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Gracey, Kindergarten as Academic Boot Camp

P. 446-460

Gracey talks about how when starting kindergarten, the kids have set rules to follow and obey. They learn how to do these things with routine and peer pressure. They are to do what they are told by a person of authority and this sticks with them throughout the next 12 years. In kindergarten, I was always shy, but I always wanted to be good and follow the rules. I had friends but I still felt like the oddball out of everyone. Fortunately, because I never moved schools I had the same friends from K-7th grade. I always did my best to follow the rules but I lacked at learning new things. It was hard for me to grasp and maybe this was because I had a lot of distractions at home. When I moved to a different school in 8th grade, it was one of the hardest time for me in school. I was more focused on wanting to be friends with people, but I was still shy. I don’t think I really learned how to be social until high school, and I still wasn’t comfortable until senior year. It was always a struggle for me. But I think I’m doing a lot better with being comfortable with myself now.

5/16

Required Blog/ Adapted assignment from Joyce Johnson

I don’t usually look at people and see whether they are weird or crazy. I think that everyone has their own way of expressing things and sometimes it may seem out of the ordinary to other people because they aren't used to it. I guess one of the things I usually find is that people drive crazy on the road. The other day I saw someone driving fast and cutting off cars. The norms they were violating were the law, they were driving past the speed limit and cutting cars off. I did know that there were these norms because this is what I had to learn before getting my license. There would be in the DMV. I don’t believe there is any specific social status for this because I see many people drive crazy, however, it was a female and she looked to be of Hispanic heritage. I suppose for this to be somewhat acceptable were if there was an emergency, like if she had a friend in the car who was about to give birth, but even then, the dangers of driving recklessly can cost the lives of people. I can definitely think of a situation where I would be doing the same thing and not think of myself as crazy or weird. I think for me and for many people, when someone threatens your life, you take it personally and that usually happens on the road when someone is driving recklessly. I understand that many people do this and including myself, so maybe if I am considerate of other people and if other people think the same way, it would help lessen the number of reckless drivers.

5/10

Hunt, Police Accounts of Normal Force

P. 470-480

Hunt mentions how male cops are respected more than women cops. One of her reasons is that a female could be physically and mentally weaker than men, which can then affect their overall performance, such as freezing and losing the criminal. But that’s not the case, the academy prepares everyone exactly the same, and if they were to make a mistake they should learn from. Even though the academy may prepare everyone the same way, they do not perform the same practices on the streets. Cops are told to avoid hitting a person in the head or neck because it could cause lethal damage. When cops feel that their life is being threatened, they will use excessive force and would not follow what is right. When feelings of fear come into play, everything is seen in a different perspective and this is not taught in the academy. Teaching officers how to control their emotions before having them go out on the streets may be one way to help the officers be more in control.

5/7

Rosenhan, On Being Sane in Insane Places

P. 322-354

This chapter really got me thinking about how reliable these psychiatrists are. Could there be another agenda in keeping the pseudopatients to gain more money? Maybe that is what is blinding the psychiatrists to look past the sane patients? It’s funny how the patients who really have mental illnesses are able to see that the pseudopatients are actually sane. I guess you can tell how sane a person is when you aren’t. Or when you’ve already accepted that you have a mental illness and learn what it is that is wrong with you, you can identify a person who is sane, and the fact that they have been living with other mentally ill people. It’s crazy how people can’t shake the label that others have placed on them. When everything is on paper it is definitely much harder to get rid of the stigma. I can see why my mother doesn’t want to accept that my brother has schizophrenia. I think what is worse is that she would rather accept his criminal act than place his sickness on him. I suppose these are my own opinions though. I guess it’s worse being mentally ill in the world than being a criminal.

