unhealthy infp disaster

she/her. infp 6w7. sideblog. please don't take this seriously, these are based entirely on stereotypes and are just for fun. also, submissions and requests are allowed!

[totallycorrect-mbti]

ESFP : I didn’t drink that much last night!

ISFJ : You were flirting with ENTJ.

ESFP : So what? They're my partner.

ISFJ : You asked them if they was single...

ISFJ : ...and you cried when they said they weren't.

[totallycorrect-mbti]

ESFP : Mufasa's death scene made me cry again.

ISFJ : Aww, ESFP! It's okay, it's not a real horse.

ESFP : Horse?

ESFP : H O R S E

ISFJ : In my defense, I've never seen it.

ESFP : IT'S CALLED THE LION KING, ISFJ

[totallycorrect-mbti]

ESTP : Subs are so fun to play with. All you have to do is hint at what you might do, or back them into a corner with a look, or grab their wrist in a certain way and they're a wide-eyed mess.

ISFP : Fuck kinda subway are you going to?

ESTJ : Substitute teachers deal with so much shit

INTP : Guys

[totallycorrect-mbti]

ISTP : *Opens door*

ENFJ : Hi, i'm a representative of the neighborhood's community center. Would you like to make a donation for the pool we are building?

ISTP : *Hands them a glass of water and shuts the door*

[totallycorrect-mbti]

ISFJ, in their head: They're probably thinking about other guys.

INFP, in their head: Why do we put round pizzas in square boxes and eat them in triangles???

[totallycorrect-mbti]

INTP : I wonder why I have such a headache.

ESFJ : You haven't drank plain water in over 36 hours, your sleep pattern is nonexistent, and your work schedule is so fucked up that you barely eat an actual meal.

INTP, sipping their coffee: Interesting.

[totallycorrect-mbti]

ESTJ : You think I enjoy being a mother hen to you all?!

ENFP :

INTP :

ESFJ :

ISFP :

ESTJ : Fine, I'll admit it. It's like crack to me.

[totallycorrect-mbti]

ISTJ : For safety reasons, you guys pretend I'm a burglar.

Everyone : Okay

ISTJ : Give me all your money if you don't want to die.

ESFP : Bold of you to assume I have money.

INTJ : Bold of you to assume I don't want to die.

ENTP : Bold of you to assume I can die.

ISTJ : Seriously, guys?

[totallycorrect-mbti]

ENTP : Whoever murders me best not be caught because I'm aiming to be featured on Buzzfeed Unsolved.

INTP : I love how this implies that OP's murder is inevitable. There is a lot of chaotic energy here.

ENTP : If you met me, you would know it's inevitable.

[totallycorrect-mbti]

ISFJ, sniffing the air: Do you smell that? It smells like... despair.

ISTP : It's probably me.

ISFJ : No, not bitterness. Despair.

ENFP, throwing the door open : Hey everyone, guess how I screwed up today!

[totallycorrect-mbti]

[Text conversation]

ESTP : Only virgins spell words correctly.

ENFJ : But every word in that sentence was spelled right.

ESTP : Listen, I didn't come here to get disrespected.

[totallycorrect-mbti]

[Phone rings at 3am]

INTJ, half asleep : ESFP, why are you facetimeing me right now?

ESFP, drunk, holding a slice of pizza : YOU WANNA KNOW HOW PERFECT YOU ARE? LOOK AT THIS PIZZA...FOR YOU, I'LL DROP THIS PIZZA! IT'S GONE!

ESFP : *Throws the pizza across the street*

[totallycorrect-mbti]

INFJ : Could you ever see us as more than just friends?

ISFP : YES! I’m so glad you asked!

ISFP : I can totally see us as dragons! Hang on, let me find the picture I drew...

[totallycorrect-mbti]

INFP : How do I turn off emotions?

INTP : Okay, first go to settings–

INTP : Wait, I’m a dumbass, I thought you said emojis

INFP : No – I’m still willing to try this, go ahead.

INFP : I’m at settings, what do I do next?

[totallycorrect-mbti]

ISFP : Who is ESTJ to you?

ENFP : They’re the reason I wake up every morning.

ISFP : Aww, that's so sweet.

[next morning]

ENFP : *asleep*

ESTJ, kicks their door down : WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP-

[totallycorrect-mbti]

ISTP : Go over there and flirt with them. Just say some cheesy pick up line or something.

ENTP : Okay, I can do that.

ENTP, to ISTJ : You know, I like you like I like my intrusive thoughts.

ISTJ :

ENTP : Fucking me over in the middle of the night.

ISTP, facepalms : Oh God.

[totallycorrect-mbti]

INTJ : I'm cold.

INTP : Just like my heart.

INTJ : Now is not the time to debate which one of us is more dead inside.