A Witch Queen and her Army of Darkness

[theevilwitchqueen]

I used to spend a lot of time and energy in evil spells to corrupt the minds of virtuous knights, but to be quite honest, most of the time you just need to whisper in their ear and pull their hair a little.

[aquaticsong]

Tell me about it, sis. I was hesitant about coming so far inland at first - figured I'd be at a disadvantage without my siren song, you know - but I didn't even need it. Such a pretty knight fell in my lap right away. And he has so much hair I can pull. dreamy sigh

[theevilwitchqueen]

Oooh, we should bring out our prettiest knights and have a pool party sometime. I already miss my beach vacation days!

[theevilwitchqueen]

I used to spend a lot of time and energy in evil spells to corrupt the minds of virtuous knights, but to be quite honest, most of the time you just need to whisper in their ear and pull their hair a little.

[respectmakiitoh]

[fae-prince-carnelian]

@theevilwitchqueen

[theevilwitchqueen]

You, I like you.

[ex0skeletal-undead]

The Masque of the Red Death, sculpture by Emil Melmoth

[theevilwitchqueen]

The reason why the Knight Protective Services criticize me so much is because they hate successful women.

[basicbascinet]

No?? You are literally evil????

[theevilwitchqueen]

Oh, I see, when you hang out with an evil baron and an evil adviser that's just a title, but an evil queen is suddenly a problem.

Misogyny.

[basicbascinet]

THEY DON'T MELT PEOPLE

[theevilwitchqueen]

I'm being blamed for men's lack of ability

[theevilwitchqueen]

The reason why the Knight Protective Services criticize me so much is because they hate successful women.

[basicbascinet]

No?? You are literally evil????

[theevilwitchqueen]

Oh, I see, when you hang out with an evil baron and an evil adviser that's just a title, but an evil queen is suddenly a problem.

Misogyny.

[theevilwitchqueen]

The reason why the Knight Protective Services criticize me so much is because they hate successful women.

[theevilwitchqueen]

Speaking of crystal balls, I can stop buying new ones whenever I want. I just want to be able to observe all my potential enemies. And allies. And their pets. Simultaneously.

[theevilwitchqueen]

If *I* were to organize an event it would have been *so* much better than the Bloodhaven Ball:

Undead would be welcome and encouraged in their depravities against life and nature.

Jousts? Yawn! Boring! I'd have knights fight horrors in a gladiatorial pit. Without armor, for extra bloodshed.

The stag hunt was a charming idea, but it lacked real weapons to up the stakes. Loved the surprise bear, though!

No real party is complete without a fully equipped torture dungeon and unethical magic experiments facility. That's just common sense!

Because I'm not a coward, there would be several orgy rooms.

[most-mid-lady-in-the-land]

I LIKE YOU, YOUR MAJESTY!!!! you have a certain pizzaz that i greatly admire. also i have a feeling you might have loved Girls Night: Hostage Situation at the ball though…..

[theevilwitchqueen]

Oh, I did love it, darling. I had crystal balls observing the event from various angles and you girls had me *very* interested.

[theevilwitchqueen]

If *I* were to organize an event it would have been *so* much better than the Bloodhaven Ball:

Undead would be welcome and encouraged in their depravities against life and nature.

Jousts? Yawn! Boring! I'd have knights fight horrors in a gladiatorial pit. Without armor, for extra bloodshed.

The stag hunt was a charming idea, but it lacked real weapons to up the stakes. Loved the surprise bear, though!

No real party is complete without a fully equipped torture dungeon and unethical magic experiments facility. That's just common sense!

Because I'm not a coward, there would be several orgy rooms.

[basicbascinet]

Nobody even likes your parties! People just go because they are terrified of what will happen if they don't!

[theevilwitchqueen]

Your point being? That just means the threats are working.

[theevilwitchqueen]

If *I* were to organize an event it would have been *so* much better than the Bloodhaven Ball:

Undead would be welcome and encouraged in their depravities against life and nature.

Jousts? Yawn! Boring! I'd have knights fight horrors in a gladiatorial pit. Without armor, for extra bloodshed.

The stag hunt was a charming idea, but it lacked real weapons to up the stakes. Loved the surprise bear, though!

No real party is complete without a fully equipped torture dungeon and unethical magic experiments facility. That's just common sense!

Because I'm not a coward, there would be several orgy rooms.

[your-evil-adviser]

... feel free to either submit your suggestions in writing, or conduct your own Ball, Your Majesty (?).

Also, there was a torture dungeon (I think) and several orgy rooms. Several more than intended.

[theevilwitchqueen]

Excuse me, darling, I must have heard it wrong. For a second it sounded like you were questioning our royal title, won through many years of dedicated conquest and usurpation. But of course, a polite young man like you that doesn't want his bones liquefied would never imply that!

Well, if there was a torture dungeon available it was not properly advertised! I must point out, though, that rooms where people happen to have sex is not the same as dedicated rooms for the purposes of collective perversion.

[theevilwitchqueen]

If *I* were to organize an event it would have been *so* much better than the Bloodhaven Ball:

Undead would be welcome and encouraged in their depravities against life and nature.

Jousts? Yawn! Boring! I'd have knights fight horrors in a gladiatorial pit. Without armor, for extra bloodshed.

The stag hunt was a charming idea, but it lacked real weapons to up the stakes. Loved the surprise bear, though!

No real party is complete without a fully equipped torture dungeon and unethical magic experiments facility. That's just common sense!

Because I'm not a coward, there would be several orgy rooms.

[theevilwitchqueen]

I have melted the ones responsible for the accursed light orange "universal color" SPF.

Worship me in gratitude!

[theevilwitchqueen]

Back from vacation with the babe! Unfortunately she wouldn't agree to wearing a swimsuit :( Still gorgeous though!! #beachvacay #beachwaves #witchqueenlife #fps666

[basicbascinet]

All considered, things could be worse.

[theevilwitchqueen]

Becsyy, I'm ba-aaack~