right thing to do 🫡

jes | 30s | used to be a hockey rpf blog and then this happened to me | hockey content now at @ticklefightgeno | saysthemagpie on ao3

[citrusses]

PSA tho everyone if anyone ever pulls the shit on you that Ilya pulls on Shane in ep 2 you need to delete that persons number from your phone and maybe change your last name so that toxic loser can’t ever find you again. Not u tho Shane baby, keep pining! I think he’s the one!!!!

[ticklefighthockey]

read some great fic this weekend… revisited an old favorite in the biblical sense… had big feelings about omega shane in pencil in the rest… got my heart smashed into a million pieces by second, third, and hundredth chances… shrieked with delight over clean sweep… and thoroughly enjoyed contemplating the improbable but compelling pairing of shane/sasha in gens du pays

[ticklefighthockey]

got my heart smashed into a million pieces AGAIN in a different way by dawn in the altered world which I am still thinking about

[parcai]

fixed it.

[ticklefighthockey]

sidgeno has jen from PR who is a beloved and important minor character in many fics… HR needs some of these front office or equipment team people to fill out the ensemble cast in fic. like who has shane’s back in the front office and gives him all the gossip. whose job is ilya regularly making harder but he’s so roguishly charming they just roll their eyes and let him get away with it

[top-cheese]

All Great Soccer Players Are Poets by Duy Doan

[ticklefighthockey]

I’ll never know who slayyyter is and there’s a real peace in accepting that

[cuppydogshane]

the amount of people that are like

(looks at ilyas constructed persona that he puts on to avoid intimacy) AWESOME THIS IS HIS TRUE CHARACTER

is certainly something

[ticklefighthockey]

found this hilarious list I made when I was super stuck in a draft a few years ago. I sound like an alien taking notes for an anthropological study of humans. swallow pills with or without water

[ticklefighthockey]

I’m still feeling so sad about the apocalypse and it didn’t even happen!!!! it was a work of fiction!!!!!

[pemguims]

sends an offersheet to my neighbours wife

[ticklefighthockey]

just when you think there’s nothing new under the sun to say about heated rivalry someone invents skip divorce

[ticklefighthockey]

I’m still sobbing about [spoilers for that apocalypse fic]

all the raiders losing their kids 😭😭😭 ilya losing svetlana and knowing that even if she’s alive he’ll never, ever speak to her or see her again or even know that she survived 😭😭😭 and most of all shane waiting for his parents for two years at the cottage telling himself they were coming they could still be coming he just needed to wait a little while longer because what if he left and they missed each other and they were never able to find each other again 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[ticklefighthockey]

skip divorce where for various reasons scott hunter ends up crashing on shane and ilya’s couch after the public intoxication charges… on the couch because ilya won’t let him sleep in the guest room (he wants to turn him out of the house) and this was their compromise. he and shane keep having whispered fights about it in the kitchen while scott is morosely watching tv in the living room with the volume on full blast while secretly nipping whiskey out of a flask he’s been cunningly concealing between the couch cushions. shane is like he’s a fucking mess ilya, it’s actually embarrassing and pretty bad PR like he’s kind of making all gay hockey players look bad, isn’t it better to let him stay for a few days out of the public eye, and ilya is like that prehistoric barely alive intoxicated dinosaur is going to try to FUCK my beautiful HUSBAND I’ve already SEEN him making sad wet eyes at you hoping you’ll find him pathetic enough to hook up with, and shane is like oh my god ilya don’t be ridiculous he just got divorced he doesn’t want to have sex with me!!!!, and scott hunter who just lurched into the kitchen unheard behind them and is a flask and a half deep at this point is like soooo [hiccup] what’s up with you guys anyway. like is your marriage basically open or— and then ilya tries to kill him.

[hudconvent]

thinking kip uses scotts hockey money and influence to become curator of a really successful art gallery and has a very glowing profile in new york magazine or something. hes pretty well known among the well connected new york crowd and scott hunter obviously a public name so their divorce really makes waves. kip being so classy about it and is making no public comments except for a “please respect our privacy at this time” . meanwhile scott is on instagram posting the most cryptic messages over a black background and is spending a lot of time in the hamptons and a carousel of young twinks are seen coming and going all hours of the day from his westhampton rental and he probably catches a dui or public intoxication charge. the mugshot is really funny and ilya makes it his profile picture for 4 hours before yuna tells him its not tasteful and makes him change it back

[ticklefighthockey]

do u think there is a world where shane has given himself concussion tests as a benchmark for deciding if he is too drunk and should switch to water on a night out

no because I don’t think he drinks haha. now has he given ilya those tests? perhaps

[ticklefighthockey]

i’m back with another hockey question. when ilya and shane start playing on the same team do you think their yearly point/goal totals would go down compared to when they were on separate teams? my thinking being that they probably were scoring the most in their old respective teams, but now they have to share the goals more? like unless they’re just churning out like six goals a game all the time.

well Reid has them scoring dick tricks all the time lol so maybe that pace is hard to maintain. but no there are at least a handful of teams where there are two superstar forwards who are usually neck and neck in the scoring race. see for instance mcdavid and draisaitl now or sid and geno in their prime. they are probably both playing 20-22 min a night max and there’s no reason they couldn’t both have their full 20 min in which to score

[ticklefighthockey]

Do you think Sid is good at snuggling or is he just one big steak

is steak a slang term or do you just mean is he one big piece of meat