This is not a poem, a story or a structured piece of literature. This is a dive into my mind, a dive into a broken heart that's trying to recover from a mentally and emotionally abusive relationship.
These are raw, unfiltered thoughts. I let my mind spill whatever it wanted to on this digital paper. These are feelings of hurt, regret, and most importantly, anger. I hope this piece makes you feel something and helps you make better choices when it comes to romance.
Tw: mentions of suicide and murder
If I was given the floor to speak and pour out my emotions without any consequences or condemnation, I would probably start by explaining how stupid or sad I feel. I don't think I've been genuinely happy for a while now.
Why am I the one always being taken advantage of? Why do people take my kindness for weakness? Why do foolish people think they can play on my intelligence? Why do I turn up as the villain in the story every single time?
Am I doing something wrong? Is there anything wrong with me? Am I stupid? Should i take my life and just get it over with?
The struggle of having no one in your corner, the deep sinking feeling of seasonal depression, the regret you feel when you knew that it wasn't going to work out but you took that chance, you made the decision, and now it's back to punch you in the face.
That idiot never really deserved me. What the hell was I thinking? This is why I continue to ask if I'm stupid. Lowered my standards for what exactly? To raise someone else's son? To teach a grown man basic emotional intelligence and maturity? To be hidden like I was a thing of shame? To be constantly told to stop being myself because it was "embarrassing"? To be looked down on because being with him immediately made me "ran through" and "loose"? What the fuck was I thinking seeing the good in a man whore?
I get too carried away and let my emotions get the best of me sometimes. I think everyone is as good of a person as I am.
God forbid I ever let a man project his insecurities on me ever again. God forbid I have to beg a man to be chalant and give me emotional security. God forbid I ever let a man tell me to my face that I should allow him sleep with other girls outside because I wasn't ready for sex. God forbid I give a man the chance to accuse me of stealing from him. God forbid I ever date a scam-ass-419-yahoo nigga ever again. God forbid I ever get with a man that weaponized my emotional vulnerability and turned me talking about my discomfort into arguments. God forbid I still stay when a man tells me he doesn't deserve me and feels like he'll hurt me. God forbid I still stay when a man is comfortable going the whole day without talking to me. God forbid I get with a man who thinks showing his emotions makes him weak. God forbid I ever get with a narcissist ever again.
God forbid I get with a man who doesn't want to be seen with me in public. God forbid I ever let a man make me rethink my worth. God forbid I put a man in the place of God in my life. God forbid I get with a man who's comfortable with seeing me cry and tells me it's fucking crocodile tears. Fucking bastard. God forbid I ever get with a man who is too pussy to defend me in front of his friends. God forbid i ever let a man feel comfortable enough to discuss his desire to have baby mamas in my presence ever again.
God forbid i ever do as much as boil water in an electric kettle for a man ever again. God forbid i put myself in a position where people have to come and tell me to open my eyes. God forbid i get with a man with such fragile masculinity that he can't even carry my bags or let me take cute videos of him. God forbid i get with a substance addicted nigga. God forbid i try to give a man love that his parents didn't give him. God forbid i let a nigga below 6'0 play me like this ever again. God forbid i so much as give the fool as little as a glance if I'm ever in the same room as him.
God please strike me down if i ever think of being with a man that doesn't believe in the Gospel of Jesus Christ again. God forbid i get with a man who raises his voice at me and calls me stupid. God forbid i date a man who tells me he might cheat and i should forgive him if he does. Olodo. God forbid I ever put myself in the space where I initiate and carry the emotional weight AGAIN.
I should know better. 2018 and 2021 taught me better. I just love seeing the good in people. That bitch doesn't deserve love and I sincerely hope he never finds it.
Was I wrong to want to help him grow? Was I wrong to see the good in him? Am I his fucking mother bro what is even wrong with me? I need to be stopped because the fuck is this build-a-man NGO I have going on?
I didn't spread the Gospel or read my bible. But I spent 7 months of my life crying over a weak ass man. And the relationship only lasted 4 months. For what? A nigga who couldn't even get me wet? A low self esteem ridden ass bitch? Funny how I made him better in every sense but I remained stagnant. I regressed even.
Fake ass sapiosexual your emotions control you girl. Next time find yourself someone who can equally pour into you. Try again 2035. Maybe by then Bang Chan from Stray Kids would be a real candidate. MY MAN MY MAN!
Why is murder a crime? Sometimes I wish I could just drive to that nigga house and put bullets in his skull because the fuck do you take me for? Sometimes I wanna show him why my father is my father. This 19 year old canon event shit almost took me the fuck out.
It's the way he definitely thought i was stupid, soft and had nothing else going for me with the way he would comfortably and conveniently dissapear and shut me out of his life when he felt wronged, leaving me in the dark and desperately trying to reach out to him, then he would stroll back into my life two weeks later when he was over his bitch fit and I would allow him every single time.
There's probably a lot of things I missed and I wish I could continue, but there's food waiting for me and God forbid I don't eat because of anything that has to do with a man.
