The Comeback Mumma Life_the_menopause_and_me

A woman not afraid to talk real about the good, the bad & the downright ugly in a bid to help others overcome life challenges and comeback! You have got this!

[thecomebackmumma]

So I have had a good positive week. I have been really good mentally and emotionally. I have started a diet that I know works for me I am on day 7 on plan (Cambridge Diet), 9 days since stopping HRT. My Anxiety has come from nowhere today. Staying 100% on plan. I am better distracted. First day in 8 days that I have had this feeling. A little shaky, heart racing and thoughts running wild. Not sure why. Two days after monthlys's ended. Hormones? Not sure so riding it through. Will go for a walk soon. Staying positive. I just don't like feeling this way. 💕 I did say I would be honest this is it 😘🙏 Riding through and trying my best to keep going. The way my body reacts to the anxiety is the part I don't like and the way the low mood sets in.

[thecomebackmumma]

So for the past few months it has been an absolute rollercoaster of emotions. So many amazing things have happened that I am eternally grateful for however, behind closed doors I have been really struggling with mental health, the menopause, weight gain (due to some old habits creeping back, medication, anxiety and menopause) It has affected all parts of my life especially my self esteem and confidence. The always Vibrant Rosie truthfully lost her spark and that is hard when you really are the most positive, happy and smiley person that truly am as a human being. That really messes with your mental health and anxiety and low mood because you know it's not you. The fact I have gained a little weight in all honesty really did affect my self esteem as I have always been my own best advert for what I do but I want to say, that doesn't change who I am, how I motivate and this stumble helps me understand my clients and their struggles and also show them that it is always possible to comeback. I have spent the past few days talking to myself and what I can do. I want to do what I do best and in my own suffering I help others. To be honest that really helps me.

I am not going to let it beat me!

I have beaten so much more than this and I will not be beaten. It's been a hard and challenging time. However, instead of letting it me beat me I am blogging it in a bid to help others. I have and will always "comeback" I have tried two types of HRT and am tired of trying. Not sure why it doesn't agree with me but my mental health suffers and my body reacts badly to it. I am going natural and going to use this time to work on me. I am on anxiety medication and to be honest they are helping at the moment. So there it is. I want to bring hope and awareness to other women and here for you. I have been at rock bottom but I am going to use this time to start my own journey to self discovery. I am going to work on myself and hopefully helps others along the way. You really are not alone.

This shows my vulnerability, my honesty and the reality that I am human and what goes up sometimes has to come down. I will rise again. I will comeback and I am and will always help others along the way.

I am starting plan tomorrow to lose a few lbs before Christmas and would love to join my clients as we embark on this journey together. I know it works, I know I can keep it off, this has been a major blip in my life but I will never give up. I will never be back where I started even if I am halfway there! I am turning around and going straight back to my happy place if it kills me! I will ignite that spark again. Who is with me?

I always believe in being honest, this is my story and I now embark on my new chapter.....

Love always Rosie "thecomebackmumma" ❤️

[thecomebackmumma]

4/13/21 So yesterday was a good day. My parents had the girls for a few hours whilst me & hubby went for lunch a a bit of shopping. We went for Lebanese. It was lovely a favourite of ours. We had a good chat and we needed it away from the home and all the stresses. I remembered why we were such a good fit and why we work so well. We had lost that. I have to remember that this part of my transition is extremely hard for for him we also have our teenager going through a lot hormonally too. However, I did explain what helps me and our daughter and what doesn't so let's see if he takes it on board. Fingers crossed! 🤞

Our daughter is at a karate selections today in Wolverhampton so hubby has taken her and me and our youngest are at home. I didn't sleep well last night, the dreams are so weird and vivid also maybe pressures but our teen kept waking. However, proud that she went and faced her fears or insecurities.

I am still on my period after stopping the HRT two days ago and the bloatedness has started to subside. I feel better a little mentally and I seem to be more calm. Maybe my body doesn't like being pumped full of hormones. Who knows?! All I know is I am really starting to feel a little better already. My mood is starting to life although I am on the Mirtazapine so could he that too. I have decided I am going to start on plan tomorrow in a bid to lose a few lbs before Christmas. I lost nearly 6 stone in just over 5 months with this diet and I had maintained for over 3 years before this hurdle so know it works and is achievable to maintain. I will keep you posted. I need to start regaining control of my life, my body and my mind! Only I can do this. I know by regaining control of this will definitely help me feel in control and strong enough to deal with the rest.

I will keep you posted but honestly, I feel today will be another good day again. I am going for a dog walk with my youngest and may pop by the local farmers market for a treat before starting tomorrow. My closure. Now for the next chapter. Will speak to you later. Rosie x

[thecomebackmumma]

Date day with hubby today. Rare occasion. Looking forward to it. Starting to gain back control. New chapter in my life. I feel today is going to be a good day.

