non-euclidean fuck machine

(they/them) loud queer

[intactics]

ham and sneeze sandwich

[davidfosterwallaceandgromit]

[estrogenesis-vaporeongelion]

where to upgrade social battery. where to buy larger social battery. how to attach multiple social batteries. how to hang out with all your friends without getting tired. how to hang out with everyone you wanna hang out with without burning out. infinite social energy hack. nap tips

[estrogenesis-vaporeongelion]

social battery rapid charger. social battery usable while plugged in. how to love everyone you love

[fairycosmos]

look. i don’t think my stretch marks are beautiful. i don’t think they’re tiger stripes or natural tattooos. i don’t think my acne is beautiful. i don’t think the bags under my eyes are beautiful. i just think they’re human. and i don’t think i have to be beautiful all of the time in order to be accepted and loved and sucessful. i don’t think every small detail of my outer appearence needs to be translated into prettiness.

[serotonin-sunrise]

fun fact: this POV is actually called “body neutrality” and it’s SO MUCH more accessible/realistic for a lot of people. it’s based on the idea that the way we look is the least interesting/important thing about who we are, and that our bodies are worthy of respect regardless if they fit the mold of the current beauty ideals.

[depsidase]

[lanadelreyquasa]

WHAT IS THE FUCKING POINT

[kaibas-paragraphical-mind]

YOU COULD BE A FUCKING BADASS DRAGON THAT’S THE POINT

[who-the-f-ck]

“I AM A CREATURE OF DARKNESS” “oh hey sabrina.”

[shitsuren-chama]

I guess the point is that you could shapeshift into the body you always thought you’d grow into when you were a kid

taller, shorter, slimmer, more muscular, purple hair, tattoos everywhere, tattoos nowhere, 

every single shoe would fit you every single time you tried it on, every single article of clothing would fit your perfectly, all you have to do is transform slightly, you’d never run out of ‘your size’ again

and you wouldn’t have to work for it at all, and you’d never be limitted by your bone structure or something. You could just transform at will.

[elvenrainbow]

[bogleech]

I don’t see how this is much of a downside

When you turn into a sixty story tentacle demon and terrorize a city you want to get the credit you deserve

[revereche-deactivated20140508]

Oh man that would be so sweet. I could be an annoying fuck as an insect or something but you couldn’t kill me because everyone would know

[perpetualcombustioninstruct-blog]

That’s great but have you considered

~cosplay

~Halloween costumes

~acting

~cosplay

~stretching to reach stuff and shrinking to fit through spaces

~cosplay

~cosplay

~COSPLAY

[solsolecito]

imagine being at work minding your business and then suddenly you look out the window and see like a 50ft tall flamingo and then someone just says “oh, yeah, that’s just pete, he does this sometimes, don’t worry”

[brightlotusmoon]

“BRB, gonna be a cat-sized dragon for a few hours. Might come home a foot taller with mood tattoos.”

“Don’t antagonize the fae.”

“I AM the fae, Susan.”

[aqueerkettleofish]

Also, consider— people will know it’s you, but it doesn’t say they’ll know what you are. “So is Pete a 50 foot flamingo who changes into a man, or the other way around?” “We.. we don’t know. Barbara asked him once, but he just grinned. She said they weren’t the teeth of a human OR flamingo and she didn’t want to talk about it.”

[frolicking-cat]

Iconic post

[etherealplans]

for a ship to succeed one actors gotta be a little too into it and the other has to have a deep seated homophobia thats actually gayer than being cool with it

[slitherpunk]

but do you play shorter games with worse graphics made by people who are paid more to work less 🤨

[slitherpunk]

the thing about "I want shorter games with worse graphics made by people who are paid more to work less and I'm not kidding" is that these games exist and are out there and you have to make the conscious choice to seek them out instead of just expecting the big companies to deliver this, because they will not

[prettycottonmouthlamia]

The really funny thing about "snakes aren't mammals your snake girl shouldn't have breasts!" is like yeah. Neither should your cat girl.

[prettycottonmouthlamia]

The fact that this is the line drawn is really funny! Human breasts are actually incredibly rare among mammals! We don't know exactly why humans have big bazongas but it's probably sexual selection, which presents the really funny problem

If your snake women having sex with people is normal and expected...then yeah, they're ALSO probably going to have something resembling breasts. They might even just have breasts in all but function.

[prettycottonmouthlamia]

Like yes, non-mammals don't make milk, but you actually don't need the whole kit that humans do in order to make milk. Arguably its not even the important part of the breast to begin with.

[prettycottonmouthlamia]

You also don't need to justify it at all you can just be a pervert about it.

[swiftrunnerfelidae]

We actually have another theory why human breasts are like that, and it's because of our flat faces.

Most mammals have, compared to humans, an elongated jaw. So a little tiny bump of a mammary gland is fine, just enough to get the nostrils away from the teat, and the young can freely breathe while nursing. However, as humans started using fire more and more to cook food - which softened it up, rendering powerful jaws less necessary - their jaws began to shorten, resulting in the development of the chin and other unique facial structures as the face flattened out.

This, of course, meant that babies could suffocate while nursing, which would obviously be bad. But what if... what if nipple further from chest? Bigger bump, so baby's nose have spot to go that isn't directly into mommy's chest? Oh, turns out that works! Of course, as more and more fat stores become dedicated to growing that breast mound to keep baby from suffocating, it becomes harder and harder for the mother to reabsorb that tissue when not nursing (as many other mammals do), so they just... don't. Knockon effects from there, and bam. Tiddies.

Which means if your cat girl has a flat face she probably should still have boobs but if she's got the full muzzle, not so much.

[prettycottonmouthlamia]

That's actually really interesting honestly.

[beardedmrbean]

[ophilosoraptoro]

Behold! The printing titty!

[sunder-the-gold]

I normally tag these posts “specific ass machines” after a minor meme that blew through Tumblr, but I was tempted to tag this one “specific boob machines”.

[ahallister]

(Artist meow25meow seems to have had their Twitter account nuked and I cannot find any other original source to link to.)

[muckmagister]

disappearing into the bathroom at the club only to reappear covered in decorative printing patterns followed by a 10ft lady wearing bowls as a bra

[dont-stop-her-now]

[depsidase]

[black-lodge-gatekeeper]

Bestie English - best friend Bestie Czech - beast, brute, monster

[bnq]

synonyms

[damnednyx]

Bestie

[creatures-in-posts]

Confirmed creature post

[mythmagicetc]

i don’t care if rpf is ethical because i already feel guilty all the time for no reason so i figure i may as well have fun

[dailykaboodle]

Can you draw kaboodle as this?

(the lesbians in question are Kit and Lulu)

Thank you regardless :D

Drawing Kaboodle until Gameoverse is greenlit #5

[homokommari]

no no one else thinks that. no one.

[homophobla]

[homophobla]

Today is litteraly the only day in all of human history where it is physically possible to reblog this. Given that I posted it today

[sibblank]

something something consumption as an act of love

[ggrottoarts]

I think it’s better if this world explodes, actually………