Treehouse Networkshop

Treehouse Networkshop is a career-coaching, recruiting, and networking business. All blog posts are written by founder, Wesley Hoffman, unless otherwise noted. Follow us on social media: @treehousenetwrk

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The Inspiration behind Paradigm Shift

On May 30th, I’ll be hosting an event at Moonbase Market in St. Louis called Paradigm Shift. In 2014, that’s how my journey started, by hosting an inpromtu happy hour with only the intention of meet new people. Up until a couple years ago, I was hosting an event almost every month at a different spot in the St. Louis area. I even traveled to Kansas City a couple of times to throw a couple. 

The last couple of years have been different though. I’ve transitioned into working with people as a networker, recruiter, and coach, which I spend most of my time focusing on. But after being given the opportunity to speak to the staff at UMSL during their Staff Enrichment Week, I decided it was time to share these words with everyone and connect on a deeper level once again. 

Here’s some clips from the speech...

 During this time of trying to figure out what the hell is going on with life, business, myself, and relationships, I’ve made it a point to focus on self-growth pretty much every day. I’m amazed at the amount of questions I’d never asked myself, the answers that follow, and how the questions never stop coming. 

I used to view the world so differently than I do now. I used to think people were out to get me, and I could never get ahead because I wasn’t smart enough or didn’t have the confidence. That was all correct, because as long as I thought that, in my mind, it was true. So I saw things in reality that reflected those thoughts to me. 

My perspective has changed. I put more intention into the things I say to myself. I give less thought to how others perceive me, and more attention to how I want to perceive myself, and act as if I am that person. 

In a couple of days, at Paradigm Shift, I’ll be elaborating on these types of things and more. I want to share some of the things I’ve learned from others and taught myself, that have helped me break through self-limiting thoughts, beliefs, and my own ego. 

Join us for a night of positive connections and conversations. More info here. 

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Transformational Habits

I love writing on this blog. I don’t do it as often as I used to, simply because I have a new rule: I only write when I feel inspired. My intention is to share thoughts and ideas that have been helpful to me throughout my journey in life. I simply share these things because I think they could help other people too, and that’s why I’m here on earth, to help others. 

As I was looking for inspiration on what to share, and had been thinking about it for a while, it hit me out of nowhere, as it often does. I thought of two things I recently started doing that have drastically changed my perspective and how I go about my daily life. Hopefully, they’ll help you too. 

Setting Intentions. For most of my adult life, I’ve lived without intention. Seriously, I had no idea why I did the things I did. Why did I work the job I was working? Why do I eat meat? Why do I like to go to the movies? Why do I spend most of my time playing video games and drinking beer? Why do we go to baseball games? I never asked myself why. I just did things because they seemed to be the right thing at the time. I got stuck in my routines and was *somewhat* happy enough to just stay stuck in them. 

And I stayed stuck, without an intention until something good enough (but most times bad enough) would happen to get me unstuck. Then I’d move to the next thing. Intention would strike, but usually my intention was to just get out of the situation I was in. 

Now, I’ve noticed how living without intention doesn’t really get me anywhere. One of my beloved characters from Alice in Wonderland once said...

That creepy-ass cat is right! If you don’t know where you’re going, it doesn’t really matter what you do, right?

Basically, what we’re doing by setting intentions is choosing the path we want to take. 

So I started setting intentions in the morning, everyday. Most of the time, during my commute to my office in Soulard. I’ve got about 15 minutes to decide what my intentions will be for the day. It’s anything from “My intention today is to be loving, friendly, and kind to everyone I come in contact with,” or “My intention today is to be focused on my work and be as productive as possible,” or “My intention is to be the best spouse, parent, employee, or business owner I can be.” The more specific you can be, the better, but just remember, having an intention is better than not. It doesn’t really matter what your intention is as long as you have one. And as long as it’s positive and not hurting anyone else. 

The cool thing about setting an intention is, you come up with more ways to live out that intention. If my intention is to be a better husband, and I think about that all day, I’ll start to attract thoughts and ideas on how to be a better husband. The path becomes more clear as I hold that intention in my mind. 

To keep my intentions in mind, at first, I’d write them down. Just one or two sentences was all I needed. Now, I just say them over and over in my mind until they’re imprinted on my subconscious. Put it on a post-it note, set it on your phone’s lock screen, or whatever you need to do, just put it somewhere it will remind you. 

Practice Gratitude. This is something I think we all need to work on more often. About six months ago, I read Rhonda Byrne’s book The Magic. Regardless of whether or not you’ve read or agree with her popular book and movie, The Secret, this book is not necessarily a book about Law of Attraction. It’s a book about how to practice gratitude. 

Gratitude, is a powerful emotion. So often, I find myself focusing on the things I don’t have or the things that are going wrong in life. After reading The Magic, and going through 28 exercises on how to practice gratitude, it’s become a habit and something I do in my daily life. 

If you’re reading this, chances are, you’re holding a phone, tablet, or laptop in your hands. You’re using your sense of touch to hold the device, and sense of sight to see the words. How often are we thankful for our 5 senses? We have these extraordinary gifts of life and we rarely take the time to say thanks for them. 

The funny thing about gratitude is, that similar to intention, it attracts more thoughts of gratitude. Once you start practicing gratitude, you get into this vortex of thought that just keeps putting more things in front of you to be grateful for. I look at my house, my wife, my dogs, my car, office, sense of taste, air, water, coffee, ability to walk, completely differently than I did before. I used to just take all of these things for granted, or look at them negatively. “Sure, I love my house, but I wish it was more like this...” Instead I just stop and say, “I’m thankful for my house and the shelter it’s provided me. So I’ll take care of it and improve it with an attitude of gratitude.”

Sometimes it’s not always easy, and that’s why it’s called “practice.” But I guarantee, if you start setting intentions and practicing gratitude, you’ll see things start to unfold in a different way. A positive way that’s leading you down the path you want to go. 

There is no end-goal with this. There is no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Life is the rainbow and the pot of gold at the end. This is about practicing a way to live and carrying it out. 

If you like what you read and want to keep the conversation going, shoot me an email at [email protected] or book an appointment at weshoffmancoaching.com 

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Life in the moment

Once in a while, something comes along that helps me expand thoughts and ideas in a big way. First, I was really interested in motivational material, then I got involved in the Law of Attraction (which I’ll be talking a lot more about in the near future), but most recently, it was a book called the Power of Now by Eckhardt Tolle that helped me see time and mindfulness in a completely different way. 

Motivation in general points at the idea that there is something to motivate us to do the things that we want to do, or we’re supposed to do. Motivation can be positive or negative. Fear is actually one of the post powerful motivators - fear of failure, fear of losing (time, money, energy), fear of lack. 

