(Loveless marriage, angst(some fluff) )
It was late and Ayato wasn't back yet, the food on the table that you lovingly made had gone cold and so did the wind. You weren't surprised but you still felt dissappointed.
Just the other night, Ayato swore he'd be more caring towards you and that he'd fix this loveless marriage. You were happy of course but part of you knew all along that his words were just empty promises. Still, you wanted to be wrong.
An hour later, Ayato returned looking disheveled. His coat was messy, his shirt unbuttoned and his tie around his neck.
His neck.
The collar of his shirt had traces of smeared lipstick all the way up to his mouth, his lips and his cheeks. Your gaze was fixed to the corner of his lips, the same one that smiled so lovingly to you during your wedding. The same lips that used to kiss you every night. Ayato noticed you staring at him,
"Don't be surprised, you knew this would happen someday" , he said coldly.
You had no word to say, you were so heartbroken and dissappointed that you didn't even have the energy to hit him or curse at him, or even cry. You just sat there motionless.
"Why her?", your voice trembling, barely a whisper.
"What more do you want from me Ayato? Ive done my part in being loyal to you and serving as your wife.", you finally say
"I don't know", ayato said.
You stood up, reaching over to ayato's lips to wipe away the traces of that other woman. Then removing his coat, putting it in the laundry basket.
"I think its better if we end this", he sighed
Why was it so easy for him to say that? Did he ever love you? As you realized the finality of that statement your heartbeat fastened, your hands trembled and you felt a pit in your chest, like someone had just tore away your beating heart and crushed it.
"Say it to me Ayato, tell me that you don't want me anymore, tell me that you want her"
No matter how much it would destroy you, you wanted to hear it from him. You wanted to know for sure that there was no chance of fixing your marriage and that Ayato didn't love you anymore.
"Listen, I-"
"Say it", you yelled. "If you ever loved me, say it and mean it."
"I don't love you anymore, this was just a marriage of convinience, for political reasons. I love her and i want to spend my life with her.", ayato declared as if he had waited his entire life to say this.
"Goodbye Ayato, I'll never stop loving you."
(1 year later)
You were walking in the streets of Liyue, it was Lantern Rite and you watched lanterns soaring up the sky, alone. Until you felt someone beside you. You recognized that perfume.
"Ayato?"
"It seems fate has brought us together yet again"
You noticed his tired face and how solemn he had looked but you didnt mind, you walked alongside each other, just like the past. His stride matched yours even your footsteps were in sync. Finally, you stopped at a hill to admire the scenery.
"I apologize, for everything", his voice trembled.
"Why, Ayato?"
"I've never stopped loving you, even as our distance grew my heart still remained close to you."
"Then why-"
"In truth, my duty as the commissioner is no safe task, i have been the target of multiple assassination attempts but of course i didn't mind, it was part of my job after all. However, people realized that the threat on my life was not as effective as they had hoped so they deliberately targetted the only thing i cared about."
You were silent, unable to say anything. You tried telling yourself that you didnt care about this man but why was there tears spilling from your eyes.
"I couldn't risk losing you, i much preferred if you were happier somewhere else even if that meant i was not by your side."
You noticed Ayato's mask slipping, his usually calm and stoic demeanour wavered as he stared at the distance, unable to look you in the eyes.
"Well, you're quite the strategist aren't you?", you joked, trying to lighten the situation.
Ayato smiled. His smile was almost a stranger to you.
The both of you spent the rest of the night talking about your favourite memories, reminiscing over the times you had together. Even joking about how Ayato used to be such a romantic.
"What's your favourite memory?"
"Hard to say when there's so many but i remember the time when you forgot an umbrella while it was raining hard in Narukami shrine. Your clothes were dripping wet and i covered you with my coat while we ran to take cover but then you slipped so we just decided to bask in the rain and dance along to the rhythm of the raindrops."
"Then we kissed", you added, "it was our first"
Ayato couldnt help but smile widely at that memory. But alas, this night had to end.
"It's not too late Ayato-"
"This isn't meant to be y/n, but jut because we can't be together doesn't mean I've stopped loving you"
You held your breath as his words pierced your heart yet again. Your body felt heavy as if you were falling to the deepest darkest trench as you see the light at the end of the tunnel dim.
You tried looking at the peaceful scenery, people gathering around the harbour excitedly and the lantern that floated towards the moon effortlessly, some dissapearing in the vast sky filled with tiny specks of light and some lanterns that failed to fly.
"The moon is beautiful isn't it?"
"It always is."