We got this 💪💪💪💪🙌❤️

[thecomebackmumma]

After months of darkness, today is the day I seize control of my life, my marriage, my relationships and me. Watch as I blog it, become my own book, write my story. My life, menopause, anxiety, depression, the happy times, how I motivate others at the same time, special needs mum, mum with potential ADHD, wife, award winning weight plan consultant, how I deal with my own weight (loss, emotional eating, and maintenance). Dealing with a parent with Terminal cancer, dealing with past traumas and anything written lose life wants to throw at me. I am here and waiting! Armour on and willing to talk and speak out. It will be Raw, Real, and totally laid bare.

This is me, my journey and my story.

Thank you for joining me and I hope this helps.

Love Rosie xx

[thecomebackmumma]

So it's Saturday 4.12.21, today the Kids are spending some time with my parents and myself and Glen are going to try and have a date day. I didn't sleep too well. The dreams were extremely vivid and all over the place. I don't know if it the Mirtazapine causing them. I remembered what they were but they have gone again! That's definitely how my brain works. Unless I write anything down immediately it disappears into the black hole never to be seen again. Anyway, so the dilemma begins, what to wear. Especially when you feel nothing at all fits you. So far the house is peaceful but my teen is asleep. I know when she wakes that could change in a heartbeat. My Husband has taken the dog for walk and I am sat here watching cooking programmes whilst writing this and having a coffee.

After Dad got Diagnosed with Terminal Cancer 2nd lockdown I began to dread seeing my parents, i know that sounds really bad but it's so hard with Dad's illness it's so hard to see him deteriorating. I go in to avoidance mode. I dont mean to but it helps me to deal it or feel I am dealing with it. I know I am not. I love him dearly and hate seeing him suffer. I always give him the BIGGEST hug when I do see him. I have had all 3 covid injections but it still scares me that the kids will take something to him as he is so vulnerable.

I decided to not take my HRT yesterday after a few people said that combination made them worse. I have definitely felt worse. Guess what?! After not taking both the estrogen gel and the Progesterone tablet one night my period started this morning. Was it stopping it from coming? I really don't know! Anyway, I am going to stop taking that over the weekend but continue with the Mirtazapine for the minute, I will try to call the GP on Monday. I have been having counselling and she advised I ask the GP for a blood test to check my vitamin levels. After ringing them I was told I need a letter so back to square one again trying to organise that. Such a shame we can't just ask for things like that especially when your symptoms could mean you are low on vitamin D maybe even lithium. I think I need to talk to the doctor about what to do next. It will be interesting to know if I start to feel better whilst we try and investigate what works and what doesn't.

So how do I feel today? A lot more positive as I feel so much better knowing someone has read this blog so will continue to write and post here. I feel this will help others too along the way. I am still bloated and have all the symptoms at the moment but knowing there are people out there that understand has helped me. I am just going to do my best to get through the best I can. I have always been a glass half full kind of girl, need to start trying to find her again whilst being kind. I have comeback from so much in my life I am determined to come back from this.

So happy Saturday beautiful people, I really hope you have an amazing day and I will let you know how my day goes....... You got this, we got this. Love Rosie x

[thecomebackmumma]

So what runs through my mind this time of night. Half past midnight. Sat in the dark writing this right now.......

1) The medical insurance form I need to complete for my husband......yes, remember how many times I saw the doctor, when, and what for over the past year! Well that should be easy along with the Menopause and brain fog.

2) The bedroom that needs to become an office for my gorgeous husband. Lockdown has killed the freedom I had of working from home. Hubby to work from home 4 days + indefinitely. Yes, you heard it, indefinitely. I love him but boy do I miss my space. I have had the IKEA unit for months, why haven't I put it up yet? Because I am putting it off due to the fact it's our bedroom. Will that help us regain our sex life having an office staring at me in my should be sanctuary. Someone please tell me! Our room is an absolute tip at the moment I feel like I am drowning and used to be so bloody organised.

3) My teenage daughter and worrying about her going off the rails with the current pressures of exams and other things at the minute whilst her peers around her do drugs, self harm or starve them selves as coping mechanisms. Honestly it's such a scary world we live in now. I am doing my best to keep her on track and know she is level headed but for how long!!

4) My poor Dad has Terminal cancer and blood clots and nothing can be done or treated so just a waiting game. Finding that tough and that has definitely helped towards any emotional eating habits creeping back.

5) my 8 year old daughter potentially having some additional needs. Alongside my teen and eldest (potentially me too)

All the chores that need doing.......so many...... appointments I may have missed or forgotten, what I have on next week.....honestly I really can't keep up.......tabs kicking in a little now.....time for some sleep sounds.

