A scene of intimacy and trust - (teenage!Pope x teenage fem!reader)
Trigger warning: conversations and mentions of self harm, depression. Display of nudity.
Author´s note: Thought I would try something a little delicate. I hope I did it justice. If anyone understands pain I feel it's Pope Cody. Enjoy the read and please know if you are struggling with what is mentioned you are loved and Pope loves you too <3.
- Meena
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There were many different ways in how this night could have ended for you. On the sofa with your parents watching game shows, reading to your sibling before bed or even just helping clean out the garage - a project your dad had started before he realized the amount of stuff that your family had accumulated over the years and slowly given the task to your siblings.
Instead you where standing in your underwear in your darkly lit bedroom with the blinds folded down and your door locked. A door you rarely lock except for when you are changing and dont want your mom or siblings to come in.
The light of your lava lamp and another bedside lamp were the only sources of light in the room. Andrew was sitting fully clothed on your bed watching you as you walked back and forth from between your dresser and your desk trying to find the guts to say what you wanted.
You would glance over at him periodically as he looked at you stoic and slightly confused at why you were pacing back and forth. There was no liquid courage for what you were about to do so pacing felt self soothing.
“You wanna tell me why I am here?” he asked and scratched himself quickly on the shoulder. His cheeks slightly red from still not being used to seeing you in just your underwear. There were small multi colored flowers on the white fabric of them and he could see your stomach hanging out from your t shirt that seemed too small for a pajamas.
“I wanna ask you a favor” you continue pacing and talking to him “Its rather sensitive” you say and stop crossing your arms waiting for his reaction.
Andrew arches his brows and makes a face of discontent at first: “I’m not beating anyone up for you”
“No!” you put your hand up and shake your head “No, I dont need that. Its something else” you continue and go back to pacing back and forth as he combs his fingers through his curls: “If its not that, then what do you want?”
You glance over at him where he is sitting in his jeans, tennis shoes and a dark blue polo shirt. His hair has that perfect curly bounce to it probably cause the weather had been colder lately.
“Go on..” he looks at you his eyes searching, inpatient and soft all at the same time signaling like you could trust him with this favor.
“I want you to see me naked” you blur out and feel the heat rise in your cheeks and your palms start to do that annoying thing where they sweat. “Before you say no..” you say, but get interrupted by Andrew shaking his head: “Okay”
The acceptance from him takes you back a little. Its not something you excepted, but he is a guy you think. A guy that initially has no idea what you have in store for him.
“Okay” you nod and stand still again maintaining eye contact “There is just one thing about my body that I need you to be aware of”
Andrew looks confused again the lines wrinkling between his eyes and his eyebrows arching as he shakes his head: “But why are you doing this?”
“I trust you” you blur out almost instinctively as you put your hands on your bare hips; “You are not afraid of the gore” you say and step a little closer into the light of your bedside lamp.
“Just cause my family are who they are dont mean I can deal with everything” he says softly and offers a quick smile, “No, but I have seen you patch up people with duck tape. I know you can handle what I am about to show you” you say nervously and put your palms together pointing your hands at him; “but nobody can know what I am about to show you”
“Who would I tell that would be interested?” Andrew scuffs and you find it a valid point. Nobody at school even notices you or pays you any mind.
“Fair enough” you say and take off the small shirt now exposing your entire stomach and standing there in just your bra and panties.
“I need you not to judge me” you whisper as you unclasp your bra. Andrew follows your every move with his eyes and keeps his hands on his knees for support.
The bra falls as you hook your thumbs around your panties and pull them down quickly stepping out of them now standing only in a pair of fluffy teal socks.
Andrew looks over your body as you see his eyes soften further while they glance down between your legs to your cunt. “What exactly am I looking for?” he asks trying not to sound impatient while rubbing the palms of his hands against his jeans.
“Imma step a little closer and I beg you please be kind. I trust you. Remember!” you say feeling the lump in your throat grow by every word uttered.
“Alright” he nods reassuringly and keeps his eyes on you as you step further into the light of your night lamp.
What the light exposes are old scars on the inside of your thighs spreading all the way to over your lower abdomen. The lines start again underneath your breasts speeding between them. You keep your eyes forward looking behind Andrew at your blinds, trying to avoid his initial reaction.
“Who did this to you?” he sounds outraged and leans his head forward to your thighs making you feel subconscious over how you could probably have waxed a little closer to your bikini line.
“I did it” you say coldly still trying to keep that lump in your throat from growing bigger and taking over your speech. It felt intrusive having him looking at you so exposed and now he was coming closer adjusting his body to the edge of his seat to get a better look.
“Why?” he asks and puts a hand on your stomach making you jolt back a little suprised that he was now touching you. “I’m sorry” he voices in reaction.
“No, it's fine. You can touch me. I need to be okay with that” you say glad that he was not running for the hills or feeling disgusted by you. “And I did it because my feelings where too big for my body and I was ashamed of this until now”
“I get that” Andrew responds under his breath still stroking his warm hand over your abdomen reaching your inner thighs, brushing his thumb over the small healed cuts.
“Its like you got struck by lightning and survived” he looked up at you in a sense of awe with no judgement in him and that made you exhale in a short whispered; “Thank you”
Andrew smiled fully with his front teeth showing: “Did you really get naked just to show me this?” he asked as you looked down at him realizing how close he was to you.
“I wanted to see if someone would be disgusted” you whispered cupping your breasts to hide them feeling now very self conscious of being this near a boy.
“No, dont do that” he said putting his hands up to pull your arms down: “You are beautiful” he whispered in a raspy note. You swallowed down the lump in your throat as you took a step closer letting him touch your thighs.
“So you think a guy would wanna be with me?” you swallowed and looked down at him as he still was looking up at you: “I dont know about other guys, but I would wanna be with you”
The confession made you slightly uncomfortable and took you by suprise at how honest he was about wanting you. “I’m sorry” he said looking apologetic, with his hands still rubbing up and down the sides of your naked thighs.
“No, I just see you at school and you dont seem like you want anything with anyone” you say clearing your throat and not expecting this what-seemed-to-be an easy exchange of opinion to take such a turn. In hindsight you realized you should have thought this through more before asking him.
The expression on Andrew´s face changed from soft to sad as he shook his head and put his hands down in his lap; “I guess I’m just not good with people. I´ve already made you uncomfortable”
You picked your shirt back up from the floor and pressed it to your chest before sitting next to him. The mattress shifted slightly as he turned to you while you were pressing this small fabric to your body.
“You are the first girl that has trusted me with something like this” Andrew confessed and looked at you now reaching over to touch your hair that was resting on your cheek.
You smiled at the kind gesture as his fingers played with the strands of hair. “You are really pretty” he said under his breath.
The validation itself was enough to almost make you cry, but you held your tears in bravely as you looked down at your scarred thighs; “I know the feeling of being out of place too”.
Andrew gave you a soft smile and came a little closer as he put his leg up on the bed now fully facing you. “Dont worry, I got you” he said in a low voice "I got us".
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