Thoughts of Horror

Here we go, the world is spinning. when it stops, it's just beginning.

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10 Cloverfield Lane is as good as everyone says.

John Goodman is perfection.

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Reviews coming

Intruders, When Animals Dream, and a mini review of Contracted Phase 2

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Review of Creep (2014)

“ When a videographer answers a Craigslist ad for a one-day job in a remote mountain town, he finds his client is not at all what he initially seems. “ (IMDb)

Creep had been on my Netflix watchlist for a little while and I had just never had the urge to actually watch it.  When it popped up on a list from Buzzfeed of “The Best 19 Horror Films of 2015″, I figured I might as well try it out.

Nonspoiler review above the cut. Top 3 creepy moments below it.

There’s a lot of jumpscares here.  In fact, it’s pretty much all jumpscares.  There are a few genuinely creepy moments (there’s just something so wrong about that wolf mask) and some really interesting ideas going on, ultimately, Creep doesn’t bring anything new to the table and runs pretty standard.  If the premise intrigues you, give it a watch, but you aren’t really missing anything if you skip it.

So, genuinely creepy moments for me:

1. Fucking tubby time.  There was nothing about that that was ok to me.  It hit something in my gut and I had a visceral reaction to it.

2. The wolf mask.  When he’s standing in front of the door with his arms out and those dead eyes are just staring at you--that is going to be the image that stays with me from the movie.

3. Even though it’s required for these types of movies--the phone call reveal.  Figuring out that he didn’t have a wife (it’s his sister) and that she was just so calm and matter of fact telling him to get out of the house...it was one of the better reveals I’ve seen.

In the end though, it really was more just a movie of a man jumping out of places and screaming than it was actually terrifying.

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In the spirit of Halloween and the fact that I haven’t been good about posting lately, here’s a list of some must-see horror.

1. Martyrs--if you like New French Extreme, this is a must-see.  It is honestly one of my very favorite movies and is one I can talk about for hours.  Plus, My Neighborhood (a beautiful piano piece) is in it...what more could you want from a horror movie?

2. The Woman--A movie with a couple possible different layers (straight revenge movie (eventually), a critique on the history of feminism, whatever you choose to believe), I am just always a fan of female revenge movies.  And Pollyanna McIntosh is perfection in her role of The Woman.

3. The Poughkeepsie Tapes--I don’t know what it is about this movie that is so hard for me, but there are some moments when I genuinely have to look away.  It can be a little hard to find, but it is so, so worth it.

4. Digging Up the Marrow--it’s fun and Ray Wise is always magic.  Plus, what horror fan hasn’t daydreamed about what it would be like if monster were real?

5. Excision-- AnnaLynne McCord and Traci Lords  steal the show as main character Pauline and her mother, respectively.  It’s a movie that is so wrong, it’s right.

6. The Bay--As a Maryland girl, how am I not going to love a horror movie that takes place on the Chesapeake Bay? A cool concept, great visuals, and a basis in reality (look up the parasite it’s based on, that eats fish tongues).

7. Yellowbrickroad--I forget about this movie, but every time I remember it, I remember how much I like it.  Its strength comes from audio and the acting in the second half of the film.

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Review of Starry Eyes

“ A hopeful young starlet uncovers the ominous origins of the Hollywood elite and enters into a deadly agreement in exchange for fame and fortune.”--summary from imdb.com

I was a little wary of Starry Eyes at first glance.  The summary didn’t really grab me, but once it started showing up on a couple lists as a movie to watch, I figured “Why not?”.  I was pleasantly surprised at how much I enjoyed it.

One trigger warning I will give is for trichotillomania.  It’s central to the plot and very explicit in its depiction, so if that’s triggering for you, I don’t know that this is the best film for you.

Starry Eyes reminded me of of Contracted, which is not a bad thing at all.  Both feature attractive young women undergoing an extreme physical change.  I was impressed with the makeup and especially Alexandra Essoe.  She was so good at making me feel for Sarah and understand her actions.  The very end was a little....overdone, but not necessarily bad.

In short: a well done body horror film that also horrifies with its look into the dark side of Hollywood and what it takes to be famous.  Well worth a watch.  It is currently on Netflix, so check it out!

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Human Centipede 3

The final installment of the Human Centipede franchise consists of an insane prison warden, his HC-obsessed accountant, a pointless secretary, and a cameo by Mr. Tom Six himself.