This is not a poem, a story or a structured piece of literature. This is a dive into my mind, a dive into a broken heart that's trying to recover from a mentally and emotionally abusive relationship.
These are raw, unfiltered thoughts. I let my mind spill whatever it wanted to on this digital paper. These are feelings of hurt, regret, and most importantly, anger. I hope this piece makes you feel something and helps you make better choices when it comes to romance.
Tw: mentions of suicide and murder
If I was given the floor to speak and pour out my emotions without any consequences or condemnation, I would probably start by explaining how stupid or sad I feel. I don't think I've been genuinely happy for a while now.
Why am I the one always being taken advantage of? Why do people take my kindness for weakness? Why do foolish people think they can play on my intelligence? Why do I turn up as the villain in the story every single time?
Am I doing something wrong? Is there anything wrong with me? Am I stupid? Should i take my life and just get it over with?
The struggle of having no one in your corner, the deep sinking feeling of seasonal depression, the regret you feel when you knew that it wasn't going to work out but you took that chance, you made the decision, and now it's back to punch you in the face.
That idiot never really deserved me. What the hell was I thinking? This is why I continue to ask if I'm stupid. Lowered my standards for what exactly? To raise someone else's son? To teach a grown man basic emotional intelligence and maturity? To be hidden like I was a thing of shame? To be constantly told to stop being myself because it was "embarrassing"? To be looked down on because being with him immediately made me "ran through" and "loose"? What the fuck was I thinking seeing the good in a man whore?
I get too carried away and let my emotions get the best of me sometimes. I think everyone is as good of a person as I am.
God forbid I ever let a man project his insecurities on me ever again. God forbid I have to beg a man to be chalant and give me emotional security. God forbid I ever let a man tell me to my face that I should allow him sleep with other girls outside because I wasn't ready for sex. God forbid I give a man the chance to accuse me of stealing from him. God forbid I ever date a scam-ass-419-yahoo nigga ever again. God forbid I ever get with a man that weaponized my emotional vulnerability and turned me talking about my discomfort into arguments. God forbid I still stay when a man tells me he doesn't deserve me and feels like he'll hurt me. God forbid I still stay when a man is comfortable going the whole day without talking to me. God forbid I get with a man who thinks showing his emotions makes him weak. God forbid I ever get with a narcissist ever again.
God forbid I get with a man who doesn't want to be seen with me in public. God forbid I ever let a man make me rethink my worth. God forbid I put a man in the place of God in my life. God forbid I get with a man who's comfortable with seeing me cry and tells me it's fucking crocodile tears. Fucking bastard. God forbid I ever get with a man who is too pussy to defend me in front of his friends. God forbid i ever let a man feel comfortable enough to discuss his desire to have baby mamas in my presence ever again.
God forbid i ever do as much as boil water in an electric kettle for a man ever again. God forbid i put myself in a position where people have to come and tell me to open my eyes. God forbid i get with a man with such fragile masculinity that he can't even carry my bags or let me take cute videos of him. God forbid i get with a substance addicted nigga. God forbid i try to give a man love that his parents didn't give him. God forbid i let a nigga below 6'0 play me like this ever again. God forbid i so much as give the fool as little as a glance if I'm ever in the same room as him.
God please strike me down if i ever think of being with a man that doesn't believe in the Gospel of Jesus Christ again. God forbid i get with a man who raises his voice at me and calls me stupid. God forbid i date a man who tells me he might cheat and i should forgive him if he does. Olodo. God forbid I ever put myself in the space where I initiate and carry the emotional weight AGAIN.
I should know better. 2018 and 2021 taught me better. I just love seeing the good in people. That bitch doesn't deserve love and I sincerely hope he never finds it.
Was I wrong to want to help him grow? Was I wrong to see the good in him? Am I his fucking mother bro what is even wrong with me? I need to be stopped because the fuck is this build-a-man NGO I have going on?
I didn't spread the Gospel or read my bible. But I spent 7 months of my life crying over a weak ass man. And the relationship only lasted 4 months. For what? A nigga who couldn't even get me wet? A low self esteem ridden ass bitch? Funny how I made him better in every sense but I remained stagnant. I regressed even.
Fake ass sapiosexual your emotions control you girl. Next time find yourself someone who can equally pour into you. Try again 2035. Maybe by then Bang Chan from Stray Kids would be a real candidate. MY MAN MY MAN!
Why is murder a crime? Sometimes I wish I could just drive to that nigga house and put bullets in his skull because the fuck do you take me for? Sometimes I wanna show him why my father is my father. This 19 year old canon event shit almost took me the fuck out.
It's the way he definitely thought i was stupid, soft and had nothing else going for me with the way he would comfortably and conveniently dissapear and shut me out of his life when he felt wronged, leaving me in the dark and desperately trying to reach out to him, then he would stroll back into my life two weeks later when he was over his bitch fit and I would allow him every single time.
There's probably a lot of things I missed and I wish I could continue, but there's food waiting for me and God forbid I don't eat because of anything that has to do with a man.
