Chiqui & Mico: Everything on Purpose
MAKATI, PHILIPPINES. On a warm and humid evening in late January, I met with a couple at a café to chat about their love story. The cafe was peppered with strange clowns and figurines on ornate vintage shelves. Frilled drapery flowed throughout this eerie and antique space that had a warm, yet ethereal vibe. We sat down for an hour to talk about how they came to be engaged.
The couple is Chiqui Lacson and Mico Vergel, two fiercely strong and independent characters with disparate professional backgrounds and personalities. Mico, an MMA fighter with a formidable physique, and Chiqui, a slim figured DJ for a major hip-hop radio station. Only a few days later, she would be grilling me on air about everything from bad kissing to watching porn. But that night was all about Chiqui and Mico, honest and sincere.
Mico’s description of his life before meeting Chiqui is a picture that most twenty-something guys can relate to: hopping from girl to girl, the occasional crazy ex, partying. Marriage was but a nebulous cloud off in the distance. For Chiqui, the sentiment was the same:
“Before I would have boyfriends [where I couldn’t] honestly see myself marrying this guy and having kids with this guy. It’s true what the old people say…’you just know.’ And then I thought, maybe I’ve never met him.” - Chiqui
So how did these two come to meet and come to be engaged within just one year? When I was introduced to their story, it was described like this: Chiqui made a list of some 90+ criteria that she was looking for in a partner, and she found someone who met nearly 100% of these qualities. Here’s a few of the items off her list:
Compatible in bed (she assured me that it’s no accident this is first on the list)
A head turner, someone you’d notice
Gets along with friends, family, people that matter
Good listener
Not a chauvinistic guy
Sensitive, but not soft.
Comes from a good family
Physically Healthy (he does MMA, for crying out loud.)
"The first time I saw her I thought ‘she’s the type you don’t play around with.’ So I just made friends with her. [She’s] someone you don’t wanna mess up with" -- Mico
One of the biggest questions I get asked about The HUSH Project is “what did you learn from your travels?” For me, it was learning that “love” won’t come to you unless you as an individual consciously and intentionally decide for yourself that it is something you really want. Chiqui recalls a similar experience, or a “late quarter life crisis,” as she calls it.
"When I was 28, 29 years old, it was the end of my being religious...I started reading about other religions...and thinking about myself, diving deeper. I think I want something meaningful, something forever. And then I stumbled into theta, and that’s what fueled this whole thing." -- Chiqui
Writing down a list of loose requirements for a partner isn’t anything new, but the sentiment around it has always been a resounding impossibility. There have been plenty of couples I interviewed for HUSH that told me “there’s no such thing as your dream partner.” But for Chiqui, she was able to harness theta meditation technique to help attract her ideal spouse. “Theta” is a form of meditation that slows brain wave activity down to a dream like state.
While Mico had requirements of his own (albeit not written out as extensively as Chiqui), he also went through an intentional self-transformation:
"I went out to Subic...switched my phone off, [and] healed myself spiritually, physically. This took two months. It changed me, permanently. Before [Chiqui] I didn’t really care. But this time it’s different." -- Mico
The year they started dating, they spent New Year’s in Boracay(another beachy island locale in the Philippines) surrounded by family and friends. Just after midnight, Mico dropped to one knee, shaking and nervous, and popped the question. A verklempt Chiqui was jumping around and dancing, but literally speechless.
“And then I said...I’m serious!”
“I did a dance, isn’t that better?”
As we sat in this weirdly decorated cafe, families around us enjoying their dinners as the eyes of ageless figurines looked on from the trinket-filled shelves, I thought to myself: I’ve never seen a more committed couple. Everything they do is on purpose. There are no mistakes, here. If there was ever a way to start a marriage, this is it. Goal-setting at its finest.
"Never think- or even begin to dream about splitting up. Just know that you’re going to be together forever. The moment you think about - what if I wasn’t with this guy anymore? No. There’s none of that. It’s just you and him and that’s it." -- Chiqui
This was unlike any story I’ve ever heard, and I think it’s safe to say that Chiqui is in the top percentile of those who list criteria for their spouse and actually get it. While it makes for an incredible story, surely not everyone can be this lucky. Even despite getting exactly what she wanted, she still recalls a feeling of uncertainty when giving her take on a definition of love.
"Mico and I come from very different worlds. I’ve never dated outside of my own circle or “kind” (for lack of better terms). For some very weird reason, something about this guy made me give him a chance. So for me, love breaks boundaries." -- Chiqui [via Facebook]
We snapped a photo, and parted ways. Was I inspired? Sure, although I’ve yet to start my written list of criteria (maybe I’m not ready yet, but I should be due for that late-quarter-life-crisis any minute now).
