The Homegrown Mama

This blog is the journey of Kathi of The Babylove Company;  a mother, wife, natural birth doula, homesteader, and naturalist. Follow me as I stumble through this journey called life.  Some things you will find here are from others that I find that I enjoy and whose philosophies are aligned with my own, and some are of my...

[themidwifeisin]

Is it okay to get an epidural

Of course!!

As a midwife I fight tooth and nail to support my birthing patients in having EXACTLY THE BIRTH THAT THEY WANT no matter what that is.  That may mean helping my patients to have an unmedicated birth where they catch their own  baby in a kneeling squat, or that may mean advocating for the anesthesiologist to come back from their break to give my patient an epidural when they decide they’re ready for one.

There are risks to using an epidural, sure, just like there are risks to any procedure we do.  The main risks are the following:

1 in 100 people have a headache afterward that is treatable and usually goes away within a week

Occasionally the birther’s blood pressure will drop after the epidural is placed, affecting the baby’s blood pressure and therefore heart rate, causing more interventions like more IV hydration, oxygen mask, different positions in bed.

Very very small risk of infection, injury, or bleeding

Possibility that contractions will slow down (this is not research based but related to my professional experience and the timing of when the epidural is placed

Increased risk for having an OP (upwards facing) baby, which makes dilation and pushing slower and often harder.

Once you have an epidural you’re unable to leave the bed for anything including the bathroom, so a catheter is placed in your bladder to drain urine.  You can change positions in bed short of actually getting out of the bed.

But here’s the thing - for people who for ANY number of reasons don’t want to or can’t tolerate the contractions, SUFFERING is a SIGNIFICANT risk of NOT having an epidural.  THere’s a difference between coping with contraction pain and just plain SUFFERING.  I never want my patients to suffer.  

Sometimes an epidural can be just want someone needs, too.  I have had many patients too anxious to relax and let their cervix dilate and the muscles allow the baby to descend.  For them I might suggest an epidural which allows those muscles to relax, they can get some sleep (birth is EXHAUSTING) and then we turn down the epidural so they’re ready to push their baby out!

[theslaybymic]

it’s no one’s business how much or how little makeup you wear. Keslie Swygart’s post was met with such a warm reception has led her to a new social media initiative.

follow @this-is-life-actually

[doulacollective]

As we all know. Ina May Gaskin is a genius.

[arjuna-vallabha]

Muuuuuuu

[theperfectworldwelcome]

Beautiful !!! \O/

[madnatphotographs]

Bees are Important. March 2016- Natalie King

[doulacollective]

There’s Power In Looking Silly And Not Caring That You Do.

by Kendra

This week’s intention: Act Silly.

Truer words have never been spoken. Acting silly, being silly – very hard things to do if you are shy, self conscious or a little nervous to put yourself out there – BUT – if you do, the rewards can be great.

I find being around babies and children really seems reduce people’s inhibitions and you find those you think are more conservative making funny noises, dressing up, making faces, dancing around, just being silly and having fun to make the child laugh. It’s a great moment to watch.

Its hard not to take ourselves seriously these days and to find a moment for smiles, laughter and play can increase your endorphins which in turn relieves stress and helps alleviate depression and anxiety. Laughing is a great way to keep the doctor away!

This week as you set your intention, let it be one of lightness. Let the moments of joy and happiness whisk you away into the land of silly. Play. Sing. Dance. Giggle. Find silliness in the day with those you love. I promise, you will be rewarded.

[thehomegrownmama]

Check out our various birth services we offer including HypnoBirthing education and birth doula packages.

A new HypnoBirthing class is coming up! Come sign up today!

[thehomegrownmama]

Who Says Birth Has to Hurt?

We’ve all seen the shows with women screaming in labor pains.  You probably have friends who didn’t have a great time giving birth, and maybe your own mum has shared your birth story with you, pain included.  We assume that when we give birth that it’s going to hurt; our doctors and midwives even prepare us for it.  But does it really have to?

