I am aromantic/asexual please do not come into my DM's with the intent of a relationship thx <3
Hi! I am a hermit who has far far too many fandoms and interests to possibly have a healthy state of mind! Yay! I am now making it the endless voids problem :3
from now on i'll title all my own personal long posts about random non fandom related stuff with Holy Yap and #holy yapmaxxing so y'all can block it/skim past it if u want!
Benefits of having a bad day (or week) (or month) (or... well you get the point) is SOMETIMES like a randomly triggered game event, it unlocks a new character I couldn't previously write. Like I'll be having a moment of doom and despair and suddenly it clicks in my head like OH! THAT'S how they feel and think... aha.... and then i get to go torment that character with doom and despair :)))
if your animal is lying on the floor, furniture etc, it’s important to take a picture of them. then, if they move or shift in any way, it’s important to take another picture. with this technique, you can take many pictures of your animal
Don't know too many, but probably the TOS Science uniform :) it's a nice shade of blue. Honorary mention to that really deep cut green shirt Kirk sometimes wears.
Okay so! This took me a while to get around too sorry 😔 My memory was rusty, so I went through the episode summaries to trigger my memory and remember the titles XD that took me... a while... Anyhow! I have my final list but I'm doing 2 per season and a couple of honorable mentions :) some of these may be controversial but I'll do my best to explain my reasoning. This is really long so I'll put a spoiler:
Season 1:
This Side of Paradise (S1, Ep 24):
I found this to be really fun and interesting to watch. Not only did McCoy have some great lines, but J really enjoyed Kirk and Spock's dynamics. I thought the bit where Kirk had to incite Spock to fight him was really a nail biting tension filled scene, and I enjoy most of the episodes of Star Trek where the crew comes under the influence of some sort of extra terrestial drug or effect. I also found Spock falling in "love" with Kalomi to be beautifully disturbing, the contrast with his usual personality done really well.
The City on the Edge of Forever (S1, Ep 28):
I thought this episode had a lot of fun moments. Not only was it rare moment where McCoy completely messes things up, but the dynamic between Spock and Kirk was once again great. They had a lot of fun moments, and I love Spock's beanie 🤭. While I found the romance with Edith to be maybe slightly contrived, the ending was genuinely a bit heartbreaking. It was a great mix of rom com, tragedy, and one of TOS's really good back to the past/AU eps.
Season 2:
Amok Time (S2 Ep 1):
*Coughs* uhm well. I mean *handwaves* I think most TOS fans think this is one of the best eps in the series and I agree. Angry Spock was a joy to behold, Kirk and Spock's fight is the definition of camp, and even though I knew that SOMETHING would happen that lead Kirk to survive, the ploy took me by suprise, just as it took Spock by suprise. Plus Spock's smile at the end lives rent free in my head :)
Journey to Babel ( S2 Ep 10) :
I really enjoyed the variety of alien species in this episode, and the introduction of Sarek and Amanda was awesome. Watching Spock interact with his parents especially around Kirk was fun. There was a lot of tension in their dynamics which was interesting. The conflict between duty (and Kirk) and family was really good as well.
Season 3 (This was actually the hardest season to pin down my fav eps for but...) :
Wink of an Eye ( S3 Ep 11):
IDK it might not be like a cult favourite? But I enjoyed this episode, because I like the trope of a person not being able to interact with their loved ones, even when they are right there. Deela is kind of scary, I found their ""relationship"" and manipulations to be very tension inducing, and I liked the fact that Spock came to the rescue XD
All Our Yesterdays ( S3 Ep 23):
The tension between Spock and McCoy was brilliant. It's terrifying when someone you thought was your friend turns on you and McCoy def gets that and then some. Also Sick McCoy <3 Once again love the character fracturing that comes with Spock falling in love with someone. It never forgets to just be that little bit disturbing.
Honorable Mentions:
The Naked Time (S1 Ep 4):
.... Sulu with a rapier. What else do I need to say?
The Trouble with Tribbles ( S2 Ep 15):
I mean.... what can I say.... 😐 I had an absolute hoot watching this episode, the Tribbles were adorable and Kirk was perhaps at the utter lowest point of his life <3
These next three are all from Season 3. It had a lot of wild episodes, probably because the producers knew their time was gonna end soon, so they cut a bit loose. As such, all three are honorable mentions for how well they disturbed me (positive).
