all the exits underground

independent private selective multimuse written by john. remade 13th august 2021.

[undergroundexits]

hi! so i’m rebooting/revamping this blog. deleting (probably) (nearly) every post on this blog, and then re-dropping tags, then starter calls, and headcanons, which will take a while this will be a super low activity blog + my primary rp blog will be peter’s. also, i only want to follow people who do want to write with me, so i don’t mind being hardblocked/softblocked if that’s no longer the case on your end.

(please give this a like if you see this, thank you, so i know people have read it.)

more ‘comprehensive’ to-do:

delete so many posts <3

save headcanons and such (maybe private them?)

re-make tags (this’ll take forever but this is the third step and go No Further until they’re All Done + Drafted, Ready To Queue)

re-drop starter calls + relationship calls

re-fiddle g.oogle d.ocument

maybe re-make an interest sheet + form

maybe re-do carrd (for now, ignore it)

other blogs: @/oceancorpo (paola abadjieva, hiatus), @/synkyng (peter synks, low activity), @/lover-ish (personal blog, very active lol)

[undergroundexits]

ack ok. relationship tags. i will Not be making tag drops for them bc there’s just so many. but anyway here’s the list (under construction obvsly LOL) i’ll be finishing these off and then getting around to the other tags that i will actually throw on here Eventually. 

[undergroundexits]

hiiiii hi hihihihihihihihihi look at this lovely art piece i commissioned from @/samarzart <3 (here’s the commission post if you want to commission samar)

[undergroundexits]

teddy baby. little babby boy.

anyway i don’t think he really knows he’s like. gay at the age of 10, like there may be inklings where he’s like “oogh, charlie :] boy bestie” (charlie being charlemagne, his echonet friend), but it doesn’t really sink in until he’s like... really socialised with other people and is exposed to More People than just like. Alex and some robots (and skags). so like maybe 12/13 he gets a real tangible sense of “oh? gay gay homosexual gay? :0 ... :D” and he vibes with it.

may also re-consider whether charlie is the One And Only Boyfriend (bc it’s. i know. not realistic. and same the other way with charlie), but they Are so very boy besties, regardless. friends 4 lyfe no matter what.

[clonelyboy]

yah. as usual, nab this from me

(left to right: teddy, alex, mili)

[undergroundexits]

also her increasing dependence on nanites to keep things under control -- she’s only one person (maybe) who’s the boss/ceo of m.aliwan now, when she never wanted to be before -- so she just. Fades into a sort-of-sleep when they take over and keep everything running as smooth as possible. so yeah, weird nanite boss now we guess !

but also i am thinking of her accidentally “by ta.los this can’t be happening” jr if he has been terrarium’d. rip those nanites kept her busy bro sorry

[undergroundexits]

forgot about how naoko deals with atlas (if she’s in complete control) + the ca.lypso twins (if they’d already struck a deal with jr by that point) in her usurper verse... probably other things (her relationship with honey, if i’m not shipping with anyone else, remains Mostly the same. ish.)

[undergroundexits]

naoko’s re-worked Usurper verse

injects her nanites earlier than in canon (by about... some time before the z.anara incident), figuring “what the hell, let’s go, things can’t be any worse (for me) than it already is, and if i get do.ctor octo.pus’d, then it’s no longer my problem”. Healthy Coping Mechanism, For Sure (/s)

anyway. integration, nanites learning everything she knows, she feels them. and then they kill her parents (lol). she panics a bit, not being totally in control (but she does love this hint of freedom, now, especially with her mother being dead as she was the worst of the two parents), but she calls a meeting with the rest of her siblings.

parents’ heads on display as she sits on the throne. interesting meeting! kills issako (he sucks) with her nanites, and leaves the choice to the others whether to leave of their own choice, stay without challenging her (and her now-visible nanites kinda... swarm-clouding around her), or. Die. some stay, some leave (happily! at least two -- gorou + kiyoko).

jr, her most favourite sibling, gets the additional choice: power over m.aliwan entirely and she can be his second-in-command of sorts (or she can also just... leave; she doesn’t actually like it here, even with the worst offenders dead).

whatever happens with jr depends on interaction, i suppose. if he’s like “yeah ok lol >:)” then she’s happy enough to go along with whatever (up until the ca.lypsos. she has tiny small amounts of morality still). if he’s like “fuck u lol” then uh... take his ass to the terrarium i guess lol (either he escapes or he’s stuck, and naoko’s in control of m.aliwan instead). (happy to discuss this part btw. ^_^)

she also gives herself a lobotomy afterwards. it’s. hm. well, she couldn’t’ve done it without her nanites, and it sorta-kinda didn’t do much anyway, mostly. she’s still herself (plus or minus this or that).

[undergroundexits]

yeth. (picre.w here.)

