Your action hero just got shot in the shoulder, stitched it up in a motel bathroom, and is now running through a forest. I need you to know that a shoulder wound severs muscle, nerves, and sometimes bone, and the human body's response to that is not "mild wincing followed by full range of motion." here is what injuries actually do to peoplee...
⊹ Adrenaline is REAL and it does allow people to do extraordinary things immediately after injury, BUT it is a loan, not a gift. you borrow the function and you pay it back later with interest. Your character might genuinely be able to run for twenty minutes after being stabbed. and then the adrenaline drops and everything the body was delaying arrives all at once. the collapse is NOT weakness. it's biology collecting its debt. write the debt collection. it's more interesting than the heroic sprint anyway.
⊹ Blood loss changes cognition before it drops you. you don't go from "fine" to "unconscious." you go through a whole middle stage of confusion, poor decision-making, emotional dysregulation, a strange calm, tunnel vision, difficulty forming sentences. Your injured character making a bad call, saying something they normally wouldn't, becoming suddenly and inexplicably gentle--that's blood loss. use the middle stage. it's dramatically rich and almost nobody writes it.
⊹ Recovery has a timeline and the timeline is long and boring and inconvenient to plot. a broken rib takes six weeks and during those six weeks sneezing is a genuine emergency. a concussion means no screens, no reading, no bright lights, and symptoms can persist for months. a stab wound to the abdomen means weeks of infection risk, limited mobility, and a specific kind of exhaustion that has nothing to do with sleep. Your character being sidelined and frustrated and useless for a long time is not a narrative problem. it's the story.
⊹ Pain also affects personality in ways writers skip. chronic pain makes people short-tempered and then guilty about being short-tempered. it makes concentration difficult. it makes intimacy complicated, both emotional and physical. a character who was patient and warm before their injury and is now snappy and withdrawn is not a character regression. they're in pain. pain is exhausting in ways that don't show on the outside. the people around them noticing and not knowing how to help is a whole story in itself.
No Bleach commentary just yet today, sorry--we're running understaffed at work and I'm doing what I can to help. But I did have a dumb thought:
What would happen if the lieutenants were given rolling chairs for their offices? Because let's be honest, absolutely none of these people are normal and at least one will find a way to cause chaos with it.
I’m always reading your writing updates because they help me not to feel alone in my own writing struggles, a lot of things you say resonate deeply with me and inspire me to go on. I was wondering if it’s too much to ask you to share your outline example from the past and explain how you typically work on it? I will also understand if it’s too personal! Thank you
Aw, I'm glad that you find them helpful! Writing can be a very lonesome activity, because you have to go off and actually do all the writing before you can share it. When you're struggling, it feels even worse. I love reading other people's writing updates, because it's sort of like parallel play, like we're all doing this thing together.
I wrote a post once on writing long stories that covers my outlining process in pretty nauseating detail, but I am happy to provide a concrete example as well. That post is a few years old, and I will say that I have come around more on outlining. I didn't used to like it, but it's just a really essential tool for me these days.
People use outlines in different ways, and for me, what they are really good for is being able to zoom out on your story--to be able to see it as a whole, to see its structure and flow. I used to be a software engineer, and I approach my writing much the way I wrote code. For software, especially the more complicated it gets, you would always want some sort of flowchart or maybe something written out in pseudocode, and that's the way I use my outlines.
Every time I write a fic, I outline it differently. I was looking through a few old ones, trying to figure out what would make a good example, and I had all sorts of annotations and color and format coding. I don't even remember what a lot of it meant at this point, but I know it was crucial to me when I was deep in the sauce of writing. My outlines are living documents; the process of making and updating them is as important as the information they actually contain. A lot of times when I get stuck, I make a different sort of outline--one based on emotional arcs instead of plot points, or one based on a calendar. Sometimes I break subplots out into their own mini-outline. The worst I was ever stuck on a fanfic was when I was writing go places and I had all these unrelated scenes and no idea how to fit them together and I made a color-coded spreadsheet about it. Anyway, to me, outlining is just thinking on paper and about remixing things in different ways, and it is part of the process of figuring out how my story is going to go.
