Xuebing Du
tumblr dot com
#extradirty
h
KIROKAZE
blake kathryn
wallacepolsom
Andulka
DEAR READER
i don't do bad sauce passes
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oozey mess
ellievsbear
One Nice Bug Per Day
trying on a metaphor
Today's Document
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RMH
noise dept.
cherry valley forever
seen from Malaysia
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from Belgium
seen from Finland
seen from Singapore
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Oman
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Türkiye
seen from Honduras
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seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
@trousersnakehunter
we need to invent a spray tan-style treatment but instead of spraying you with tanning stuff it sprays you with heavy duty spf. and it lasts a few weeks so that way you can just get your spf spray a few times a summer instead of having to spend 10 minutes every day getting sticky and oily and making sure the sunscreen is all rubbed in. how do i get on shark tank
u heard him ladies
so many mornings I need Dionysus to do this for me
don't listen to them babe just keep opening more tabs in your browser
happy if you have scholarly inclinations there is usually something wrong with your sexuality july
redoing that poll bc you guys are not serious people and i need to know the actual stats here
also disclaimer the options in this poll are dumb as hell and kind of hysterical but we can't be doing this i need to know #thetruth
which of these have you done most recently
had sex with another person (NOT masturbation!)
done recreational drugs (NO cigarettes, alcohol, and CAFFEINE dont count guys)
watched bluey
none of these
you CANNOT read too much old timey fiction because I was playing Raft with the lads this morning and without a THOUGHT said we could sail over to another island "if the wind would consent to blow" & let me tell you. This did not pass by unremarked.
I'm married to an entomologist who inadvertently wooed me by introducing me to velvet ants. He proposed during an insect collection trip by pretending to catch a cool bug and asking me to get it out of the net and it was the engagement ring.
LGBTQ+ folk what was your gender/sexuality pipeline?
someone in the UK threw eggs at Charles and was arrested and has been banned from openly carrying eggs in public and has since been sent death threats but their statement on the matter was so fucking good
also let's take a moment to appreciate the picture of this man being arrested
"So my bail conditions were, between my arrest and my trial, were that I wasn't allowed to carry eggs in public." host laughs "Yeah, I know, and so that is in itself like so absurd that it's like right" Host: "I gotta know, is there like a provision for if you're going home from the store? Or are you just, are you just egg-less?" "So the copper who was literally just like making this up at the station says like 'Ok, so your bail condition is: you're not allowed within 500 meters of the king; you're not allowed to carry eggs in public' and then he goes like 'ah actually, like, what 'appens if he wants to buy some eggs?' Ok, so they changed it so it's like, 'You're allowed to carry eggs as long as you're going home from the shops and you've got the receipt" host laughs "And I think, that was more viral than me actually doing it, you know what I mean like, people were like, that's Britain for you, have you got a license for those eggs"
-"The Man Who Egged King Charles", It Could Happen Here, May 18 2023
At the post office today:
Man with beautiful silver undercut and a coach bag: can I get a sheet of stamps please
Clerk: does it matter what kind?
Man, with homosexual despair: EVerything matters to me, unFORtunately.
video ive been thinking about for days
