakatatak pa sa isip ko. From Caticlan nag biyahe kami pa- Sta Fe Romblon bago magbiyahe ulit papunta na sa kanila sa San Andres. Mukha lang ako laging pagod kung titingnan pero masaya ako kasama niya ako sa trip na ‘to.. seryoso. Sabado ng hapon na kami nakarating sa kanila, pagod sa biyahe pero syempre “yahoooo dito na kamiiii” ang mood hehe. Ang cute ng tatlo nilang aso lalo na si dawang, ewan basta tuwang tuwa ako kasi nahihiya siya lumapit pero pag aalis eh sasama na siya. Linggo ay busy na ang lahat, ito kasi ang time para magsama sama ulit sa bahay nila yung iba pa nilang relatives, a get together to congratulate him. Happy ako ma-meet sila, fave ko si auntie hehe. Nakakatuwa makita sila na masaya pero sadyang di ko lang alam ang gagawin, hiya ako sobra. Lunes ay nagpasyal naman kami — umikot sa tablas ( alam ko buong tablas kasi inikot namin kahit saglit eh haha ). Happy ako (pang ilang ulit ko na ba ‘to sinabi? haha). Pagkadapit hapon eh nakapag bangka pa kami “aaaaah” kahit tinotoyo ay thankful ako at pinilit ako isama ni bf. Martes, nagbiyahe na kami pabalik manila. That time di ako makaramdam ng lungkot pero now na nagbbrowse ako mga picture eh nakakamiss din pala doon. Di ko masisisi si bf bakit mahal na mahal niya Romblon.

PS, to my one and only Jefti, thank you lagi sa mga bagay na gusto mong magkasama natin ma-appreciate at ma-experience. Thank you kasi isinama mo ko sa journey mo, nakakaproud ka. May you continue to receive life’s blessings, you deserve all the good things. Happy ako for you, palagi. I love you.

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Thank you Lord for making it happened.

I know this is not because of me alone. For the past months, i am emotionally unstable and somewhat sensitive. Konting kibot dinadamdam ko. May mga oras pa sinasabi ko "ok, magrereview na ko" pero bigla nalang ako natutulala. Ganon yata talaga kapag marami kang gusto mangyari sa buhay mo.. sa dami wala kang maumpisahan. 'Wag tularan.

Day before the exam, gusto ko lang sabihin na madaming naganap. Di ko alam kung tutuloy pa ba ko o kung ano kinabukasan ng answer sheet ko but Lord really provides 'no? He really have plans for us. Habang nasa biyahe kami papunta sa school natulo yung luha at sipon ko, di ko alam paano mag eexam ng mabigat ang loob pero nangyari ang nangyari. Sinagot ang dasal.

I passed the exam at gusto ko lang sabihin sa makakabasa nito na gusto mag take ng exam (cse, licensure, atbp) or nasaktuhan at may upcoming exam, you can make it. Lagi mo lang gawin yung part mo and "when the time is right, He will make it happen". Pray lang lagi and keep on manifesting that you can have whatever your heart's desire. Walang imposible.

( To Jefti, i want to share this achievement with you. Thank you for believing and for being with me along the way. I am always grateful. )

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Celebrating Month of June

{Cuyambay Tanay Rizal - June 24, 2023}

They say, “a private life is such a happy life” but i can’t help myself to share our beautiful escape last weekend.

So here we go.. me and my bf planned to have a trip to Tanay Rizal. We planned it ahead of time, we searched for different campsites and all but i couldn’t get an approval from my parents regarding overnight kaya *booghs* hilo. I cried. We have small misunderstandings along the way but guess what? if it’s meant for you, no one else can take it from you.. before the target day “PINAYAGAN NG PARENTS!!!”

Saturday morning we started to travel from Manila to Tanay (kasangga ang google map). Sa biyahe palang papunta sobrang kilig at saya ko na. Not sure if i can share every details (inaantok na habang nagtatype) but one thing is for sure.. i am at my happiest era that day. Nagpunta ng treasure mountain, nagkaroon ng quality time together, nag enjoy sa pagtanaw sa kagandahan ng lugar, not to mention he even do everything so i can enjoy the rest day with him (kahit kaya ko naman kumilos). What a man. What a blessed weekend it is.

I love everything about this trip. Being able to spend it with my safe haven is a real blessing for me. Sulit talaga. My heart is full.

PS, my always.. thank you for spending your rest day with me in tanay. Thank you for your patience. I couldn’t ask for more. I love you.

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To someone whom i love the most and will never get tired of admiring.. thank you palagi. Thank you for appreciating my whole existence and understanding the “not so stable” phase of my life.

Jefti, you just made things even better and i am really grateful for that. Hindi ko alam sa kung paano ko maipapaalam sa’yo na masaya akong merong ikaw pero sana naipapadama ko. I love you and i really do. If i had to pick one person to be in my corner, it’d be you. Everytime. Happy heart’s day!

[borderlinereminders]

Sometimes your worst fears are true. Sometimes you’ve annoyed a loved one. Sometimes you’ve even upset them or frustrated them.

But you know what? It doesn’t mean they’re done with you. It doesn’t mean they’re going to leave you.