I haven't uploaded since June last year, that's actually quite crazy.
Truth is i got into uni and studying performance art is really not for the weak I fear.
I also lost a relative and went through a major personality death.
Sadly with no time for myself, I lost interest in every single thing I like, including K-pop. I still love the groups and the music but I just find myself being less of a hard stan and involved in the community.
And lastly, I've been going through a bad break-up for about 3 months now
I literally lost myself and lost my spark...
This series of events has led me to want to start writing again but with different content now. Content that depicts how I feel and is just simply an expression of my psyche at this point in time. I'm going to rebrand.
I opened the app and saw how much recognition my old fics are still getting and it truly warms my heart. I'm very grateful.
I hope you guys stick around to start this new journey with me!
Summary: Your boyfriend says he's stressed from work, so you help him relieve it.
Warnings: Smut included MINORS DNI. Fluff, aftercare, established relationship, sub chan?, dom reader?, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), use of pet names like "honey," "baby," etc. Creampie, reader is a bit mean and Chan is a big man baby.
MORE UNDER THE CUT!
You were waiting for your boyfriend to get back home from work and counting down the hours till he did because you were worried about him.
You were worried because you texted him earlier in the day to ask how work was going and what he wanted to eat when he got back home.
He replied to you, saying he was stressed, couldn't wait to come back home, and that he didn't know what he wanted to eat just yet.
You told him to give you a call when he figured it out and wished him luck with work.
He called you a few hours later to tell you not to worry about him because he ended up getting dinner with the boys and was already on his way home.
You had dinner on your own and went upstairs to take a shower. Just as you were coming back down to do the dishes, you heard a key turn in the lock. Your baby was back.
"Hi honey." You said to him as he came in.
"Hi baby." He said and gave you a long tight hug plus a peck on your forehead.
You would never get tired of the way he smelt. That musky scent of his sweat mixed with perfume was so intoxicating that it clouded your brain in the best way possible.
"You good?" You asked him as he took off his hands from your waist.
"Yeah, I am, just a little tired, that's all." He said and started making his way upstairs.
"I'm gonna go take a shower then go to bed wanna join me?" He asked from the top of the stairs.
"I thought you said you were tired? And no, I just took one."
"Boo, you're so boring." He replied.
"Stop being a child Chan, go take your your shower." You said.
"Okay, mom." He scoffed.
You weren't looking at him, but you just knew he rolled his eyes before going into your shared bedroom to take his shower. He was such a child sometimes.
You made some hot chocolate for both of you and took it upstairs to your room.
On getting there, you met him putting on a black tank top, and he threw his black chrome hearts hoodie over it. The weather was pretty cold.
"Here you go." You said, handing him a mug, and the two of you retired to the bed.
"What made you so stressed at work today anyway?" You asked.
"I don't know how, but I lost a track, and it happened to be one I didn't backup, so we have to start recording all over again." You don't know why, but you laughed a bit after he said that.
"Are you laughing? What's so funny y/n?" He asked cocking an eyebrow.
"I don't know bro why didn't you back the file up?" You asked, still laughing.
"It's not funny, y/n." He said, looking angry.
"Okay, okay, I'm sorry." You said and got on him, so you were straddling him.
"Aww, you look so tired, my baby. You need to sleep." You said while pushing his hair away from his forehead so you could leave a peck on it.
Just as you were about to get off your boyfriend so he could get some rest, he used his hands to hold your hips in place.
"Y/n, don't go." He said when you turned to look at him.
"Don't tell me you want another forehead kiss, Chris." You said trying to act cool like a volcano didn't erupt in your stomach, and your kit kat wasn't dripping.
"I like it when you get mad and call me Chris." He said with that cheeky smile you fell for every single time. You just couldn't help it.
"You're so annoying, just go to be -" You couldn't even finish your sentence before he cut you off with a kiss.
"Mhm." You couldn't help but moan. His lips were so soft and warm, and his tongue moved against yours so perfectly every thought in your head vanished.
He started moving your hips back and forth on his crotch and you almost reached the road of no return, but you came back to your senses.
"Wait, chan, we can't be doing this. You're stressed, and you need to rest before you go back to work tomorrow." You said.
"Help me relieve my stress y/n you're the one who can." He said, maintaining eye contact with his beady eyes that you hated so much. Fuck him he knew how to get you and he used his tricks every single time he had the chance to.
"Okay, you got me, but I'll do all the work. Don't move a muscle, okay?" He nodded his head in agreement and you went back to kissing him.
When you felt he was hard enough, and you were wet enough you got off him to take your shorts off, and he took his pants off to reveal his cock and his tip was already glistening with precum.
You were so tempted to take him in your mouth, but you wanted this to be as fast as possible, so you scratched that thought.
You climbed back on top of him and then used your hand to position his cock at your entrance.
"Ah fuck y/n." Chan moaned as he slipped inside you and you gasped as you felt him fill you up.