But Law of Attraction, mindfulness, and Power of Now showed me something different. The idea that maybe we already have a lot of the things we want. The idea that success and happiness is just a feeling, and if you harness that feeling, success will come to you. I liked that idea! I’m not saying you don’t have to take action and work for it, but the work feels a lot less effortless when you have an attitude of appreciation, gratitude, thankfulness, and success already. When I started to approach the things I wanted to achieve with these attitudes, things started lining up a lot more easily, as if they were supposed to happen. In a weird way, it’s kinda like “If you think it will be difficult, it will be difficult, if you think it will be easy, it will be easy.” Self-fulfilling prophecies. I’ve been working on this for a couple of years now and it’s been an interesting journey. 

Let’s be real though, things are always sunshine and rainbows. Regardless of whether or not you’re trying to attract nothing but positive experiences into your life, things are going to happen that we just can’t control. We tend to get overwhelmed, and live too much in the uncertainty of the future, or the frustration of the past. So much, that we never really have a firm grasp on how good things are in the moment. 

I could honestly write several blogs about the Power of Now and all the different topics it covers, but the main takeaway for me was…

Now is the the only time we ever have, have had, or will have. 

This idea got me thinking… I’ve been guilty of living too much in the future. What do I want to happen tomorrow? Next week? Next year? Don’t get me wrong, it’s good to have a vision and goals, but there’s also a lot of work to be done now. I’ve also been guilty of living in the fear of uncertainty of the future - how am I gonna pay this bill that’s due in a few days? How I am going to find this person for this job to fill? What if no one shows up to this event?

And, we can live in the past, thinking thoughts like “I hope what happened last year, doesn’t happen again this year,” or “Man, remember how bad that argument was a few months ago, ugh, that made me so angry!” Or we limit ourselves by thinking our past determines who we are now, and who we’ll be in the future, which just flat-out isn’t true. Every moment (every Now) is a chance to be the new version of yourself. 

When we have these thoughts, and we “live” in the past or future, we’re not being thankful for the moment we’re currently living in. We’re feeling the emotions of anxiety, sadness, anger, frustration, or confusion. And when we stop, and really start to appreciate the moment, all of that starts to fade, and peace, love, gratitude, and happiness present themselves. 

Yes, we all have situations we need to deal with, problems that need to be solves, and goals we want to achieve, but when we attached an emotion to them - stress, anxiety, frustration, confusion, overwhelm - that doesn’t help us deal with them with any more ease. 

Slipping into the Now help me calm down, find peace of mind, and deal with these situations in a relaxed way. When I stop thinking about everything that’s happening on my phone, the internet, and everything else there is to think about, life is pretty beautiful. It’s almost as if time stops. It’s full of love and beauty, we’re just so wrapped up in everything else, we fail to see it, as simple as it is. 

Putting this into practice can be difficult. That’s why they call things like meditation “a practice.” We never fully reach a point where we become fully accomplished. We just keep practicing. Somedays it’s good, and somedays it’s bad, but you just keep going. 

I’m really excited for 2018 and how things are shaping up. On March 22nd, I’ll be playing a show at Pat Connolly Tavern with some friends, and I’d love for you to be there. More info is here positivepunk.eventbrite.com. 

This year, I’ll be focusing more on things like Law of Attraction, mindfulness, and positive thinking. If you want to continue the conversation, email me at [email protected] 

[treehousenetworkshop]

Life in the moment

Once in a while, something comes along that helps me expand thoughts and ideas in a big way. First, I was really interested in motivational material, then I got involved in the Law of Attraction (which I’ll be talking a lot more about in the near future), but most recently, it was a book called the Power of Now by Eckhardt Tolle that helped me see time and mindfulness in a completely different way. 

Motivation in general points at the idea that there is something to motivate us to do the things that we want to do, or we’re supposed to do. Motivation can be positive or negative. Fear is actually one of the post powerful motivators - fear of failure, fear of losing (time, money, energy), fear of lack. 

But Law of Attraction, mindfulness, and Power of Now showed me something different. The idea that maybe we already have a lot of the things we want. The idea that success and happiness is just a feeling, and if you harness that feeling, success will come to you. I liked that idea! I’m not saying you don’t have to take action and work for it, but the work feels a lot less effortless when you have an attitude of appreciation, gratitude, thankfulness, and success already. When I started to approach the things I wanted to achieve with these attitudes, things started lining up a lot more easily, as if they were supposed to happen. In a weird way, it’s kinda like “If you think it will be difficult, it will be difficult, if you think it will be easy, it will be easy.” Self-fulfilling prophecies. I’ve been working on this for a couple of years now and it’s been an interesting journey. 

Let’s be real though, things are always sunshine and rainbows. Regardless of whether or not you’re trying to attract nothing but positive experiences into your life, things are going to happen that we just can’t control. We tend to get overwhelmed, and live too much in the uncertainty of the future, or the frustration of the past. So much, that we never really have a firm grasp on how good things are in the moment. 

I could honestly write several blogs about the Power of Now and all the different topics it covers, but the main takeaway for me was...

Now is the the only time we ever have, have had, or will have. 

This idea got me thinking... I’ve been guilty of living too much in the future. What do I want to happen tomorrow? Next week? Next year? Don’t get me wrong, it’s good to have a vision and goals, but there’s also a lot of work to be done now. I’ve also been guilty of living in the fear of uncertainty of the future - how am I gonna pay this bill that’s due in a few days? How I am going to find this person for this job to fill? What if no one shows up to this event?

And, we can live in the past, thinking thoughts like “I hope what happened last year, doesn’t happen again this year,” or “Man, remember how bad that argument was a few months ago, ugh, that made me so angry!” Or we limit ourselves by thinking our past determines who we are now, and who we’ll be in the future, which just flat-out isn’t true. Every moment (every Now) is a chance to be the new version of yourself. 

When we have these thoughts, and we “live” in the past or future, we’re not being thankful for the moment we’re currently living in. We’re feeling the emotions of anxiety, sadness, anger, frustration, or confusion. And when we stop, and really start to appreciate the moment, all of that starts to fade, and peace, love, gratitude, and happiness present themselves. 

Yes, we all have situations we need to deal with, problems that need to be solves, and goals we want to achieve, but when we attached an emotion to them - stress, anxiety, frustration, confusion, overwhelm - that doesn’t help us deal with them with any more ease. 

Slipping into the Now help me calm down, find peace of mind, and deal with these situations in a relaxed way. When I stop thinking about everything that’s happening on my phone, the internet, and everything else there is to think about, life is pretty beautiful. It’s almost as if time stops. It’s full of love and beauty, we’re just so wrapped up in everything else, we fail to see it, as simple as it is. 

Putting this into practice can be difficult. That’s why they call things like meditation “a practice.” We never fully reach a point where we become fully accomplished. We just keep practicing. Somedays it’s good, and somedays it’s bad, but you just keep going. 

I’m really excited for 2018 and how things are shaping up. On March 22nd, I’ll be playing a show at Pat Connolly Tavern with some friends, and I’d love for you to be there. More info is here positivepunk.eventbrite.com. 

