Darling Kanaya

((I don't really have a specific point in canon that this is meant to take place during. I'll try not to completely shatter your suspension of belief, but please allow me some leeway!))

[therainbowdrinkingjadeblood]

I was tagged by the wonderful caedeschild (Go give them some love!)

Bold all that apply (italicize is so-so):

My muse knows how to: bake a cake from scratch | ride a horse | drive stick | speak/read a second language | dance| catch a fish |play an instrument | throw a punch | build a deck | ice skate | unclog a drain | program a computer | change a flat tire | fire a gun | sew  | juggle | play poker | paint | fly a kite | sculpt | write poetry | change a diaper | sing (not professionally) | shoot a bow and arrow | ride a bike | swim | sail a boat | do a back flip | play chess | give CPR | pitch a tent | flirt | stitch a wound | read palms | use chopsticks | write in cursive| use an electric drill | braid hair | make a campfire| make a mixed drink | do sudoku puzzles | wrap a gift | give a good massage | jump-start a car | roll their tongue | do magic tricks | do yoga | tie a tie | skip a rock | shuffle |read Morse code | pick a lock

Tagging the fabulous thekillerbishibot

[therainbowdrinkingjadeblood]

Starter for thekillerbishibot

Two trolls settled onto the upholstery nestcrevice, ready for a good old-fashioned marathon. The shorter one with the nubby ears, Karkat, was chatting loudly. “They’re going to be airing the first two seasons of Thresh Prince in its entirety today. Honestly, how did you ever live this long without ever watching this masterpiece? I mean, it even stars a jadeblood! You know how your cast is severely unrepresented in Alternian media, and Will Smith is basically the only great jadeblooded actor around.” He continued rambling as Kanaya searched for the distancemanagement device. The little bastard seemed to grow legs and walk away whenever it was needed. That was probably because it literally had legs. And eyes. And antennae. It was actually a bug. 

Her quick reflexes rewarded her as she snatched the screeching critter up. As Kanaya got comfortable, she turned on the polygonalplane transmitstation.

Karkat made near constant commentary as they began watching the broadcast together, but at this point Kanaya didn’t care. It was entertaining enough watching how passionate Karkat got, even if she could barely pay attention to the actual show due to his not having an inside voice.

Halfway through the second episode, however, there was a sudden blast of static as the transmission changed. While Karkat proceeded to flip his shit, Kanaya couldn’t take her eyes off the figure that appeared onscreen.

He was just...

so pink.

The robot appeared to be 50% glitter, 50% sparkles, and 110% drama. What really catches your attention,however, are the words “fashion,” “costume,” and “contest” being used within the same sentence. Even Karkat got quiet at seeing her reaction, and as a number appeared on the glassplane, he deadpanned, “I dare you to enter this thing.” Indeed, managing to come up with a truly fashionable garment while catering to the android’s (named ‘Mettaton,’ apparently,) sense of style, which made Her Imperious Condescension’s royal gatherings look sober, would be a challenge.

And never let it be said that Kanaya Maryam would back down from a challenge.

Dialing the number listed, she spoke like a troll tasked with defending her honor. “Hello, Mettaton? I wish to enter your contest.”

[dogsenpai]

what a great day 🐶💞

[oneeyedsharpshooter]

Reblog if it's alright for your muse to be given Christmas presents by other people's muses

[therainbowdrinkingjadeblood]

Starter for ask-the-english-tombraider

Kanaya Maryam stretched her arms languorously as she awoke, pushing the covers away from her body.

Covers.

Hmm.

No, that wasn’t right.

She opened her eyes and saw that she was indeed lying in a human bed, not her recuperacoon. Further inspection of these surroundings revealed the walls to be covered in what appeared to be movie posters of all types and genres. Down and to her left there appeared to be a small pile of firearms. There was a set of descending ambulatoryplanes smack dab in the middle of the respiteblock. A thick vine snaked up from below. As Kanaya realized that she was, in fact, asleep, she decided to go down to the house below.

Floating in the block at the bottom of the stairs was a human in god tier uniform. It looked completely ridiculous, to be blunt (Kanaya wanted to have a word with sgrub’s creator on the design of some of these outfits). The bottom half of the outfit appeared to be merely a pair of briefs followed by yellow socks and orange slippers. Definitely not something easy on the eyes, but worse things have happened in dream bubbles before. Barely.

The jadeblood spoke up. “Hello. I presume this to be your hive–ah, house.” she was pretty sure that that was the correct term.

[ask-the-english-tombraider]

Jake was sitting on the floor attempting to pester one of his chums, aggravated that everyone seemed to be ignoring him. The sound of the tapping from Jakes fingers seemed almost monotonous as he continued. He wanted to talk to someone. Anyone.

He heard slight rustling from the other side of the room. He looked over to see the young woman-

No.

Troll?