5/4

Zimbardo, The Pathology of Imprisonment

P. 315-321

I think the problem with trying to help change prisons into a more rehabilitative place, is that they don’t want to. All of these factors, mostly concerning money gets in the way of trying to actually help people become civil citizens in our country. There is certainly a trend of how things work around the world. One of the similar things is prisons. Maybe it is because they don’t feel like these people deserve to have money spent on them since they have a criminal record. Society has also factored into this because if one has a criminal record, it is almost impossible to get a job or an education. They automatically place the label on you, and it is stuck with you. These correctional officers take their authoritative position too far. I’m afraid for my brother because he is currently in jail right now. He had also been placed in solitary confinement, but this is due to his mental state. However, they sent him to a state hospital and he was able to regain his rights to go back into the general area for prisoners because of the tests he was able to pass. Since he was able to pass for being competent enough to stand trial, when he was sent back to the county jail, he is no longer in solitary confinement. However, I remember visiting him when he was in solitary, he wasn’t in the right state of mind then and I think that solitary made it worse for him. But I understand why he had to be in there. I remember thinking about how bad it must have been because of stories I’ve heard about solitary. But I then I realized that he was okay. I think that those who end up being in solitary because of behavior problems in prison would have a much worse time. It’s sick that the guards are allowed to treat the prisoners with such brutality that they end up feeling like animals. I can only imagine a guard thinking that “since you want to act like an animal, I might as well treat you like one.” I don’t think I can really have a say on this topic though. If only I could really experience it on both ends. But I really doubt that I want to.

5/3

Henslin, Eating Your Friends is the Hardest

P. 277-286

First of all, good job at surviving for those who survived the plane crash. I can’t imagine how it would be for me to survive like that. I wonder if my survival instinct will jump in or if I will cower and let myself die. I somewhat think that I would try to survive though. When I try to think about myself in this situation, I thought of how I would not be able to eat my friends as well. Maybe my enemy, but not my friends. I think I would probably enjoy eating my enemy haha. I don’t know if that is something to laugh about but it was funny in my head. The rules that these people set to help each other survive really made a difference in their survivability. However, with those rules, people could select what they chose to eat as long as it is within the guidelines. I think because there were more than three people, it was easier for them to decide whether or not they would eat each other. If it had been fewer people, the decision would have been harder. It was a really interesting story. Maybe something to have a thought about just in case I get into that situation I suppose.

5/2

JBC, Drugs/Deviance

I consider myself being an awkwardly friendly person. Some might describe me as being a sweet, beautiful and smart young lady, but I don’t quite agree with that. For someone reason, I don’t respond back to complements, this could look rude on my part, but it’s just that whenever I do it just feels wrong and walk away. Maybe because I have such a low self-esteem, which makes it hard to believe that there’s anything good about me. I try not to tell little white lies but, I guess “sugarcoating” something is what that is. I’m usually straightforward about things to the people I know. But if I know how sensitive they are or if I don’t really know a person that well, I tend to sugarcoat what I’m saying and agree with them even if I don’t.

5/2

Required Blog/ JBC, Wedding Dreams

It has always been girls who dreamt of becoming married and having a beautiful wedding. I think that this is probably because of how much it is shown on TV or how the females in the family talk about how weddings are amazing and it is always focused on the brides. To be honest I think that the traditional wedding is a bit sexist. The father gives their daughters to another man is a big example of how that is. Although, I don’t think marriage is really an effective way to show love in the first place. The whole “I want to be with you forever” is kind of scary to me. I don’t think it’s that I have a commitment problem or anything but, I guess people need that symbolism to reassure them that their partner won’t get up and leave one day. Even though marriage isn’t really solving that problem anyway. To each their own I guess. I’m not even opposed to marrying myself. But the whole wedding thing isn’t something I would look forward to. I don’t like all eyes on me unless it is for something I’ve accomplished. I don’t think getting married is much of an accomplishment. A wedding is all just a show and don’t forget how expensive it is. If I were to make a commitment to someone, I would prefer to just sign the papers and celebrate our coming together with just ourselves. It doesn’t have to be this big fiasco.

4/30

In Class Required Blog

Compare and Contrast

When I was younger, I would always be playing outside and a lot of the kids around my neighborhood were boys. At least the friend I made. I remember my mom would be ashamed of me being so tomboyish. When I was about 5, she took me ice skating and she saw how well I did on the ice my first time. So she decided that she would put me in lessons, and after awhile I was skating in little showcases and competitions. My mom would put on my makeup and tell me that I needed to look pretty because I’m a girl. I always hated when she put on my makeup because she loved taking pictures. I’m not opposed to taking photos but she was overbearing with it.

