I’ve been through hell. I’ve met the devil. I’ve been accompanied by a demon. I beated up my beloved ones. I broke their hearts and hurt them so badly leaving scars on their soul that might never heal. I’ve lived a life full of lies. Hatred filled me up day by day. Senseless Hatred against Human beings, the world, life. My heart was torn. My mind was blank. My eyes were empty and my body was bleeding. I screamed in my dreams. I wished for death. I saw ghosts and shadows and I wasn’t even afraid. I felt more at ease when I was among them than when I was among my family. I left my home in the light and the warmth for a new one in the darkness and the cold. I walked down an unknown path towards complete darkness and loneliness; blindly lost. The echoe of the voices in my head were louder than any sound of nature. My body was walking on this planet as if there was no soul. My mouth got dry, I’ve become deaf and dumb. I lost my Joy, my smile, my Happiness. No, I didn’t lose them - I rejected them. They were always around me, trying to reach me but i was untouchable. I became invisible in that world. A wandering body that without soul. A breathing being without any signs of life. I had no friends. I was always alone, pushing away those that truly loved me. I chose solitude and hatred over family and love. I was a heartless kind of being. Yes, indeed, I was emotionless. People say that when you love someone or something then you do not need a reason, a reason is only needed for hatred - But I had no fucking reason. I just hated everything and everyone and even myself. Living was like hell and Death was my only imagination of salvation. I was hopeless, caught in a cage that was myself. I was a marionette of the devil yet at the same time the human shape of Death. Eventually, people started to point fingers at me. ’ Monster ’ they yelled. ’ And I did not contradict because they were right. In some ways, I was indeed a Monster. Well, I did not know who I was though, but I was probably just the human shape for everything bad that humans can think of. I was living in an utopia where nothing was real yet everything felt so right.
I was sad. Definitely. I felt profound sadness. I was hurt. Indeed. I felt unbearable pain. And I was conviced that Humans, other living beings, the entire world, actually my very own life were the cause for my suffering.
I wanted to quit. Leaving everything I ever had behind. I wanted to be free. Free from those everyday struggles. I wanted to end the war that was going on inside me. I was slowy losing all my senses. I could barely hold myself anylonger. My only goal was in the darkness. I just wanted it to end already. The hatred, the pain, the struggles, life.
I just wanted to give in to my despair.
Eventually, that fortunate incident occurred.
Something was coming my way, getting closer and closer. That something was so bright that it didnt took any shape. It had no sound. No smell. No physical form.
Yet, it felt so warm and gentle. It was overwhelming, filling me up with a sensation that was up till then unknown to me. That sensation was like a feeling. Yes, definitely.
I could feel it in every inch of my body, from my toes, to my head, to my finger tips, all the way through. It was so warm that it melt the ice that surrounded me; so gentle that I could feel the blood running through my veins. My heart was working. My mind became clearer and my body was slowly being filled with ‘life’.
That sensation was saving me.
It’s called Love.
gamechangershow
izzy806
dailybridgerton