Stop calling me "Malasada Guy"!

// pkmn irl blog unreality disclaimer. this is just the spot in pokemon lol. (on indefinite hiatus because i based the blog on a short hyperfixation)

[therealwormhole-official]

Ooh wow ok, I finally got this account to work! Hope you guys like my speech, I've been working reeeeeelly hard on it!

Attention Rotomblr!

I… AM THE WORMHOLE.

He/him. I was once Johnathon Ohnn and thats fine I guess but I’d at least like you to use my new evil name too so I can strike fear into my enemies' hearts please!!

And no I'm not an Ultra Beast, or any other kind Pokemon, and I'm NOT a villain of the week!

What I am is the nemesis of all you Spinirak-people out there. Also the Joltick-people, and the Dewpider-people, and, ooh, there's a Spidops too? Oh I've always wanted to visit Paldea, super fascinating wildlife and phenomena!

But nevermind that! I did hugely important dimensional studies at Aether. I'm the reason a lot of you are here, tied together by this website! And what's the thanks that I got? You heroes beat me and left me behind in the Alola disaster so an Ultra Wormhole could turn me into THIS!

Then I got fired from my job, then my family stopped talking to me, then I had to start robbing people and… ah, sorry, maybe I'll just catch you up on the little details later. The important part is this:

All of you watch your backs. Especially anyone involved in the Alola incident who led to my downfall and insists on ignoring me!

I am your nemesis!

if you'll have me. And don't make fun of my Pokemon names!!! I think they're cute.

// hi @swadloom again uh. this is literally just the Spot in pkmn irl LMAOO. inspired by blogs like @spidops-woman and @araquanid-man that also crossover pkmn and spiderverse lore hehe.

design is a wip. uhhhh. idk im sleepy <3 you can bully him, im bad at events but i'll try, no gross ppl you know who you are, etc etc gn :]

[therealwormhole-official]

// rereading this blog and thinking maaaan I used to be funny /lh

[therealwormhole-official]

// Been having fun with the muse swap but trying to make it progress has been too hard with my executive functioning so I'm ending it by handwaving things whoops </3 just assume that like Val got back to his house and kicked the Wormhole's ass and fixed everything djdkfkfkdkf

[therealwormhole-official]

🍨 where am i

[a-champion-of-stars]

Ah more confusion, hello there, do you by chance have any idea what’s going either?

[therealwormhole-official]

🍨 Well, I guess based on the rest of the blog this weird scientist guy wants to study a "blog mixup" thing that's been going on? I think we were kidnapped to help or something but me and Milky Way fell asleep at the bottom of the bag.

🍵 >_>

🍵 <_<

🍵 o_o????

🍨 You got that right, buddy. What do we do now!? Hrmph :p

[therealwormhole-official]

🍨 where am i

[starblessed-blasterz]

🌌 Aha, ahaha! Hey look, I'm in! IT WORKED! TAKE THAT, EVERYONE!! THE WORMHOLE WINS AGAIN!!!

🌌 actually I'm pretty sure this might be the first time I've won at like. Any of these

[starblessed-blasterz]

🌌 OWHOWOOWW. Man this kid has some crazy little fighters on their team! Or I guess, in their house? Since the others he would have in Pokeballs

🌌 I'll keep you all updated on whether stealing them is worth the risk or not~! Some of them seem like they can kinda stand looking at me!

[therealwormhole-official]

Dum dadadaaaah~! The portal is done, pretty cool right? I don't think that lightning is normal, though...

BAAAAAH, what do I have to loose? See you on another blog!

[therealwormhole-official]

Welcome back, was convinced that you got arrested for a moment. Here's to hoping you choose the good in your heart.

(@nanaboo-pumpkaboo )

One: Hello there! Two: I'm not even sure how I would get arrested and stay arrested! And three, quit it with all that! Especially now of all times you're not gonna get me with that same sentiment so many lied to me with back in the Aether days, when they really just wanted me locked up, away from my only real friends!

That being my Pokemon of course. I mean who else would I be friends with in Aether, Kaba? Pshhhhh, imagine that.

[nanaboo-pumpkaboo]

Mhm, of course, I have heard a great deal of what the Aether Foundation did even this far away. Glad you at the very least have your team to help lift you back up, try to keep them safe.

[therealwormhole-official]

Uh huh! I also have some Ultra Beasts and two real-life mythical beings I just stole from a guy so I can investigate a Rotomblr phenomena! So that's gonna help out even MORE! Man I'm so excited!!!

[cookinguptrouble]

Humph...

Be me.

Travel to Alola with my mates for a commission from some folks operating out of a mall, the exact weirdo circumstances my hell life slots perfect into!

Me and my gang pop out of a food court and put on our big scary act to dissuade some people investigating things.

ULTRA WORMHOLE appears in the MIDDLE OF THE MALL and, and it like? Flies into them and just gets them!?

Does this stuff just happen in this region now?? Is this normal for you people?

[therealwormhole-official]

Yeah that kinda stuff just happens here, I wouldn't worry about it personally

[starblessed-blasterz]

Prev was an Aether scientist and is an openly malicious alter ego don't listen to him!! 👎 I wouldn't usually care since you're both villains but I know Ultra Wormholes aren't supposed to fly around in buildings like that!!

