does it hurt? does it bleed?

28 | poetry & personal sideblog

[valleyofveins]

it was not the lack of love that killed us,

but rather the abundance of it

without the right conduit to channel it

[valleyofveins]

the time has come

it comes for us all,

and i am not above that;

not anymore than you, it seems.

how will the message come?

a call? a text? an email?

god forbid you face me head on;

how would you expect me to take that?

do you remember the end how i do?

what do you expect me to give you?

i have no answer for your sins,

i have no station to absolve them

and i will not offer what you took from me.

i will not give what you withheld .

you got what you gave, and i hope more—

gone are the days where i give to you.

still, i wonder, how'd it end?

did you reap what you sowed?

are there swords in your heart,

and shards swimming in your veins?

do your eyes bleed?

do your dreams taunt?

does your conscious cry?

do your fears consume?

you may reach, outstretch your greedy hands

and i may shake, but i will swat them away

and with conviction i vow,

myself, to never betray

so come, take me on,

tell me your sorrows

and repent for your regrets

it is not for me to judge

and it is not for me to forgive.

[adventures-in-poor-planning]

yesterday I got the "are you a boy or are you a girl" question from a six-year-old, and I told her that some people aren't boys or girls (like me!) I was expecting her to be a little confused, but she nodded thoughtfully and said, "wow, just like snails."

[lizardho]

When I came out as trans it coincided pretty linearly in timelines with my uncle-by-marriage gaining primary custody of his kids in a messy divorce with my biological aunt. This was good because my aunt has tried to kill my mom before, like, full-on murder attempts, so while she had custody of the kids we weren’t able to interact with them since safely. My youngest cousin, an adorable end energetic 5-year-old at the time, had never met me so when she did for the first time I was about 8 months on HRT and she was bewildered by my gender. And being an energetic and curious child she asked me, so I stole an explanation I heard from someone else that was just “Being a boy made me really sick so me and my doctor decided to make me a girl so I could be happy and healthy again” and she said “Whoa, that sounds weird. I really like being a girl so I hope I don’t get sick” and I said “I hope you don’t get sick too” and then she asked if I wanted to sword fight and pulled out an actual metal sword she found in our basement and that was the whole interaction.