m

it feels easy to be vulnerable here

[thegirllnside]

you could have my heart 🖤 @tiredandlonelymuse

edits by me 🖤

[thegirllnside]

books & boobs: iichliwp edition 🫶🏼

@tiredandlonelymuse

[thegirllnside]

I love lamp 🫶🏼

@tiredandlonelymuse

[thegirllnside]

ON ALL FOURS! 🦮🐾

safeword by @tiredandlonelymuse

[thegirllnside]

[thegirllnside]

5 years ago today, my life changed. I've always loved you and your music but this one really hit differently.

5 years ago today, I met Ashley. Effervescent light and colourful rainbow light leaks entered my very mundane and grey world. They swept me off my tired feet and filled the parts of me I thought I had lost forever. With every song and every word, I could feel my own emotions, my pain and my thoughts, bursting through the speakers, as if I had somehow written this masterpiece myself... this was when I truly realized that I wasn't alone in the way I felt.

there will never be enough words in the English language that will correctly express my gratitude towards you, Ashley, for being so brave and vulnerable, because without this work of art I would have never seen the light.

Thank you Ashley, for painting my world with colour again. 🌈🤍

@tiredandlonelymuse

[tiredandlonelymuse]

Aging is cruel.

Pages of a book stuck between fingers.

You lick and lick and they stay attached

refusing to peel apart.

Hair like dryer lint, lifting in the wind

whisping away, fragile thing.

A ghost of years past

and on your face, the betrayal of truth.

Hubris washed off, and confidence broken.

Heart in shambles, the failures of relationships end.

Jobs lost and children angry.

Revealing the lonely ranks of insecurity.

I know nothing.

I am nothing.

I never was.

You are nothing too

but you posture, with your youth.

And maybe, that is good enough

while it lasts.

- Senescence. 2025

[tiredandlonelymuse]

Original tumblr girl you wouldn’t understand

[thegirllnside]

Hell ya 🤘🏼

[tiredandlonelymuse]

The early nights are confusing for the soul, but the forced retirement might do me some good. We went to a dance party. We were the youngest ones there and it was beautiful watching people a decade older than me find joy in nostalgia. I loved Anora. I miss New Jersey. I have been making Christmas ornaments by hand for my future family. I have been taking care of my mother. She has good days and bad. All of this in the few moments between the work and the work and the work. Confetti shot out of a Canon once the crowd already left the building. I feel as though it was all for nothing. It’s a dry, cold, itch. Maybe I’ll hide again until a tour when the sun comes back. Maybe I won’t make a sound. Maybe I’ll sleep. Maybe I’ll choose different this time with my restart to zero, my bonus life I pulled from a box. And pull from a box with a needle every 3 weeks. Maybe maybe maybe. Maybe I fixed everything so I could do this one thing again, without realizing that one thing was what needed fixing. I am tired and I forgot how to have fun. I complain too much and I should keep it to myself, I’ve been told a lot the past few weeks. But the thing is that I can’t. I have an unrelenting ache and a never ending whine that must crank out of me like a tornado siren in the dark. That’s what’s been wrong with me the entire time, couldn’t they see? I’ve always needed to be seen to exist. But now they don’t see me, and I’m still existing. Perhaps, problem solved. Regrettably.

[thegirllnside]

I promise, I see you h🫶🏼

[crossedmythoughtlessheart]

Ego - Halsey

[tiredandlonelymuse]

[thegirllnside]

˙⋆✮ LONELY IS THE MUSE ✮⋆˙

my favourite part🩶

@tiredandlonelymuse

[tiredandlonelymuse]

This is how I originally wrote it. One of those that starts as a poem and then begs to be a song. I posted a fragment of this on tumblr a while back, but here’s the initial piece in its entirety 🤍

[tiredandlonelymuse]

I have been Halsey for so long. For most of this time, I never stopped to think about what I actually wanted. I just fulfilled the prophecy I thought was laid out for me. When I was 19 years old I woke up every day to a new article proclaiming me some sort of future monolith. I wanted to prove them right. I sat in that doctor’s office and filled my body with poison. I watched my face collapse and my hair disintegrate and my bones screamed into the void for help. It was then I realized, if I were ever to do it again, I would do it for me. I don’t want the prophecy. I just want to make stuff. Forever.

[tiredandlonelymuse]

My own fans are hands down meaner to me than any other people on the planet. Not speaking for all of you, of course. But it used to be just a minority that were awful to me and now it seems like a majority have only stuck around to chime in occasionally with their opinion of how much they hate me or how awful I am. it’s hard to want to engage in a space that is completely devoid of any kindness, sympathy, patience; or to be honest human decency. Especially after years of hiding from the interactions for fear that this EXACT thing would happen. I don’t know man. I almost lost my life. I am not gonna do anything that doesn’t make me happy anymore. I can’t spiritually afford it.

When I got sick all I could think about was getting better so I could come back and be a part of THIS again, but I don’t even know what *this* is anymore and I want to crawl in a hole and I regret coming back.

[tiredandlonelymuse]

by Sarah Pardini

[thegirllnside]

🤎

[thegirllnside]

🖤⚔️🏰👸🏻 @tiredandlonelymuse