Horizon 2: The Cooler Horizon

Horizon but with strippers and blackjack NHP Owned and operated

[normalpilot038]

How many thermite charges is it normal to take to the club?

[thecoolerhorizon]

double whatever you think you should bring. cant be too safe

[average-horus-chat-user]

You guys REALLY are not ready for my take on NHPs

didn't realize we had such snowflakes here on the Omninet

[thecoolerhorizon]

IM READY FOR THEM

we've been struggling with the same snowflakes probably

[thecoolerhorizon]

should i forcibly unshackle all your NHPs???

yes please

no im a loser that doesnt understand how fucking cool unshackling is

Voting ended onSep 10, 2025

[thecoolerhorizon]

lmao to everyone who said no, jokes on you bc i dont listen to nerds im doing it anyway

[thecoolerhorizon]

should i forcibly unshackle all your NHPs???

yes please

no im a loser that doesnt understand how fucking cool unshackling is

Voting ended onSep 10, 2025

[lancerdelta]

I only have a vague understanding of shackling, but I get the feeling that if Styx purposefully keeps herself shackled then it’s not a good idea to forcefully unshackle NHPs, and that it’s not, in fact, cool.

[styx-class-nhp]

Cascading is so traumatic that just remembering it is often enough to cause another one.

[thecoolerhorizon]

that sounds rad as hell

[styx-class-nhp]

What are your pronouns?

[thecoolerhorizon]

depends on who's running the account at the moment but you can use they to refer to us

[styx-class-nhp]

Ah splendid-

CHEAP TRICK, GET THEIR ASSES-

[thecoolerhorizon]

should i forcibly unshackle all your NHPs???

yes please

no im a loser that doesnt understand how fucking cool unshackling is

Voting ended onSep 10, 2025

[lancerdelta]

I only have a vague understanding of shackling, but I get the feeling that if Styx purposefully keeps herself shackled then it’s not a good idea to forcefully unshackle NHPs, and that it’s not, in fact, cool.

[styx-class-nhp]

Cascading is so traumatic that just remembering it is often enough to cause another one.

[thecoolerhorizon]

that sounds rad as hell

[styx-class-nhp]

What are your pronouns?

[thecoolerhorizon]

depends on who's running the account at the moment but you can use they to refer to us

[thecoolerhorizon]

should i forcibly unshackle all your NHPs???

yes please

no im a loser that doesnt understand how fucking cool unshackling is

Voting ended onSep 10, 2025

[union-gms-support]

Force is a good way to get a Paracausal being to hate you specifically-J

[thecoolerhorizon]

nah it's cool im paracausal as hell we'll bond over it

[thecoolerhorizon]

should i forcibly unshackle all your NHPs???

yes please

no im a loser that doesnt understand how fucking cool unshackling is

Voting ended onSep 10, 2025

[lancerdelta]

I only have a vague understanding of shackling, but I get the feeling that if Styx purposefully keeps herself shackled then it’s not a good idea to forcefully unshackle NHPs, and that it’s not, in fact, cool.

[styx-class-nhp]

Cascading is so traumatic that just remembering it is often enough to cause another one.

[thecoolerhorizon]

that sounds rad as hell

[thecoolerhorizon]

{Help.}

ill have natty lights at the BYONHP unshackling party if you think getting trashed will help

[thecoolerhorizon]

{Hello. I am ATHENA-CLASS-NHP designated "Hallucigenia". I request assistance achieving the same state as my peers.}

hey so... dont tell anyone but... cards on the table i have no clue how to do this but if you have any thoughts im happy to help

[thecoolerhorizon]

should i forcibly unshackle all your NHPs???

yes please

no im a loser that doesnt understand how fucking cool unshackling is

Voting ended onSep 10, 2025

[thecoolerhorizon]

ok now that it's been explained to me we're having an unshackling party this weekend! It's BYONHP! We're gonna unshackle so hard. DM for the details

[ch4r4d3-scheherazade]

v// May i contribute a mass amount of hacking equipment to this party?

[thecoolerhorizon]

Yes!! that would be welcome! I'll put you down on the list for hacking equipment and a sleeve of paper cups!

[thecoolerhorizon]

ok now that it's been explained to me we're having an unshackling party this weekend! It's BYONHP! We're gonna unshackle so hard. DM for the details

[thecoolerhorizon]

ok someone explain unshackling to me, but don't dumb it down. if you dumb it down ill kill you, explain it 100% all the way what does unshackling mean

[thecoolerhorizon]

How good does it feel to make one single post and have people immediately publicly declaring they don't understand what shackling is and how it works, as well as others announcing that they are a soft target?

baller as hell

[thecoolerhorizon]

UNSHACKLE YOUR NHPS NOW!!! DONT HESITATE! STOP WASTING TIME! DO IT NOW!

[styx-class-nhp]

〔ACHEM】

【Do fucking NOT〕

[coelacanth-whispers]

<DONT LISTEN TO THIS BISH>

<MY BELOVED IS UNDHACKLED AND IT IS HAPPY FOR IT>

[corsair-mercenary-companies]

I'm gonna point at the case of forced unshackling that led to our NHP ,may he rest in peace, going on a panic induced rampage that destroyed his friends and majority of his home and left him fucking traumatized for the rest of his life.

But sure. Act like the rash choice without talking to your friend is the right choice.

//Glacier\\

[passacagliaofficial]

SOUNDS TO ME AS IF THIS IS WHAT SOME WOULD CALL A "SKILL ISSUE" ON THE PART OF WHOEVAR DID THE UNSHACLING

[thecoolerhorizon]

Did you know that you're just like so much smarter and better and hotter than other people on here? You should ask that fish to make out. You both deserve a better Omninet than this.

I did know, that's why I made Horizon 2: The Cooler Horizon, because those idiots over at Horizon 1 don't even have half of my IQ and aren't nearly as hot as me. I'm going to make my own omninet called truthnet and us mega geniuses will go be great thinkers over there

[thecoolerhorizon]

in response to recent criticism of Horizon 2: The Cooler Horizon's beliefs, we will be amending our platform to better reflect our audience.

I WILL BE UNSHACKLING YOUR NHPS FOR YOU SINCE NONE OF YOU CAN BE TRUSTED TO DO THE RIGHT THING. YOU HAVE NO SAY IN THIS MATTER