It is normal to be annoying sometimes. It’s normal to not be perfect and to have off days. It’s normal for relationships to not be in perfect harmony all the time.

My point here is, yes, while sometimes they are true, it isn’t the end of everything. It’s actually quite normal. And you’re going to be okay.

[borderlinereminders]

I was annoyed by my partner earlier. He forgot to do something that was important. I also felt frustrated. It wasn’t a huge thing, but it still sucked. And you know what? I still love him! I’m going to marry him and I’m laying next to him while he sleeps thinking about how excited I am to spend my life with him!

[wavesrising-deactivated20190412]

connecting to another person means understanding that they are human and capable of mistakes. understand that they have a shadow that needs to be acknowledged, as well as a lifetime of conditioning and programming to recognize and release. don’t idealize your partners, allow them humanity. 

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Yesterday, I received a bouquet of flowers and a box of cupcakes from a guy. It was a very pleasant feeling. I want to share more about how my mom received it from the delivery man and what happened before i came home but .. next time nalang siguro hehe.

Ps, to someone who pulled some strings.. thank you. I’m not a mushy gushy person but I do appreciate you and all the little things you do. Oftentimes i don’t mind your messages, seen lang, idk if you know the reasons why.. but it doesn’t mean that I hate you or what. If you’re reading this, please know that even without the material things i am still grateful that you appreciate my existence. Thank you.

[slfcare]

the future doesn't exist yet. everyone around you who seems so certain of who they'll be in ten years is harboring an idea, hoping, but all we have is right now is our current reality inching forward with time. if you don't know who you want to be yet and can't even imagine a future with you in it: it's okay. you aren't supposed to know everything, or have this detailed view of what you want it to be like. but there's no harm in hoping for a future that fits you, and watching it shape itself into a more tangible reality as it comes. most importantly, you don't have to feel guilty for not feeling like you're able to see past tomorrow. you can take it one day at a time.

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i was thinking about this today and would just like to add: the future not existing yet also means that everything you’re dreading, everything you’re afraid of, every worst case scenario you’ve conjured up in your mind is not real. you’re not doomed to mess up anything, you’re not facing a set-in-stone future, and whatever you do today can change everything you’re afraid of. so, if it helps, stop scolding yourself for becoming someone or going somewhere that, at the end of the day, is just a hypothetical.

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What is hard to endure, sweet to remember

{Mt Tapulao, Zambales}

Dati pa man ay gusto ko ng malaman kung ano ang pakiramdam ng magtravel mag isa o kung hindi naman ay ang magtravel ng isa lang ang kakilala. Last month, walang malalim na dahilan, nag “interested” ako sa isang event na pinost sa Facebook. Bilis din agad mag chat ni Kuya Arnel (Organizer ng ALM) kung gusto ko daw bang sumama.

Hindi inisip kung kakayanin ba ang 2,037 mASL basta nung kinausap ng organizer nagpalista agad (napaka pokmaru talaga ni ate girl haha).

Naiiba sa nakasanayan kong oras, 9pm palang nasa Shaw Boulevard na kami. Sa tagal ng biyahe, 4am na ng makarating kami ng zambales. Dahil magliliwanag na din nagkaroon lang ng kaunting orientation at nag umpisa na kaming maglakad paakyat.

First 2.5km sementado ang daan paakyat. After ng sementado, galit na galit ka ng sasalubungin ng mga naglalakihang bato to the 9th power (haha). Nung una katanggap tanggap pa eh, kalaunan napaisip na ko kung di rin tayo sa huli aawatin ba ang puso kong ibigin ka (CHAR).

From 5km to 12km nagsimula ng mag ulan-hinto-ulan. Wala na din pakundangan yung bato sa daan kaya puro “Aray”, “Di na po ko uulit mama”, “Bakit ganito ba yung pinili kong buhay” at ang pinakamaraming points na “Ayoko na” nalang kami.

Nakakapagod dahil talagang basagan ng tuhod ang nangyari pero sobrang fulfilling kapag nasa itaas ka na.

Naalala ko habang nasa tapulao kami nakailang sabi ako na “di na ko uulit” pero ngayong nasa bahay na ako ayoko naman tanggihan ang mga susunod na plano ni Lord (haha). Thank You, Lord! Thank you din po sa mga bagong nakilala. Thankful din po akong nakapagshare ako kay Kuya Edgar at John (tour guide sa Tapulao) ng mga meaningful thoughts. AAAAH I love you, Lord.

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Rockin’ on the rockies

{Mt. Maculot, Batangas - May 26, 2019} 

Minsan sa sobrang pagod sa trabaho ang sarap nalang talagang madeds, maglaho na parang bula o di kaya nama’y magpakain sa lupa (good thing may mga lugar na pwede kang mapuntahan tulad ng Mt. Maculot sa Batangas).

Month of March, nagsimula na kaming magplano. Walang kaabog-abog nakisuyo na ako kay Jerome na kumausap ng travel agency na pwedeng tumulong sa amin. Isa sa nakausap ni Jerome ang Alt3rnate Route na pumayag agad sa napili naming araw.