He looked over to see the young troll. Her hair was short, and a bit spiked on the sides. Her horns were tall and intimidating as she arose from laying down. She had grey skin. It was pale. A pale grey. Jake was curious as to why it wasnt darker like the other’s. As she pushed the his green and oddly printed covers away, he noticed what she was wearing. The pale trolls attire was made up of a shirt, it was black and had a symbol he felt like he was supposed to know, and skirt, it was red and reached down to her ankles. The side of it was ‘layered’ if you will, with parts of the same fabric. Little white buttons rimmed the edge of where the ‘layered’ fabric had stopped in the front. To complete the look, as she had stepped out of the bedding, was a simple pair of black flats with the smallest of heel.

It was an odd choice of clothing, but he didn’t judge as he reminded himself of what he was wearing. He turned his attention back up to the female standing before him.

“Yes. Ah well, no. But yes. As much as id love to go to that blasted place, this is just merely a dream bubble, my lady.” He accent seeped through each of his words, making him seem like more of a gentleman than he already was.

@therainbowdrinkingjadeblood

[therainbowdrinkingjadeblood]

Kanaya smiled grimly. “Yes, I miss my hive too sometimes. It’s rather sad to think that the only sunshine I ever see is in my dreams.” She paused and chuckled nervously. “That came out much more melodramatic than I meant to, haha.” Though Kanaya was the type of troll to seem to be always calm, cool, and collected, she would have to admit that meeting this new human was a somewhat awkward experience.

“So… I presume you enjoy mobile imagenarratives, seeing as your old respiteblock has wall-to-wall reproduced imageprint planes advertising them. Do you have any particular favorites?” Perhaps there was even one that overlapped in troll culture, which was incredibly likely considering the incredibly extensive history of Alternian cinema. If they ever met up again (which is somewhat unlikely) she could bring in Karkat and the three of them could have mobile imagenarrative days together.

[ask-the-english-tombraider]

Jake listened to the other, interested in what she had to say. “Its alright. Its not like that isnt the truth. He sighed softly and turned his attention away. Once the subject of his dumb and dorky posters plastering the entirety of his bedroom wall came up, his spirits instantly brightened. "Golly. Im not sure i have a favorite but i sure do have a lot that i like. Such as Avatar, Tomb Raider, and Star Wars.” Jakes expression was priceless. He loved talking about his passions that none of his friends liked hearing about. Dirk always thought Avatar sucked and Jake tried to prove him wrong everytime… The thought of Dirk made Jakes smile falter a bit. “Have you seen any other humans lately? None of my friends will answer me and I havent seen them since we laid on our Quest Beds.” Jake knew the feeling of missing his friends was overwhelming him but he asked anyways. Besides, he was more than happy to have the lovely lady here with him. @therainbowdrinkingjadeblood

[therainbowdrinkingjadeblood]

Kanaya shrugged. “I assume you aren’t friends with Dave or Rose, seeing as they’ve never mentioned you before. I’m afraid that otherwise I haven’t seen any other humans. Actually, my friend Aradia loves Tomb Raider. At least, she enjoyed the games. I’m not sure if she ever watched the mobile imagenarrative. Maybe you and I could watch it. I know nothing about the franchise, though. Would that affect my ability to follow the plotline?” She hoped this would distract him from his concerns. If he got overly emotional, she might overstep her boundaries and be overly conciliatory. Her sense of maternity led her into many sticky pale situations in the past, and she was not about to repeat that, let alone with a complete stranger.

[therainbowdrinkingjadeblood]

Starter for ask-the-english-tombraider

Kanaya Maryam stretched her arms languorously as she awoke, pushing the covers away from her body.

Covers.

Hmm.

No, that wasn’t right.

She opened her eyes and saw that she was indeed lying in a human bed, not her recuperacoon. Further inspection of these surroundings revealed the walls to be covered in what appeared to be movie posters of all types and genres. Down and to her left there appeared to be a small pile of firearms. There was a set of descending ambulatoryplanes smack dab in the middle of the respiteblock. A thick vine snaked up from below. As Kanaya realized that she was, in fact, asleep, she decided to go down to the house below.

Floating in the block at the bottom of the stairs was a human in god tier uniform. It looked completely ridiculous, to be blunt (Kanaya wanted to have a word with sgrub’s creator on the design of some of these outfits). The bottom half of the outfit appeared to be merely a pair of briefs followed by yellow socks and orange slippers. Definitely not something easy on the eyes, but worse things have happened in dream bubbles before. Barely.

The jadeblood spoke up. “Hello. I presume this to be your hive–ah, house.” she was pretty sure that that was the correct term.

[ask-the-english-tombraider]

Jake was sitting on the floor attempting to pester one of his chums, aggravated that everyone seemed to be ignoring him. The sound of the tapping from Jakes fingers seemed almost monotonous as he continued. He wanted to talk to someone. Anyone.