This year, I’ll be focusing more on things like Law of Attraction, mindfulness, and positive thinking. If you want to continue the conversation, email me at [email protected] 

[treehousenetworkshop]

Spiritual Sense

This post has been a long-time-comin’. I’ve hinted at it in previous posts about transformation, changing your mindset, and shifting your paradigm, but we haven’t dove deep enough into spirituality. Mainly because I needed time to get to a place where I felt comfortable sharing about it. 

I was brought up in a very loving, Christian family. Not unlike many of you that are probably reading this blog. I always felt as if I was connected to something. God? A higher power? A higher version of myself? The Universe? Source Energy? We all have different names for it, and I don’t believe it matters what you wanna call it. But when I spent time in my room alone, when I was a kid, and I focused on feeling good, and happy, I could feel it. A greater feeling of joy and happiness, or sometimes a voice or thought that would help guide me in the right direction when I was sad. Not an audible voice, but just a different thought or feeling that what I was experiencing the majority of the time. Some kind of emotional guidance system if you will. 

Whether you’re a spiritual person or not, I believe we all have this sense or feeling within us. Think about it. We say things like “I know this about myself,” or “I don’t like this about myself” or “I’m learning things about myself.” These phrases in and of themselves suggest that there are two parts to us, or two parts to our minds, right? We have the ability to see ourselves from a different perspective. It’s quite fascinating!

(Photo by Cory Miller)

As I got older, that voice and that feeling started to quiet down. Practicality started to sink it. I started thinking with the “human” part of my mind. My ego or identity if you will. At one point, I had convinced myself that we’re not spiritual beings at all. We’re just here, on Earth, doing whatever the hell we want, and it doesn’t really matter. That’s one way to think about life, and there’s nothing wrong with that. 

But when I needed help, when I didn’t know what to do, I found myself asking questions. When I quieted my mind, I could feel that feeling again, I could hear the “voice” again. It was there to guide me. It was there to tell me everything was going to be ok. No matter what emotion I was feeling at the time, or what was going on, I had access to my “spirit,” it was there to help, tell me the right thing to do, and encourage me in a way. 

If you’ve gotten this far, you might be thinking “what has this dude been smoking” haha! Don’t get me wrong, I’ve definitely asked myself if I’m crazy too!

Some of the religion I had learned early in life had me confused. Religious people will tell you that voice is God or Jesus or Allah, or whoever depending on what religion they subscribe to. And that you should read the Bible or a different ancient book to tell you what to do. I didn’t want to believe that anymore though. I still hadn’t given up on the idea that God exists (and I still haven’t), but that got me asking, if I don’t believe in this classic narrative about God, and this “voice” or “spirit” is still there, how can that be? (For the record, if you believe in God or subscribe to a religion, I think that’s great! That’s one way of explaining all this, but I now believe there are many others too. It just depends on what works for you.) 

It was hard for me to break out of my old ways of thinking. I had a really hard time determining what makes someone a good person if they don’t subscribe to religion? How can this all be measured? What truly guides us?

I’ve thought about this every day for the last 2 years or so. I started a meditation practice (the practice of quieting the mind). I started floating in a sensory deprivation tank to block everything out and see what was left. I talked to other people who seemed to understand and make sense of spirituality. I started reading books about positive thinking, Law of Attraction, the subconscious and how it works, and looking up YouTube vids on lucid dreaming, psychedelics, the Universal Laws and more. I started having conversations that went much deeper than most. I wanted so desperately to understand. 

(Photo by Jacob Boyd)

Here’s where I’m at now. The conclusion I’ve come to is this: we are spiritual beings. At the least, I can believe that. However you want to explain how that’s possible is up to each and every one of us to decide. Or not - you don’t have to believe that we have a spirit and can say that we’re just beings living on this planet and after that we return to dust. But I believe there’s more. I want to believe there’s more. Humans are different than any other being on the planet. We have reason, we have intelligence, and we have a full spectrum of emotion which can be extremely difficult to decipher and navigate. 

I think most of us have silenced that spirit. The spirit that once pushed us to do the things we love, do “the right thing”, work for the greater good, and see past the limitations of our “human” mind. I definitely went through this for a long time; reacting to everything instead of responding, talking before thinking, and just going about my day not connecting with (and ignoring) who I really am, my spirit. I wanted to wake up and stay awake. 

Now, that feeling of connectedness is back in full effect. I’m putting effort and energy into connecting with it every day. To focus on my emotional well being, to figure out what’s best for me. Which is something you and only you can figure out. 

This purpose of this post isn’t to give you an answer to the meaning of life, but if you’ve read this whole thing, thank you. You’ve read it for a reason, and I hope it’s benefitted you in some way. I hope it helps you make more sense of the spiritual. 

To keep the conversation going or reach out to me directly, email [email protected] 

[treehousenetworkshop]

Paradigm Shift

It was like a slap in the face. It hit me like a ton of bricks. It’s a conclusion we all have to come to on our own. It changes everything. Once this hits you, you can never go back to the way things were. 

It’s a paradigm shift. 

The definition of a paradigm according to google is “a typical example or pattern of something; a model.” For this blog, I like to think about it as the way we look at things. It’s a pattern, and we get stuck in it. 

I’ve come to the conclusion that most of us inherit a paradigm. We’re born into this world, not really knowing where we are in relation to the rest of the world. We might travel, meet new people, and learn things along the way, but how often do we examine how we view the world and what we’re thinking about most of the time? 

I hardly ever did. And I found myself often confused, wondering why we, as a collective society, do the things we do and why we’re all just ok with the way things are. I didn’t want to question myself. I was afraid, that after all these years, the way I was viewing the world and looking at life might be *gasp* wrong!

Being the curious person I am, after many conversations with people who think differently than me, and reading several books that woke me up, I realized they way I looked at life wasn’t beneficial to me and what I wanted to accomplish. 

(Photo by Cory Miller)

I had been under the classic paradigm. The idea that the world’s a tough place, everyone’s out to get you, it’s really hard to be happy, it’s a dog-eat-dog world, don’t trust anyone, take what you can get and don’t share it with anyone. Honestly, I don’t know at what point a lot of these thoughts entered my mind. I guess listening to enough people with that same mindset, makes you think that way. 

A common phrase I hear all the time is “perspective is reality.” This is often thrown around even in my own blog posts and podcasts. If that’s true, and we’re living under the paradigm like I mentioned in the previous paragraph, we’ll create scenarios where people are out to get us, it’s hard to be happy, trust people, and we’ll live under that veil. Even if it isn’t true. 

As I started to have more of these conversations and read more of these books, I realized I didn’t want to look at the world through that old paradigm anymore. I actually wanted to live in a world that was the opposite. A world where people want to help you, it’s easy to be happy, you can trust people, and where you can share what you have with others. 