[therealwormhole-official]

uhhhhi excuse me suhhhsir you're a science type right? You uhhh you seem to know a lot do you have like. A laaaaaab maybe? Just on the off chance??

[starblessed-blasterz]

One of my prides and joys!!! :>

If you're interested I could have you over under supervision by my team and maybe teach you something about heroism!!

[therealwormhole-official]

Oho, ohohoyeah!! I will totally do that, actually, I just gotta finish up what I'm doing here reeeeeeeeal quick, if you don't mind!

[cookinguptrouble]

Humph...

Be me.

Travel to Alola with my mates for a commission from some folks operating out of a mall, the exact weirdo circumstances my hell life slots perfect into!

Me and my gang pop out of a food court and put on our big scary act to dissuade some people investigating things.

ULTRA WORMHOLE appears in the MIDDLE OF THE MALL and, and it like? Flies into them and just gets them!?

Does this stuff just happen in this region now?? Is this normal for you people?

[therealwormhole-official]

Yeah that kinda stuff just happens here, I wouldn't worry about it personally

[starblessed-blasterz]

Prev was an Aether scientist and is an openly malicious alter ego don't listen to him!! 👎 I wouldn't usually care since you're both villains but I know Ultra Wormholes aren't supposed to fly around in buildings like that!!

[therealwormhole-official]

uhhhhi excuse me suhhhsir you're a science type right? You uhhh you seem to know a lot do you have like. A laaaaaab maybe? Just on the off chance??

[therealwormhole-official]

Welcome back, was convinced that you got arrested for a moment. Here's to hoping you choose the good in your heart.

(@nanaboo-pumpkaboo )

One: Hello there! Two: I'm not even sure how I would get arrested and stay arrested! And three, quit it with all that! Especially now of all times you're not gonna get me with that same sentiment so many lied to me with back in the Aether days, when they really just wanted me locked up, away from my only real friends!

That being my Pokemon of course. I mean who else would I be friends with in Aether, Kaba? Pshhhhh, imagine that.

[cookinguptrouble]

Humph...

Be me.

Travel to Alola with my mates for a commission from some folks operating out of a mall, the exact weirdo circumstances my hell life slots perfect into!

Me and my gang pop out of a food court and put on our big scary act to dissuade some people investigating things.

ULTRA WORMHOLE appears in the MIDDLE OF THE MALL and, and it like? Flies into them and just gets them!?

Does this stuff just happen in this region now?? Is this normal for you people?

[therealwormhole-official]

Yeah that kinda stuff just happens here, I wouldn't worry about it personally

[therealwormhole-official]

Don't do it.

You're gonna have to try a lot harder than that to dissuade me, anon! Hahaha!

I mean at least an exclamation point or more than three words. I get the feeling you don't really care that much...

[therealwormhole-official]

Hello Rotomblr! Wow, been a while huh? You see, I heard about this funny business going on with all these blog runners getting swapped, and as the real bigwig when it comes to all this dimensional stuff, it gave me a little idea for some observational science!! Or an experiment as a bunch would think about it, but that's actually wrong, an experiment has controlled variables and hypothesis and all.

Anywaaayss, I'd say I nabbed a pretty good haul of helpers for my plans, one of them even posed for the picture!

I was kinda pouty about the authorities at this mall turning all their attention to a different villain and his Pokemon here, but one well-placed wormhole and burlap sack later, and tah-dah! Now the perfect combo of Ultra Beasts and psychic roamers alike to assist in my portal are MINE! Aha! Ahahahaha! Ahehe! And so on!

Now, I just need to find the perfect user to be the target of my crime...

[spinarak-bite]

ok, so I have Black Glameow, The Wormhole, this buzzwole guy who might not even be real or might be a superhero

things are getting interesting here in alola

[spinarak-bite]

Well, since it doesn't seem like a good time for my super important destined battle for them anyways (they have anxiety and I pulled a muscle today) maybe temporarily capturing his nemesis as a sign of peace would work? I mean cmooooon I'm evil but I'm not gonna get in the way of such adorable little lovebirds!

- @therealwormhole-official

lovebi-

I-

NO-

WAIT-

THIS-

*peanut.exe has stopped working*

aww

they are so adorable aren't they

[therealwormhole-official]

Yeaaaaaaaah~

[spinarak-bite]

A Delibird flies in with a neatly wrapped gift box! Tied to it is a note.

"I wanted to make a robot box to attack you or something like that but I don't really have the stuff I need for that right now, sooooooo maybe just like, hit yourself on the head with this? Thanks! - YOUR NEMESIS"

Inside are a set of printed pictures of The Wormhole posing at the camera and wearing a Delibird Day hat while, in the background, Faba can be seen cowering in terror at Glips the Nihilego. It goes from him making a peace sign, to pretending to crush Faba's head between his fingers, to pretending to pat Glips on the head while Faba's gaze turns to the camera, with a final blurred picture of the Wormhole and Glips fleeing the scene.

Accompanying those are some old gaming magazines, mostly SNES era and adjacent. Some have Johnathon written on the inside, presumably they're old ones he used to own!

- @therealwormhole-official

I was so fuckin scared of opening this box after what I gave you

but now I am laughing my ass off

TAKE THAT YOU PROJECT OF A TWINK