[magtitude]

Jemima’s got this habit where she’ll try to stop herself crying, if ever the urge all ugly and big and suffocating and threatening to overwhelm her, by swallowing it all back down – literally! near-literally anyway, swallowing that big pill lump in her throat – but that on it’s own isn’t quite enough. ‘Steeling herself’ could be anything – could be brushing the cry-time feelings under the proverbial doormat, or… just squinting. Sometimes it’s that, just squinting real hard like she’s trying to turn her eye inside out, or pop it back into her skull instead so it’s impossible for her to cry, even if she’s still got the other eye.

Keep reading

[undergroundexits]

i need to set up naoko’s re verse i guess. uhh oh ye i talked about it a bit with rain and then. i forgor [skull emoji]

tldr: she creates nanites, unlike canon she puts them in herself immediately, she has an ego also (she deserves it), m.aliwan is after her bc she’s doing unauthorised shit + now has This Shit, On The Run so her brother doesn’t kill her for dissection/vivisection reasons (i guess?), FAR more impulsive than in canon (not to say that she’s thoughtless, just more “!!!” ya kno)

also maybe gorou + kiyoko still survive ? it depends on whether jr’s in need of the same succession as in canon hm...

[undergroundexitssideblog]

FORCE A SMILE AND NEVER SAY WHAT YOU MEAN

nicole homer, underbelly / nicole krauss, the history of love / anne carson, plainwater: essays and poems / jean anouilh, antigone (translated by lewis galantiere) / foster the people, ask yourself / john steinbeck, east of eden / marie howe, after the movie

Keep reading

[undergroundexits]

starts scratching at the walls

naoko: no i can’t kill my brother (lets you think it’s only because it’s dangerous for her to get physically close enough to do so) you can do it tho lol (hands you her gun)

[undergroundexits]

something about how naoko does sees jr as her brother + her (past) partner-in-crime in their youth + her enemy + just another part of her (especially more so bc i headcanon them as twins, but it depends on interaction obvsly) + her would-be friend if only he wasn’t such a prick (she understands why, doesn’t want to) + her mirror (perfect) + her mirror (fucked-up).

he is his own person, and that’s good!!! but he is a threat bc of his ambitions which wouldn’t be so bad if he wasn’t out to kill (wouldn’t have to kill his way to the top if their parents treated them like people, but it’s easier to, potentially, lash out horizontal against a peer than it is to rebel against your higher-ups).

so viewing him as an extension of herself (her mirror, multiple mirrors, multiple possibilities bc it’s only in her head, bc he’s his own person and she’s sort-of given up on the reality of ever healing their relationship) is... a daydream fantasy (of her helping him but only if he ever bothers to make the decision to actually change his mind -- can’t be too out of character). a shitty coping mechanism bc she hasn’t quite yet finished (or started) grieving the death/decline of her relationship with her brother.

[kafk-a]

Michael Burkard

[typodescript]

[text ID: UNTITLED

I wanted to love those I wanted to love, often I did not want those who loved me: it was

a disagreement with myself as if myself was myself, like trees which are so laden with night they are night trees,

which they are not. Sometimes the end is a contradiction of the tale: the end is simply not the end, the contradiction

of wanting the end and not wanting it. I want you. I no longer want. I wanted to love those I wanted. end ID]

[undergroundexits]

naoko when dancing is a hobby: ^_^

naoko when competitive dancing exists:

[undergroundexits]

REPOST AND BOLD WHAT YOUR MUSE CAN DO. ( italics for what they could do, but have never attempted to. )

swim / scubadive / read and write / do calligraphy / ride a bike / ride a unicycle / ride a motorcycle / drive / draw / sing / play an instrument / maintain a rhythm / converse in a language / converse in more than two languages / converse in more than four languages / do basic maths / do algebra / understand structural formulas / read a floorplan / assemble ikea / build a working piece of furniture / build a house / sew a button / customise clothes / make clothes / bind a book / use a vacuum / clean windows without leaving streaks / boil water / make pasta / remove the pit of an avocado / cut bell peppers / cook / bake / basic first aid / cpr / close a bullet wound / fire a gun / load a gun / shuffle a deck of cards / shuffle a deck of cards one-handed / play or read tarot / use matches / use a lighter / make a fire without either / code / start a computer / hack / steal a car without keys / pick a lock / kick down a door / throw a punch / put an opponent smaller than them into a chokehold / put an opponent larger than them into a chokehold / intentionally break a bone / make a cast / chop down a tree / put up a tent / make a knot / create a shelter without tools or brought materials / make a cocktail / cut a line of cocaine / change a diaper / recite a nursery rhyme from memory / recite an important religious code from memory / recite the table of elements from memory / recite all pokemon in the pokemon song from memory / recite a 10-digit code 24 hours later after only reading it once / tell a person’s zodiac sign / tell a person’s age / play football / play basketball / play another ball sport / iceskate / use an audio recording device / use a camera / tattoo / do a piercing.