You held on to the headboard of your bed for more support and started moving up and down slowly to gain a set rhythm.
Once you set the pace for your self you started going faster. You were cock drunk with the way he was stretching you out and hitting your sweet spot every time you came down. You were seeing stars.
"Fuck y/n I'm not going to last if you keep on doing this." Chan said and held your hips to slow you down.
"Good because the idea isn't for you to last." You said and took his hands off you.
You bent down to give him a kiss while rotating your hips and grinding on his cock.
"It feels so good chan. Oh my God." Your legs almost gave up on you right there and then, but you remembered that if you couldn't go on chan would take control and that would defeat the whole point of you doing this so you held on to the headboard for support and went back to the previous pace you set for yourself.
After a while Chan's groans started getting louder, and he started bucking up in to you so you knew he was about to cum.
"Fuck y/n." He groaned as he held your hips down and coated your walls white."
"Mhmm." You moaned as you rode him off his high, and went back down to kiss him before you got off to lie on the bed.
You both let out a sigh once your back hit the bed and chan pulled you in to plant a kiss on your lips.
He had that cheeky smile that you hated on his face again because he knew he won. You wished you could slap it off him.
"You love me so much." He said, teasing you.
"No, I don't, go to bed." You said and turned away from him.
"Come here." He said while laughing and pulled you close to him.
"What?" You asked after turning back to face him.
"I love you." He said while placing his head on your chest and wrapping an arm around your waist.
"I know." You replied, not wanting to give into him a second time.
"Say it back." He said.
"No." You shot back at him.
Your boyfriend just loved being a little shit and annoying the fuck out of you, so he did the best thing he could think of which was tickling you because he knew you hated it.
"Okay, okay, chan, stop, I love you too." You said through tears from laughing too much.
"Goodnight, y/n." He said.
"Goodnight, Chan." You replied and ran your hands through his hair till you both fell asleep.
Summary: Your boyfriend gets mad at work and you offer a way for him to relieve his stress.
Warnings: smut included MINORS DNI. Mean/hard dom jeongin, sub reader, daddy kink, degradation/ praise (reader receives.), impact play, dumbification? Semi public sex? Overstim, creampie, unprotected sex (please do not do it.) Mentions of other members of skz.
Let me know if there's anything I missed! ♡
You went to the company with your boyfriend today because you were bored alone at home every day after he left for work, so today you begged him to let you tag along, and surprisingly, he agreed.
You watched as he and the members did a dance routine over and over again, and you were beginning to wonder if they had to go through this every day. No wonder your boyfriend always came home exhausted.
You sat at one corner of the practice room watching them, and your eyes fell on your boyfriend, who was now drenched in sweat and had his sleeves rolled up, exposing his contracting arm muscles.
Fuck.
His hair was wet, and he looked so sexy when he was serious. You subconsciously crossed your legs and tried to distract yourself by watching some tik toks.
"Can you just leave me alone? I'm tired!" You heard your boyfriend's voice echo round the room, and you looked up from your phone to see what all the fuss was about.
"You're not the only one who's tired here. I.N, at least do the dance right so we can move on to the next phase." His colleague Lee know snapped right back at him, and things were not looking so good.
"Hey, hey guys, don't fight. Let's just carry on with the choreo, please." Felix appealed to them, but his request fell on deaf ears.
"Tell him to stop complaining about every single thing I do it's annoying." Jeongin said to Felix.
"If one person looks bad, the whole team looks bad, and I'm just trying to make sure you're on the same page as us, you selfish asshole." Lee know might have just added fuel to the fire with that comment because your boyfriend raised a fist to him but just before he could do anything or you could call out to him a loud voice resonated through the room.
"Everybody stop!" It was bangchan. The leader of the group. You were a little scared because you had never seen him like that before, but it worked because the commotion did, in fact, stop.
"What do you guys think you're doing right now, huh?" He said to Lee know and your boyfriend.
Lee know opened his mouth like he was about to say something, but chan shut him down before he could.
"I don't wanna hear it. Everybody take 5." He said that, and everyone, including him, left the room, but your boyfriend stayed back.
"Baby, are you okay?" You asked, getting up from the corner where you sat.
He didn't answer you and just kept on wiping his face with a towel.
"Jeongin, answer me. Are you okay?" You asked again.
"No, I'm not. I'm tired and frustrated. You saw everything that happened." He had made his way onto one of the couches in the practice room, and just the way he sat was making you horny again.
He was reclined on the couch with his legs spread wide, and he was wearing a pair of shorts so you could see his thighs, and you had never wanted to ride them more than in that moment.
"You can take it out on me." You said before you even realised it.
Your boyfriend's head shot up from the frame of the couch he had rested his head on.
"C'mere." He said as he pulled you onto his lap. You were now straddling him.
"Say that again for me, princess." He said while tucking your hair behind your ear and looking straight into your eyes."
"I- I want you to take your frustration out on me... to relieve to of your stress." You said already getting wet from just sitting on him.