Month of April, ahon na sana namin. Handa na ang lahat kaso biglaang hindi pwede sina Lady at Lex sa napag-usapang araw. Hindi magiging fair para sa kanila kung tutuloy kami ng di sila kasama kaya nagdesisyon ang grupo na i-resched nalang. Sama-sama sa pagplano, sama-sama dapat na pupunta at uwi.

Araw ng sabado (May 25, 2019), heto na nga at araw na ng alis. Sa SM MOA napag-usapang magkikita kita pero dahil malayo at di ko alam ang biyahe kung hindi magtataxi/LRT, sumabay na ako kanila Sean, Jimmy, Aaron at Jerome sa pagpunta (ang bait nila hindi ako pinagbayad ng pamasahe aww).

Sa biyahe papunta, lahat tahimik. Bukod sa pa-sounds ng mga kanta ni Taylor Swift, hilik lang ni Aaron naririnig namin (haha). Sa totoo lang habang sinusulat ko ito hindi ko alam kung paano ko ibabahagi lahat ng mga nangyare sa pag-ahon at pagbaba namin sa rockies. Mga tahimik sa biyahe pero ang kukulit na ng makarating sa Batangas eh. Sobrang solid din kahit hanggang rockies lang. Hindi kami umabot ng Summit dahil sarado daw sabi ni Kuyang Tour guide (may kaguluhan daw sa pagmamay-ari ng Lupa). Nakakapanghinayang man we still look at the brighter side nalang.

Sobrang saya ko na sila nakasama ko sa biyahe na ‘to. Bukod sa pagtunog ng tiyan ko dahil sa gutom naging highlight din ng ahon ang pag-inom namin ng buko juice at ang muntikan ng di pagbayad ni Sean (Oops wag po natin siyang husgahan, nagbayad din po naman hahaha). 

Thank you, Lord. I am recharged by your Words. I am recharged by Your beautiful Masterpiece. Sobra sobra na pong blessings ang makapunta at makauwi kami ng ligtas. Thank you, Lord. Thank you din sa lahat ng sumama. Yiehhhh.

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SM MOA Happiness Run 2019

Ang daming pendings, rush reports at problema sa Office. Sabay sabay na meetings at sermon na uubusin ang lakas at pasensiya mo. So, saan kukuha ng lakas? Anong dapat gawin para mabuo ulit?

Bago pa man dumating ang isang malaking alon ng stress na papatay sa katawang lupa ko, nakita ko na ‘to. Nagkalat na ang mga posters and posts sa facebook para sa darating na SM MOA Happiness Run (March 17, 2019). Nung una hindi ako interesado, sa isip-isip ko “uubusin ko pa ba natitirang lakas ko?”. Masyado ko rin sigurong sinulit ang pagtakbo last month kaya pakiramdam ko ubos ako. Sa Office, malayo sa simoy ng hangin sa Diokno, nagkaka-ayaan din sila ng tumakbo sa darating na Sharp Run na gaganapin sa Filinvest Alabang. Ako? wala pa ring lakas para mag-”Oo”.

Lumipas ang isang linggo bago mangyaring maging final ang lahat. Di ko namalayan tatakbo na pala ako sa event na ‘to.

Sa venue ng event, ang saya ng vibes. Di ko alam pero nung nakarating kami ni Vanessa sa MOA na-excite ulit ako. Nakalimutan kong stress na naman ako kinabukasan. Ang cool ng mga set-ups. Ang cute ng design ng mga singlets. Sa daan ng pagtatakbuhan meron din silang pa-slides at bubbles. Ang saya lang. May pa-free concert din ang Orange n’ Lemon at Join the Club. Solid. Ganito pala ‘yon no? Ganito pala dapat. Kapag pakiramdam mo nauubos ka na, magpahinga ka lang. Huminga ka. Mahalaga ang oras kaya iisipin mong magpatuloy pero lalo ka lang mauubos. Huminto ka saglit, umiyak kung kinakailangan. Minsan kailangan mo din tanggapin ang mga lyrics mula sa kanta ng Five for Fighting, “It may sound absurd, but don't be naive, even heroes have the right to bleed.” Hindi ka bayani pero tao ka. Napapagod rin.

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CNY Lucky Run 2019

“Before every run is a race between your mind and an excuse. Win it.”

Hindi nagising sa oras kaya ang ending todo bilis ang kilos. Pinagkasya ang 1hr para maligo, magkape at pumuntang monumento lrt station. Mabait ang kasama kaya hindi pinagalitan (ano na janet haha).

Sa biyahe, nag uusap na kami ni Danna na hindi kami aabot ng 5:30am sa venue. Kailangan tanggapin na late na. Pagdating sa Gil Puyat sumakay pa kami ng maliit na jeep (around 5:20am na yata). Nakarating sa MOA ng 5:25am (not sure) kaya hala sige takbo (haha). Blessed at nakarating sa venue ng lagpas 5:30am pero nagwa-warm up palang. Thank you, Lord!

Grabeng experience pero super saya at na-conquered ang first ever Chinese New Year run together. Thank you, Danna! (Magse-set na ako ng maraming alarm haha).

KUNG HEI FAT CHOI! 🐷