TvStatic

Poet?

[tvstaticnois3]

TvStaticNoise

[tvstaticnois3]

Last Time I Cried

I don't remember the last time I cried,

But I remember the last time I was with you.

I wanna be with you through the dark to the light.

Can you show me what's it like to be alone?

[tvstaticnois3]

Want to be wanted.

I look for a person I've never met in people I've met.

I imagine someone like me, as I lose hope in finding real people.

"Please listen to me and make me feel wanted."

Does wanting to be wanted mean I'm seeking attention? If yes, then please just give me attention.

I want to be found, please, I'm not a needle lost in a haystack.

Just pick me from your sowing kit for once.

I'll pierce through every fabric you want me to and more.

To be loved is to be seen but I must be invisible since no ones ever loved me.

I feel like the distance between me and everyone I've ever talked to and it rips me apart every time I see two people together.

Just for once make me feel wanted so this awful screaming will stop. Though I know it will never stop and I'll never win.

October 17th 2025

[tvstaticnois3]

Why don't we talk?

I sit on my couch at night thinking of why we don't talk.

It's been five days since you first ignored me.

Five days of sadness.

Four days of confusion.

Three days of questioning.

Two days of disappointment.

One day of loneliness.

I wanted it to end but not through quietness, I wanted it to end with a good bye, a sentence to close the book not continue it with pages filled with my thoughts.

Was I ever someone you really liked or was I just a gateway to have fun while you're talking about a mosquito trying to talk to you as I stand next to you waiting to speak?

I felt like a cloud in an otherwise blue sky, like quartz surrounded with diamonds.

Annoying and worthless.

I'm sorry for being a rain drop in your sunny day.

I know you didn't like the rain.

[tvstaticnois3]

I just want to cry on someone's shoulder, but if I had a shoulder to cry on, I wouldn't have anything to cry about. I'd have everything I need.

[tvstaticnois3]

I just want to cry on someone's shoulder, but if I had a shoulder to cry on, I would have anything to cry about. I'd have everything I need.

[tvstaticnois3]

I have no real friends, and they don't even know they aren't real.

[tvstaticnois3]

My friends are only my friends if I'm the ghost of who I really am.

[tvstaticnois3]

I want to feel like myself.

I want to be someone different.

I want to have long, dark brown hair with natural curls and waves.

I want to have big eyes and for them to look like the forest in summer evenings- hazel.

I want to have a smile that doesn't make my eyes squint into tiny lines.

I want my smile to be upturned and make cute little dimples in my cheeks.

To have a face without my annoying chubby cheeks.

And I want to look tan during summer and winter so I don't blend in with the sand or snow.

I don't Just want to be Like me.

I want to Feel like Myself.

[tvstaticnois3]

Same Movement, Same Pose, Different Eyes.

Why does my smile fade so fast when i see her body for a second too long?

Is it knowing that a blade has cut the skin I'm seeing? Is it knowing that maybe someone else is seeing the same skin and body I'm seeing right now in the same form, with the same movement or pose?

Maybe I'm scared of the blade being close by or maybe I'm just paranoid that a nother pair of eyes have crossed over the body and skin I'm seeing right now in the same form, with the same movement or pose?

April 28th, 2024

[tvstaticnois3]

My Pain, Guilt and Body

I will not make it if I don't find peace quick enough.

My pain will kill me

My guilt will kill me

My brain will kill me

My hands will do it.

(Not encouraging anyone to harm themselves! Please seek help if you need it. ♡)

[tvstaticnois3]

Who is My love for?

Why is it that love is so quick to come to people I know

but to me, love has been distant

Like it's afraid of my kind of view

love to me is like sleeping in your own bed after a long trip,

like the most perfect first kiss,

a beautiful sunset in autumn with leaves falling softly to the ground,

love is like a feather landing in a puddle filled with cherry blossoms - beautiful.

And with so much love in my heart I feel alone

I could spend it all on myself

my family

On my friends

Maybe even on a complete stranger.

So with so much love in my heart I still feel alone.

I don't even have anyone who could be a 'candidate' for my love.

I don't know who I'm saving it for.

[tvstaticnois3]

Friends Again.

It's not worth the risk for a friend again to turn against you.

You know she bites and infects.

A zombie at heart.

Infection spreads, wait till it gets you next.

No gun will save you from mental torture.

You can't kill what's already dead and no amount if medicine will bring back a lifelss, soulless mass of flesh.

It's whole purpose is to make you fall victim to a bullet just to be eaten alive after you no longer have the strength to fight back.

So please don't trust someone with a cut on their wrist with no second thought.

[tvstaticnois3]

Just Breathe.

Breathe in the air around you, and let your lungs filter what's good and bad. It's what they are made for, after all. Aren't they?

[tvstaticnois3]

70's

You are burnt into my corneas like 'GAME OVER' on old TVs,

Your voice is engraved into my brain like lines on vinyls,

And your touch is pressed into my skin like ink on polaroids.

The way your eyes look made me want to cry out for the good of all people.

Because oh dear, the tears made my heart tear up - into a tiny fine line on your bathroom sink with a dollar next to it like a crown worn on the day you turn ten.

Oh what a sight to see on a seamlessly sightful day.

But it's better than seeing it on a sightless day with nothing to expect cause the shock will strangl you more than on a seamlessly sightful day.