HC3 is meant to be a parody, with the tag line “100% politically incorrect”.  And it certainly is...but not in a clever or entertaining way.

Honestly, I watched it.  And I had forgotten that I had this sitting in my drafts.

Most of the performances were over-the-top, but to the point of just being bad.  Bree Olson has literally no purpose besides being continuously sexually assaulted.  There is a castration scene where we watch the actual testicles come out.  And then the warden eats them.  And the whole time, I was just kind of thinking “Eh”.  There was a lack of any real substance, but it also wasn’t just fun and meaningless, like other movies I’ve seen that lack substance.

If you’ve seen the other HC films, maybe you would want to see this, but it really isn’t worth it.  It’s already slipped out of my mind.

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Guys, I watched Human Centipede 3

I’m gonna do a review, but...I’m just disappointed.

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Review of In the Mouth of Madness

Looking at HBO Go, I saw this pop up and since I love Sam Neill and Lovecraftian horror, I knew I had to give it a go.

We open with some of the most 90′s sounding music that has ever been written.  Sutter Cane, a famous horror writer, has disappeared.  Sam Neill is an insurance investigator, who busts fradulent claims.

Sam Neill is brought into a mental hospital, shouting that he’s not crazy.  Skip to a little while later, he’s drawing crosses all over the walls and himself, when a doctor comes and asks how he ended up here.  And thus our story begins.

This is Lovecraftian horror at its finest.  Body horror, tentacles galore, talk of the Old Ones.  The same kind of practical effects that were used in The Thing (one of my favorites) are prevalent, which I always love.

One negative is that the sound can be uneven.  Whenever there’s anything going on, it gets oddly loud, so I had to do frequent adjusting.

Does it look a little dated at times?  Yes.  Did it hold my attention?  Definitely.  Is it worth a watch?  Totally.

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Review of V/H/S Viral

I honestly forgot that I had watched this.  So that should tell you something.

I like the anthology trend.  And the V/H/S series has been decent overall.  Some good, some meh,

So Viral.  3rd in the series.  The wrap around video is all about a teenager and a high speed chase and a kidnapped girlfriend.  Frankly, I was pretty underwhelmed by it.

Dante the Great: Meh.  That’s really the only reaction I had.

Parallel Monsters: Honestly, this was the best film.  It’s in Spanish and I don’t want to say too much about it.  It involves a man who has invented a machine that opens the door to parallel dimensions, where he meets his parallel self.  And then they decide to explore each other’s universes.

Bonestorm: Skateboarding, Mexico, and gore.  The story isn’t the strongest, but the makeup is pretty cool.

If you’re a fan of the series, you’ll watch it.  If you’re looking for one of them to just jump into, I would definitely recommend going with the 2nd (which I think is the strongest out of the 3).  I probably won’t watch it again, but I’m committed to the series, so I pretty much had to.

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Storage 24 was pretty bad (a very mini-review)

The alien looked ok occasionally, but there was some really rough looking design.

I would say it’s not even worth a watch.  It’s not....awful, it’s just boring.  Like, I could do a longer review, but it would just be boring.

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Tried to watch The House at the End of Time, but Netflix lost my place and I really just cannot be bothered to re-watch up to where I was

So now I’m watching Storage 24 instead.

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Review of The ABCs of Death 2

While scrolling through Netflix last night, I was excited to see that ABCs of Death 2 had been added.  My opinion of the first was that when it was good, it was really good, but when it was bad, it was horrid.  Luckily the second was leaps and bounds ahead of the first.

The good: D, J, T, V, X, Z

I think my favorite film was T, directed by the Soska sisters (American Mary).  Second favorite would be D because it was legitimately disturbing to me (bonus points for stop motion animation).

Honorable mentions: B, G, K, N, O, R, Y

The bad: F, P, U

F wasn't necessarily a bad movie, but I didn't really see any horror in it.  P was...meh.  I would say it was one of the weakest, but it did have a clear concept.  U wasn't bad, just boring and predictable.

Even if you didn't like the first one, I think this one is worth watching.  There's a lot of good ideas going on, some interesting cinematography, and it's just plain entertaining for the most part.

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Writing up a review for ABCs of Death 2

http://thoughtsofhorror.tumblr.com/post/42336110383/review-of-the-abcs-of-death-tw-for-animal-abuse

There's my review for the first one if you need a refresher.