More and more women are learning that it truly doesn’t have to.  An increasing number of clinics and professionals are teaching mothers-to-be two important things: 1) To trust in herself and in her own power and, 2) The techniques she can learn and subsequently call upon during birth to make it a non-painful, and even joyful and comfortable experience.

As a side effect of the technological age, we are able to share our stories of births that involve a minimal amount of pain and discomfort, if any at all. We’re able to connect with each other and receive support through our own innate sense of how to give birth which can be the faster, easier, and more ecstatic experience that was experienced for many generations before the male-dominated advent of hospitalization and delivery by doctors.

Our bodies are perfectly designed to handle the birthing process. We are not broken.  In fact, there are ways to learn to give birth that facilitate orgasms and waves of ecstasy between contractions, which are then felt only as pressure.  The agonized screams are replaced by smiles and joyous laughter and it brings to mind a dance of excitement and anticipation, almost like a ceremony.

As a mother, you have this option.  Your birth story is yours to create, and you can choose to make it an intensely pleasurable experience for yourself and your baby.  Letting your baby be born into a state of such glowing, blissful love can be an amazing start to their life. We can help to teach you these techniques, or guide you to resources that can further your knowledge. Gathering information is one of the best things you can do for yourself and your baby.

[thehomegrownmama]

Birth as a Sacred Rite of Passage

Birthing new life transforms a girl, a woman, into a mother. There is nothing else in the universe that can create the kind of existential, life altering shift of perspective as when a woman takes part in the creation, growth, and subsequent birth of a baby into the world.

Our culture lacks the rites of passage that previous generations endured.  A rite of passage isn’t just a ceremony, though those have their place.  Instead, it’s a growth process initiated out of struggle, where you come through an event which will change your life forever. You’re left with a sense of achievement, but more than that, you have gone through an experience that has made you more, made you stronger than you were when you began.

Through the birthing of a child, a woman learns the true depth of her strength and power.  Once she discovers who she truly is in this way, there is no force on Earth which can take that away from her.  Birth solidifies a woman’s confidence, and can anchor her indomitable spirit.  A mother who has birthed a child cannot be crushed. She knows her capabilities beyond the doubt she may have had in the past.

Fear is replaced by a profound love.   She knows what her body and her mind can handle.  It isn’t a gentle ride, though it culminates in a joyous celebration.  It’s the beginning of a new life!

Many women have taken the opportunity towards the end of their pregnancy to plan a sacred setting, often a room in her home, where she can be inspired by the sights and sounds that she wants to include in her delivery. There may be pain, but there can also be orgasmic ecstasy, and either or both are perfectly acceptable and valid. She has the right to choose who is present with her, or the right to choose to be alone.

When the drumbeats of your contractions fade and you’re holding your little one, the rest of the universe disappears.  There are only the two of you.  The world is now a vastly different place, and you are so much more than you were only a few short months ago.

[thehomegrownmama]

The Medicalization of Birth

Since the dawn of time, women have been giving birth.  They have been giving birth in the fields, in huts, alone or surrounded by loved ones and handling birth as they should be handled; as a natural, normal function of the female’s body.  So why do we treat them like medical emergencies?

Today in this country, mothers, especially new mothers who don’t have family or friends to support them in a natural birthing plan, run the risk of being shuffled through the medical system as they prepare to have a baby. It is as much like it sounds, a system, much like a conveyor belt where the doctors and hospital’s policies take precedence if not questioned.  There is little honor or respect given to mothers, and there is no celebration of the new life which has entered the world.  From the warm darkness of his momma’s womb to the cold, bright, loud delivery room in a hospital, it can be a harsh environment for baby to be born into. The effect on the momma can be no less harsh for them either. Psychological wounds resulting in depression can result, as can an unsatisfying birth experience which she will always remember.  In some cases, women are so disrespected and their choices removed that it has been compared to rape.

I don’t say these things lightly, and I’m not saying them to scare you. My goal is to remind you that you have choices.

