...achieving outcomes, going forward.

The official tumblr of Goblin Deeznuts a.k.a. DJ Bungler, founding member of the Eggs-Steady Crew a.k.a. the fake thewetmale: previously an anonymous troll, markovian parallax denigrate, and faceless blogger, now a feminist CIA agent, proud responsible presbyterian mother of 3.2 kids, post-partisan rationalist, noted tumblrer, respected mainstream publisher, social media guerrilla, brand ambassador for thirst favs, Australian app developer, founder of Statler-Waldorf research, OAM, and 5 Walkleys. #OhDeb. Also since September 9th, 2011, has been living proof that the use of real names doesn't prevent trolling. Neva 5get As a member of the right to know coalition i also declare myself a founding member of the #SMEGmilitia who is firmly ensconced in the pocket of Big Meme. Representing philosophy in a clown suit I deliver vacuum sealed fruit served slightly chilled. The right to publish all correspondence, especially from other members of the right to know coalition, is reserved. Any claims of being a lizardman will need to be rectified with the payment of $10,000 by the following Monday. If not, I am professional Russian; worst case scenario, i fuck their shit up. Currently behind 7 proxies so good luck backtracing! A Labor voter all my life, as of 2014 I will be a counsellor at JuLIAR's camps. Abbott '13, Coup d'état '14 LOL, jks! "The Moon Man" - @breko "...who could be the killer app of internet trolling." - Niall Ferguson "Mr popularity" - @nelled "Can't spell thewetmale without meta" - @allyouzombies "Internet Hero" - @jonathonio "this man needs attention from a clinical psychiatrist" - @jonathonio "Patient zero of internet trolling" - @mtats "History's worst monster" - Ed Butler "your penis is far superior to mine" - @teaislovely "Ouroboros cock 2013" - @courteneyh "shithouse cross-meme sub-trolling [that should be taken] to livejournal" - @s_bridges "Cert. IV (Sub)tweet" - @liamvhogan "Follow @thewetmale for your peristalsis, digestion, and bowel related content" - @liamvhogan Disregard all references to @mischa76, they are sickening and wrong. My other places: twitter youtube Diigo

[thewetmale]

Honestly, for mine, this ICAC season is up there with any Classic Simpsons, in the division of The Wire or The Sopranos, exceeded only by 2005 and 2012 in my lifetime.

'Don't give me that look': Icac witness reprimanded during corruption investigation – video

It is not clear if witness's comment was directed at counsel assisting Peggy Dwyer SC or someone else in the room

[thewetmale]

Serious posting for a second: I’m pretty happy that the dress code for my current job is casual but no trackies. We share an office with an actual sales business where people wear suits. I think they all look great but am quite happy not having to iron 5 dress shirts every week.

When I was a high school teacher I worked at a school that had a policy against students wearing hoodies and so that meant staff as well. I could live with it at the time and I get why they had that policy; all the staff were really cohesive there and the school had a strong culture. Another school I worked at had a extracurricular dance group that would compete each year against other schools. One of the reasons for being in the dance club was to get the official hoodie each year when it was comp time. The teacher that ran the group basically lived in her dance hoodie.

I do like getting all dressed up for occasions which merit it. I feel fantastic when I wear my whole addidas tracksuit to Swans games and likewise have enjoyed going a waistcoat and tie when I’ve been asked to sit in with the Melbourne Ska Orchestra. I have played in many bands with differing degrees of dress code over the years and it’s helped me develop a greater sense of meaning in how I dress.

I have also been persuaded by Liam that polo-shirts are underrated and actually almost perfectly matched to many Australian workplace scenarios; at the school that banned hoodies many teachers voluntarily wore school polos.

That is unless you’re Mark Latham attending the PM’s XI cricket game. I guess that’s the exception that makes the rule.

[thewetmale]

“Only once Seppos get red and nude at this account for not skeeting about Trump will we know if this site has the juice”

- Eggs, 1967-1994

[thewetmale]

Celery great just on its own, also goes well in salad, cooked in a stir-fry, and comes pre-designed with a pocket for adding spread/dip content. Up there with madarins for convenience and with bananas for versatility as well imo.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ will continue to keep in my fridge.

[thewetmale]

Expectations Management

Last night I took the dog for a walk at about 6:30. She likes a good stroll and we went via a dog park where there were a couple of other canines out for a late stroll. We got home about 7:45. I made some dinner while finishing the latest True Bloods podcast and polished it off watching my club’s former coach on AFL 360. After dinner I popped on an episode of a drama then went to bed.

Scrolling a bit before bed and this morning has left me feeling really a bit bemused because everyone I follow seems red and nude about the PM’s address to the nation. I did make one shitpost about it myself but nothing that required engagement with the source text, just riffing off of Liam.

Did we all want it to be Covid again? Is there some fix to this crisis he could’ve announced that he didn’t? I was vaguely aware he was making some announcement but I was working all day then the dog always needs a walk, I and her needed to eat dinner… I honestly don’t understand what all of the fuss is about.

