fox

he/they | 21 | forest creature & film nerd | sharing my silly little poems on tumblr dot com

[transientfawns]

I’m fox.

I write silly sad poems and doodle sometimes.

[kakasigama]

[transientfawns]

up in the club asking men if they have games on their phones

[transientfawns]

you call me crazy, but you’re enough to drive anyone mad

[brokenrustedweaponry]

You acknowledged the scars on my heart that you drew.

You kissed them tenderly on their smooth, healed edges.

And now I'm the fool who trusted that you wouldn't reopen the same wounds.

[transientfawns]

I do not have many memories from my childhood, most are fuzzy, lost to time. But a few remain, lodged in my body like splinters.

I remember being eight and the sinking feeling in my stomach when I knew I was caught doing something wrong, when I knew something bad was happening that I could not prevent.

I’ve never felt that as much as I have around you. 

You weave a web of convoluted lies and half truths. I turn a blind eye, full of naive delusions of love. I know I am digging my own grave, and you guide my shovel.

I see your phone flash in the corner of my eye, I wish I hadn't. Half a second of familiar colours and shapes is enough for me to know. A slip of your mask.

I pray to forget. You’ve taught me that ignorance is bliss when the truth is the blade in your hand. I beg and plead, but you wont let it go, even as it's double sided steel bleeds us both.

Love does not whittle at one's heart so, not the way you do.

[transientfawns]

I want to be enough. I try so hard to be good. why cant I be enough for you

[transientfawns]

how the fuck am I supposed to be happy knowing I’m never fucking good enough

[brokenrustedweaponry]

Body comparison Essential iris atrophy and a black hole

[kristina100000]

awesome picture how do i move on now from this moment

[transientfawns]

It’s snowing again.

The ache has subsided, now just a sporadic memory.

I wish we could still be friends, but you're better now, happier. and I know what I am. what we were. I am painfully aware of our eternal turbulence.

So I’ll make my bed in the leaves beneath that gnarled oak out back.

In the sunset glow I will release my jaw, at last.

In the restful night I will carry you fondly amongst dreams.

[transientfawns]

I know it is not fair to ask the sword to be gentle, nor the executioner to hold your hand.

​but god, do I want to. I yearn to be cradled while it all slips away. for you to tell me it will all be okay.

[transientfawns]

You kiss the back of my neck and i want to cry. Blessed by the warmth of the waning summer sun.

I pretend I do not feel the star collapsing in my chest. Ignorance is bliss in the face of the gaping, ugly emptiness left behind.

I hide behind evasive eyes.

The wood stain on your floor looks awfully interesting tonight. I memorize every grain beneath my feet before I risk a sidewise glance.

Reckless.

Meeting your eyes is to look right into the sun. To fly to high and melt again in your embrace.

I don't know how much of me there is left, I am a candle at its end.

But I revel in this sadistic dissection of my heart. A martyr to my own delusion.

I let the night take me and dream of the sun.

[transientfawns]

why is my shitty december poem popping tf off pls i have better writing 😭

[transientfawns]

im too much. always too much and never enough.

[etherealascend]

[transientfawns]

i hate the way you hate yourself. it permeates everything.

i wish i could be myself around you without being punished. without your self loathing polluting my very being.