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the magnus archives: statement of dipshit mcidiot regarding some spooky happenings that absolutely without a doubt did not actually happen. recording by jonathan sims. i hate my fucking job.

malevolent: OARTHUR HIDE THE CORPSE IN THE CLOSET. SHOOT THIS MAN IN THE HEAD. MOVE OARTHUR MOVE!! [soft piano music] LEFT!! THE OTHER LEFT OARTHUR!!!!! JESUS FUCKING CHRIST.

nikoisme

This post is on my mind way too often

bamsara

When Narinder has the crown what does Lambert use as a weapon?

Fists

The Lamb can swing

bamsara

My Lamb when they find a heretic and they don't have the Red Crown

bamsara

My Lamb seeing one of the Bishop's walk past them in the cult grounds doing this for no reason

bamsara

My Lamb when Narinder makes another dumbahhh tsnudere remark

2dyara

rhythmic-idealist

Just so people know, epilepsy warnings aren’t about, like, purity culture, or online leftists acting as if disabled people are real. It’s about my mom

rhythmic-idealist

We human beings have discovered patterns of light and/or sound that kill some people and we should probably not have hissy fits about your right to fire a weapon at my mom. Like if you could put some text onscreen explaining the upcoming seizure-inducing patterns so that people can scroll away. That’s super fucking easy. i AM sorry that something as mindless as a tiktok edit could kill someone but hey, so could driving to work every morning, we all treat THAT accordingly (long, pointed stare. because yes we had better be treating that accordingly too)

The casual abundance of Thing That Kills People doesn’t mean you shouldn’t avoid killing people

rhythmic-idealist

#all media should have epilepsy warnings like all food should have allergy warnings#and if you disagree then I'll kick your ass

via @angst-and-fajitas

eightfifteen

Crazy how many people want characters in fiction to speak and act like they’ve had 20 hours of intensive therapy. Could NOT be me I want these bitches fucked up insane

plutojester

doingthewritethings

my friend briar and i lovingly call this one ‘therapy speak joker’ and it almost caused her to drop biological samples one time

dizzyghoast

i think the joker should start talking like this for real. no other character should do this only the joker. i want batman to have to deal with this

teaboot

Would you be comfortable with me sharing the story of how I got these scars

yellowflowrs

stupid doodles before I sleep for another 1000 years… see you guys later or not

depsidase

bosmerbutt

calliopeorgans

starting a collection

lunehowls

he may be your boss and hate you but at least he's bi

hikaaa-bi

“i asked chatgpt—” well i asked the ceaseless watcher to turn its gaze upon you

edettethegreat

rip magnus archives crew but I'm built different. if my boss was literally all-knowing and couldn't fire me, I'd be in his office all day asking him questions about everything. I wouldn't use google anymore. I'd be like "what's the rarest kind of tree frog" and he'd be like "shut up please shut up" but he'd tell me the answer every time.

and then I'd go home and immediately call him and be like "hey elias I forgot what time I put the burekas in the oven, how much longer should I leave them in"

and he'd be like "I hate you so much. you put them in 12:42. they should come out at 1:12"