In our society, we are taught from a very young age that we need to seek an outside authority for validation and for guidance.  Most of us weren’t raised in settings where critical thought was welcomed, and as children we were just taught to obey by parents, teachers, and other adults.  This fits us neatly into the mainstream medical industry, and this is the thought process we as women continue to work to overcome in ourselves in many areas of our lives.

Prenatal visits are scheduled at particular intervals, and there is poking, prodding, measuring, and testing at every turn.  It can be uncomfortable, and even invasive, but we have been conditioned to accept this as normal.  Especially in the case of new mothers where they don’t know what to expect, they look for reassurance and guidance from the medical establishment. Sadly, what they get is systematized treatments.

This all culminates at the time of the “expected” due date.  A baby is ready when he or she is ready. Sometimes a little early, sometimes a little late.  That sort of view doesn’t work in the schedules of hospitals, though.  No, a doctor needs to have this whole “birth” thing planned out, he has places to be, after all, and other patients that need his attention.  Pop that baby out when he says to!  This leads to what is known as the Cascade of Interventions.  These usually include Pitocin, rupturing of the membranes, and “pain management”.  While we can’t say these interventions are the cause of our high rate of birth by cesarean section, there is evidence which suggests a correlation between them. It all sounds reasonable at each turn, this little thing to help with that, and so on.  But it results in an experience that has nothing to do with the joy of motherhood and the magnitude of creating a baby.

It’s devastating to see how many mothers miss that golden hour, that hour right after birth, to have their little one placed against their skin to bond and to begin suckling.  Babies have their cords immediately cut, get washed, wrapped, and stuck in an incubator with monitors.  In the vast majority of cases, this post-birth separation is needless and can create a psychological gap between mother and baby.

We’ve come a long way from squatting in a hut with the village wise woman, and it may not be in the right direction.  There are rare cases where true complications exist, and it is for these that I am grateful that doctors and nurses have the skill to save the lives of mother and baby.  But it’s cruel to use these stories against women to manipulate them into birth experiences that degrade them and the process of giving birth.

[thehomegrownmama]

Ever dream of giving birth in relative comfort and ease? I have a new HypnoBirthing class starting in just over a week so click on the link to find out more or to sign up!

[eastbaydoula]

www.doulaseastbay.com

[thehomegrownmama]

I couldn’t have said it better myself!

[ratatouillefan42-deactivated201]

its transparent! :^)

[ducklingfantasy-deactivated2019]

@babygoatsandfriends

[thehomegrownmama]

Got your hands in deep doo-doo? Read on to figure out whether cloth or disposable diapers will keep your budget (if not your hands) cleaner.

Trying to decide between cloth or disposable diapers? This blog is a pretty good breakdown of pros and cons. It is also worthwhile to consider a laundering service which would take away the most undesireable parts of cloth, namely the soiled diapers and frequent laundry! While paying for a laundering & delivery service will decrease the savings of doing it yourself, it will definitely save you in time, electricity, water, and laundry soap, and did I mention time?

[thehomegrownmama]

After delivering over 1000 babies a Board-Certified Ob-Gyn, many of these babies with the use of Pitocin, I have heard concerns about this drug from hundreds of pregnant moms-to-be.

Finally, a step in the right direction!  Of course, this is not new news to doulas and midwives. It is to the MDs that this message is so important to be heard. For most, birth is not an illness that needs to be medically managed.

[micdotcom]

Uber driver refuses to pick up a woman in labor

A new report in Fortune describes a New York City couple’s nightmare dealings with Uber. According to David Lee, his wife was in labor, and the couple and their birthing coach needed to get to the hospital. When they summoned an Uber, the driver refused to take them on the trip they requested. Then the driver added insult to injury.

[stuffmomnevertoldyou]

Late kids, long life?

Attention, 30-something single ladies: If you’re tired of people dropping not-so-subtle hints about having kids while you still have the eggs and energy, you can (probably, politely) tell them to back off.

A Boston University School of Medicine study found that women who can still give birth naturally after age 33 have a higher chance of living to extreme old age than those who had their last child before age 30.