4/25

Coontz, The American Family

P. 425-431

Sad but true, the divorce rates are up and marriages are declining. People don’t want to go through the paperwork of having to get a divorce when they get married. It’s more of a hassle to split up than come together. With how high the divorce rates are up right now. I can’t blame people for not getting married nowadays. I can see how when people don’t know each other well enough before they are married, they tend to get a divorce. I’ve realized that you don’t really know a person unless you have lived with them for quite some time. Maybe at least 2 years. My son’s dad and I have lived together for 6 years now. I can see all the flaws my partner has and he see’s all of mine. After 6 years now, we can really decide if we want to get married to each other or if we still need to figure things out and grow. I honestly don’t see marriage as a necessity to live my life happy. I know that some people see marriage as something they need to do in their life. A goal of some sort but, I suppose there is some type of lesson and some experience you can gain from it. Having fewer kids now is probably due to income. It is difficult to live and try to get ahead when having so many kids. I think that is the goal of a lot of Americans, to get ahead. I think that a reason why I’m not married yet is that I felt like I wasn’t ready to make that type of commitment, I still feel like I want to learn who I am more. I think that is also what other people my age are feeling as well. There are so many people I know who aren’t married yet, and some of the reasons are the same as mine. I don’t think that anyone should marry unless they get to know each other better and that includes living together. I’ve learned a lot about what I want for myself after living with my partner after 6 years already and I think that is something everyone who is thinking about marriage should do.

4/25

Required Blog/ JBC, Counting Beauty

The whole concepts of beauty and being sexy is socially constructed and it is advertised by the media as what is expected from women if women do not have these things they think they are lacking something. “Our ideas of physical attraction feel deeply personal and have powerful implications for our self-worth and relationship to our bodies. While people often say that beauty is in the “eye of the beholder”, I feel this on a powerful level because my view of beauty flourishes from people who have made a difference in our humanity. I think beauty comes from what people do in the world that makes a difference. One example of this is when women give birth. There is beauty in that even though the whole process is ugly. A woman’s body can make another fully functioning body with lungs, heart, brain, limbs, and etc. These things make up you and me and from there we can flourish. The idea that beauty is mostly physical aspects of a person can be thought of as superficial, but I’m not saying that it doesn’t count. There is beauty in many things besides physical characteristics. We just need to open our eyes and mind a little more.

4/24

Required Blog/ JBC, Toy Store Observation

I went to Target and visited the toy aisle. The background behind the sports cars, construction toys and action figures were blue or more of a darker color. The background behind the Barbies, kitchen toys, dolls, Disney princesses and dress-up clothes was pink or more of a brighter color. This is what the gender-based marketing was, The store has grouped toys that are traditionally for girls in the pink section and toys that are traditionally for boys in the blue section. If you are a girl who wants to buy a Star Wars Lego set, or superhero toy, you are made to feel as if you are crossing into the “boys section” to get your toy or vice versa. Target even have signed over the toy aisles that say “Girls” and “Boys,” but the end result is the same – retailers are assigning a gender to toys. The only toys that I have seen were gender neutral, were toys for babies.

4/22

Miller, Women in the Military

P. 518-534

I found this chapter to be completely absurd. This may be the reality of the situation, but just how unbelievable the men’s statements are is ridiculous. I was able to feel the offense they portrayed to the women. It is ridiculous how women have to put up with these antics from men who feel threatened because the females are showing more dominance in their own masculine field. This is where I truly see how mankind is the issue. How humankind is completely invalid in our society. Women get sexually harassed all the time, but I can see that the real issue is when men use gender harassment. Women are always being judged by men and they wonder why they are so “sensitive”. We have assholes out there who make it so difficult for females if they step out of their gender roles. I honestly have no faith in our humanity. I hope that I could live to see the day when women can lead. I would really like to see the outcome of that. I hope that they can make the world a better place than what man could do. But then again if I say that then it wouldn’t be equal. I don’t want to point fingers but it just seems that white and men are what the problem in this world is. The women in the military have to put up with so much, it’s as if the men think the women's purpose is to outshine them. I’m guessing they take it personally when a woman can do their job better than them. One of the things that really set me off in this chapter was the enlisted white man talking about how women take a pregnancy to their advantage. That women take advantage of the free medical. How ignorant can one be? This chapter had me so speechless from what the men are saying. I knew that some of these things already existed, but actually reading about some of the things these men are saying is absolutely appalling. I just hope the world can change, I want to see a better place for women, because man has pushed us down for so long.