This shift is far from easy. We’re talking about taking our thoughts and redirecting them to the opposite of what we inherently want to think. It’s counterintuitive; it doesn’t feel right. 

Much to my surprise, I don’t run into too may people wanting to take advantage of me, it isn’t that hard to be happy, and if you live under this paradigm, you find others who view the world the same way. Don’t get me wrong, there are still bad people out there, that want to do others harm, but that’s where the big lesson came in for me. 

People don’t do things to me, they do them for themselves. 

I do my best to apply this to every aspect of my life: marriage, business, relationships, friendships, anything. And I have to apply it to myself too. When I do things that hurt or upset people, it’s usually because I feel some sort of need to lash out, or I’m annoyed, irritated, or frustrated. Nine times out of ten, it has nothing to do with my like or dislike toward that person. 

Whether you believe this to be true or not, it can set you free. So often in life, I was playing the victim; thinking everyone and everything was against me. This new paradigm set me free from being the victim all the time. That’s not to say I don’t do anything wrong, and I never feel like the victim, but this helps me see things from a different side. 

I remembered all the way back to college psych class when we learned about abuse. Bullies and abusive people hurt others because of how empty they feel inside. It gives them pleasure or it helps them avoid pain. It usually has nothing to do with the victim. 

This helped me analyze the reasons why I did things too, and decrease the times where I get angry lash out, or do something simply because I want to feel a certain way. It makes me stop, and ask myself why I’m about to do something before I do it. Is this for others or is it for me? 

As I mentioned before, everyone has to come to this conclusion on their own. I’ve told people these exact words, and it still doesn’t sink in; we have to want the shift, and most of us don’t, because it takes time, patience, practice and work. 

This was just the beginning of my paradigm shift. I’m still figuring it out, asking questions, and analyzing what I think and why I think it. If you’re reading this, the Universe has brought you to this blog for a reason. I urge you to do the same, but be warned, it will change everything. 

To start a conversation with me email [email protected] 

[treehousenetworkshop]

Perception is Everything

I know I’m due up for a blog post; it’s been a minute. But over the last couple of weeks, it’s been hard to land on a topic that excites me. I mean, with all that’s going on in the world, believe me, there are tons of topics. But when I’m looking for some kind of profound idea about networking, motivation, or entrepreneurship, I’ve got nothing. 

So I looked back at some of my recent blog posts. That’s one thing I love about the internet, everything is so permanent, but yet so temporary. TimeHop is there to remind you of the time you drank too much at your cousins wedding, or provide you with a cool memory of a show or baseball game you went to with your friends. Everything has it’s good and bad side, it depends on how you look at it. We can choose to hate or love it. 

But this blog is here to remind me of how I’ve changed. It keeps track of the changes, the shifts, and transitions. I can look back, and read what I thought were deep, introspective pieces at the time, and realize they weren’t really that deep at all. I’ve outgrown them. Maybe they were ego-driven or written to make myself feel a certain way. And some of these posts are just me processing through things, teaching myself something through writing about it. 

I look back at some of these experiences and lessons, and I can’t help but be grateful for everything life’s thrown at me these last few years. I’ve went through so much personal and professional growth. Sometimes it’s tough. If I’m being honest, sometimes I miss the comfort and stability of collecting a paycheck every two weeks, leaving work “at work”, and the excitement of collaborating with a team. 

At the same time, it would be so difficult for me to give up the freedom, time, and flexibility to live life the way that suits me best. The extreme highs that come from helping a client find an employee, helping someone make a connection, or the realization that business is good and how far I’ve come. 

I used to think that life was a constant struggle; that it would take me forever to get to where I wanted to be. Guess what? I was right, I never got to where I wanted. I always felt frustrated. “If I only had _________ I’d be happy, I’d be where I want to be.” Well, one day earlier this year, I looked around and realized I had a lot of the things I once wanted so badly - freedom, flexibility, family, friends, a music studio to play music in whenever I wanted and as loud as I wanted, a large network of people who are waiting to help and be helped, and the financial success I thought was so difficult to attain. When I started thinking these things were easier, they got easier. 

As I write this, I’m realizing the point of this blog - it’s all in our own perception. It’s up to each and every one of us to decide what happiness means to us. Your own personal happiness could be staring you right in the face, but if you don’t make a decision to look for, and recognize it, you’ll continue to be unhappy. 

(Photo by Cory Miller)

And that’s the beauty of life! No one is better than the other because of what they’ve achieved, or what their idea of happiness is. The entrepreneur or business owner who wants to build a multi-million dollar business is no better than the stay-at-home parent, who is doing that because it’s what makes them happy. Each of those things comes with a different set of challenges. And the world needs both of those people to do those things. It all works in harmony and it’s truly amazing when you see how it’s all connected. 

My challenge to you, the reader is this: find your own happiness. Sit down with a notebook, ask yourself some really tough questions about your current situation, what do you love/hate about it? What would make your life better, happier? Once you’ve figured that out, hold those thoughts in your mind. Think about what that life looks like, and hold that picture in your mind so closely, it becomes a reality. 

I’m not saying it’s going to be an easy road, there will be fears and challenges to over come, but you’ll be pursuing your own happiness, and nothing can take that from you unless you let it. Overcoming fears and challenges might really make you happy!

After all those things I mentioned I had, and realizing I had gotten to a place that I wanted to be with my business, projects, etc. I realized happiness comes from within. We decide what will make us happy, and it shouldn’t matter what anyone else thinks of that. Be you. Do your thing. Find your happy.

That’s all I got for now. 

Email me if you’d like to talk more: [email protected] 

[treehousenetworkshop]

Ditch The Coffee Date

If you’ve opened this blog, first of all, thank you! Second off, I’m not going to tell you not to get coffee with someone. Get that coffee meeting. Go on as many as you possibly can and connected with as many people as you can. 

But a beverage doesn’t always have to be involved in a get-to-know you type of meeting. When I first stated Treehouse, I was meeting with people all the time. Sometimes it felt like I lived in the coffee shops and bars where I liked to meet up. Every once in a while, someone I was going to meet with would suggest doing something completely different than the standard coffee or happy hour.

If you’re looking to meet someone on a professional level, but want to make a deeper connection, or do something different, here are some ideas. These are all things I’ve done or would love to do when meeting a new friend or professional acquaintance.  

Fitness Activities. A few years ago, I was training for a half marathon and started talking to a fellow runner at an advertising networking event. We got to talking, and decided it would be cool to go running and get to know each other on the run instead of getting coffee. So we went on a run. He was way faster than me, but this run specifically has stuck out in my mind since then.

The Zoo. I was introduced to my friend Marc a couple years ago. We met up for lunch once and realized we both love nature documentaries, so we decided to hang out at the zoo one time at like 8am. It was way more fun than we expected. There weren’t very many people there, so you kinda have the park to yourself, and if you’re in St. Louis, the zoo is free :)

(Taken on my last zoo trip.)

