sorry if i come off as rude my mother didn't like me for several years
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@tifosisufferer
sorry if i come off as rude my mother didn't like me for several years
there's nothing like rawdogging an undiagnosed mental illness on report card day
is Kimi Antonelli a terror and the worst fucking menace to exist on our current grid? yes. do I stand with him like he is my son? yes. come at my child and I will fucking end you.
I could lowkey write an essay on why I'd survive a horror movie
if I get one more minor inconvenience, they will have to lock me away for their own safety
I am the physical embodiment of a long suffering sigh
thinking about Lance Stroll hitting a wall and then all hell breaks loose. Stroll what kind of witchcraft were you doing in Monaco. Stop this madness.
I think we should allow Charles Leclerc to go batshit insane on the track
I have no words about Charles' brake failure (other than fuck you Ferrari), but Charles has plenty. fuck 'em up Charles.
Hey Monaco what the actual fuck happened there.
My (unfiltered) opinion on the '26 F1 grid even though nobody asked as someone who joined F1 just last year:
I'm going from those who I know least to those who I know best. My favorites are going to be ten-point essays.
Fernando Alonso: the youngest rookie on the grid and secretly the goat. I love him.
Lance Stroll: drives like a grandma taking a stroll. get it together man.
Valtteri Bottas: I honestly know nothing about him. Sick mustache tho.
Checo Perez: Also Sergio Perez. Very confusing.
Nico Hulkenburg: He's a dilf, not gonna lie.
Gabrielo Bortello: Idk even know if I spelled his name right. Into older men according to fans??? (#gabico)
Estaban Ocon: Estie Bestie here has a habit of erasing his teammates from the face of the earth. I hope Ollie's safe. Anyway, I've heard some things about him, but he seems cool.
Ollie Bearman: Dude how could you not love Ollie Bearman. one of the most cinnamon roll people to ever exist. Honestly a great driver, it's too bad he's stuck in that fuckass Haas.
Alex Albon: Easily the sweetest and most whimsical person to ever exist. Where did we find this gem of a man. we need more people like him, where is the source. His blonde era was cunty and iconic. I love him. George loves him. We all love him.
Carlos Sainz: TRAGEDY THAT HE'S IN A WILLAMS. He was doing so good in Ferrari, dammit. He was a good teammate and a good driver, really on par with Charles. He managed to drag that piece of shit Ferrari up the positions and make it something, how dare they sack him. Honestly wish him the best and only the best.
Liam Lawson: I actually don't know a lot so idk why he's this far up this list. He seems like he's fighting to keep his career in VCARB but he damn near erased Pierre Gasly from the planet so I don't know how that's going for him.
Arvid Linblad: ????? he's only this far in the list bc i like putting the teammates together. Idk anything about him. seems chill.
Okay now to get to the ones I've been waiting for...
Lando Norris: *sigh*. Listen, he has amazing potential. He managed 2025 WDC (although I will argue that he was heavily favored by the team and therefore was given an unfair advantage against Oscar), and he seems to drive well enough. He has a tendency towards bottling, but hey, I can't even fucking drive so who am I to judge. I think his attitude and the way he interacts with other drivers could improve, if only for his own benefit. I think he has room to grow as a person, and I will give him grace, but he's also a grown ass man. I think that mental health is important, but I think he also has to realize that he can't please everybody, and he needs to find his own rhythm instead of adapting to comments from the media or other drivers.
Oscar Piastri: The goat. I genuinely believe that he has the potential to be back-to-back WDC if McLaren would give him a goddamn chance. I think if Oscar genuinely raced Lando without worrying about team rules (or his car fucking killing itself mid-race), then he could win. Oscar Piastri had starts blessed by God Himself, and I think that contributes to his precision and power as a river. He's got amazing talent that I think needs to be utilized a little selfishly. If I was Oscar, I would just go batshit insane and turn off the team radio. Also fuck you, Zack Brown.
Isack Hadjar: He's a good driver; I really think he's feeling the pressure of being a teammate to Max Vertsappen. The RB second seat is famously cursed, and that's gotta put some sort of toll on him. I think sometimes when he crashes, it's because he pushes with control. A few years of experience, keeping his head down and just continuing to race will do him some good. The fact that he managed a podium after that dumpster fire of a race in Monaco just speaks to his talent.