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Review of Housebound

Housebound is a horror movie out of New Zealand from 2014.  Or actually, it's more of a horror comedy with some thriller elements thrown in.  I don't want to say too much, so I'll just put in the summary from IMDb: "Kylie Bucknell is forced to return to the house she grew up in when the court places her on home detention. However, when she too becomes privy to unsettling whispers & strange bumps in the night, she begins to wonder whether she's inherited her overactive imagination, or if the house is in fact possessed by a hostile spirit who's less than happy about the new living arrangement"

I'm not one for horror comedies usually, but this had just the right balance of humor and horror.  Really, the humor doesn't come in full swing until the later part of the movie, and since I was invested in the story and characters, it made sense and actually made me laugh rather than take me out of it.

It's currently on Netflix.  It's definitely worth a watch; it's a little quirky, but you can tell that people had fun making it, and it's an entertaining ride.

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Review of The Babadook

One movie that is consistently on "Best of 2014 Horror Movies" is The Babadook.  When I originally saw the trailer, I was...less than enthused.  But after reading so much praise for it, I decided to give it a shot.  And I was not disappointed.

The movie revolves around a mother and her son.  The son's father was killed in a car accident that occurred while they were on their way to the hospital for the mother to give birth.  7 years later, it's obvious that the mother is not coping with the loss well and the son has behavioral issues.  Then an odd children's book suddenly appears on the bookshelf, and the babadook enters their lives.

One thing I have to agree with that everyone else says is that this movie is very good at building atmosphere and doesn't rely heavily on jump scares to bring the horror.  Honestly, the book was one of the most horrifying parts of the movie for me, and it's a freaking pop-up book.  

The child actor was...I can't tell if it's him or his character.  I think a little of both.  I got tired of him and his screaming pretty quickly.  

Visually, the movie works just so wonderfully with the subject matter and the changes that occur over the course of the movie are subtle and effective.

As for the ending?  I think I may need to have a rewatch.

For those who need it, there is some brief animal cruelty.  It occurs offscreen, but we can hear sounds from it.

If you haven't seen The Babadook yet, definitely give it a watch!

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I'm getting Excision and The Tunnel soon...

So reviews will go up for those. It's a crazy time at work, so I haven't had time for reviewing lately, but I'm hoping after next week things will calm down. Meanwhile, mini netflix recommendations: The Taking of Deborah Logan--pretty good, definitely give it a watch. Good use of noise. Mr. Jones--interesting ideas, a bit muddled, especially as you get closer to the end. Then the story just falls apart. But knowing that going in, still worth watching once. Just don't expect too much.

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The Seasoning House: A Review

So I just finished The Seasoning House.  If you haven't heard of it, it's a movie about a deaf/mute girl (who is named Angel by the head of the house) who works in a house filled with kidnapped girls who are forced into prostitution.  She crawls through the vent systems, shoots the girls up with heroin before they work, and crudely paints on blue eye shadow and red lipstick.  She has it much better than the other girls, which isn't saying much.  We watch her go through this routine with dead eyes and a sense of resignation; that there is nothing she can do to change what has become her life.

Until a girl comes who can sign.  Suddenly Angel seems like a real person again, sneaking out of her room to spend time with her and offering her chocolate.  But then a new group of visitors arrive, the commander of which was there when Angel was kidnapped and was the one who gave the order to kill her mother.

No real spoilers above the cut review: worth a watch.  It has a real sense of reality in the look of the movie and Rosie Day is fabulous in the lead roll.  There's a scene towards the end of the movie (which I wish had been the actual end) that is flawless.  Be warned though--as you can guess from the subject matter, there is graphic sexual assault and violence against women, as well as plenty of gore.

The sickly green and yellow lighting, which highlights the blood and bruises on the other girls and picks up the dismal tone of the film

Rosie Day in the pipe at the end--beautiful and poignant.  I sincerely wish that the movie had ended here.

The bad:

The pig house and Ivan's wife

The actual end...I didn't care for the doctor twist.  I actually have a hard time believing that a) those people lived so close to this place and b) that they would choose a house close enough to other people that you could run there (granted, it was a little while, but not long enough).  Wouldn't there be the concern of sound carrying?

And finally, this may be my own fault, but Netflix recommended it to me based on the fact that I've watched The Woman.  Quickly looking through the reviews, they mentioned that it was a revenge flick, so I went into it with that mindset.  The Seasoning House is really not necessarily a revenge movie, or at least not one in the same vein as The Woman or I Spit on Your Grave.