For my example, I decided to use my outline for my Tattoo Artist AU story, this could be permanent, you know. This was a very straightforward case, maybe a bit too straightforward, but it was reasonably sized and easy enough to see what's going on. Most of my "outline documents" are really quite long and they look like the back of a needlepoint project. Hopefully this is helpful, and please feel free to ask questions!
the rest is under the cut, because this is long, and also spoilers for anyone who hasn't read the story
So, a little background on this could be permanent is that I had written two chapters as little one-shot stories that I do for request events, and I decided that I wanted to spin it out into a full fanfic. Those two chapters already existed and were somewhat set in stone. Before I started writing, I sat down and outlined what my ideas for where I thought this could go. Here's what it looked like:
You can see that some parts have a lot of notes and many parts are very vague. I think it's pretty typical that when you start a fanfic, you have a few scenes that are really clear in your head, and I wanted to capture those details so I didn't forget them later. On the other hand, I like to let my stories evolve as I write them, so I was okay with some of those other bullets being mostly vibes. You will notice that it has an end. I do not start writing until I have an end condition. That's a rule for me.
So, I started writing, and I started what I call an "as-built" outline. A lot of times, I just add this information to the original outline, but for whatever reason, for this one, I made a second one. I wrote this fanfic in an extremely linear way, which is a bit of a rarity for me. But basically, as I finished a chapter, I would add a little summary of it to the as-built, along with word count.
If I am writing out of order (and I may have done that for a few chapters of this; I honestly don't remember at this point), I can stick a bullet point in for parts I skipped, maybe in italics to indicate what I haven't done yet. Any time I reference something that I have haven't written yet, like a character telling another something, I make sure to note in the outline that I need to put it in there. Mostly, this is so I don't forget, but it's also the case that if I skipped a chapter, it's because I didn't have a good idea for it, and as that "to do" list builds up, it gives me ideas for what that chapter should look like--I should do a scene at the character's work, or have them go shopping, or bring in some fun side character we haven't seen in a while, etc.
Anyway, here's the final version of the as-built. In this case, the text is not always that descriptive and sometimes even kind of in shorthand, because it's just to remind me what I've already written. Sometimes I like to put pithy things in my outline because they make me laugh. I know it is better and more useful to write actual details but I do not get paid for this so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
The difference between these two is that the first one is event-based, and this is story structure-based. Because I've put the word-counts there, it allows me to see how much of the story is spent on different things. I didn't do it here, but I often employ a rotating narrator POV, and I usually note who is the narrator for each chapter. If I haven't gotten there yet, I may include the options for chapter narrator.
This is one of those stories that has an actual timeline--Byakuya's birthday comes up at one point, and I wanted the climax chapter to occur on Valentine's Day. I don't think most readers actually care how accurate you are about these things, but it helps me, so I also made a time-based outline. I make these often and this is on the smaller side:
I also fleshed out the original outline as I went along. Here it is, with changes highlighted since the original:
In this case, I really didn't add too much, but I did add in some dates and fleshed out some of the later plot points. The strike-throughs are for sections I had finished, because I like crossing things off. For most of my stories, these things end up getting written as I go, rearranged, all sorts of notes and To Do's added, etc. The less I know where I'm going when I start, the messier the process of figuring that out looks like.
Like I said, I hope this is the sort of thing you were looking for, and I hope it was helpful! Good luck with your writing!
This site has never lacked for Renji eyebrow discourse, but today I want to talk about the Kuchiki Ancestral Tiny Eyebrows, and whether they thread them from a young age or if it's some sort of genetic condition.
The reason I am posting this is because I was writing some fanfiction about Ginrei (don't judge me). It's always fun to write facial expressions for people with mustaches, and I wanted him to have some similarly shaggy eyebrows to match. My commitment to accuracy trumps all, so I had to run over to the Bleach wiki and look at this shit?:
mustache so luxurious, why eyebrows so tiny?
I already knew that Byakuya has had his tiny eyebrows since Turn Back the Pendulum, because I've checked before. It doesn't really mean anything, he was definitely old enough to be doing beauty treatments at the time. Anyway, here he is anyway, if it pleases the court:
I feel fairly safe in saying that Rukia's tiny eyebrows are natural, since she had them in Inuzuri and plucking her brows really, really does not seem like a thing that would concern her at that time. Now that I think about it, this is probably what Renji meant by "natural elegance."
Really opens two intriguing-yet-opposite scenarios:
Kuchiki Brow-threading 'Verse: Byakuya meets Hisana and is smitten specifically because she has the delicate brows his family his attempted for generations to sculpt
Kuchiki Natural Tiny Eyebrow 'Verse: Part of the family objection to Hisana was that she was making the eyebrow curse worse, how could you, Byakuya?
For the record, Hisana's brows are more substantial than Rukia's, but they're not exactly generous.
I'll be honest, this post started out with me wanting to make a joke about how there wasn't much objection to Renji marrying into the family because he supplied critically needed eyebrow genes. I had already looked up the picture of Ichika from the epilogue and confirmed her normal eyebrows. But then on a whim, it occurred to me to check the Hell chapter too and friends, they got smaller.
