ToffeeBadger @toffeebadger - Tumblr Blog

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filmictv

#relatable Skam

vivecguccibelt

tastefullyoffensive

thetenderpassion

tobiasxva-deactivated20170810

Roast the fuck out of them. Being family doesn’t mean you ever have to be okay with that shit.

gender-evil-rose

*slow clapping at the dad*

peep-toe-shoes-deactivated20200

I always reblog this.

prorevenge

I've been told you'd like to hear about my Grandmother...

My grandmother got married in 1962, to a young man in the military. For a wedding present, their parents bought them a house in a nice suburb. White picket fence, whole 9 yards. Not long after they moved in, the next door neighbor planted a mullberry tree on the side of his property, near my grandparent’s driveway. Nothing seemed amiss, but if you know Mullberry Trees, you know that sh*t is about to get real.

About 15 years later, the mullberry tree was OBNOXIOUS. The birds would come and eat the berries, and any car parked in the driveway would get sh*t on, and it would stain the cars and ruin paint jobs. My grandmother, upon realizing the culprit, baked a nice apple pie, walked next door, and asked the neighbor if he’d mind trimming back the branches of the tree that hung over her driveway. He told her not to worry, he’d get to it soon. Three days later, my grandmother opened her door to find a half-eaten pie in the plate, crawling with ants, and a note that said “I changed my mind.”

My grandmother threw out the pie, cursing up a storm, and swearing up and down she’d get him to trim that tree or get him back. City ordinance said she could not trim the tree, as the roots were on his property, so the whole tree was his property.

As the years went by, my grandmother repeatedly asked him, ever so nicely, to trim it back. His responses were always along the lines of “No” and “F*ck off.” Finally, in the mid-90s, my grandmother retired, and received a large bonus from her employer for her 35 years of work. She took the money, and bought the empty lot on the other side of the neighbor, then went to a nursery and bought 16 mullberry trees, planting them along her property line, on both sides of his property. About 3 years ago, he became angry at the damage they were doing to his cars, and cut them all back without permission. My grandmother took him to court, and he was forced to reimburse her for the trees at a markup because they’d had 10 years to grow.

writeasrayne

…. That is hardcore on a level I hardly knew existed.

emmersdrawberry

Thats a level of salty i can only pray I achieve

sonboyadam

isakweek - day 4 ~ favorite friendship:

“I guess I can tell you that..there’s kind of a…thing, between Even and me. We’re…uh, doing stuff.”

“Really? That’s…That’s so cool, Isak. Hey, it’s absolutely fantastic.”

“You’re not surprised.”

“Isak, the first time I met you, you were sitting by yourself in a gay bar at 02:00 in the morning and you didn’t want to go home. “

silversunsandgoldenmoons

johnnyjoestarrelatable

me: i have an oral exam in my french class tomorrow i’m super nervous

boy: oral exam huh ;) ;) ;)

me:

justbadpuns

Here’s justbadpuns top 10 posts of 2016!

sneech-deactivated20151113

littlespoonevan

What do you think jealous evak would be like? I know we got glimpses of it in the past, but now that they're in a relationship, it'd be different. It could be one or the other, or both.

askdjdjsajhd okay let’s discuss this

so i don’t think they’d be like possessive jealous

but there’s definitely some cute/funny jealousy moments

bc like. isak is so needy and i think he does not take kindly to being interrupted

so i imagine a lot of instances where ppl unknowingly interrupt evak when they’re in the middle of a Soft moment and bc they’re in school or the apartment or whatever they have to socialise

even will always stop to talk to kollektivet/the boy squad/whoever and it’s not bc he wants to but these ppl are isak’s friends and he’s still trying to make a good impression so of course he talks to them when they engage him in conversation

isak is glaring daggers at whoever interrupts them and spends the entire conversation either pouting or checked out while he tries to come up with an excuse so he and even can leave

and like. isak loves his friends but he jUST WANTS TO KISS HIS BF OK THEY CAN HANG OUT LATER TAKE THE HINT PPL

even always notices bc he’s attuned to isak’s pouty face and the fact that isak’s a lil bit clingier than normal is always a tell

he normally just pat isak’s leg in sympathy

but he’s also hella good at coming up with excuses and making it sound like they’re not ditching whoever they’re with to make out

i think they both get a lil jealous when someone comes up to the other person at a party

bc there are some ppl who are still apparently oblivious to the fact that they’re together and will attempt to hit on one of them

even is the wORST for just inserting himself into the conversation when he sees someone (boy or girl) flirting with isak

like he’ll see isak smiling awkwardly at someone and subtly leaning away from them and he’ll just materialise at his side and drape his arm over isak’s shoulder like, “hi, i’m isak’s boyfriend i don’t think we’ve met”

isak always blushes but he secretly finds it hilarious and loves to tease even abt it bc omg my cool, suave, older bf is jealous of people trying to flirt with mE

whenever the person gets the hint and leaves isak will always sling an arm around even’s neck and be like, “so did you change your name to “isak’s boyfriend” without telling me bc you sure do introduce yourself like that a lot”

even will fit his hands to isak’s waist and say “i could change it to man of your dreams instead?” with a customary eyebrow raise

isak will rolls his eyes but kiss him anyway

when iSAK gets jealous i feel like it’s a lil different???

bc isak is still v insecure and i think when he sees attractive people hitting on even those old insecurities rear their head and he starts thinking oh no what if even likes them? they’re probably funnier than me or more charming

and the thing is, isak kNOWS even loves him. loves him so, so much. but that doesn’t suddenly make isak’s insecurities go away. that’s something that takes time

but then even will catch his eye across the room and smile at him and isak will feel a lil better

besides, even is able to read isak like a book and he knows what that face means so he’ll ditch whoever he’s talking to and make his way over to isak

he always, always greets him in these moments by kissing him and mumbling “i love you” into his mouth bc sometimes he just thinks isak needs a reminder

i think sometimes old jealousy will flare up at the mention of sonja or emma but they’re both trying to let that one go

it’s harder for isak bc even was with sonja for so long whereas emma was a very fleeting blip on isak’s radar

but i don’t think it’s necessarily jealousy but more a worry??? that sonja was better for even???? or that even’s parents prefer her????

but even is always so vocal about how happy isak makes him and how much isak helps him that it becomes really difficult to listen to those doubts????

u kNOW even gets jealous af when he finds out isak had a crush on jonas

and he doesn’t mEAN to bc having a crush on ur best friend is normal when you’re figuring out your sexuality and he knows isak doesn’t have feelings for jonas anymore

but sjdkkfsfh u know when isak first admits it to him he’s like “oh. okay cool. that’s cool. that’s fine. i get that yeah that makes sense jonas is an attractive guy who’s v socially aware and got some good eyebrows yup that sounds abt right-”

and isak is just smirking at him like i can see right through you

it takes even a good three minutes to stop rambling and when he does isak says, “you done?”

even nods, feeling his cheeks heat up in embarrassment

and isak leans in until their faces are just inches apart and murmurs, “good. because for what it’s worth, as soon as i saw you every other guy basically became non-existent”

even whispers “me too” and closes the distance between them, slotting their lips together in a reassuring kiss

doesn’t mean he doesn’t clap jonas’ back a lil harder than necessary the next time they see each other