A number of years ago a bloke who claims to be a Possum recommended that, during an election campaign, if you’re want to experience it in the way that swing voters do that you should watch the 6pm nightly news but tune out all other election coverage. I think that was the initial catalyst for me to rethink why I pay attention to media made for the highly politically engaged. I realised that it’s very similar to why I watch and listen to sports programming: an attempt to understand the game in the way that those that play the game see it, but perhaps to a greater extent, to manage the emotional waves of winning and losing.

You can watch all the footy shows, and listen to all the podcasts and radio segments you like, but ultimately it won’t give you a much greater understanding of the likelihood of your team winning compared to what you’d get from looking at last week’s results and chewing the fat with your mates. Once you realise that, you can appreciate entertainment products for what they are and make your choices accordingly.

The drama I have been watching is called Criminal. Here in Australia it’s on Netflix, I have been enjoying it and would recommend. It’s a dramatised version of what Jim, who can’t swim, does. As with most cop shows, I wouldn’t recommend it if you’re a player in the game looking to get an edge on your opponent, but it is British so it’s quite pleasant to listen to.

[thewetmale]

I haven’t been exercising much lately after having a fluey thing a couple of months ago that had a long-tail cough. Tonight was my second week back at Monday training, trying to make it part of my routine again. Small cohort there tonight but a satisfying session.

Sydney’s Centennial Park is definitionally #GloriousSydney even at the worst of times. Add in being surrounded by other people Beefcaking - running, cycling, walking - on a mild March evening and it’s not hard to feel motivated.

My sister is on a carb-on-carb thing this year which is tremendous inspiration. After Monday evening beefcake I usually don’t have much time to make dinner. When you add in having been away with band stuff all weekend tonight was strictly a using up leftovers night as well.

The end result: fried small potato cubes with rice, boiled egg, and soy sauce. A++ meal. Wish I had twice as much.

I was particularly happy with how the potato came out. I’m trying to get better at being patient when frying food to get better crusts. It occurs to me that potato would be a great test to use on the regular.

[thewetmale]

Good dogs

Footy is, as they say, back. It's already feeling good to be a Bulldogs fan, what with a surprising win last week (against Brisbane) and an

Fuck yeah footy blogging

[thewetmale]

“Oh yeah you can fit the whole family inside including the dog but it also has a tray so you can pretend to be a tradie and it’s compensating/projecting up the wazoo” “oh yeah we’ve got distorted guitars but there’s also a white guy in a baseball cap rapping plus there’s a guy scratching up the back nah it’ll just be like the original Woodstock; peace love and fun acid announcements”

Source: Harris-Rustla, E., (2026) https://aus.social/@thewetmale/116005689375732782

@ThermiteBeGiants @liamvhogan Hell yeah. Life was better when we had small sporty hatchbacks, luxurious sedans, big box wagons (RIP in peas

[thewetmale]

Tonight I’m going to play board games at my mate’s place in Asquith. I’m running a little late and there’s trackwork + bustitution from Chatswood to at least Hornsby. Fortunately the metro is here to the rescue to take me to Epping. What’s extra Glorious is that the metro will line me up with a 10-car Mariyung to Hornsby. Two of the newest rail vehicle types in Australia. I’m actually buzzing.

[thewetmale]

So I played at a corporate Christmas party tonight. Held in a venue in The Rocks, there was a team of maybe 7-8 chefs cooking across form the stage, a cloak room that was proving quite popular, and quite a number of people there were in serious dress up mode. I think it was for some commercial law firm or something idk. I was playing with a trio for an hour, notionally as guests are arriving. After we finished a covers band was to kick into gear.

Before the covers band started a guy gave a speech.I don't know what level of seniority he was, or what he saw as the purpose of their speech, but it was just this bland Linkedin speak bullshit. He announced they were very excited for, iirc, a re-branding that would be announced next year, celebrated how the firm was positioned "in the market", and placed this in the context of a fresh 5-year plan. It left me wondering if this is what most people experience a Christmas party as.

Reflecting on it now, it also brings to mind a lot of sports administration in this country (looking at you, AFL), but I digress…

I haven't ever worked for a big company or an org that would be throwing much money around for a Christmas party; any Christmas parties I've ever been to have been low-key affairs held in small spaces in venues. It's interesting getting to have this view in a whole other world.

I definitely take some satisfaction/pleasure out of being a hired gun at an event like this. I appreciate that I get to see the world 'behind the scenes' - to hear the covers band warm up and sound check - my brain is definitely stimulated by getting to see events come together. The most satisfying though is to be reminded that even a standard performance of my role as a saxophonist is perceived by many people to be pretty magical. It's also liberating to have a space in my life for a form of labor where I have the independence to set my own standard of performance and where I experience a genuine form of professional development almost every day I show up to work.

Also I caught the metro to and from, walking from Barangaroo. I caught busses from my apartment to Chatswood Station. I normally walk to Chatswood station but, carrying about 10kg of gear, in the Glorious Sydney humidity, while dressed in performance blacks, it was really nice to have the option of a frequent, air-conditioned bus service to reduce the walk time. Also nice to see the Barangaroo metro station again. I can't wait for people on the Bankstown line to have that direct connection and what it could do for how people move around this city that I love.

