this fathers day my family told me to as least send my dad a text message. after months of not speaking to him. years of fighting with him about who i am. years of him downgrading my transition to a “selfish mistake”.
i cannot wish happy fathers day to someone who once told me if i transitioned i would commit suicide. and then months later outed me to my entire family for being suicidal. who told me he just had my safety in mind and that as my father, it was his duty to protect me.
i cannot wish happy fathers day to someone who once told me that his purpose on this planet was to convince me that transitioning was the absolute wrong decision for me. told me that he, as my father, knew me better than myself and therefore had the final say in what i did or didn’t do to my own body.
i cannot wish happy fathers day to someone who unapologetically told me he would never accept me. told me that he loved me, just not “that” part of me. just could not, and would not ever accept me as trans.
i just cannot wish that someone a happy day, it hurts too much.
i have to be who i am today, and who i am is someone who will not give in to hate.
so this fathers day, this portland pride day, i wish all of the queer folks out there a happy day, and to all the fathers who love their children no matter what flag they fly
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