He heard slight rustling from the other side of the room. He looked over to see the young woman-

No.

Troll?

He looked over to see the young troll. Her hair was short, and a bit spiked on the sides. Her horns were tall and intimidating as she arose from laying down. She had grey skin. It was pale. A pale grey. Jake was curious as to why it wasnt darker like the other’s. As she pushed the his green and oddly printed covers away, he noticed what she was wearing. The pale trolls attire was made up of a shirt, it was black and had a symbol he felt like he was supposed to know, and skirt, it was red and reached down to her ankles. The side of it was ‘layered’ if you will, with parts of the same fabric. Little white buttons rimmed the edge of where the ‘layered’ fabric had stopped in the front. To complete the look, as she had stepped out of the bedding, was a simple pair of black flats with the smallest of heel.

It was an odd choice of clothing, but he didn’t judge as he reminded himself of what he was wearing. He turned his attention back up to the female standing before him.

“Yes. Ah well, no. But yes. As much as id love to go to that blasted place, this is just merely a dream bubble, my lady.” He accent seeped through each of his words, making him seem like more of a gentleman than he already was.

@therainbowdrinkingjadeblood

[therainbowdrinkingjadeblood]

Kanaya smiled grimly. “Yes, I miss my hive too sometimes. It’s rather sad to think that the only sunshine I ever see is in my dreams.” She paused and chuckled nervously. “That came out much more melodramatic than I meant to, haha.” Though Kanaya was the type of troll to seem to be always calm, cool, and collected, she would have to admit that meeting this new human was a somewhat awkward experience.

“So… I presume you enjoy mobile imagenarratives, seeing as your old respiteblock has wall-to-wall reproduced imageprint planes advertising them. Do you have any particular favorites?” Perhaps there was even one that overlapped in troll culture, which was incredibly likely considering the incredibly extensive history of Alternian cinema. If they ever met up again (which is somewhat unlikely) she could bring in Karkat and the three of them could have mobile imagenarrative days together.

[tragikarp]

[boredpanda]

[inverted-mind-inc-sideblog-deac]

Dogs.

[therainbowdrinkingjadeblood]

Starter for ask-the-english-tombraider

Kanaya Maryam stretched her arms languorously as she awoke, pushing the covers away from her body.

Covers.

Hmm.

No, that wasn’t right.

She opened her eyes and saw that she was indeed lying in a human bed, not her recuperacoon. Further inspection of these surroundings revealed the walls to be covered in what appeared to be movie posters of all types and genres. Down and to her left there appeared to be a small pile of firearms. There was a set of descending ambulatoryplanes smack dab in the middle of the respiteblock. A thick vine snaked up from below. As Kanaya realized that she was, in fact, asleep, she decided to go down to the house below.

Floating in the block at the bottom of the stairs was a human in god tier uniform. It looked completely ridiculous, to be blunt (Kanaya wanted to have a word with sgrub’s creator on the design of some of these outfits). The bottom half of the outfit appeared to be merely a pair of briefs followed by yellow socks and orange slippers. Definitely not something easy on the eyes, but worse things have happened in dream bubbles before. Barely.

The jadeblood spoke up. “Hello. I presume this to be your hive--ah, house.” she was pretty sure that that was the correct term.

[schvdenfrevde-blog]

psa ;; please never expect me to respond quickly to anything ever. whether or not it’s a thread, it’s an ask, it’s a meme — whether or not I responded quickly the time before — whether or not I’m online — etc, etc, etc. I promise I’m not ignoring you, I promise I’m doing my best. I have tons of responsibilities not related to tumblr, && I also need to eat && sleep && sometimes I’m just not emotionally game. It’s not because I don’t like you, it’s not because I don’t want to do the thing, it’s because I’m human. show a little consideration, please && thank you!

[somekh]

MY MUSE IS NOT ALWAYS RIGHT

   Please keep in mind that, however hard my muse may argue something or however confidently they make a statement, they can be wrong. It’s my muse’s opinion, and my muse talking, and their perception is skewed.               Do not feel like everything out of my character’s mouth is the truth, or that I’m godmodding. 

[boastmastergeneral]

reblog this if i can tumblr im you, just slamming a muse or plot idea down in front of you

[pcthetics-deactivated20161211]

this doesn’t mean that you have to accept or agree with the idea - i’m just a scared little turtle that would like to know if that’s something that you wouldn’t mind so much 

[gifak-net]

[tayzawa]

[parakavka]

[sexhaver]

"i can’t fucking read"

[joannus]

this meme is both excellent and educational

[therainbowdrinkingjadeblood]

I Never Got Why Lowblood Slash Midblood And Highblood Vernacular Has To Be So Different

Im Supposed To Say Ablution Trap Whereas Highbloods Can Just Say Bathtub

I Kind Of Wish That I Could Use Highblood Vernacular Without Risk Of Culling

It Is Really A Lot Simpler That Way