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The Invitation- by Oriah Mountain Dreamer

Like many folks, I often find myself wide awake from 2-4am... Restless and searching for something to read that calms my restless soul.

Hard as I try to stay focused, clear and anchored I am sometimes needing a reminder that in spite of the world being in a state of chaos, there are quiet places that soothe my achy parts and breath life back into me again.

This poem was shared with me by my daughter, posted on this blog some time back. It took my breath away. And calmed my soul.

Enjoy.

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing. It doesn't interest me how old you are I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love for your dreams for the adventure of being alive. It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon... I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shrivelled and closed from fear of further pain. I want to know if you can sit with pain mine or your own without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it. I want to know if you can be with joy mine or your own if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful be realistic to remember the limitations of being human. It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself.

If you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. If you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see Beauty even when it is not pretty every day. And if you can source your own life from its presence. I want to know if you can live with failure yours and mine and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, "Yes." It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after a night of grief and despair weary and bruised to the bone and do what needs to be done to feed the children. It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back. It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

Freedom

On this very American holiday I'm particularly drawn to the notion of independence and what it means to be 'free.' I think a lot about the concept of freedom these days, versus entrapment both real and imagined.

I love being around young and inspired twentysomethings who don't yet buy in to the myth that the world is against them. I love the big dreams and attachment to purpose over attachment to things. The belief that anything is possible.

To be free is to know that the life we're living is the one we created because we own our choices. In my case, that we can live a contributable life even if it goes against what others think we should be doing with our career.

I love the story of my own mother who after 50 tumultuous years with the same man, decided to begin a new chapter, graduating from college at 68 yrs old summa cum laude with a degree in new media, then traveled to Africa with me at 73 and at 75 yrs old, is now working on her 2nd documentary.

I love the story of a woman who, after 6 horrific years of capture by rebels in the Congo and enduring unspeakable horrors, escaped and is now studying law and pursuing women's rights thanks to Let Africa Live, a grassroots organization supported by Eastern Congo Initiative, the nonprofit founded by Ben Affleck.

I'm saddened by the story of a trust fund friend who is convinced he should have 'gotten more' of the family fortune and lives in a constant state of lack and limitation. All the money in the world won't create freedom for this one.

I am constantly reminding myself that life will bring obstacles, challenges will never cease to exist and sometimes my best laid plans work out differently than anticipated.

BUT, I am always free to make new choices. And that, is the independence that I celebrate on this holiday.

#freedom independence choice new chapter second lifer new start

Lifters and Leaners

I've been thinking about how there are basically two types of personalities- A 'lifter' and a 'leaner.' Lifters lean into things, throwing their weight behind a goal or purpose, never assuming it's someone else's job to do the heavy lifting for them, and know intuitively that it's ok to be a little uncomfortable most of the time. Leaners are quick to find the nearest chair, often finding amusement in the hurried (and sometimes harried) actions of the lifter, and are quick to criticize or make judgement calls on how something could be done differently. Leaners like to analyze to death, spending more time assessing risks than just getting off center point and seeing what will happen.

I'm a huge fan of Seth Godin (best selling author of books such as 'The Purple Cow' and recently, 'Linchpin'), who points out that we should learn how to 'sprint' more. A sprint is helpful when we need to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time, making leaning (or looking for the nearest chair) an impossibility.

Sprinting towards a big goal is a good way to avoid the 'analysis paralysis' effect of leaning. But there are downsides to the sprint. When you sprint you can assume that later, you may realize there WAS a better way to handle something, or maybe even cringe as you watch yourself learning something new on the fly.

I've been doing a lot of sprinting lately and find that it keeps me out of my critical self and requires me to be more instinctive and as a result, I have more flow. In fact, the more flow I have the less I care what people think and the less I care about what people think the more flow I have.

I recall my son hauling a very heavy pumpkin from the pumpkin patch all of the way to our parked car quite far away. At one point he started crying and saying how heavy the pumpkin was and that he wanted to stop carrying it. I told him that it was good practice to lift heavy things and for him to consider how disappointed he would be to get to the car without that special pumpkin he'd picked out. He fussed some more but kept stumbling along with his pumpkin until he finally reached the car, and then burst into tears with relief that he was done. All of the way home he kept saying how happy he was that he carried the pumpkin, grinning ear to ear.

It's temping to lean when we're in the middle of a sprint but keep sprinting anyway.

You can lean later.

The mother is you.

I have the immense pleasure of being a surrogate mother to 7 (sometimes more) young people, in addition to two of my own children. The GoodMakers Street Team 'tribe' is mostly camped out at my home, in their backyard tent rooms, on my couch, in my kitchen and pretty much everywhere.

This affords lots of ears on conversations that I wouldn't otherwise be privy to. In some ways these are usual 'twentysomethings' dealing with the same angst, dramas and pit falls particular to that age group. But in other ways, these are the most extraordinary young people imaginable, who motivate and inspire me to no end.

These are young people who are doing things with their lives, who are putting their passion to good purpose. Not because it's making them rich (it's not), or famous (not yet). They're living a contributable life because they know it's our way forward. They are confronting this pivotal moment in our time with action.

They call me 'Mama T' and I humbly accept this title. I am grateful to share this life with them and thank the mothers who raised them to be such incredible global citizens. And for teaching them how to wash their own dishes, make their own beds and keep the music down to a reasonable level after midnight (mostly).

I thank my own mother for teaching me how to love and especially, how to learn more every day.

To the mothers of the GoodMakers Street Team- Happy Mother's Day from 'Mama T'.

The Invitation- Oriah Mountain Dreamer

This poem was shared with me by my daughter today. It took my breath away.

