therapyshake

therapy shake

[therapyshake]

what if I went by any pronouns. as a treat.

[therapyshake]

Whatever shitty feeling you’re feeling will pass. It will pass and you will be okay and happy again. Everything will fall back into place; your anxiety will breathe and you will be able to as well. It will pass.

[therapyshake]

Being around people, even just in the same room as people doing their own thing, helps me feel better. Also live music/singing is FUCKING AWESOME

[therapyshake]

Stuff I learned today:

Dancing can drastically improve your mood

Being hydrated is badass but maybe don’t drink all at once because you might feel funny in a bad way (pace your drinking of water but Do Drink Water)

You need to have stud earrings on you at all times in case a Jam Session occurs (earrings can apparently fall out while dancing if they’re not secured properly

[therapyshake]

I’m really fucking angry that I have executive dysfunction. Most people don’t. Others get to just think of what they want to do and just. Fucking do it. I have to fight past walls and barriers that are so fucking hard to get past in order to just get out of fucking bed much less do anything else. Call to get insurance?? Schedule an appointment?? You might as well be asking me to walk to the fucking moon in 2 hours!! I can’t fucking do it! Why do other people get to have the correct brain chemicals?!! It’s not fucking fair and I’m so angry about it.

[therapyshake]

Plan (to myself) for how to uhhhhhhhhh Function this afternoon

1. Un-executive dysfunction yourself from scrolling tumblr on the bathroom floor

2. Human cleaning: teeth, deodorant. You bathed recently morning so that’s fine.

3. Play music. This helps the Brain Go

4. Depending on how the Brain feels, clean the living room or kitchen or bathroom. Do all three; but let the Brain decide the order

5. If overwhelmed, take break. Please for the love of all fucks ever given SET A GODDMANDED timer so you don’t “take a break” for 5 genuine hours

6. Congrats!! You did human things! And your house is cleaner!! Time to play games and listen to music

7. Consistently be drinking water you fucker /affectionate

[therapyshake]

Places/times where Time Itself fails to exist:

Immediately after waking up. Bathroom at work. Walking. Just walking. Sims 4 loading screen. Minecraft loading screen. Shower/bathtub. Microwave. Grocery store.

[therapyshake]

Every now and then (it’s actually only happened twice so far recently I think?) I have a moment where I remember “oh yeah I’m fucking alive” and I get the urge to do all the things all at once.

[therapyshake]

Just realized that the chair I use as a gaming chair is actually technically a rocking chair. It’s an old fabric covered chair but!! It rocks!!! This is now my Favorite Fucking thing and I actually made this blog so I could write down how excited I am about it and not forget about it later. Therapist if you’re reading this hi I have a cool chair at my house. I sit in it while gaming since I have a computer mouse now instead of a touchpad. So now sitting in the chair is one of my favorite activities since I get to play games which is my special interest at the moment. Hopefully I’ll remember to explain to my therapist what special interests are and why they’re so important to me.

[therapyshake]

I make words. I use they/xe/it pronouns. This is subject to change; I’ll update this post if any life updates are important enough to put here. I have a shitty memory and constantly feel like Something Bad Is About To Happen, so in order to combat that I’m making this blog. My therapist (when I get back in touch with her after fighting the gods of health insurance and executive dysfunction) will probably see this blog. It’s easier to record thoughts when they happen, then have them for later, than think “I’ll remember” and Instantly Forget. Anyways uhhh if you’re here thanks for reading, uh take care. I won’t be using this blog for reblogs, only original content out of my brain hole from here. Name? Heck if I know. Call me therapyshake.

10/29 update: I’ll tag every post that this applies with potentially triggering topics, so please watch out, but I know sometimes I’ll talk about triggering things. Don’t read if you don’t want to. Thanks. And know at the end of the day I’ll take care of myself; that’s why I made this blog after all. I just have to get my thoughts out of my head in order to deal with them properly.