"Oh you dirty slut." He said as he grabbed your neck and pulled you in for a kiss."
"Wait what about the others?" You asked him turning to face the door of the practice room.
"We have 15 minutes." He said and pulled you into the kiss.
Your boyfriend was being completely ruthless with you and took full control of your mouth with his tongue.
You started to grind against him for friction, but he stopped you and lifted you up from his thighs, so you were kneeling and not sitting.
All you could do was moan, and you got even louder when he lifted up the skirt you were wearing and smacked you particularly hard on the ass.
"You like that, huh?" He asked as he broke away from the kiss and landed another hard smack on your bare ass.
"When I speak to you, you answer me." He said as he landed what you think was the hardest one yet.
"Yes, Daddy." You said choking back tears.
"That's my good girl." He said as he wrapped his hand around your throat and pulled you in for a kiss again.
He pulled out his dick from his shorts and began to stroke it. He then put his fingers on your panties to see if you were wet, and you most definitely were so he didn't waste any time moving them to the side and placing you on his dick.
"Ahhh." You whined as he slipped into you. You already knew your boyfriend was big, but for some reason, you felt like he was stretching you out more than usual.
He had his hands on both sides of your hips and began to move you up and down his length.
Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, and it was almost like you could feel every vein and ridge on his dick.
"Ride me." Your boyfriend commanded, and you groaned from the loss of movement because he had taken his hands off your hips.
Your boyfriend knew you couldn't last for 5 minutes on top but he was a sadistic fucker and loved to see you suffer.
You began to bounce up and down his length, and your boyfriend threw his head back.
"Yeah, just like that, baby keep going." He said in a raspy voice and landed a light smack on your ass.
You felt your legs already starting to give out after a while and as if your boyfriend knew he started thrusting up into you from below and he did so fast while landing hard slaps on your ass.
"Fuck fuck fuck please daddy please." You have no idea what you were begging for because it hurt so good you couldn't think straight.
Your boyfriend turned you over so you were now laying on the chair and he was on top.
"Listen to me princess we can't be too loud okay? Take it quietly like a good girl."
You nodded your head and he pushed his dick back into you and choked you restricting just a bit of your airflow.
He was slamming into your cunt so hard and fast you began to see stars. Your moans were getting louder and you forgot that he had told you to be quiet.
You felt a sting on your left cheek and you realised that he had slapped you for disobeying his instructions.
"I told you to be quiet you whore. Do you want people to hear you getting fucked?" He asked you.
"No, Daddy." You managed to blurt out through tears.
"Good." And as he said that, he parted your lips and spit in your mouth, then gave you another slap.
He continued to slam into you but it was impossible for you to say quiet so he now had a hand over your mouth while he continued the assault on your cunt.
"Who's daddy's little cumslut?." He asked after a while and you were too fucked out to answer so your boyfriend brought you back to your senses with another slap.
"Me daddy it's me." You cried out.
"Okay now you're gonna take my cum like the slut you are." As he said that he pressed further into you and filled you with his seed.
You both stayed in that position for about two minutes till you started hearing voices coming towards the practice room.
"Just in time." Your boyfriend said and pulled out of you.
"Keep it in till we get back home." He said as he tapped your thighs and put his dick back into his pants.
"We'll finish things up there." He said and left to join the others.
Summary: Your boyfriend decided it would be fun to see how long you could hold up with a vibrator in you for the entire day.
Warnings: Smut included (MINORS DNI.), soft dom chan, sub reader, use of sex toys, semi public sex?, edging/overstim, unprotected sex (I'm sure y'all don't want babies)
You and your boyfriend were what people would call adventurous, risk takers, and maybe even crazy.
You couldn't disagree with them though because you were out in public, a club to be precise, with a vibrator deep in your pussy, and your boyfriend was constantly playing with the controls making you drop down at different intervals.
How did you get here? Well, it started as kind of a "punishment" for you being too feisty earlier today, and you had it in you all morning while doing your chores.
You were also very stubborn and told chan that you'd be able to take it just to get a reaction out of him, and you got what you wanted when he suggested that you keep it in for the whole day.
"But aren't we going out today?" You asked your boyfriend.
"What difference does that make?" He replied to your question with a question.
"Aren't people gonna know?" You asked.
"How would they know? Is this you trying to say you can't take it?" He knew exactly how to make you agree with him.
"I don't know how many times I'm going to tell you that I can take it, Chan." You said in a bit of a rude tone, and he turned up the settings just to make you eat your words.
"Okay, then be quiet and take it like a good girl." He said and placed a kiss on your forehead, then went to go do whatever he was doing.
Your boyfriend left the vibrator in the same setting for a while, and that made you think he had forgotten about you.
Just as you were celebrating internally, he turned the setting up as if he knew and you started having trouble standing.
He took it back to the lowest setting after a while and called you upstairs, where he told you to get on the bed.
You got so happy because you thought he was finally going to give in and fuck you.
You were so pathetic. You moaned just from him spreading your legs, and all this man did was take out the vibrator.