The Paradise Syndrome (S3 Ep 3):
This episode had stuff I did and didn't like. I generally wasn't a fan of the mild undertone of colonialism/white savior complex. It wasn't strong but it was definitely mildly present, though perhaps typical of the time. However, Spock's desperation to save not only Kirk but the planet as a whole was wonderful, and it was quite a nail biter.
Plato's Stepchildren (S3 Ep 10):
Well I feel like this is an episode people either hate or love. I'm both. I was stuck swinging between cringing and laughing the whole episode. It was remarkably disturbing watching Kirk and Spock be jerked around, but the fact that the show was able to *make* it genuinely disturbing is what makes it an honorable mention. It was also still mildly funny, and had bits I loved like Spock singing.
The Mark of Gideon (S3 Ep 16):
I actually hate this episode 😂 I hate it because it made me genuinely shudder at the overcrowding (I have a moderately strong case of touch aversion) and the whole virus carrier thing was pretty terrible for Kirk. But I was really impressed how they conveyed the horror of what was going on with relative ease.
AU idea where the writers remembered how Arthur saved a magical child in s1 (Mordred) despite his upbringing and Arthur creates a secret underground society to combat the persecution of magic, and Morgana does the same and... neither of them tell the other and they, their societies and Merlin all run around every episode, with the societies getting up to shenanigans and Merlin being more tired than ever trying to manage them all and save their arses
And meanwhile, Arthur and Morgana keep trying to find out who Emerys is, and Merlin doesn't tell them not because he doesn't trust them, but because whenever he does try to tell them something happens and then he decides maybe he can help them better if no one knows.
Ive been good omen pilling so hard i went to sleep and dreamt up a whole entire addition subplot to add to my good omens fic +additional background lore. Im cooked except i can only remember some of it now 🤣 Might end up having to make a seperate fic about it because it was so good 😔
In the newest wave of tumblr ad fuckery, a strange animal gif advert thing keeps crashing my tumblr dashboard to the point I can't even report the ads.
The problem with the (Good omens) finale isn't JUST that they replace all of the humans of earth with new ones (spoiler for spoilers)
but they also straight up killed *20 million* angels and demons who are beings and people in their OWN RIGHT and who have free will, dreams and wishes *in their own right*
and sure it's implied that they too were reincarnated as humans but the cascade effects of all of those things cannot possibly create the same earth just without angels and demons as they try to play it off as being
Okay, more thoughts on why Aziraphale isn’t colder or less committed to the relationship than Crowley, because portraying Crowley as some sort of an injured party bothers me.
The thing is, I know where the tendency comes from - it’s easy to focus on Crowley’s way of showing affection (aka acts of service) more since it’s more visible at first sight, more obvious to an outsider. But some people tend to follow this fact with the conclusion that it’s therefore stronger than Aziraphale’s way of showing affection for some reason. And. I can’t help but think that it’s pretty unfair to Aziraphale’s struggles. Because he not only has different ways of showing affection than Crowley to begin with, but also is much more repressed and conflicted about their relationship than Crowley is. (And Crowley knows it! That’s the point, Crowley remembers Heaven, he was there once. He’s patient because he understands.)
Aziraphale’s way of showing affection is less visible for people on the outside and much more intimate. It’s easy to underestimate how hard it is to leave your comfort zone for someone, which is what he does all the time, because it’s less showy. But it’s not right. And if someone wants to feel sorry for Crowley for having to be patient then it only seems to be fair to also feel sorry for Aziraphale for being so torn between Crowley and Heaven. But that’s the best part - for both of them commitment to the relationship comes with a price, but they still choose to do it anyway. Over the years they really learned each other, even if Aziraphale won’t admit to it and instead will say “I am an angel, you are a demon”. He’s not stupid. They both understand each other’s language and know what certain things mean.
Someone on here (I’ll be damned if I remember where I read it, sorry) described their dynamic as Aziraphale inviting Crowley to invite him and it’s so accurate. That’s exactly what he does, not because he’s too lazy/reluctant/whatever to commit, but because he’s too conflicted with himself to make a direct move. But instead he lets Crowley know that if Crowley asks, he will say yes and it’s So Important. Because Aziraphale seems passive when in reality he makes a huge effort to dance around all his dilemmas. And the fact that Crowley doesn’t have those dilemmas doesn’t make them any more valid.