I know how eyebrows work and they only get bigger as you get older without specific intervention.
Mystery solved: Kuchiki brows are that way on purpose. Beauty ain't easy friends.
Also, for the record, Captain Rukia's brows from the same chapter are absolutely miniscule. Good job out-Kuchiki-ing the Kuchiki girl, live your dreams. (I credit Renji's tweezing skills)
also worth noting that a lot of people talk themselves out of OCD treatment because the risks you fear can be on some levels 'real.'
it's very normal for people with OCD and chronic illnesses to develop Health and Somatic OCD. if you are someone who has seizures, it is a very real part of your life that you need to be aware of early warning signs that a seizure is coming on. you also need to consider whether you'll be safe and have access to resources wherever you go. i.e. if you have a seizure at the mall, what is your plan? who can/will help?
someone with OCD who has seizures might find themselves endlessly 'checking' their body for signs of an oncoming seizure as a compulsion. checking is emphasized there, because it's a common type of OCD compulsion. the OCD checking goes far beyond reasonable or helpful self-awareness. OCD anxiety is so powerful, the person might even begin to imagine and feel physical warning signs of a seizure that are not 'real,' in that they are not actually about to experience a seizure.
the person might also obsess over every way having a seizure in public might go 'wrong.' yes, there is a well-respected hospital nearby, but what if the ambulance gets caught in traffic? yes, they have a seizure-alert dog, but what if in the very moment the dog should detect and alert, a passerby distracts the dog. what if, although their friends are usually understanding, this is the seizure event that happens at the worst possible time, like during a movie climax, and everyone finally gets fed up and never wants to hang out anymore?
the compulsion then is avoidance. it's not unusual for people with OCD and chronic illnesses to stop leaving the house entirely.
the issue: all of these things not only could genuinely happen to someone who has seizures, but they might be things that have happened to the person with seizures and OCD, thus heightening the reality of the intrusive thoughts.
then it's common to believe that an OCD therapist prescribing exposure therapy simply doesn't understand your other disabilities, how real they are and how in danger you actually are. if they understood, they wouldn't prescribe you an exposure that could put you at risk...
it's no coincidence that OCD latches onto fears based in some realities of our lives. i don't have religious OCD because i'm not religious. why would i be afraid of offending a god or religious authority whose opinion means nothing to me?
whereas the fear of having a fatal asthma attack while i'm out hiking is reasonable. it happens to other people. it might one day happen to me. my OCD can look like taking deep breaths to 'check' for a wheeze. it doesn't matter that i did that 3 minutes ago. i need to do it again! and again. maybe i'll ask my other friend with asthma if it sounds like i'm wheezing. in ten minutes, maybe i'll ask her again. maybe i'll actually begin to feel like i am wheezing. that my chest is tight. that i can't take a deep breath.
this is just one reason why Reassurance as an OCD compulsion does not work. not only does the person with OCD need to be reassured continually, forever, because the relief of reassurance wears off. But not all OCD fears can be reassured. No one can tell me "you will not have an asthma attack when you're out " or "if you have one, everything will go perfectly and you'll be okay."
that's simply impossible to know.
that's why OCD is treated by being exposed to and accepting the anxiety. you don't overcome OCD by learning to believe nothing bad can happen. it's about knowing that something terrible might happen, and living in relative peace despite that, free of rituals & compulsions. being able to stop and check your body appropriately when necessary and make plans respecting your real needs, without losing your life to compulsions and fear.
btw this also shows up in me and some of my chronic illness+OCD friends as responsibility & guilt obsessions.
“If I go out knowing it’s risky for me, if I do end up sick/burnt out/injured/fatigued then it’s my fault. I’ll be stupid for having done so and no one will care that I’m suffering because it’ll be my fault, and I wouldn’t deserve their compassion anyway.”
Ofc people with chronic illness & disability can experience these feelings without OCD. This is just OCD-specific for me; OCD tries to convince me to deny myself the dignity of risk.
The answer for me is, of course, going out anyway. And it gets easier when I do.
Unique footage! This pack of 11 wolves appeared in front of a wildlife camera in the Southwest Veluwe in the Netherlands last week. These recordings are made with fixed cameras that are triggered by movement.
Throwback to this clip from Ep 337’s Shinigami Zukan /Illustrated Picture Book, where Toshiro recalls seeing Byakuya head off somewhere every night, before the sound of wood being chopped could be heard. He believed that Byakuya was training after healing....only that that's not the case 😉
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