He was insane. Your pussy was pulsing and clenching around nothing and he didn't seem to care.
"Don't wanna wear you out too much before we leave." He said as he took it out of you.
Your boyfriend might have been mean, but he wasn't evil.
You both started getting ready to leave, and he called you to his work desk when you were fully dressed.
"Baby, can you come here for me." He said, tapping his desk.
When you sat down, you guys had a mini make-out sesh to prep you for the vibrator.
"Are you ready?" He asked you.
You nodded your head, and he proceeded to put it in you.
"I'm not going to turn it on till we get there, okay?" He said while you guys were in the car.
He actually stayed true to his words and turned it on just as you were getting out of the car.
You almost fell, and you heard him laugh from the front seat.
You were so not going to survive this.
You both went out with friends and naturally split into groups of men and women, so everyone was doing their own thing.
You were having a drink and a conversation with your girls when you felt the setting go a bit higher, and you almost choked.
"Y/n, are you okay?" Your friend Melanie asked you, looking concerned.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Drink almost went down the wrong pipe, that's all." You reassured your friend.
You looked around the crowd of people in search of your boyfriend, and you caught him laughing and drinking with his friends well aware of the suffering he was causing you.
Time passed, and chan was going up and down with the controls, which made you lie to your girls and tell them you were beginning to get a slight tummy ache.
You managed to keep on dancing, but it seemed chan wasn't too happy with that because he turned it up to the highest setting, and this time, he left it there.
"Oh my God." You said, and you had to squat because you really couldn't take it anymore. So much for all your smack talk.
Tears were beginning to well up in your eyes.
"Y/n, are you sure you're okay?" Your friend Melanie asked you again.
You shook your head in a no motion, and the next thing you knew, Melanie was going to get chan for you.
The next thing you felt were two strong hands picking you off the floor, and you knew it was Chan.
"Let's go." He said into your ear and dragged you along with him.
That was how you ended up in the bathrooms.
"Oh, baby, don't cry." He said as he placed you on the counter and wiped your tears.
"Do you want me to take it out?" He asked you sounding concerned, but you knew it was all fake. He loved seeing you suffer.
You nodded your head and at your signal chan reached under the black mini dress you were wearing, slid your panties to the side, and then took the vibrator out, making you moan.
"Chan, please." You said after he put the vibrator in his pocket and was about to leave.
"Please, what?" He asked you.
"I need you." You replied.
"Okay, baby, let's get back home first."
"No Chan please I need you now." You whined.
"But we can't go here, baby someone might walk in." He said while leaving kisses all over your neck.
He was getting you too riled up for someone who was disagreeing.
"It doesn't matter." You told him.
"Oh, you naughty girl. Come here." You finally got what you wanted as chan wrapped a hand around your throat and started kissing you hungrily. You couldn't help but moan.
He brought you down from the counter and helped you take off your panties.
"Baby, I'm going to need you to be quiet for me, okay?" He parted your lips, scrunched your underwear, and then put it into your mouth to act as a gag.
He then turned you around and bent you over the counter. He rolled your dress up so your ass and cunt were exposed to him and you heard him groan.
He gave himself a few pumps and told you he was going to be fast.
It was almost as if you weren't stretched out and violently edged for hours because all chan could talk about was how tight you were and how well you wrapped around his cock.
Chan was moving in and out of you fast and hard, and he just knew how to hit that spot.
The panty he shoved in your mouth was practically useless because he had to use one hand to cover your mouth, too.
It wasn't your fault he was a literal sex god.
Chan let you cum so easily he probably felt bad about edging you for so long. Your legs were shaking at your release, and he took your panties out of your mouth and put them in his pocket.
He pulled your dress down and wiped your tears. Plus, a kiss on your forehead. He always gave you kisses whenever you guys were done.
"Let's go home." He said to you.
"What about our friends?" You asked him because it'd be rude to leave without letting them know.
"We'll tell them that you got sick, let's go." You both made your way to the car.
There was just something about chan. He always made sure you finished first or together. He didn't bother if he didn't get to. He always said he was happy as long as you did.
"Chan, you didn't finish." You said as you buckled your seat belt.
"It's fine. I'm good as long as you're good." He said while starting the engine.
"Use me." You said to him.
"Huh?" He asked you.
"Fuck me the way you want to and use me to cum." You told him meaning every bit of it.
"Fuck." Chan said and took off his seat belt.
Thank God it was late in the night, and your windows were tinted.
Summary: You and your boyfriend got into a huge fight and you have a "special" way of reconciling.
Warnings: smut included (Minors dni). Hard dom/possessive chan, angst, angry/makeup sex, bratty sub reader, overstim/edging, unprotected sex (don't be silly wrap your willy.) Drew inspiration from Chan's bbl messages if you can tell hahaha.
More under the cut!!
Well, this honeymoon phase ended pretty quickly. How did you and your boyfriend go from finding everything adorable and cute to fighting every now and then?
You could still live with it. It was just the usual couple bickering, and it always ended with you bent over the kitchen counter or squirming under your boyfriend, so a win was a win for you.
