Waking up the day after Odaiba day to FIND THIS HEARTBREAKINGLY BEAUTIFUL PIECE OF FANART plastered on my tl is actually wild, but what's more insane is that OP chose to post this on August 1st 😭
But anyway, in my timezone it's 2nd August so let's rant about Nishijima and Taichi in Tri shall we 🫡
(adding this after concluding the post, I accidentally wrote a mini Taichi centred fanfic at the end hehe)
I think a LOT of people underplay the trauma Taichi would receive over witnessing the death of Nishijima. The discussion around the scene has always revolved around the 02 kids and how they were treated in this scene, and never about how Taichi didn't get any time to process the sacrifice that was made to save him, and that as soon as he got back to his world he had to face Ordinemon and make the decision of killing a fellow chosen's partner.
Which brings me back to Taichi's struggle in the first half of Tri, where he is coming to terms with the aftermath and effect of Digimon battles on the real world. He is struggling to find the balance between what is the right thing to do for both the real and the Digital world, and if there can ever be any equilibrium between the two which doesn't cause harm to either.
Enter Nishijima, who in Taichi's eyes was probably just one of those chill teachers you don't mind messing around and joking with a little bit. Now he finds out that his sensei was also a Chosen Child, that not only is he looking out for Taichi in terms of school but could also help guide them through the difficulty they are facing with the Digital World.
He goes from a cool teacher to a mentor worth looking up to in no time AND IT IS THEN THAT NISHIJIMA BECOMES A VICTIM TO THE PROBLEM THAT TAICHI IS TRYING TO SOLVE FROM THE BEGINNING.
Nishijima dying is the consequence of Taichi and the 02 kids making it out of captive alive, it is the very act that Taichi was scared of witnessing from his first battle against Kuwagamon in Reunion.
Do you really think that that wouldn't leave a lasting impact on Taichi's mind affecting every single decision that he makes from there on?
Of course in contrast, we can say that the other kids are also acting under the assumption Taichi was dead at the beginning of Our Future, but you know what the difference is?
They have their partners and they have each other and THEY GET THE TIME TO TALK ABOUT IT.
Gabumon comforts Yamato which imho probably has some of the best dialogue between a Chosen and their Partner in all of Digimon, Piyomon is ready to stand up for Sora, Takeru and Sora both look after Hikari. When they face Ordinemon, they all have had a moment to think about what they need to do without Taichi as a leader.
He escapes at the cost of Nishijima's life, has to ensure the safety of the 02 kids and immediately goes back to fight alongside Agumon, Yamato and the others.
When he decides that the only way out of this problem is to end Ordinemon, Hikari objects and expresses her disappointment in him, a scene which is so rare since the beginning of Adventure, but so needed. Hikari assumed that she lost Taichi, but seeing him again fills her with the light that Tailmon always tries to guide her towards. Taichi does not get that opportunity. He knows that if Ordinemon isn't taken care of, the consequences would be irreversible.
This is Taichi's trolley problem, and as someone who studied Philosophy in undergrad, I personally like to believe that Taichi made the choice not because morally the pros of ending Ordinemon outweigh the cons, but because he could feel the guilt of not being able to save Nishijima and he did not want Meiko or Meicoomon in the future to suffer with the burden of causing so much destruction.
Now to move away from the canon a little bit, I like to wonder about how Taichi move on from a death that he experienced so up close.
It is my hc that the government and the Data Management org that Maki and Nishijima worked for does not really explain their disappearance well to their next of kin, after all it is a big miss on their part to have lost two of their agents on duty. I'd like to believe that they're treated as MIA rather than dead (which Adventure Beyond proves because Maki is in the hospital with Kido bros, Meiko makes an appearance as well but of course Nishijima was not referenced at all, cementing his demise further).
I'd like to think Taichi has many sleepless nights right after the Ordinemon incident, where he blames his ineptness, his shortcomings for Nishijima's death. What could he have done differently to save the 02 kids and Nishijima together in that moment? Why wasn't he strong enough? Why did Nishijima think Taichi was worth giving his life away for?
It shows on his face, and everyone around is concerned for him, but no one knows the right way to comfort him since his experience is lost on them.
It is something his mother mentions, which triggers a reaction in Taichi. When he moves out of the house for the first time while going to college, his mother cracks a joke but he can see the fear she tries to hide behind her bright eyes. She says, that now that Taichi would no longer come home everyday, she wasn't sure if she'd sleep well at night not knowing when he would be coming home next.
The words stick with him and he thinks about Nishijima's parents, he thinks about whether his sensei's mother is still holding out hope for her son to come home.
Fuelled by a need to seek some closure, he tracks down Nishijima's family home and shows up without really having prepared or gathered his thoughts. The one to answer the door is Nishijima's mother, and when Taichi sees her, the burden of truth pushes down on him with a force he cannot resist. He trembles and has to rest his palms on his knees, take a few deep breaths before he can straighten up and face Ms. Nishijima again.
He explains to her that he is one of the students Nishijima taught in school, she happily lets him in and over some tea and snacks they make some small talk. Ms. Nishijima tells him that she was a single mother from the start, and it was always just her and Daigo agaisnt the world. It's not easy for Taichi to meet her eye when she talks and he tried to look at the photos she'd arranged the house instead.
Eventually Taichi's eyes fall on an old photo on the wall, one of a much younger Nishijima with Bearmon and his mother.
He immediately interrupts her and questions her about what all she knows about the Digital World. It turns out that Nishijima had shared everything with his mother, even the fact that him and Maki broke up because of her obsession to bring back their partners. Taichi swallows the lump in his throat and clenches his fists as he begins to explain the incidents that happened during that summer.
When he comes to the part about Nishijima's death, his voice breaks and his head hangs in shame, he even finds it difficult to finish the sentence but Ms. Nishijima understands exactly what he his trying to say.
A dreary silence settles in the room, but after pulling every bit of courage that rests inside him, Taichi looks up to face Nishijima's mother. He finds her looking at that photo, the one with Bearmon.
A sad smile covers her face even as the tears fall freely. In the end, she turns to Taichi and thanks him for coming forward with the truth. As he is leaving, she makes him promise that he will make the most of the life that Nishijima helped him save.
A week or two later, Taichi is informed by his mother that someone named Nishijima left a message for him on their house's telephone. Taichi calls her back and is invited to a small funeral service being held for Nishijima. There he meets the other people who had also travelled to the Digital World with Maki and Nishijima, their friends beg Taichi that if there is no certainty about Maki's whereabouts, they should continue looking for her (and thus begins the rescue mission which connects to the canon in Beyond).
After the funeral service, Taichi is shaken so he heads back to his home and not his apartment. He spends the night with his head lying in his mother's lap, crying until he feels that there is no strength left in him.
The next morning, when he wakes up, he realises that he still carries the burden of death within him, but somehow it feels a little lighter than it did the day before.
He realises then, it's not something that will disappear overnight but it is something that he will need to overcome every single day, by moving forward no matter the odds-
and by continuing to dream big.