Walk. In Steve Jobs’ biography I remember it was mentioned several times that Steve liked to go on walks and have conversations with people. I’m totally down with that too. I recently had someone suggest going on a walk around a park while we talked and got to know each other. I definitely remember that meeting more than most other meetings I’ve had. If you’re in a neighborhood, it’s cool to see someone’s office, then walk around the neighborhood a bit. We have so many awesome little neighborhoods in St. Louis too. 

Common Interests. I love walking around comic book and record shops. I don’t normally buy much if anything at all. I’m not really a collector. I just like looking at the stuff. If anyone else likes this nerdy stuff, and you wanna meet up, I will gladly meet you at Vintage Vinyl, Record Exchange or Star Clipper. If you have a common interest - why not share an experience together? Talk about your favorite records, artists, and comics.

Other Networking Events. If you’re planning on going to a networking event that week, why not ask the person to meet you there? There’s even more opportunity and value in that. I’ve extended invitations to events I’ve went to around town, or suggested people to come to a Treehouse event, where I can then introduce them to more people and help even more. 

My hope is this helps. Doing some of these things with the purpose of connecting with someone new creates a memorable experience. If you’re interested in connecting with me and doing some of things things the first time we meet hit me up at [email protected] or stayconnectedstl.com. 

Happy Networking!

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5 Tips for Passive Job Searching

As a networker, connector, and recruiter, I talk with a lot of people who aren’t “actively” looking for the next job opportunity. However, they would jump at the right opportunity if presented to them. After a few recent conversations like this, it got me thinking. 

Looking for a new job is almost a full-time job in itself. But, there are ways to be on the lookout for the next thing. I like to think of this as “passive” searching. You’re not quite ready to search full-time, but you want to know what’s out there. I came up with a few tips that might help this passive search. 

1. Mindset. I was at a job for almost 5 years. When I started actively looking, I realized I had to change my mindset. It had been so long since I had even thought about a new job. I had to be open to opportunities, and train myself to recognize them. This is going to sound super simple, but an easy way to do this is to just mentally say, with meaning “Today, I’m open to opportunities that come my way.” When you do that, you start to recognize things you may have not seen before. It could be on social media, or you might overhear a conversation about an opening. However, you may not recognize them if you don’t have this mindset. 

2. Alerts. LinkedIn and Google have alerts systems that will notify you when something that might interest you gets posted. Spend a little bit of time creating these alerts for companies and positions you’d like to know about. Set the parameters, and you’ll receive an email when those companies or positions open up. It’s very easy and passive!

3. Tell Your Friends. Again, super simple, but very powerful. Letting your spouse, partner, parents, friends, or whoever else know that you’re open to something new plants a small seed in their mind. I’ll guarantee you, sooner rather than later, you’ll be hearing from someone you told about an opportunity they think you might be a fit for. 

4. Visualization. This is big for me. When working with people as a job coach, I often ask them what their vision is for their career, or what type of position or company do they see themselves working in. Having a vision to work toward, speeds things up a bit. You know what you’re looking for, so you’re more tuned into recognize similar opportunities. You don’t have to do anything specific, but just think about a place you want to work. When I was searching, I new I wanted to work somewhere with flexible hours, with a creative and collaborative environment, and with people who were positive, and carried out the companies mission. Soon enough, I was working at a place that fit that description almost to a T.

5. Reach Out. This one’s a little more on the active side, but hear me out. If you know someone who works at a place you might want to work at, hit them up! Ask them to go to lunch, or if you can swing by their office before or after hours to check it out. Informational interviews still exist! If you don’t know someone at that place, try making a connection on LinkedIn or getting an introduction from someone who does know someone there. I’ve done this several times; it’s almost always lead to a phone call from that company or an interview. 

Sometimes we can get so stuck in the day-to-day of our jobs, by the time we think about the next step in our career, it can be too late. If you know you’ll be looking to make a career move within the next year or so, start doing a few of these things and you’ll be ahead of the game. 

If you have any questions, comments, or want to grab a cup of coffee, feel free to email me at [email protected]. Job coaching/recruiting inquiries - stayconnectestl.com. 

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The Only Time That Matters...

So, here we are again. It seems I always come back to this blog when I have some kind of important life lesson to share or have just went through something extraordinary and want to share what I’ve learned. This post is no different :)

This summer, we did something that I didn’t think would ever be in the cards for me. We took our podcast/platform, THE STRANGEHOUSE, on the Vans Warped Tour for about 5 days. When we started doing this podcast three years ago, never did I think I’d be writing a blog, reflecting on it if I fast forwarded in time. 

This experience made me think about how I view time. I used to view time in compartments; or different phases of my life. I remember thinking things like “I’m almost 30, I should be making more money, be in a leadership position at my job, etc, etc.” or, “I’ll work this job for a while, and then one day I’ll start my own business.” As if those things would happen someday, but definitely not right now. 

After three years of being self-employed and trying to build several projects from the ground up, they way I view time has drastically changed. 

The only time that matters is now...

I was postponing doing the things I really wanted to do, and being who I really am. Once I shed those thoughts and ideas, and realized that all I could live in was “now,” it started helping me see how important it is to plant seeds for the things you want in life now. Even if that means simply thinking about them...what are your dreams? What do you need to now, to realize them in the near future? Who can help you? How will you make this a reality?

This might all sound easy. It’s easy to think about stuff, right?! Haha! Of course it is, but we also have to take action, and that’s work. But when you really love what you do, it never seems like work. 

This summer has been one of the busiest I can remember. At one point, I took inventory of all the projects I was involved in, and realized I had created a lifestyle where everything I was working on - I loved! And most of those things were brining in a decent stream of revenue. 

It didn’t happen overnight thought it might seem that way now. I started planting the seeds and vision of this lifestyle a long time ago. I couldn’t always see it clearly, but I knew what I didn’t want, and that drew me closer to what I wanted.

I will admit, there are still many things I don’t know and situations I have to figure out every day. That used to scare me, but now it excites me! It means there’s always opportunity for growth and learning. It’s still scary at times, but the more I’m put in these situations, the more I learn to trust myself. That’s part of the process of living in the now. 

I’ve problem written multiple blogs about “living in the moment” in the past, but this is a little different. There’s a strange excitement or almost a fear of NOT living in the moment that pushes me forward, and makes me re-evaluate what I’m working on. 

I’m 34 years old and never thought I’d have the opportunity to go on Warped Tour as a media partner. It took a lot of work, but also a lot of “quieting the voices,” the voices that tell you why you shouldn’t do it, don’t deserve it, or you should grow up and move on.

But at the end of the day, I’m living in now, and that’s the only time that matters.