But it never got this bad. This time, voices were raised, and insults were bouncing off the walls of your apartment.
"Y/n, I don't have time for this. Just leave me alone." Your boyfriend Chan said standing right in front of you.
"What do you mean you don't have time for this when you started it!?" Why was he pulling the victim card when he instigated this mess?
"What the fuck did I start y/n?" He was really acting innocent.
"Well, for starters, you pulled me out of a party and yelled at me in public, insinuating that i was cheating on you while you were right there? That was so embarrassing. You're being such an immature dick right now." You said.
"I'm immature? How did you expect me to react when you were basically fucking another guy just 10 inches away from me huh? Don't act stupid because I know you aren't." Okay, maybe the dance you shared with your former classmate did get a bit too intimate, but you shut it down once you saw he was getting the wrong idea.
Your boyfriend was kind of (really) overreacting right now.
"Did you just call me stupid?" You asked him cocking an eyebrow.
"Y/n I didn't call you stupid. I said, "Don't act like it." Use your head." Oh, he was actually calling you stupid.
"You're being so fucking dramatic right now Chan. You asked me who he was, and I told you he was a former classmate from high school. I told you that I fucking shut it down when I noticed he was getting the wrong message..."
"You yelled at me in PUBLIC Chan fucking hell I am not a child or your property I'm a grown woman who can think and speak for herself."
"Okay, then y/n go think for yourself into someone else's pants I don't want to have this conversation anymore." There was no way he was being serious.
"You are such an insecure bitch, I hate you so much. I can't stand you." You said.
"Then I'll leave then. Let's talk tomorrow because you're clearly confused." He turned and picked up his car keys from a tiny bowl on the kitchen island and proceeded to the door.
"No. Who said anything about tomorrow? Don't come back till you're ready to accept the fact that you're wrong and apologise to me." He stopped in his tracks and turned to face you.
"Now that's where you have it wrong. I won't be back until YOU apologise to me and cut off all contact with that guy whatshisface..." Wow, so you were both dropping ultimatums now okay.
"He has a name, and it's Brandon." You corrected him, and just at the perfectly wrong timing, you received a call, and it was Brandon. Chan took a look at your phone and laughed.
"Oh fuck off y/n." He walked out and closed the door behind him then you heard his car zoom off.
Good riddance.
You called Brandon back, and the poor guy was only calling to apologise for causing war between you and your boyfriend and even offered to speak to him on your behalf but you told him not to bother.
Not that it would even work. That would only make things worse between you and chan.
You slept it off and woke up the next day expecting to see texts and missed calls from your boyfriend, but you got nothing.
You were a bit hurt because part of you hoped that he would come crawling back, but you couldn't have everything you asked for. Could you?
It was 4 p.m. now, and you had successfully spent your day lazing about and binge watching a crappy sitcom on Netflix.
You missed your boyfriend. You really did, but you had to be strong because you knew you weren't the one in the wrong.
God, you were so pathetic. You hadn't even eaten all day because of a man, and it made you remember how mad he'd get if he realised that you were skipping meals and not taking care of yourself properly.
Life was so sickening without him (it had only been a day).
You decided you were going to make yourself a quick sandwich because you were already dying of heartbreak, and it'd be wrong to add hunger to your struggles.
6:30 p.m., you received a text from Chan saying he was coming over to pick up his stuff and added that you could throw them out if you wanted to.
He was so dramatic. You replied to him with a simple "fine" and turned off your phone.
You were just about to start making your sandwich when you heard a key turn in the lock.
He was here to pick up his stuff.
You were so happy to see him, but you had to keep your cool and act like you weren't because you didn't want to stroke his already inflated ego.
"Am I not going to get a hey or anything?" He said after he had come in and locked the door, but you completely ignored him and kept on eating your sandwich at the kitchen island.
"So you're ignoring me now, huh? You gon do me like that?" You still didn't pay any attention to him and kept munching on your sandwich.
You heard him scoff and watched him find his way into your once shared bedroom.
You shouldn't have looked up at him, though, because now you were horny. Did he really have to wear the grey sweatpants and compression shirt combo today? Of all days?
He was definitely doing this on purpose. He knew what he was doing, but no, you weren't going to give in.
He came out of the bedroom carrying his two suitcases and proceeded to the living area to pack up his console and the other things that accompany it.
You stood up from the chair you were eating on, and you were now leaning backwards with your elbows rested on the kitchen island.
You were watching his every move in silence.
You expected him to just finish packing his stuff and leave, but he stopped halfway, got up, and started walking towards you?
He came closer till there was only an inch of space between you two, and you had to crane your neck upwards to look at him.
"Baby, what are we even doing?" He said and your stomach did a thousand flips.
"I don't know you tell me." You were determined not to fold today.
"What do I have to do to make you come back to me." He sighed and placed his hands on your hips. Fuck.
You placed your hands on his and took them off your hips, and widened the gap between you two a bit.
