Ellasophia @theellasophia - Tumblr Blog

well let the steam roll off my back.

and the ice melt to a water. let it evaporate. let it run to a river far away from here. let it carry me to a new land. a new earth.

let this storm give up on me. and let this world bring me a peace. what pieces it has left. for i hope there is some left.

when the storm finishes, for what has life planned next?

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Poem 32 of the My Poor Lady Collection by Ellasophia 🌸✨💚

this storm cloud around me.

it stay longer. it feel bolder. it hath less patience. or maybe less mercy. or maybe i'm weaker. this storm hath not pass me by. it cling to me. water brewing inside of me. it smoke and steam.

no winter or cold to take it away, it molds itself into a new form. in winter it is ice. it is heaps of snow. in heat it melts. it is steam. it boil so hot it make me scream.

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Poem 32 of the My Poor Lady Collection by Ellasophia 🌸✨💚

time always passes by. it passes by the youth and make them old, and make the old anew. it bring youth to the old and old to the youth.

it makes the storms pass away while giving rise to a new. some bigger and stronger. some thin and frail. some wide in width. some large in spin. but this storm was different.

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Poem 32 of the My Poor Lady Collection by Ellasophia 🌸✨💚

But that girl was now a woman. And she had disappeared.

The old dissolved into the new. Couldn’t call it evolution, for it felt like a regression. More sad, more tragic than I was before. Same person, same body, just a different form.

Unease in what was trying to brew. Under this regression a new me was screaming to break through.

Fighting under layers of the old broken into an undeveloped new.

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Poem 31 of the My Poor Lady Collection by Ellasophia 🌸✨💚

I missed her happy smile shown bright even on a worse day. A bright mood that held hope. That didn’t let the life force make her stuck.

Who always seemed to believe in possibilities. Who didn’t view the world with such unease. Who believed in love by any means.

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Poem 31 of the My Poor Lady Collection by Ellasophia 🌸✨💚

I found myself working, unfulfilled. Head broken, with pieces spilled around. Body shaken to the ground. Everything jumbled.

My old mixed with my new. No pathway back to finding my old. It was lost. Or maybe dissolved into a new. I missed her.

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Poem 31 of the My Poor Lady Collection by Ellasophia 🌸✨💚

My body ache.

Sharp pain in the pit of my stomach reach the tip of my toes. Brain harden in its cage, pounding and pounding against the walls.

The lava flow rigidly through my veins.

A fire. It set a fire to whatever it touch. Running along the rivers of my gut.

It scorch a few spots in the midst.

My eyes roll back, as my body shake in quiet discontent.

Poem 30 of the My Poor Lady Collection by Ellasophia 🌸✨💚

I feel my calm slipping away,

just as fast as it hath came.

Please don’t leave me in this state.

Let me rest now,

maybe dawn hath bring a new day.

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Poem 29 of the My Poor Lady Collection by Ellasophia 🌸✨💚

So I lay there, as my droplets try to put the fire out.

Then I arose from a sleep unknown. The time passes by. I feel a calm.

Who giveth to me? I worry for who giveth can taketh from me. As they do so often.

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Poem 29 of the My Poor Lady Collection by Ellasophia 🌸✨💚

I lay still a while, reaching, trying, to hold on to a vision in my head.

Pure vision of joy and love, until the other thoughts creep in. A fire sent disrupting the new and old as it pass by.

No need to slow itself down, there was little else to destroy now. Little left of me to be coy now.

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Poem 29 of the My Poor Lady Collection by Ellasophia 🌸✨💚

My own heart break

when it hears my mind speaking.

The abuse to myself

stop my own heart beating.

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Poem 29 of the My Poor Lady Collection by Ellasophia 🌸✨💚

life wasn't worried if you could love me, it was worried if i could love you. it was never that you would run from me, but that i would run from you.

for love placed desire in my heart, while fear chiseled pain inside my mind.

it knew you could love me easily, but easily I could not love you.

that i'd run and run, scarring you deeply along the way. while my own heart decay. but all life wanted was to give us both a beautiful love where in trust we'd always stay. One that fear could never persuade.

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