(nonchalant) (rock hard) i sense that you kill a lot of people
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(nonchalant) (rock hard) i sense that you kill a lot of people
in the past i've described my experience of being an ace with a sex drive as being hungry with no appetite, but actually my experience is more like being hungry and never going out to eat because i always have all the tools and ingredients to make exactly what i want, exactly how i want it, at home. i don't want other people in my kitchen and i certainly don't want to be in anyone else's kitchen. love reading about fictional kitchens, though.
Roach has decided to run away.
It’s just that Geralt and Jaskier have stopped travelling together.
Jaskier always gives Roach the best treats, including the juiciest apples.
So, naturally, what is Horse do if not run away to where the delicious treats are?
If this means Jaskier and Geralt get back together. Well, that’s a bonus
Imagine Immortal! Jaskier who gets a factory reset every time he dies. Scars go away, any previous injuries or non-fatal aches disappear, etc. The only catch is it takes anywhere from a few minutes to several hours/days to come back depending on the extent of his injuries.
But Jaskier isn’t stupid, and so he carries around a very potent poison that can kill him almost instantly, and from experience has been proven to only leave him dead for around fifteen minutes. Because he does travel alone sometimes, and it’s better to kill himself in the middle of nowhere than to risk getting robbed when he’s sick, injured, etc.
Even though he can do it though, he’s not a big fan of it, and prefers to just ride out the pain/sickness with Geralt when possible. Because, okay, dying HURTS, and he’s never been able to find a poison that works rapidly and doesn’t make it feel like he’s being boiled alive, his heart thudding painfully in his chest until it just…gives out.
(Plus, he secretly likes the way Geralt will give him his cloak, and make him tea, and gently check his wounds. The witcher doesn’t exactly fuss, but he does let him ride Roach sometimes when he’s particularly unwell, with the witcher sitting behind him in the saddle and making sure he doesn’t fall off as he dozes.)
But then the mountain happens. And Jaskier is traveling with Geralt again, sure, but now he knows how he actually feels about traveling with a “human”. So even though Jaskier would prefer to just power through the nasty head cold he feels coming on, he digs in the bottom of his pack for the poison as soon as Geralt leaves to hunt. Because he can’t give the witcher yet another reason to leave him, not when the fix is so easy, not when Geralt clearly already wants as little contact, physical or otherwise, with him as possible.
He downs the vial, the familiar spasms taking over him almost instantly, and is about to let his eyes fall shut when he hears Geralt returning far too soon. A Geralt who does not know about Jaskier’s regeneration ability.
But the bard’s mouth has already stopped working, he can’t even lift his head, and the last thing he thinks before he’s gone is that Geralt looked a lot more…concerned? Than he thought he would.
And when Jaskier wakes up in Geralt’s arms, and explains everything, the bard is more than a little confused at the witcher’s insistence that he never kill himself again, at least when traveling with Geralt. The bard tries to argue that sometimes it’s necessary, but agrees to not do it unless it’s an emergency at the wild look in the man’s golden eyes.
Jaskier is still a little worried when he starts to feel another cold coming on two months later, but instead of Geralt leaving him like he feared, the man becomes a verifiable mother hen, refusing to leave the bard alone for even a second. And if Jaskier notes the way all weapons are kept far out of his reach, and the dagger he usually hides in his boot goes missing, well.
A little bit of extra comfort and coddling won’t kill him.
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I think Odysseus is the guy everyone else makes talk to the cops when they show up to bust the party.
I think he could do a really good “Hello officer, how are you?” if he had to.
YEAH EXACTLY
Athena is standing behind him whispering the bylaws into his ear.
hold on i need to look this up
it’s been 15 minutes have you finished reading the Odyssey yet?
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Trail cam catching a deer fawn with the zoomies
wild cats are awesome because they range from “that’s just a cat”
to “are you sure that’s a cat”
el wiwi
wet chungus
You, the queen of a fairy tale kingdom, got cursed to give birth to a princess who’s going to live her life isolated in a tower the first 20 years of her life. Narrate how you avoid your daughter’s fate.
She laughed, when she placed the curse on me. Laughed and laughed. She called me a fool for coming to her, for wanting children who would sap my strength and steal my power.
One child to take my kingdom, she promised me. Well, I’d wanted an heir. It didn’t have to be a curse.
One child the sea would steal. There was room in that. They didn’t have to die, only to love the sea. I would buy the finest ships.
And the third would suffer my grandmother’s fate.
The tower.
Grandmother told me stories about that tower, shuddering. About the isolation almost driving her mad. About the desperate longing for escape. I know what that escape cost her, and my grandfather as well, with his scarred face and limping gait.
That was going to be difficult.
The sorceress’s curse worked. Within the year, I held my first babe in my arms, a sturdy boy who kicked and cried and cuddled against his mother as if he hadn’t been made only to bring me grief. Well, all mothers grieve.
Keep reading
will, have you heard of this television show? truly fascinating; this aristocratic frenchman of a vampiric nature arrives to 19th century new orleans in search of an eternal companion. the man he selects refuses to yield to his murderous nature, even after he is undead, yet despite their bickers they maintain the image of a family for their adopted daughter. tell me, will...will? put the knife down, please. will.
inspired by this lol
order 66 didn’t happen if you au hard enough
Cody had nine cups of coffee that morning, and was vibrating into the fourth dimension so he stopped listening after “execute order six-” order six, CANONICALLY, is “get rid of your communicator as fast as possible”. So that’s what Cody hears, and that’s what Cody relays to the GAR. So Palpatine executes his master stroke and six million clones just YEET their communicators and keep going about their business.
Hannibal's predacious nuzzling when he's in his element, either with his mate or his prey.
That's it. It has my heart.
*chewing at the bars* Shall we speak of the dichotomy of animal and human??
What’s always been so interesting to me is that Will is mostly affected by intangible stimuli, emotions and implications and thoughts, his or other people’s that he can pick up on. He spins up whole temporary worlds in his mind’s eye with his perfect memory, he mirrors people’s speech patterns if he’s around them enough, his empathy soaks up the mere suggestions of emotions like a sponge for his interpretation. He wears non-prescription glasses to block it all out and takes them off when he wants to catch all the details. He moves around his environment in ways that reflect his feelings, ascending to the office balcony when he feels challenged by Hannibal and melting into the shadows when he lets his darkness loose to kill Randall.
But Hannibal is mostly affected by sensory stimuli— he savors his wine with his nose first. Sutcliffe, a former colleague, makes a quip about Hannibal being able to pinpoint the exact perfumes the nurses wore. If he could smell Bella’s cancer from paces away, he could do the same with Will’s encephalitis, yet he gets close enough to feel his warmth, the tickle of his hair. Every time we see a scene of him participating in Will’s mental decline, he’s comforting him with touch. He switches from psychologically soothing blues and browns to vibrant hues as he becomes more involved with the FBI, a poisonous predator in their midst.
At his freest, Hannibal bites Dolarhyde’s throat out and nuzzles Will to feel their proximity— and Will mirrors him, nuzzling into his chest in return, expressing the same sentiments in a way Hannibal understands intimately.
hannibal textposts (4/?)
(bleeding from my wound) notice anythiung differebt about me ;)