Speak tomorrow. Rosie x

[thecomebackmumma]

Here we go 3/12/21 11.30pm....off to bed. Today has been a little strange, if I hear one more person say I look tired even after making the effort to put on makeup and get dressed up, even if it was the biggest thing I could find. Honestly, I will scream! I ran my community coffee morning this morning on Fridays for the lonely and isolated that I set up in lockdown. We have become good friends and talk about mental health and daily struggles. However, my lovely "Vibrant Group" are starting to notice Rosie is not quite her vibrant self and a little distant. Brain fog? New meds? Lack of sleep? Who knows but I am hating not being my jolly vibrant self. so now after an evening of setting up this blog on my bid to give me somewhere to vent but help others along the way, I am now sat on the loo! Oh yes, they dont tell you how messed up your digestive system becomes..... I am a bubbling wreck who is intolerant to bloody everything right now. I look 9 months pregnant and that really is not the best look when you are a weight plan consultant who doesn't have a baby due any second. Honestly, my main anxieties come from how my clients will see me as I had always been a great advert for what I do and offer. I know I will get that back when this all settles but that doesn't help me right now does it? I was sat in the bathroom so long that hubby and my dog Leia were fast asleep on the bed giving me some time to finish this post. Now knowing I have to go to bed now I just want you to know how much I dread this part of the day. After weeks on HRT (2nd try in a different method) and still no joy I have been given Mirtazapine for the anxiety and the number for crisis! Yes you heard it right. Vibrant, jolly, happy Rosie is at risk of topping herself. I honestly thought I had dealt with that a few years ago after my last bout of post natal depression. So back to the Mirtazapine, sorry if I go off track its how my brain works and a common sign of ADHD, it's only just coming to light I may have that too, something else to add to the list! So where was I, yes the new meds for anxiety. Well, the 1st one I took a few days ago knocked me for six. I got excited. Maybe I can sleep now even though I am exhausted, mentally drained but no....... I am still unable to sleep. A husband frustrated because he wants me next to him but can't stand the glare of my phone whilst I try endlessly to find some pod cast or you tube meditation to try and fall asleep too! The huffing and puffing that makes my anxieties rise. His tossing and turning, my tossing and turning, my thoughts running wild, to do list mounting up! My sex drive is non existent and the fact I am not ready to spoon when it's lights out is stressful for both of us. Groundhog Day! Not only for me but for others. Will this ever end? Will I ever want sex again, feel sexy again, feel me again? I bloody hope so because a life like this is miserable. What the hell has happened to me? Welcome to my daily blog as it is....the high and lows of my bipolar type mood as I embark on the menopause journey. Good night for now........... Love Rosie - The comeback Mumma x

[thecomebackmumma]

The Real Menopause for me at the moment. I really did hit crisis point and using this blog to help others. I really am a happy, positive, motivating person.In reality, this is me on my bad days. The anxiety is real, the struggle is real. If filming this and posting it helps others feel they are not alone then I am glad I did it. 

[thecomebackmumma]

I am tired of how I feel, I think it's time we are heard. This is my life more days than none. So many women feeling the same way. It's time we were heard.

[thecomebackmumma]

Today you will do your best and that is enough

The Comeback Mumma

[thecomebackmumma]

Give yourself the same time, love and attention you give others, then watch yourself bloom

The Comeback Mumma 

[thecomebackmumma]

My menopause symptoms on a daily basis, anxiety the worse ever. Trying to find the right HRT this is my 2nd round.......not looking good so far! 

[thecomebackmumma]

Every day is a new new beginning. Take a deep breath, smile and start again

The Comeback Mumma

[thecomebackmumma]

The Real Menopause for me at the moment. I really did hit crisis point and using this blog to help others. I really am a happy, positive, motivating person.In reality, this is me on my bad days. The anxiety is real, the struggle is real. If filming this and posting it helps others feel they are not alone then I am glad I did it. 

[thecomebackmumma]

Just a few of my life experiences I will share - I will always COMEBACK MUMMA!

My personal experiences in life have been challenging. Traumatic experiences as a child, childhood experiences of a dependant parent, Domestic and emotional violence, ectopic pregnancy, miscarriage, poly-hydrumus, depression and eating disorder. Now hitting the menopause I feel it is my time to REALLY help other women by sharing my life, the menopause & me. There really is light at the end of the tunnel.

[thecomebackmumma]

One small crack doesn't mean you are broken, it means you were put to the test & didn't fall apart

The Comeback Mumma

[thecomebackmumma]

Weight Loss & the Menopause

I lost nearly 6 stone at 41 as I was determined not to hit the menopause overweight! I achieved it all on the 1:1 diet by Cambridge Weight Plan and now help others achieve the same as an independent consultant. I am so passionate about empowering women that I feel I have a gift and will always do what I can to help support support other women. Hence, starting this blog. However, I am human, menopausal and struggling to keep it down. Join me as i embark on emotional eating, medication, HRT and all the high’s & low’s of weight gain, weight loss and maintenance, That constant struggle to fit in and be bloody perfect! Join me as i try to find my perfect! Whatever that may be!