[thewetmale]

Just dropped off a mate at the place he’s staying in town and at the exit of the drop off area was an ibis that was struggling to stand up let alone move. I’m guessing it was hit by a car.

Didn’t know what to do but I couldn’t stand to see it struggling like that. Eventually someone from Sydney Wildlife Rescue rang me back and talked me through how to help. As it was I had a Harris Farm cardboard tray in the boot and a piece of hessian so I grabbed old mate and drove them what ended up being all of two blocks to a 24hr wildlife accepting vet. (Do all vets take injured wildlife? Let me know in the comments).

I’m guessing it will be put down and I’ve just had a bit of a cry in the car because seeing anything that injured is pretty brutal. Nice to know I could help in some way.

Farewell bin chicken mate, it was nice knowing you. I hope you had a good life.

[thewetmale]

Hilltop Hoods - Left Foot, Right Foot (full album)

Back Once Again - Hilltop Hoods Released 1997 Recorded at X Bred Studios, Adelaide Mastered: Neville Clarke Producer: Matthew Lambert (track

Year 12 was 2003 for me and I was in my element with The Herd’s an Elephant Never Forgets. I hated John Howard and very much connected to an artistic voice pushing back against the dominant politics of the post-9/11 world.

There was a guy at my school that had been in the year above but did year 12 over two years. When I was in year 7 or 8 he was really intimidating because he was smoking cigarettes in the gym changerooms, part of a big bong smokers group that occupied certain places at every recess and lunch. In 2003 though he was ~obsessed~ with the Hilltop Hoods and especially Left Foot Right Foot. He was a pretty good actor and we connected in year 12 Drama class. Also helps that I was also partial to alternative medicine by that time myself.

He burnt me a copy of Left Foot Right Foot - tagged with his best sharpie - and damn near coached me to learn all the lyrics to Seasons Change. Definitely a track to appeal to teenage boys itching to get out of school. Still do remember most of those lyrics I’ve just discovered.

Listening to this album again at lunch

a) thanks to Yobbo and Beeso from the Tripping Balls podcast for the suggestion

b) these guys can really write and rap at a pretty high level

c) the Koolism guest on Another World reminds me of how Aussie hip hop really hit a purple patch in the early 2000s

d) on the last pod, Beeso was talking about artists/acts that lose an edge when they get the money for proper production equipment; I am really loving the production of this album. Maybe because I’m listening to it and remembering that tagged up burnt copy that i had in high rotation for a few years.

[thewetmale]

My current phone is an iPhone 8+, about 8 years old now. It works fine enough although it would be nice to be on the latest OS.

The main issue is the battery is pretty cooked. Saturday mornings I can find it needing a recharge after only about 4-5 hours. This morning I played a podcast from it through a Bluetooth speaker while I had breakfast and a shower then have been listening to music through headphones on the train while posting and we’re already down to 75%. It will generally get to the end of a workday but I always carry a battery.

I’ve been thinking about an upgrade for a bit and iPhones are coming into season in a couple of months. Choosing the latest, high end spec version worked pretty well in 2017 so I’m thinking of doing the same again but maybe I should go with something a little older because they are pretty spenno these days and the new features aren’t exactly groundbreaking these days. I figure you’re basically playing for future proofing.

One thing I do know is that I’ll miss the fingerprint ID. Infuriating to get rid of that imo.

[thewetmale]

[thewetmale]

Yvette is making brisket. Both in the final episode of The Wire and in the 2nd episode where we first meet the lawyer of choice for Baltimore drug dealers, Yvette's husband Maurice Levy. I don't know if I would've discovered this easter egg on my own and I dearly thank David Simon and others for their wonderful commentary tracks on the DVD releases of The Wire.

David is especially fond of planting little nuggets like this. As a fan of references to the Table Of Knowledge I understand the appeal. Sadly commentary tracks seemed to have disappeared from our media consumption patterns. I guess it doesn't fit the business model of either the tiktoks or the netflixes of the world but I would've thought there would be serious demand for them, especially for classic shows like The Wire that are so rich in detail. Also how hard would it be to add that as an option on streaming platforms?

One of my favourite DVDs is a collection of Smashing Pumpkins video clips. They were a band very much in their prime during the prime of music videos. The DVD has not just commentary tracks for each song but an alternate "angle" which was collections of outtakes. As a fan of their music, but especially as a child of the 90s in general, this is absolutely sensational content.

[thewetmale]

h/t to reader Liam of Stanmore

[thewetmale]

I’m catching the train to work today for the first time in many weeks. Days I’m in the office my puppy has daycare at my parents’ and it’s usually easier to keep driving in from there. I miss catching the train to work. I am fortunate to live in a part of Sydney that, now with the Metro open from Chatswood to Sydenham, probably has the best public transport options of anywhere.

I was scrolling my socials when I came across a post on Bluesky linking to an article apparently about Mark Zuckerberg submitting to a court evidence that his company is deliberately making the experience of online worse to make money. Just before that someone else was posting about the benefits of blogs for dissemination of information so I thought I’d use the last two stops before I have to get off to punch out this post.

Thanks to my playlist for having this in my ears as I finish typing. https://tidal.com/track/184694978?u