focus. @valuedbeauty - Tumblr Blog

I matched with this woman on Hinge and we've been talking for the past few weeks. It's definitely a slow burn scenario. Which I'm enjoying to say the least, it's out of my comfort zone (in many ways) and I think that's what I've been needing as of late. The mundane has been driving me mad when it comes to dating. Not rushing has made me more in tune with myself, her, and the bigger picture.

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by michellelartigue

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riverwindphotography

Clear as Crystal

(c) gifs by riverwindphotography, March 2025

mountainbaby25

Clarity.

I decided to go down memory lane of my photos (I was looking for something specific) and all these realizations hit me at once. It didn't help that I was comparing my current state to my past state.

It's funny how I look at myself 4-5 years ago and I was so skinny, borderline sick looking almost, then I look at myself now and I definitely gained weight. The other thing I noticed is how mentally unstable I was back then. Not in a good mind frame at all. Compared to now, I am much more stable. So it seems as though I traded in being thin and unstable, to being thick and stable lol.

I still don't know how to wrap my mind around it. I definitely want to be fit and active, so I think it's just a matter of fitting that into my day to day amongst everything else on my plate at the moment. That's a different post, if I ever get around to it. But yeah, I don't want to be stick skinny again, I just don't want to be out of shape and achy. Maybe this post is the motivation I need to get motivated.