Lewis Hamilton: He is a seven-time world champion, but that was in Mercedes. I wonder how he'll do as he continues to race in the train wreck that is Scuderia Ferrari (my #1's unfortunately for me). Mercedes has a genuinely good work environment with a mostly consistent car and competent strategists, whereas Ferrari said, "fuck it, let's build our car from junkyard trash and hire our strategists from the streets". I think if he keeps up the work he's doing, it'll really attest to his talent as a driver. I'm not saying he's not talented, he managed to survive Nico Rosberg (physically, not mentally), so I'd say he's pretty damn great.
George Russel: I honestly can't blame him for his attitude this year. Imagine you've been driving for Mercedes for a while, and you're doing good. The first race of '26 and you've won, people are saying you're in line for WDC this year. Then your 19-year-old teammate absolutely blows you out of the fucking water, winning 5 times in a row. You're pressured to keep up with the Golden Child, the mini–Max Verstappen. Canada was your fortress, until this kid is hunting you down on the track like a fucking madman, and then your car starts to fail you. George Russel has every damn right to complain or be upset. It's a miracle he hasn't completely lost it, in my mind. He's a good driver and a good guy, but he's under enough pressure to crack a diamond. Did I mention that Mercedes fucked him over? Idk. Toto Wolff what the hell man.
I've saved the best (the longest) for last.
Max Verstappen: A legend. A generational legend. This man has been one of the greats since the goddamn beginning. He's known for his aggressive driving style and his unapologetic swag. The rookies view him the same way Catholics view Mother Mary. He is The Inevitable. A driver sees Max Verstappen in their rearview mirror and fights the urge to cry. Once he's five seconds behind you, it's not a matter of if but when he's going to pass you. He sees the car in front of him and hunts them down like a psychopath until he's past, and he'll get past them. He overtakes like the angel of death from Passover, and Charles Leclerc is the only one with lamb's blood on his door. Even his own team struggles to keep up with him. Second seat drivers who can't live up to him get sacked regularly. He's the very foundation of Red Bull. He was beaten down and ground to dust as a child only to rise up and be taller than the pinnacle of motorsport itself. He is unapologetically Max Verstappen, and no one is going to stop him.
Kimi Antonelli: Mercedes' Chosen One. The Golden Child. The Prodigy. Kimi Antonelli came in like a fulfilling of a long-forgotten prophecy. His rookie year was exactly that: a rookie year. He got second one time and then preceded to win 5 consecutive races. He was placed in a rocket ship of a car, sure, but his raw talent is what really made it fly. He wasn't even touched in dumpster fire Monaco, which was the true testing of his technical skill. He was able to put a lot of pressure on George in Canada and probably would've managed the overtake had George's car not failed. He is confident in his ability and more importantly, confident in his team. He trusts his engineers and strategists and teammate. Has the determination only a teenager can hold. He is not yet old and weary with experience and disappointment. He's soaring on a cloud of highs, and I bet he could soar on a cloud of lows too. He's genuinely in love with racing and right now, racing is loving him back.
Charles Leclerc: My favorite driver. I love him. The poetic symbolism alone is just the start. He is a saint. He is a martyr. Every time his team cuts him open, his heart bleeds Ferrari red and gold. It's the fact that after every failure, Charles still finds a way to hope. He's lost the light in his eyes, but he would still sell his soul for that Ferrari championship that's just out of reach. He's wrapped up in blood red glory that's really just an illusion, but he holds onto it in the name of his father. He holds onto it in the name of the dreams he had as a kid. Getting the WDC for Ferrari seems like a fool's errand to all but him, and the longer he chases it, the faster he gets. Charles is fundamentally human in the sense that he has sights set far beyond our capabilities, but he can get it. He will get it.
i am insane. i am wise. i am the voice of reason. i use no reasoning. i argued with God and lost. i would fight the ocean if i felt so inclined. i am not a human but rage personified.
Me: *gestures vaguely at the world* this is not okay.