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Powerful Beliefs

I was an early adopter of blogs dating back to the days of Xanga. I always hated starting a blog out with “I know I should write more on here, but...” So I won’t do that this time :P

When I started this page several years ago, at first it was a way for me to share music, articles, quotes, etc. One Treehouse gained some steam, I transitioned it to articles and posts about networking, human interaction, and inspirational articles about experiences and stories I’ve learned a lot from. Now, I like to simply just think of this page as a place where I can unload the thoughts that keep me up at night. 

I’ve always been an inquisitive person. I’ve always looked for the deeper meaning in songs, paintings, poems, or even an underlying tone to what someone said. I’ve never looked at things as just face-value. Because of that, sometimes it backfires and I look like an idiot. This isn’t to say I’m “better” than anyone or everyone, I just look back now and understand previous situations so differently. 

Now, I’m still an inquisitive, curious person, probably more than ever. Now, I don’t just look for the deeper meaning, I feel as if I’ve trained myself to see the deeper meaning. Even if it’s not really “there” or it’s not what a person meant with their art or music, I’ve decided to define a deeper meaning to something and that makes me happy. It helps me understand things. 

Reflecting on previous experiences, I remember multiple occasions when I asked different “higher-ups” about how they made it to where they are now. How is someone the same age as me in a higher-position than me? How is someone only a few years older an executive and I’m the salesperson they’ve been charged with managing? When I’d ask these people “what’s mostly attributed to your success?” I would almost never get a straight answer. It would just be the same-old stuff “Well, work hard, get to know the right people, exceed expectations, etc.” That wasn’t a good enough answer for me, there was no formula there, and that’s what I was looking for - a formula. 

I, myself, wanted to be successful. I wanted the same abundance, prosperity, and opportunities these people appeared to have. It was almost as if these people were born into it, or had just followed the path in front of them and hadn’t really thought about how they got there. Understanding this now, and having learned a few new things, I’ve gained more insight into all this. It’s actually pretty simple when you think about it. 

We get what we believe we deserve. 

Think about it, how often has an opportunity come along that you didn’t believe you deserved? Just out of the blue, dropped in your lap. It’s this strange thing with the Universe where once you believe you’re capable and deserving, you receive whatever is you’re wanting. And that doesn’t mean that it just drops out of the sky and is handed to us, but maybe an idea of how to get what it is we want pops into our head (which is called inspiration!), or the steps to achieve it become super clear and we’re on our way to getting it. You don’t get it until you feel the feeling of having it - which is no easy task. 

Some of these people were born into the belief that they deserve it. They’ve always believed they deserved the best job, with the best salary, and best working environment, etc. That’s why they get it. 

This is something I’ve begin to help others with and practice myself. Two questions immediately come to mind: What do you want? How do you cultivate the belief that you deserve it and can obtain it? 

Well, for most of my life, I’ve been wondering around this world not knowing what I want at all. I was just taking opportunities that came my way. Now, I’m constantly focusing on what I want all the time. Sometimes it’s money, a trip, an experience, opportunity, or something more out of a relationship/friendship. Whatever it is, I fixate on it and think positively about it. I get thrilled when I think about it and imagine how I’ll feel when it finally manifests. 

And that’s what it means to believe. Whatever it is you want, you have to put that idea so deep into your subconscious it would be almost impossible for it not to appear and become reality. It’s what people really mean when they tell us to “believe in ourselves.”

A simple example - money. How much do you want? Think about that amount, how could you get it? Visualize yourself getting it. Think about how it will feel when you get it. What will you do with it once it’s here? This is something I’ve done and continue to practice. Write down what you want and what you’re going to do to get it. Then do it. I’ve thought about something so much that the answer has come to me in a dream or random thought that’s popped into my head. Walk around as if you’ve already received it, and all of the sudden, you’ll start finding the path to it much more quickly. 

We can continue to cultivate these beliefs through affirmations, meditation, and persistence. It’s not always easy, but it gets easier. 

Those people I asked about how they achieved their success - that’s the answer. They thought differently than most people. They had an attitude about them that attracted what it was they wanted. For some of these people, they were lucky enough to have always had that attitude or think that way - that’s why they could never put their finger on the secret to their success. Sometimes the secret to success is to just think bigger; use your imagination. Feel what it means to be successful, to have the thing you want so badly.

The scary thing is this law applies in the opposite way too. Whatever you’re focused on, you get more of. If you’re focused on what you don’t want, the Universe gives you more things you don’t want, thus making you focus more on what you don’t want. When life throws something your way that you don’t want, that’s when you need to focus on what you do want the most. 

If you found this blog post helpful, feel free to drop me an email at [email protected] or visit stayconnectedstl.com

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The Journey

Every single one of us is on a journey. A journey through life. I was unaware what I was looking for most of my life, just reacting to everything in front of me, expecting it to be the answer. But everything I thought was going to be the answer just turned out to be the opposite. Actually, everything that wasn’t the answer pushed me closer to it. 

Now, I like to think I’m intentionally pursuing the journey. I’m intentionally pursuing the answer I was ignoring for so long. I’m constantly digging deep into my own psyche, having deep conversations with others about their journey, reading, meditating, and exercising my mind. I’m no longer reacting to what’s around me, instead, I’m proactive, and working to create the circumstances I want. 

If the title of this blog was enough to get you to stop, click, open, and read the first two paragraphs, THANK YOU! Second of all, you’re probably asking yourself “what is this answer?”

(photo by Jacob Boyd)

The answer, plain and simple, is happiness. We’re all walking, driving, and sitting around hoping to be happy someday - that’s literally the journey most of us are on. Wondering why we’re unhappy with our jobs, relationships, friendships, living situations, etc. And we just can’t figure out why! We don’t know what makes us happy. We’re expecting our circumstances and situations to change, when in reality, they are what they are. It’s up to each one of us, individually, to change our own circumstances and happiness. And again, I only know this because I used to think this way. 

When we’re in this situation, we sit around and talk about how unhappy we are. We complain about the people we work with, our commute, our living situation, our neighbors, our bills, our income... the list goes on. We’re hoping for a change, but we’re so focused on what we don’t want, that we haven’t taken time to sit down and think about what would absolutely, truly make us happy. 

What’s really beautiful about all this is when you get down to what happiness is, it’s different for each person. But this also causes a dilemma. Pursuing what really makes us happy can bring on a few challenges and questions. We ask ourselves: “If I choose to pursue this, will my friends and family still accept me.” Pursuing what makes us happy might also mean massive changes need to be made. 

These are the types of questions I love asking the people I meet with through Stay Connected. I’ve found that many people are trying to figure out what will make them truly happy; how can we become our true selves? Well, the answer is simple, get out a notebook, pen, and start asking yourself the difficult questions you need to ask to find out. And then, start making changes to become that person, or achieve that thing, whatever it may be. The beauty is that it can be whatever you decide, and that can change over the course of your lifetime. You might pursue something you think will make you happy, and it doesn’t, it’s all a part of the journey!

