hthrloooo replied to your post: “because of the nature (of the beast) and the unique cross-section that…”:
I’ve been thinking about this stuff, too, especially lately. It seems harder for me to let it go when it happens (which I’m working on).
i understand totally… it’s nice when it no longer matters. when it doesn’t have to mean anything – not anything important about you or even so much about the person who unfollowed
there was a time when i needed to cope with being at odds by either trying to fix myself or by judging the other person wrong/off somehow
more and more, as i heal… i don’t really feel so much (anger/hurt) like people who don’t like me are bad or wrong or need adjusting, nor do i feel i need adjusting so much, nor do i have a need to declare those people “losers” or otherwise… less.
instead i feel really comfortable just deciding who i do and don’t want to surround myself with and leaving it at that. accepting that there are valid positions that i just don’t want to be involved with or that i’m not at all interested in and being fine with the possibility that those are good poisitions even so - just not my thing - that feels really free. also - honest.
because the same way no else really knows all about me, i can’t really know what is motivating anyone else. so it’s not for me to say if someone is absolutely good/bad/indifferent - it is only for me to decide what and who i want to be close with. it becomes a matter of – who I want close and involved in my practice*
it’s also a matter of how i want to spend my time… to i want to spend it all analytically, always comparing what i think is happening with what i think should happen? or do i want to fully sink into the experience and be curious about all the sensations and feels it brings.
it is a lot. and it is good to think about. AND most fascinating of all is how caught up it all is with the practice of judging ourselves :}
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