"Come on." He said in an almost whiny tone.
"Beg me." You didn't even think before you spoke, but that was the smartest thing you had said in a while.
Your boyfriend looked at you unbelievably and scoffed at you like there was no way he was going to do it.
"You can just pack up and leave if you aren't going to do it." You were doing so good.
"Okay, fine, you win." There was no way he was actually agreeing to this.
"Y/n, I'm so sorry for being an insecure and immature boyfriend. I acted like a dick and I was in the wrong but it's been hell without my girl and I miss her so fucking much my heart hurts, my tummy hurts, my head hurts and I can't even think straight it feels like the walls are closing in on me and I'm going to stop breathing at any second..."
"Bro, okay, I accept. Stop being a drama queen." You said half laughing at your boyfriend.
"Does that mean I can kiss you now?" He asked.
"Say, please." Maybe you just wanted to hear him beg a tiny bit more.
"Please y/n can I kiss you, please?" He was surprisingly playing along well.
"Ye-"
You felt his lips on yours before you could even finish your sentence. Oh God, you missed this. You missed him.
You guys were kissing each other so hungrily with tongues gliding in and out of each other's mouths. You could feel his hard on against you and you wanted nothing more than for him to fuck you.
Chan bit your lower lip, and you felt him smile against your lips when you let out a moan. He was so damn cocky.
You started to undo the strings to his pants, but when he realised what you were doing, he broke the kiss and moved away from you.
You were slightly (very) confused as to why he did that, and you're pretty sure you whined as he broke contact between you two.
He looked at you up and down and bit his lip.
"When did you get this skirt? Is it new?"
You looked down at what you were wearing and it was even too short to be called a skirt but you were at home so who cares?
"It's not new. I've had it for years, but I stopped wearing it because it got too short." Why were you guys talking about clothes when he could be breaking your back right now?
"I want to be rough with you." Oh, you were so back.
"Then be rough with me." You replied, looking straight into his eyes.
"Fuck." Chan said. Before you could even say anything else, you were being hoisted up onto the kitchen island, and chan went back to devouring your lips.
He went down to your neck with a hunger, and your hands went into his hair. He was definitely leaving marks on your skin.
You were moaning his name uncontrollably, and you guys hadn't even gotten started yet. Maybe absence does really make the heart grow fonder.
He stopped kissing you once again, but this time, he was giving instructions.
"Get down and take off your clothes." You got down immediately and started to comply, but he stopped you when you got to the skirt.
"No, not that. I want to fuck you in it." You died a little at that statement.
"Take off your panties." He said.
"I'm not wearing any." You're a 100% sure you saw his eyes darken at that statement.
"Okay, turn around and rest on the island." You complied without saying a word.
Your cheeks were met with the cold marble and you could feel your ass and pussy completely exposed to him.
You felt chan come closer to you, and you let out a moan when he started to rub his dick in between your folds teasing your entrance.
You thought he was finally going to fill you with his dick but instead, you were met with a hard slap on your ass and you let out the nastiest moan ever.
One slap turned into two, three turned into four, and your cheeks were stained with tears.
Chan gave you no time to collect yourself as he pushed himself inside you and thrusted agonisingly slowly to gain a rhythm.
You started whining from how slow he was going and as if he knew he started pounding into you as fast as he could.
He filled you so well it was like you were two pieces of a puzzle.
He was fucking you so well you were loosing your mind and your stamina.
Chan noticed and used one hand to steady you then continued his assault on your pussy.
You started feeling that familiar feeling in your stomach and you knew you were about to cum.
"Chan, please don't stop." You begged.
He, in fact, did not stop, but just as you were about to reach your high, he pulled out and left you an unsatisfied mess.
"Did you really think it was going to be that easy?" He asked you in the most condescending tone ever.
"You liked it when I acted all weak and nice, huh? Well, it's your turn now." Fuck. You should have known there was a catch.
He smacked your ass once again and your pussy clenched around nothing.
"Not so confident now, are you?" He taunted.
"Chan I'm sorry please just fuck me please." You begged hoping to make things better for yourself.
"What do you want?" He asked you.
"I want to cum chan please make me cum." You whined.
"You'll have to earn it because only good girls get to cum." He said that and went back to destroying your insides.
This man edged you not once but three times.
At this point, you were sobbing uncontrollably, and you were worn out.
"Who does this pussy belong to?" He asked while thrusting in and out of you at the speed of light.
"You Chan." You said through tears.
"Who do you belong to?" He asked.
"You chan." You struggled to get that last one out.
"That's my good girl." He said and finally let you cum. Your release hit you like a brick, and he came right after you, too. You felt so full that you were literally on cloud 9.
Chan lifted you from the island immediately after, turned you to face him, and gave you a kiss on your forehead.
"You know I love you, right?" He asked, and you nodded.
"Let's not fight anymore, okay?
"Okay." You answered, and he pulled you in for a hug.
You were so back!
You did lie about one thing, though. The makeup sex was too good for you guys to stop fighting.