Having previously thought this way, I went through some tough times to come to these conclusions, I now help people figure this out. I’m not here to give you out answers about what will make people happy - everyone has to figure that out on their own. But I am here to help people figure that out, ask the difficult questions, and help them deal with the change and temporary challenges that come along with the journey. 

It’s not going to be easy. There will be people who won’t accept this change, and won’t respect your journey. That is a difficult pill to swallow. But it’s not their journey, it’s not their happiness, it’s yours. And it’s out there for the taking. 

*To learn more about Stay Connected, visit stayconnectedstl.com, or email me at [email protected]*

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The Constant One

One thing I’ve learned in my 33 years on this pale blue dot it’s that everything is in a constant state of change. Think about it, the human race is in a constant state of progression. The more we evolve and learn, the more we invent and begin to adapt. Just a little over a hundred years ago, we couldn’t fly in airplanes. Now, flying has become a common mode of transportation, and routine to some. 

We all want things to be better, all the time, am I right? Sit back, and think about something that you would want to be better than it is. Maybe you’d like a better car, house, apartment, job, salary, relationships, whatever. It’s pretty easy to find something. We’re super quick to pick out the things we want to be better. But we rarely take time to be grateful for the things we already have.

What if I told you, that “better” thing is easier to attain than you thought? What if it wasn’t as difficult as we make it out to be. What if it boiled down to simply changing things up a bit and getting used to change? We might already have what we need to get what we want, but we don’t want to change things up to get it.

(Photo by Jacob Boyd)

Everything is always changing. Everything is always moving. Thing about it, we has human beings are in a constant state of motion, even when we’re sleeping, we’re moving, we’re breathing.

Some of us are unhappy with the course we’re on. I definitely was, and sometimes I still ask myself if I’m on the right path. But if you don’t like the course you’re on, you can change it. We’ve forgotten this along the way, and there’s a whole list of reasons why we have. The main one being fear. 

It’s in our nature to fear the unknown. If we decide to change course, we’re afraid it might not work out. Well, it also might work out the way you plan, or even better than you thought!

When we’re forced into situations where we have to change, it sucks. It’s frustrating. When you lose your job, go through a breakup, or we’re just put in a situation we don’t want to be in, we don’t like it. We resist it, we fight it, because it makes us uncomfortable and we’re afraid.

If we change the way we think about change itself, welcome it, and flow with it, we start to see opportunities and “better” things become more attainable than you thought. Sometimes changing the way you think about something can make all the difference. 

My point is, sometimes we hold ourselves because we fear change. Change is inevitable and constant. If we start thinking about how we perceive change, how it affects us, accept and move forward with it, truly amazing things start to happen. 

If you ever need anything contact me at stayconnectedstl.com or [email protected].

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Becoming You

I often find myself comparing the former me to the current me. It’s interesting to look back on the way you used to think, act, and what your goals used to be. After a couple of years of pretending to be someone I’m not, and jumping from job to job, I realized what I was really searching for was my true sense of self. I thought having a job that semi-fit who I already was would help me define who I want to be. After a few months at each new job, though, I’d still find myself feeling unfulfilled and uncertain of the next step.

I couldn’t figure out what my problem was, why I was getting bored so easily, and how to change it.

A few months ago, a friend loaned me a book called The Four Agreements. I won’t even list what the four agreements actually are, but you should definitely find out for yourself. The book explains, among other things, that we’re all on a quest to become who we really want to be. However, there are many fears that stand in our way.

Most of them have to do with society. We’re afraid to be ourselves because we might be rejected, people might not like us, and we won’t have any friends. We won’t be cool. And that scares us. But everyone else feels the same way, so we all just continue not really saying what we want to say, or being who we want to be. We’re just going through the motions, on autopilot. Not doing anything too extreme one way or another. That was me for a long time. But I knew I wasn’t being myself and was holding myself back.

So I continued going job to job, but nothing changed. I hadn’t changed.

(Photo by Jacob Boyd)

The more I read this book and its thoughts on fear, society, and becoming ourselves, the more it made sense to me. I started to see my past a bit more clearly. I thought about some of the jobs I had where I found success and, conversely, those jobs where I wasn’t successful; jobs where I was supposed to follow a set plan already laid out, and act a certain way that wasn’t me. Doing a job well is hard enough, but having to pretend you’re something you’re not while doing it makes it even harder. For a long time, I had pushed the “real” me away, thinking it was wrong to break the mold and pursue the career I wanted. I had basically stopped growing, learning, or working towards anything in particular.

I thought about the person I wanted to be. What did I admire about other people? Confidence, poise, fearlessness, compassion, and kindness. I started doing things I thought someone who would possessed these qualities would do. Even though I was afraid, and still am sometimes, I do my best to push through and be confident.

The more I continue to step out, and become more of myself, the cooler the experiences and opportunities are that come my way. If we stay the same, we’ll keep doing more of the same, but if we decide to grow, we’ll eventually want to move on. Our minds can infinitely expand and we can never learn too much, but it’s so easy to put limits on ourselves and fall into the monotony of normality. So much so that we can lose sight of who we really are.

Through all this, I’ve realized success, happiness, fulfillment, whatever you want to call it, starts within us. We become who we feel we truly are, we allow ourselves to become ourselves, and the opportunities we’re looking for become clearer. All the things we want start to fall into place as we become our true selves.

The problem is, it’s really freaking hard to change. It’s really scary, because people might not like the new you. But eventually, you get to a point where you realize you either have to be yourself, or please everyone else all the time, and I’d much rather be me.

I’m still working on it. I’m still trying to overcome fear. I’m still working on becoming who I want to be. And I hope I always will.

For more info visit stayconnectedstl.com or email me treehousestlouis at gmail dot com. 

Photo by Cory Miller

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Change Your Mindset

Over the last 3-4 years, I’ve changed my mind about a lot of things. Partly because I started living a life I was unfamiliar with, learning things I didn’t even know existed, and meeting people with differing perspectives on well...pretty much anything. 

I was recently in a conversation with someone who said “You realize how much you don’t know when you decide to start learning.” It’s true. If we’re learning, we’re taking in knowledge that we otherwise didn’t have. I suppose that why I’ve been changing my mind a lot.

If you listen to the Treehouse or StrangeHouse podcasts, or follow us on social media, you know I’m all about the positive vibes. I’m all about personal growth, and learning more about myself, the human race, and how we’re all connected. In this search, I’ve learned about inherited belief. 

Inherited belief, or at least how I understand it, is the idea that we have inherited beliefs, ideas, perceptions, misconceptions, attitudes, insecurities, and comforts & discomforts from people and environments that surrounded us at a young age. We all have them. 

The last six months or so, I’ve been doing my best to recognize something about myself that I don’t understand. Why does it make me uncomfortable to talk about certain subjects? Why do I react they way I do? Why do I think and believe the way I do? After asking myself these questions, I never realized how much of my past I was hanging onto. 

