When taking a visit to Midtown:
(a collaborative effort between @s-s-southsideserpentine and @thebetterjonesboy, inspired by the style of @hgk477)
1. Take in the scenery. The lush trees and scenic views of the sunset are one of the only things the two block-radius has to offer.
2. Notice the layout. The six small houses tucked next to the train tracks, the eerily empty shopping center beckons you with its green-lit warnings. The fog looms in thick clouds over the ground, no matter the weather that day.
3. Don’t comment about how quiet it is there, they already know. For a neighborhood that parallels the train tracks, you sure never see the train passing through. Late at night when you hear a train whistle in the distance, ask yourself whether or not this is a fever dream.
4. Tell yourself that it isn’t; that you were hearing the next freight shipment from the Blossom Maple Farm. Make yourself believe it.
5. When you need to buy yourself groceries, take a visit to the Grocery Outlet. Don’t ask the locals why they call it the “grossout”. It’s better that you not know.
6. Before you enter into the tiled, timeless cavern that is the grossout, pull out your stopwatch. You’ll want to know how much time you really spent in there.
7. When you reach into the dairy fridge to grab yourself some milk, don’t question the hands that come from behind in order to slide you the last quart of 2%. They know more than you know…ask them questions.
8. If you find yourself needing to use the restroom, you might find that it’s in your best interest to reconsider. If you’re brave enough to venture into the depths of the great unwashed, knock on the door three times before you check the handle.
9. If it’s unlocked, it means they welcome you. Try your best to drown out the drip-dropping sounds of sourceless water that echoes throughout the grey-tiled restroom.
10. As you make your way up to Buddy at register one, mind the shadows. They follow you as you bob and weave between the produce section and the deli, but vanish the second you check over your shoulder.
11. When you hand the cashier your sweaty, crumpled-up dollar bills, don’t look him in the eye. He doesn’t like when people stare at his scar. Drop your change in the tip jar, whisper a thank-you to him.
12. He and all the other spirits appreciate it.
13. Upon exiting the grossout, pull out your stopwatch. Did you spend more time in there than you thought? Less? It’s quite funny, isn’t it? How time seems to escape you here. Nevertheless, we hope you enjoy your stay.
14. If you find your clothes in need of a wash, follow the dull glow down the block. It’ll lead you to “Stop n’ Wash”, the local laundromat.
15. It’s often hard to distinguish the tired churn of the machines and droning buzz from the static silence of the dreary town.
16. Keep an eye on the clock on the wall, locals murmur about how they swear it never moves. There’s a reason the unofficial slogan is “Stop n Wash, where time stops and your clothes might get washed.”
17. The locals sit as they wait, at most a quiet hum of conversation, often nothing but the whitenoise. During the day sometimes there’s a faint breeze of 90’s grunge drifting through the background. Old magazines, tattered books, earbuds and hoods, the blaring light of a cell phone against a face you swear you saw once in a town across the state.
18. That shadow in the corner lingers. Vaguely shaped of a person, you might look to a local in alarm. They won’t take notice of you, so you’ll look back. The shadow isn’t there any longer and the skin on the back of your neck will begin to crawl as the hair on your arms starts to stiffen.
19. The air will begin to feel thick, like you’re trying to breathe in molasses. As you begin to feel like you’re suffocating, not understanding how everyone is unphased, you’ll stand and try to leave.
20. If you can’t find the door, wait for the lights to flicker. The 3rd bulb in the first row will flicker twice before the 1st bulb in the 2nd row flickers once. The doors will be there, waiting. The exit sign searing your dilated pupils.
21. If you feel the gaze of a hundred pairs of eyes on your back as you leave, don’t panic. They’re just curious, harmless though unsettling. Don’t look back, Orpheus was warned and you ought to heed the advice he chose not to. Tales are told for a reason.
22. Don’t pause in the doorway, just go. Didn’t your mother always tell you it was bad luck? You really mustn’t question so much whilst your visit continues on.
23. If you’re lucky enough to have brought your car with you, the gas station is the best place to go for cigarettes and a cheap fill up.
24. When you get out of your car, roll up your windows. Lock your doors. Don’t make eye contact.
25. As you approach the dimly-lit convenience store that’s attached to the local Gas & Go, look down. The masses of old men that flock around it’s doors lick their chops as you approach.
26. If you ask any of the locals, they’ll sadly admit that said group of men rarely leave their sidewalk perch. It’s been the same group of men for years. Nothing seems to change.
27. Hair gets greyer, beards get longer, but their unsettling presence is constant. Keep to yourself and you’ll be safe.
28. Every time you step foot inside the small store, the man behind the counter will great you with a startled, “You alright?”, as if he himself cannot fathom another person setting foot inside.
29. Nod your head and smile. Fake it if you have to. Pay for your carton of cigarettes, tell him $20 on pump #2. Hand him your card and nod appreciatively when he passes you the receipt.
30. Look at his name tag. Some say the only thing that changes about the man behind the counter is the name sewn into his starched shirt.
31. Walk quickly back to your car. Sit in the driver’s seat as your tank fills up.
32. Don’t forget to lock your doors.
33. If you are unable to afford the luxury of your own car, don’t fret, public transportation is always an option. The red and blue lights of the bus stop are welcoming and unsettling all in one.
34. Sit on the cold metal bunch until you realize that the bus is never coming.
35. If you see the headlights crawling through the fog, you might want to rub your eyes. It came long before you arrived, and won’t come again until long after you leave.
36. Some of the locals joke about how they swear sometimes the destination bar on the front of the vehicle reads “nowhere”, but the emptiness behind their eyes will leave you with the haunting feeling they might not be joking as much as they’d like to think they are. Laugh along, humor them. They need it.
37. As you make your way back to whatever godforsaken place you’ve managed to find lodging for the night, don’t worry too much about the rustling coming from the brush. The locals tend to gather in the shadows, singing songs in mother tongues.
38. If you find yourself unable to fall asleep, do not worry.
39. Check the clock on the old wood bedside table. Through the thick layer of dust you can see the neon red numbers, 00:00. Don’t think too much about it.
40. Remember, time is fleeting here. If it exists, it’s certainly not linear.
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