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing. It doesn't interest me how old you are I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love for your dreams for the adventure of being alive. It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon... I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shrivelled and closed from fear of further pain. I want to know if you can sit with pain mine or your own without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it. I want to know if you can be with joy mine or your own if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful be realistic to remember the limitations of being human. It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself.

If you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. If you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see Beauty even when it is not pretty every day. And if you can source your own life from its presence. I want to know if you can live with failure yours and mine and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, "Yes." It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after a night of grief and despair weary and bruised to the bone and do what needs to be done to feed the children. It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back. It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

GoodMakers Films Benefit Brunch at Salute Restaurant in Santa Monica, March 26th. We raised over $6000 for our charity projects!!

Staying awake

At 2:53am this seems the appropriate title for this post. Since we founded nonprofit GoodMakers Films nearly 2 years ago, I've had the experience of being wide awake at this hour far too many times. Finding your life purpose and being surrounded by vibrant, passionate twentysomething's who want to solve the world's problems, gives me a life force that no energy drink could ever come close to.

But waking up is hard.

Two years ago I was far from awake, working at an ad agency and immersed in work that I found less than thrilling. Ok, it was actually mind numbing much of the time although I enjoyed many of my clients. It was the work that seemed like such a poor use of me and I knew my days were numbered in the ad world. I was miserable but scared to let go because it meant I would need to be willing to remove my support from the things that no longer served me when I was asleep.

Sometimes waking up means giving up our stuff. Scary. We invest a lot of our time working for our stuff and all of that time and energy is what we tell ourselves is the reason we're not doing more important things like, spending time with our kids, doing meaningful work that makes a difference in the world and living into our potential.

Waking up is just the beginning of realizing that working for your stuff makes you a non-feeling, non-thinking, button pushing robot that is far from awake and means that we're missing everything that matters.

It's 3:09am and I'm thrilled to be awake.

#Salute #Julia Roth #GoodMakers Street Team #GoodMakers Films #Brunch #Benefit #gluton free

food4good-blog

tiloponder-blog

I was recently inspired by a post from one of the GoodMakers Street Team who at 15 years old, wrote one of those most clear minded, inspiring passages about women, our bodies and how we need to get over it. At 15. Julia's a ripe old 22 years now and even more wise and wonderful but seriously, having that kind of wisdom in your body at 15 reminded me of how much clarity I felt at 15. Yes, also confusion and insecurity but a deep knowingness of the universe that I have only recently reclaimed. Why do we spend the first 15 years of our life living on instinct and the next 30 years undoing that magic?

Here's to our 15 year old selves reborn. Let the magic begin again.

Thank you Julia. Here's the post:

food4good:

I found this rant from when I was in the 10th grade. And I thought this rush of passion came out of the blue!

“Who decided that I must be a better version of the person standing next to me?

I hugged myself the other day, breathing hard as to gently dislodge the rust crammed in between my...

Watch this now !

'I am not eccentric. It's just that I am more alive than most people. I am an unpopular electric eel set in a pond of goldfish.' - Dame Edith Sitwell

That quote has been on my refrigerator for many years, having survived two house moves, occasional refrigerator cleanings and one near catastrophe when the frayed paper tumbled from the fridge due to a tired magnet and saved in the last second from a deep dive into the dog's water bowl. Why so precious this piece of paper?

Because I need a reminder that I need to be the electric eel, not the gold fish.

The truth is, I have more often masqueraded as a gold fish. Tell me if this sounds familiar- You try to dumb yourself down, taking out all of the 'color' or 'flare' that makes you unique, and package yourself up as someone you're not because you are trying to make yourself fit in a box that is deemed 'viable, marketable or hirable.' I'm exhausted just recalling it.

An 'electric eel' often has a smaller social circle including avoiding collecting unnecessary Facebook friends. They're busy exploring the broader world around them, being who they are and content to be as they are. They don't mind if they're not part of what's popular and invariably set trends as a result, not that they care. Electric eels live by their instincts which often appears to be counter intuitive because they're usually swimming in the polar opposite direction of where the crowds are headed.

We all want to be electric eels but another part of us is fighting for the safety, comfort and predictability of the goldfish pond. After all, goldfish are widely accepted with a guarantee of being likable and non-threatening.

Note to self: Being likable is highly over rated. Ditto to non-threatening.

'When you come to a deep chasm in the road, jump. It's not as wide as you think.'

I can't recall the author of that quote but I love it. Especially during these times when we are all feeling like the most practical thing to do is to play it safe. But what if there's a part of you that has a hunch that maybe it's not smart to act small, fly under the radar.. play dead. What if there's a knot in your stomach because you have a hunch you're supposed to be taking risks, steering toward your dream that you talked yourself out of 20 years ago.

My son started his first day of kindergarden today. For my son, today was a chasm in the road. He was anxious and all summer he became more reticent about 'starting big boy school' because of all of the hype. He did not want to jump. The chasm seemed too wide, too deep and full of unknowns. As we walked toward his waiting classroom his steps slowed and he hesitated at the doorway. I bent down and whispered 'jump.' He looked up at me puzzled and I mimed a jumping motion and pointed at the classroom where kids were bustling about. He looked pained and then took a deep breath and jumped with brand new light-up Cars sneakers, landing squarely into the classroom.

It's not important how far we jump, only that we do. Relative to the distance we've come from, an inch might as well be a mile.

WHERE WOULD YOU MOST LIKE TO VISIT ON YOUR PLANET?

africa, again , forever

what I'm thinking

A man reserves his true and deepest love not for the species of woman in whose company he finds himself electrified and enkindled, but for that one in whose company he may feel tenderly drowsy.

'If you pray, move your feet.'

African tribe

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