With all these questions rolling around in my head, I came to the conclusion that I can choose what I believe, think, and feel. Regardless of what I was taught growing up, and or what I was taught yesterday, it’s up to me, and no one else, to figure all this out, regardless of what I always thought. I had to change my mindset to a positive one if I wanted my situation to change. 

However, it’s strange... It’s hard letting go of those old beliefs. In a weird way, they’re like a special toy or security blanket you’ve had forever; you feel guilty throwing it away, but you know that’s the only way you’ll move on and grow. But once you let go, you realize there’s a whole world out there you didn’t know about it, and your eyes are open to it. 

A lot of these beliefs have caused me to put limits on myself. They’ve kept me from building confidence, kept me from being open to opportunities, and led me to believe I was incapable of doing many things. Once I started taking chances on myself, “faking it, til making it,” and keeping a positive attitude (especially when I didn’t feel like it), I started to see a lot of changes I wanted take shape. 

Now, more than ever, we’re able to be influenced by thousands of messages a day. Which is why it’s important to consider why we think the way we do, why we believe the way we do, and why we feel the way we do. Is it us really doing the thinking, believing, and feeling? Or is it something from our past telling us we have to feel that way?

I’ve also heard “we are the sum of everyone we’ve ever met.” Meaning we’re influenced just a tiny bit by every person we’ve ever come in contact with, but still remain ourselves. We can do whatever we want with these influences. When we’re younger, we adopt them - no questions asked - we don’t know any better. Now, we can decide whether to accept, reject, or look further into the influence and messages thrown at us on the daily. 

People should change. People should grow. I’d be a pretty frustrated person if I still had the perspective and outlook I did 5 years ago. I remember that place, and it wasn’t a happy one. I was fed up with that life, and wanted something better. I was only living that life because of my inherited beliefs. It wasn’t until I started questioning and thinking for myself that things started to change. 

Start questioning. Start thinking. Become who you want to be. 

For more info visit our website, come to our next event, or email me - treehousestlouis (at) gmail (dot) com. 

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5 Simple Job Searching Tips

During my career journey, I’ve searched for jobs when I was in good and bad employment situations. I’ve looked for a job after being fired. I’ve searched when I was in a good situation just to “see what was out there.” I’ve worked with recruiters. And I’ve been in some environments so bad, I would’ve taken the next thing that came along - no matter what it was. 

(Photo by Cory Miller)

After several transitions, I’ve learned a lot. Most of it the hard way. A lot of things have changed over my journey, but I thought I’d share a few things I’ve learned that might help someone looking for a change. Here we go...

1. Don’t Get Caught Up in Descriptions and Titles Though I know they’re necessary, I really dislike job titles. What one means in one industry means something completely different in another. Descriptions can sometimes get a little too in-depth as well. I’ve never let a title or description keep me from applying. If I might not be a 100% fit for that job, they might have another (whether it be immediately or a later date) that I could be a better fit for. And I want that hiring manager or HR resume to have my resume.  

2. Follow Up It may sound simple, but not everyone does it. Hiring and HR managers are interviewing and looking at tons of resumes and emails. Do something that keeps you top of mind. Email is great, but doesn’t always cut through the clutter. Pick up the phone, send a handwritten note, or get creative and do something that shows your personality. Add value somehow. If you’re not hired for that job, they’ll remember who you are for one in the future. 

3. Use a Notebook Sometimes, we want to make a change, but don’t necessarily know what’s out there. Write down the things you want in a job, and think about the industries that foster and value those qualities. What companies are in that industry? Which ones are in the locale you’re searching? You can eventually move the search online, but an old trusty pen and paper always seems to help me work things out a little more easily. 

4. Set Alerts Looking for a job can seem like a full time job. A lot of times, when we’re looking, we already have a job. The last thing you want to do at the end of the day is open your computer and search for a couple hours. LinkedIn and Google can both set alerts and saved searches. These will let you know when companies have added postings, articles that companies post, or knowledge about a certain industry. 

5. Network Of course this list wouldn’t be complete without networking. For a long time, I thought “I’ll network when I’m looking for a job.” I quickly realized I should’ve been networking all along. Meet as many people as you can, and keep in touch. When something unexpected happens, you already have a network to reach out to, and see if they can help. When I was unemployed, I went to community events, all kinds of networking events, Rotary Clubs, coffee meetups, basically anywhere there was people. I’ve said this a lot, but “where there’s people, there’s opportunity.” Not everyone you meet can hire you, but they could pass your name along, keep their ears open for you, and forward leads and referrals. 

Honestly, I could write about this subject forever. I was going to keep this list at three, and now I’m at five. If you’d like further help on your career journey, head to stayconnectedstl.com and drop me a line. Have a great week!

[treehousenetworkshop]

Keep Your Passion

Whether we realize it or not, there are so many things we’re told not to do. Most of the time it’s not even directly, it’s just a thought. Maybe even something echoing in our head from the past. And sometimes we are the one telling ourselves we can’t do something or we’re not allowed to.

I definitely fell victim to the latter for about 10 years…

When I was 13, I started playing guitar. I loved it. I was practically addicted to learning writing songs and improving. I played and sang in bands through high school, and college, and up until I was about 23. The last time I played a show was back in September of ’06.

Not too long after that, I got a full-time job, and started living on my own. I tried to play in a couple of bands, but I was usually exhausted after a full-days work, and convinced myself it wasn’t worth the time, effort, energy, trouble, or whatever excuse I could come up with.

I've always had a guitar sitting here at home in my basement. Every once in a while, I’d get the urge to play it, but convinced myself not to. It didn’t seem worth it to put my time and energy into something that wasn’t going to benefit me down the line. It was easier to just play a video game or watch TV.

Fast forward to about six months ago… My friend Corey and I had been talking to several musicians on our podcast, StrangeHouse. Even though we weren’t playing anymore, we still loved music and going to shows. Through all that, we became inspired to start playing again.

I was a bit hesitant at first. I still had the feeling that it’s something I shouldn’t be doing. I couldn’t believe we were doing it again after all the years of playing music had been absent from my life. 

I thought my time playing music and shows was over. Now, I realize that was just me telling myself it was. You can give yourself second chances, find your passion again, and keep it. The first step was telling myself it was all possible. I can’t believe I had tucked away this passion and skill that used to make me so happy. 

(Photo by Cory Miller)

A few nights ago, our new band, WHY NOT, teamed up with Rockwell Beer and played its first show to a sold out crowd at The Demo. It was an absolute thrill to be playing again. But it was even more awesome to see the support of our friends, family, and city support a band no one’s heard and beer no one’s tasted. THANK YOU!

Keep your passions. Talk yourself into doing things that make you happy. Instead of thinking about all the reasons why you shouldn’t do something, pick up that guitar, hobby, or passion project and just go. Who knows? Something really cool could happen. 

(Photo by Cory Miller)