And let’s be honest. “It would destroy you”? The way he looks at Crowley in that car in 1967 and you can literally see how hard it was for him to bring Crowley something that could destroy him because he can’t imagine his life without Crowley in it? Those are really huge gestures but they’re quieter because the bigger parts of those gestures happened inside Aziraphale, if that phrasing makes sense. It’s all less obvious because it’s internal (and, I cannot stress this enough, Crowley knows it. His situation is not as tragic as some people paint it to be. He sees it all and chooses Aziraphale over and over, which in my opinion makes it all much more mature and #married). Aziraphale’s signs of affection are less about what others can see and more about what happens in his mind and heart, and how willing he is to step out of his comfort zone, and how willing he is to submit himself to even more internal conflict just to spend time with Crowley. And if you ask me, that’s a whole fucking lot of love right there.
Their relationship is difficult to quantify because it’s 6000 years old. They don’t need to guess anymore, they know each other, and the thing is, Crowley isn’t stupid. Tempting people is literally his job. But to be able to tempt people you have to be able to read people.
Crowley knows full well that Aziraphale wants to spend time with him. He knew that when Aziraphale chose to take part in the Arrangement. He knew that when Aziraphale gave him the Holy Water. When Azirphale didn’t abandon him after he delivered the Antichrist. When they drink and dine and meet up together. That’s Aziraphale’s language of love: time. He has a literal limitless supply.
Crowley even takes his glasses, his barrier to the world, off around Aziraphale. That does not indicate someone who’s insecure about their angel friend being scared off by reminders of their demonic essence. Crowley is absolutely not insecure in his relationship (however you define it) with Aziraphale.
What we see on screen with the ‘we can run away together’ and trying to go to Alpha Centauri is not insecurity that Aziraphale doesn’t love him, it’s sheer panic that they have to act now and if they don’t they are going to die along with the whole of Earth because he fucked up.
That’s not an ‘I’m scared he doesn’t love me’ reaction, that’s a ‘we are going to die and need to get away now’ reaction. Crowley is terrified, [and to be honest, if I’d just double-crossed and lied to Satan’s face for eleven years, I’d be pretty scared too], and all he’s thinking is ‘we need to go.’
Aziraphale is digging his heels in, but that’s not because he doesn’t love him, that’s because everything’s moving too fast, Heaven’s changing and he doesn’t know how to fool the new Heaven, and Crowley - ironically the most stable and unchanging of the two in this sense - is also shifting annd changing all over the place - and he doesn’t know how to make them work together anymore, so hides.
There were probably times over the 6,000 years of their relationship where Crowley felt the pain of Aziraphale holding back. Times when he wanted so badly to march up and do something so that Aziraphale would be forced to reciprocate or make his feelings plain; Times when he wanted to storm off and never see the angel again because he was so stupid and stubborn. Times he probably shouted into his pillow that he hated Aziraphale even though he knew the opposite was true.
But the thing is, whatever pain he felt, he worked through it a long time ago. Every plan to force the issue, he abandoned because he knew it wasn’t right. Every argument, even the big one in the 1860s, they eventually made their peace and moved forward.
By the time we get to the present, this isn’t a bitter, lost Crowley wounded by Aziraphale’s reluctance. This is the loving, patient Crowley who knows what he feels, and is ready to meet Aziraphale on whatever terms the angel needs to be comfortable.
Crowley’s peace with it all, his patience, is so absolutely clear in his reaction to the “get three behind me foul fiend!” comment.
He isn’t hurt, or angry or surprised. There’s no sting to it. There’s a weariness there (oh this shit again *yawn*) but also an amusement (oh this shit again.. ha! You are cute when you lie, angel- you really think you believe this shit don’t you? You silly thing…). He’s just rolling with the punches and seems content to keep doing so until Aziraphale works it through.
He only stops rolling with the punches when Armageddon looms and they are out of time. I think so many struggle to understand pre-Armageddon Crowley’s patience and peace because as humans we are always out of time. Death, the ultimate deadline, hangs above our heads. And death means that there’s a ticking clock on all of our other life goals. Want to buy a nice cottage in South Downs with your soul mate one day? Or travel the world together? Or open a joint bookshop? Well, tick tock… Better find and secure them fast enough to have time for all of that. Plus, for many humans love comes with the ticking clock of fertility. If you do want children and you want to have those children with your soul mate you have what a decade and a half or so from coming of age to find and secure said soul mate or risk the children thing not happening? How insane is that? No wonder we can’t imagine patiently keeping “I love you” unsaid while our soul mate works out their shit. But….until Amageddon creates a ticking clock Crowley has all the time in the world to be slow and patient and to be at peace with that, to actually enjoy the slow dance. And I think, moments of frustration and insecurity aside, he does enjoy the slow dance with Aziraphale. He is savouring it.
