This is the story of how I became a criminal while also learning a few things about myself, none of which are positive.
Part One
I think we’ve all broken the law at some point, let’s just get that out of the way. If you claim to have never jaywalked then you’re either a liar or from Los Angeles. And there are those obscure old-timey laws that are still on the books about, like, women wearing flat shoes on a Thursday. But more than that, we make little infractions from time to time that maybe don’t break the law, but certainly bend, even fracture it. Say, toilet papering a house, or parking on the wrong side of the street on cleaning day. Sometimes you get away with it, and sometimes you get caught, get a ticket and go along with your day.
This time, the system broke down right around step 2.