4/21

Katz, The Importance of Being Beautiful

P. 341-348

I think that Dion’s study really shows how superficial our society is. I think that one thing which relates to this is the fact that heroes are beautiful and villains are ugly. But I had no idea that in schools, teachers would prefer to associate with children who have nice physical aspects than those who have a not so pretty look. Although, I can see how beautiful people are much easier going, whereas people with less good-looking characteristics are a little more critical. I can also see why in a career setting that the better-looking people are picked over the less attractive ones. Especially in a setting where they have to be face to face with customers. They need good-looking people because that is what helps bring in customers. What was really shocking to me was the looks of an elderly determines how they are treated in a nursing home. Now that I think about it, it could be true. Old people already lose their attractiveness, and some just look scary sometimes, but for those who look much softer in the face are seen as “cute” or “precious”. I could even see that those who are attractive are much happier than those who are unattractive. However, I think that people have their own definition of physical attractiveness. I’m not sure how people can stray away from being attracted to appearance. They say that the first impression is the most important meeting, and this includes the level of attractiveness while the other characteristics of a person. So, will bringing awareness of how we treat unattractive people really going to help prevent the discrimination of unattractive people?

4/21

Tannen, But What Do You Mean?

P. 192-198

I suppose that this chapter is true about the men and women in our society. From what I gained in the chapter is how women are much more sensitive in conversations than men. I guess that is true, but I also see sensitivity in men as well. Many become offended and try to defend their masculinity when they feel like they are being attacked or are pointed out about it. I do see a lot of females apologizing for no apparent reason. I think that I use to do that, and I feel like I probably still do. I know a friend who apologizes for feeling a certain way and I keep telling her to stop apologizing. It does tend to get annoying when I hear it all the time. Women do apologize more than they should and men don’t apologize enough. I also see that women are more sensitive than men when being criticized. I wonder if this has to do with because females are just more cautious with everything they do because that is how females are raised to be. Being cautious because appearance is “everything”. I think that it’s crazy how “thank yous” and apologies are rituals for women. Maybe it is a part of making women obedient. I really liked the jokes section of this chapter. I can see how comfort takes a part in this. When people are uncomfortable they tend to focus more on how uncomfortable they are than the jokes that are being told. I for one love jokes. It doesn’t matter how bad they get or how dirty they are. I like to hop on board and go with the act. I like making fun of myself or I guess putting myself down to make things a little more comforting to others and have a much lighter tone or vibe. I think when men and women fight there is a huge misunderstanding. Of course when anyone fight it is a misunderstanding. I suppose it is more of a miscommunication between men and women. But apparently, there is always miscommunication between men and women. I don’t think that will change anytime soon either.

4/20

Thorne & Luria, Sexuality and Gender

P. 180-191

In our everyday lives, we see the separation made amongst girls and boys. We see the separation of sexuality. I wouldn’t really say that these things go hand in hand, but I suppose there is a link. We often see the segregation among boys and girls from the time they are born. Girls are pink while boys are blue. Girls have friends that are girls when starting off in school and boys have friends that are boys. I remember in kindergarten when we use to say “boys have cooties” and well vice versa. Boys play rough and girls play nice. Nowadays though, I see a mixture of play between boys and girls. During recess, girls and boys have activities they play with each other and such. But I think if my mom saw me playing kickball or dodgeball on the playground, I would surely get the mean look. It’s ridiculous how girls can’t really have as much “fun” as boys. It seems like that sticks with us into adulthood as well. Men are more dominant than women are in anything in our society. They make more money and have less criticism if they stick to their masculine roles. How can we resolve these issues that women have? How can women become just as dominant? These are questions I wish I could find answers for.

When I was growing up I was taught that girl should like boys and boys should like girls. But, I felt something different. I think that the reason why I like boys is that they planted that in my head. But I always felt something different. I always felt more attracted to females. I didn’t know what it was at the time because I never knew there is more than one sexuality. I didn’t really understand because I was always afraid of it. Only because I had never seen it. When I was a senior in high school, I met a girl who changed me. She made me realize that I was way more attracted to girls than I thought I was. She was really the first girl I had feelings for and it was from having a conversation with her on facebook. We just made little comments and such and I didn’t even realize how much I liked her until I noticed how much I wanted to talk to her and really get to know her. My feelings for her were so much stronger than what feelings I ever had with any boy and that crushed me in the end. That was when I truly knew how emotional pain could affect a person. It was definitely a life-changing experience for me. I was then wanting to learn more about myself and is still continuing to do so.

4/19

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