And that’s the difference between a normal, human slow burn and the Ineffable 6,000 Year Slow Burn.
The regrets, the ticking clock on human relationships, comes from the possibility of missed opportunities. How many of those can you truly say there are when both parties are immortal?
There will always be another sunset to watch together, another restaurant to dine at. There will be more ducks to feed.
It does make you wonder what the real regrets would be. Things like, “I wish we could have shared the view from the walls of Troy.”
Idk. I should probably stop before I come up with six more ideas for stories. 😆
A companion to Owls frustrates me so bad in Good Omens Season 2. Spoilers and mild rant under cut
It's one of the most beautiful subplots/scenes/stories in the entire show. It perfectly portrays so many of the themes in the Book. It's an extremely convincing start to a book canonical Arrangement, and a book canonical true start of the Crowley and Aziraphale's friendship. It OOZES everything i adore about the book, and the scene of Aziraphale eating food for the first time is well... one of my favourite scenes in the show XD it's heartbreaking in parts and wondrous in others and perfectly shows off a capricious God without it being overtly villainous. I love everything about it.
AND YET? It COMPLETELY contradicts the show itself and none of the threads it sends out are ever picked back up. It hints at a really interesting potential ending for Azi, one where he finally stops going along with heaven, but thats never picked up again. The only thing that vaguely is connected is God and Satan's bet/relationship thing. It also contradicts the previous hemming and hawing of TV! Azi on their relationship/arrangement, because Owl! Azi is everything that book Azi is and more, and is pretty gung ho about the arrangement being a possibility.
it just FRUSTRATES ME GRRRR why give us something so thematically beautiful that combines the best bits of the show and the book and have it be a complete floater of a thing??
I think it's so funny how we bred JOBS into dogs. I have two shih tzus and they were bred to be lap dogs. All they care about is looking cute and cuddling with people. Meanwhile my grandma has a border collie and that dog needs to feel so useful all the time, he acts like he will pass away if he doesn't have a job to do constantly
On one hand this is extremely fucking funny, but on the other hand, it really boggles my mind how many people punish their dogs for just… doing the thing they were bred to do.
Your husky isn’t “hyperactive”, it’s bred to pull sleds for 8 hours straight and you have it in a 400 sq ft yard.
Your English sheepdog isn’t “pushy”, it’s bred to herd sheep, and you have neither to space nor the herd to allow it.
Your terrier isn’t “nippy”, it’s bred to kill rats and your hamster looks a hell of a lot like one.
Your Catahoula isn’t “mean to animals”, it’s bred to hunt any and all animals smaller than it, and you didn’t acclimate it to your cat.
Your Lhasa Apso isn’t “yappy”, it’s bred to bark at any tiny noise and alert watchmen to intruders
Like Jesus Christ, if you can’t provide an environment where your dog can’t fulfill its literal life purpose, maybe?? Don’t get that dog??? And if you do, maybe know the breed characteristics so you can redirect those traits into more constructive outlets????
Both your most common doodle's parts (labra and golden) want to hunt and retrieve water birds so the best suggestion I can give y'all is congratulations on your new duck hunting hobby.
Any time someone sees Herschel and says "AWWW I want a Corgi <3" (because he is Very Cute (TM)), I immediately reply:
"Do not get a Corgi unless you have a job for it to do. They were bred to bully livestock across the hills of Wales. This is basically a Border Collie that knows he is cute enough to get away with murder. If you get one and it doesn't have a job, it will apply its livestock-bullying instincts to YOU. Herschel's job specifically is to help manage my crippling ADHD, because I don't have a bull for him to micromanage."
This gets me odd looks at the home depot but it does get the point across.
Someone mentioned how they were having a hard time creating a world for their fantasy fiction geographically because they kept reinventing the island of Britain, which also happened to my good close enemy George R. R. Martin. I would like to suggest North Carolina. I know that sounds absolutely ridiculous but North Carolina has an awesome geographic setup for a fantasy kingdom, I think. Inhospitable barrier islands, constantly shifting shoals in the sound, swamps with alligators, venomous snakes and carnivorous plants, lots of very flat and somewhat sparsely populated farmland, foothills, mines, mountains full of mysterious phenomenon that were originally very difficult to navigate and people still get lost in today. It kind of rocks.
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